I Have Schizoaffective Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 657 People

    Dare I say that I found healing from my

    schizoaffective disorder when I lost my family doctor......Truth be told I would have probably still found healing if he would have stayed but stopped being such a jerk. I was already almost there, I was hearing angels singing, especially when I warmed up to the idea of liking...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    Jan 6

    So I'm trying to reach out to other people

    that schizoaffective it is fun to talk to them because I feel like they understand and sometimes they don't but it's ok also g as we are both diffrent. Normal people are usually lame. I don't know about other people that are schizoaffective but I am very picky about the company...
    twoface88 twoface88
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Mar 14, 2014

    I used to have a handsome family doctor,

    but I ended up having a few fantasies about him which made me feel very uncomfortable and I begged God to forgive me for, because I didn't want to think of my family doctor in that way...It was too late, because God inspired a movie about us and it was romantic, and my family...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    1 Response Mar 7

    Could I actually have schizoaffective disorder?

    Was diagnosed bipolar 2 yrs ago. On 150 mg of seroquil nightly. My mood is pretty much fully stabilized, however I suffer a strange delusion. I believe that pictures of people in posters, dvd covers, etc. can actually hear and see me. Of course I know this is impossible, yet I...
    Cassmaster5000 Cassmaster5000
    31-35, F
    1 Response Feb 19

    We Are Not Crazy. We Are Gifted.

    i think that us who are schizoaffective are not crazy or delusional. i think that we are able to see another side of life that very few can. i think we have our own perception of things and yeah maybe sometimes it gets a little screwed up. i think that ' normal ' non-schizo...
    steadybein steadybein
    18-21, F
    14 Responses Aug 9, 2011

    I Am Living With Schizoaffective Disorder And I'M Beating It........

    I have been sick most all of my life. I'm forty years old now. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder first in 1999, and I was suffering from Chronic Post Tramatic Stress Disorder at that time but was not diagnosed for that until 2008. In 2003 the doctors added Schizoaffective...
    freedompride freedompride
    36-40
    3 Responses May 16, 2013

    Hi,my names alex and i have schizoaffective

    disorder.i was working for 3 weeks as a phone operater and it didnt work out.i ended up getting to stressed out so i quit.keeping a job with a mental illness is very hard to do.has anyone with a mental illness been able to keep a job? 3 weeks is the longest ive lasted sense i...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    7 Responses Feb 20, 2015

    Having to constantly Monitor your thoughts to

    make sure it's not a crazy thought is very tiresome.
    Dahlia86 Dahlia86
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Mar 19

    How has being schizoaffective affected your

    relationships? positively or negatively
    everyonecallsmephoenix everyonecallsmephoenix
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Dec 24, 2015

    Successfully Managing Schizoaffective Disorder.

    Hi there ^_^ I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder shortly before my 18th birthday. Then when I was 19 I began hearing voices in my head. I soon thought that anyone I thought of could hear my thoughts. This would include the whole world if I simply thought of (and to) the whole...
    XSu1c1deK1ngX XSu1c1deK1ngX
    22-25
    3 Responses Aug 26, 2010
    SadieCosmo SadieCosmo
    16-17, F
    1 Response Feb 29

    I still get the fragrance of life to love you,

    so I will continue to do so. I don't really want to sin, nor make it wrong in any way. I just want to love people, in time maybe I will train myself better to not make a mess of things, it's just hard when there is a devil there trying to corrupt me, but maybe one day I will be...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    Mar 5

    Though my darkness has turned to light I still

    have my old habits.....I still spend all of my time alone in my bedroom, I am terribly shy around people, conversations longer than a minute make me very uncomfortable....Socially I feel stunted, I am mostly uncomfortable with people, because they can't relate to my experiences...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    Mar 24

    To those who have read my story on

    why I don't want any kids.. this is one of the reasons. I don't think it would be fair to push a child through something that I can not control, let alone live with the rest of my life. By the way, the stuff I said on that story where just a ton of thoughts and feelings I needed...
    RoyalGoldx RoyalGoldx
    26-30, M
    Feb 1, 2014

    I think it's time for me to come out

    and admit this. I was diagnosed at 17 with Schizoaffective Disorder. I don't like to talk about it much because it's very personal and it tends to scare a lot of people away.. but what a lot of people don't understand is that on the surface, I appear fairly normal, just like...
    BellsproutDigsIt BellsproutDigsIt
    26-30, M
    4 Responses Sep 6, 2014

    When things are bad they are ******* terrible I

    don't want to be alone but I'm so uncomfortable around others it's like I want to be alone but I'm sad because I am it makes no sense I don't know what to do I feel like I'm slowly becoming trapped in my own mind
    twoface88 twoface88
    26-30, M
    1 Response Apr 7, 2014

    I've experienced symptoms all my life,

    but it didn't reach it's absolute peak until October of this year. Even before, I repeatedly let everyone around me know that I desperately needed help. Help I got alright. After a failed suicide attempt, I was placed in Hell On Earth, otherwise know as Summit Ridge. The only...
    everyonecallsmephoenix everyonecallsmephoenix
    18-21, F
    6 Responses Dec 18, 2015

    Uhhhh...

    I don't know where to begin. My heart and mind are racing because i dont know what to say. My palms are sweating. Just the act of posting my thoughts and feelings on the internet makes me scared and paranoid. I'm not the best a handling this disorder. I dont talk to anyone...
    silverhand10 silverhand10
    22-25, M
    7 Responses Mar 26, 2011

    I have been working on forgiveness

    for a really long time, it helps me to write it all out....And yes with love in my heart, I will forgive him, and God for allowing satan to reek havoc in my life, and the undercovers, and eventually the psychic. Though I will never trust them again, except for God.......I have...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    2 Responses Mar 7

    A Gift?

    i've been to two psychiatrist's within the last two months; and finally that is, after waiting my whole life to come out and say something. i have routines that i do to avoid being scared. when i say scared; i mean i panic.. and freak out kindof? i like to call it "episodes...
    amberrr amberrr
    16-17, F
    11 Responses Dec 11, 2007

    I dont know what to say to be honest.

    I have never been much of a conversationalist unless i'm in a really good mood. Ive been through some hectic psychotic episodes that lasted for long periods of time. Ive been well for a good while now but only recently have i actually experienced what its like to be happy even...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Apr 19, 2014

    My delusion is that everyone

    or most people can read my mind. Insert thoughts into it and I am being stalked by everyone around the world. My voices told me that i CAN'T DIE AND I am destined to be raped and murdered for a long time. Can you guys read my mind? Do you know who I am?
    LissMiss2 LissMiss2
    31-35, F
    1 Response Feb 26

    I am tempted by your beauty,

    in both face and form, and your lovely voice with that wonderful accent......But the way you push me away with your lewd comments, becomes a toxic playground for my demons....It kept me in a weakened state, if only I wasn't so attracted to you, then I would have never had those...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    Mar 5

    This Is The Soundtrack Of My Life Living With

    Schizoaffective Disorder Every song I post is an excellent representation of what I went through living with Schizoaffective disorder from the very first voice to my mania to the hardships I've endured. What brought me to the faith in God who was the only one who was ever on my...
    SealedWithAKisss SealedWithAKisss
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Mar 24, 2014

    I just found out I have schizoaffective disorder

    and some days is difficult to cope with the racing thoughts and the voices. I start hear voices at age of 23. Now 44 and finally being treated. I do want to work but is difficult hearing voices and having racing thoughts. I have been suffering in mind since 23 and now 44. Many...
    favorone favorone
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Feb 28

    I don't think what I have seen is unreal.

    I started seeing non-corporeal faces around / in front of normal human faces. Anyone else?
    SadieCosmo SadieCosmo
    16-17, F
    4 Responses Dec 22, 2015

    I have been dealing with this illness Since the

    age of 16. I am 33 now. It was a HUGE turning point in my life. It changed EVERYTHING. I had 3 Head injuries, the 3rd one was a kick to the head from someone sliding into first base during a baseball game causing a contusion. 3 months later, I started having dellusions. The...
    Crazy4capoeira Crazy4capoeira
    31-35, M
    Nov 7, 2014

    I am finally doing well enough to move out to

    my own apartment I think and living with my mom has really stunk the last little while but my mom said that if I move out there is no opportunity to move back in with her because she needs to figure out her life too. I'm afraid that if I move out and relapse I won't be able to...
    ParanoidGirl ParanoidGirl
    26-30
    Apr 7

    I know the truth now,

    time on my own, with God has really helped me. I don't know what I'd do without God's guidance, especially when He speaks to me through His people, and the fragrance of life. There is so much damage done, from the perfect storm it is time to rebuild, time to reject any crazy...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    1 Response Mar 10

    I think that living with mental illness is like

    experiencing life through more than one set of eyes, like when you are checking and when you aren't. you get more than one vantage point. it can almost be a blessing in disguise to be able to see the world more than one way. I don't know about you, but I have lived with this...
    JaclynAisling87 JaclynAisling87
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jun 14, 2015

    I have no idea what that is,

    please educate me
    xXShellyBeanXx xXShellyBeanXx
    13-15, F
    2 Responses Dec 12, 2015

    So at the age 20 I was diagnosed with

    schizoaffective disorder. I have been diagnosed with a chemical imbalance since the age of seven as they did not want to label a seven year old schizophrenic. I used to throw huge fights kick hit punch then when I was calm my mum would ask why I would respond she told me too .at...
    justwanabe justwanabe
    26-30, F
    Apr 5, 2014

    Hi, I have Schizoaffective Disorder,

    and I feel like I have split personalities, one is the Schizoaffective part of me, the one who talks about angels and demons, light and darkness and the world, and who has a very difficult time getting out of bed, and suffers from anxiety and heart problems, then there is the...
    SealedWithAKisss SealedWithAKisss
    31-35, F
    6 Responses Apr 30, 2015

    I have a spirit that makes me feel like hugging

    people, and that leaps out of me and onto the other person. I don't know if it is an angel or an impure spirit? It's kind of humorous and awkward at the same time.......The last two times I felt it, was when I bought my elliptical from a stranger, and we both loaded it up in my...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    1 Response Mar 7

    Climbing Up From Rock Bottom

    I began having mental health issues (mainly depression and an eating disorder) when I was fourteen but I was not diagnosed with Schizoaffective Disorder until I was 19.  It was at 19 that I began to experience severe paranoia.  Shortly after that the voices...
    CloserToFine CloserToFine
    22-25, F
    6 Responses Jul 19, 2008

    I Keep My Illness A Taboo

    It's hard being around people. I don't go to church anymore. I went to several churches in my life. A Baptist Church, Non-Denominational, no matter where I go. I keep my illness a Taboo. The last time I went to church on a regular basis, I attended bible study each week. It took...
    noaht43 noaht43
    41-45, T
    7 Responses Aug 24, 2012

    For a long time, I really thought I just had

    OCD, considering the fact that I don't view the term "hallucination" the same way the doctors do. I am aware that I have horrible paranoia, and it's scary, but it's for a reason to me. I am aware that I see and feel things that others don't, but I believe that it's that I have...
    theactualme theactualme
    13-15, F
    1 Response Mar 1

    So, does anyone have a mental volume?

    Like, do your thoughts get loud or really quiet? I've tried explaining it to people and no one understands
    everyonecallsmephoenix everyonecallsmephoenix
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Dec 18, 2015

    iwas diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder,

    although i dont think i actualy have that.im going to therapy and i think it s helping. tomorrow is my first day of work i havent worked in a year.i think i might be able to keep this job,im going to give it my all. my therapys wants me take take my meds but im not mentally ill...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses Mar 17, 2014

    A Lifetime Of Confusion

    When I was 8 years old, my parents divorced and I never felt truly happy ever again. Then when I was 10, both parents met new partners. I was living with my Dad, who told me on the Friday that he was getting married. I was overjoyed. Not only would I get a new step-brother, I...
    Gledwood Gledwood
    36-40, M
    4 Responses Jun 3, 2011

    My Uncomfortable Mind....Battling Schizoaffective Disorder and PTSD

    I should probably tell you a little about myself. I have been described by friends as "sweet", "kind", and "quiet". I love animals, art, children, and life itself on the good days. I have been married to Frank for 18 years and he is the most supportive person I have ever met. Our...
    ChristineX ChristineX
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Jun 9, 2013

    Gifted Yet Difficult

    I was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was 19 but something changed in 2005 it was then when my darkness turned to light my diagnoses changed from schizophrenia to schizoaffective disorder. You see I am a Christian, I have been redeemed back in 2000 after I had sold my soul by...
    SealedWithAKisss SealedWithAKisss
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Jul 25, 2012

    I was locked in a state hospital

    for 1 year when I was 15 then in and out until I was 21. Anyone else feel hospitals when frequent took away your best teen days sure did mine it made me fail school too
    Thewolfman0320 Thewolfman0320
    22-25, M
    1 Response Jan 5

    I was diagnosed with Schizoaffective disorder

    in April of 2012 but I'm starting to think I was diagnosed wrong. I have the symptoms of Schizoaffective disorder but I also have a very hard time taking care of myself and my house. I always have to be reminded to bathe and other personal hygiene activities or clean my room or...
    ParanoidGirl ParanoidGirl
    26-30
    3 Responses Dec 15, 2015

    My Story

    I guess it all has to do with perspective, with reality, with what we see ourselves as being, and how we cope.  I reach far into myself every day to find hope.  I pray I always have this capacity.  I need God, I need my true friends, and I need compassion for what I am and...
    Poseidon23 Poseidon23
    26-30, M
    1 Response Mar 24, 2011

    I am back to having visual hallucinations in my

    head. Last night I was seeing the devil trying to have sex with me. Than I dreamt of people with open stomach wounds walking around and talking to me. Scared because the voices have told me that I won't be able to die and will be the last person on earth. I am also seeing live...
    LissMiss2 LissMiss2
    31-35, F
    Mar 17

    I don't think I'd ever tell anyone

    but I might as well. I have Schizoaffective Disorder which, in a basic definition, it's like Bipolar and Schizophrenia, some people have disagreed with me but that's the basic definition of it. They say " How can you have both?" well, both are very different disorders. I have...
    BellsproutDigsIt BellsproutDigsIt
    26-30, M
    Apr 17, 2014

    Being someone with schizophrenia my delusions

    are hard to explain. I learn the word apophenia which is the human tendency to perceive meaningful patterns within random data. I experience delusions that appears like revelations. Another word is hindsight bias aka knew it all along. That is where after an event you feel like...
    Dahlia86 Dahlia86
    26-30, F
    1 Response Feb 22

    Does This Seem A Psychotic Episode?

    hello to everyone on this site. I have struggled with my mental health for over a year now and my diagnosis has changed from ;"first episode psychosis" to simply "severe anxiety" to "the most severe anxiety you have ever seen" to psydo psychosis to "over active imagination" to...
    alicefg alicefg
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Jun 22, 2013

    Accepting Me

    Although I have been diagnosed since the age of 17 with various different mental health illnesses and disorders, which can change based on symptoms just for the sake of a diagnosis (really just to appease the insurance companies so the doctor can get paid), after close evaluation...
    callmemomma25 callmemomma25
    31-35, F
    9 Responses Mar 10, 2013

    I have made it to the other side,

    I went from being a full blown paranoid schizophrenic to someone who can hear heaven, no more hell, and it's all because of what Jesus has done for me and taught me. I know that I am going to heaven, I can already hear it now, a choir of heavenly angels singING holy holy holy...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    Mar 24

    I was going to wait for a bit to come out with

    this, normally because people tend to judge when it comes to psychological disorders, especially unknown ones. I was diagnosed at 17, I had an exceptionally hard time dealing with the fact that I was probably going to have to deal with my demons for the rest of my life. My...
    Dereth Dereth
    26-30, M
    1 Response Jan 1

    I am at work, everything was going good.

    Saw my boss and started seeing the people I work with in my head again. Nothing too bad but I see there faces. With the delusion they can read my mind I am freaking out. I can't have anymore episodes. I was doing so well. Destressing tonight hopefully it all stops soon. Help me...
    LissMiss2 LissMiss2
    31-35, F
    1 Response Mar 14

    This Is The Soundtrack Of My Life Living With Schizoaffective Disorder

    Every song I post is an excellent representation of what I went through living with Schizoaffective disorder from the very first voice to my mania to the hardships I've endured. What brought me to the faith in God who was the only one who was ever on my side which led me to peace...
    SealedWithAKisss SealedWithAKisss
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Nov 15, 2013

    I have tasted and seen the revelation of the

    gospel unfold in my life, words written in the pages of the bible, come to life constructed by evil men and women, who exploited a mentally ill woman as a saint, and then hunted her down with a paranoid schizophrenic who voiced what her demons uttered about my past thus...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    2 Responses Jan 14

    This Is The Soundtrack Of My Life Living With

    Schizoaffective Disorder Every song I post is an excellent representation of what I went through living with Schizoaffective disorder from the very first voice to my mania to the hardships I've endured. What brought me to the faith in God who was the only one who was ever on my...
    SealedWithAKisss SealedWithAKisss
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Jan 16, 2014

    The first time I had schizoaffective symptoms

    was middle school. I thought once all these disorder were caused and had completely blocked out these troubling memories. The mood problems started during my teenage years, where I remember being the most manic. Depression came in and made me forget all the psychosis, but the...
    DeludedRecovery DeludedRecovery
    31-35, F
    Feb 11, 2014

    I Always Knew I Was Different.

    My life is in chaos as we speak. I do have schizoaffective disorder but I am on meds and they do help. My problem besides my disorder that turns me in to a lonely weirdo is that my dear mother who always took care of me in despite of being a single mom has stage four breast...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    3 Responses Oct 19, 2013

    I had some traumatic childhood experiences.

    I am being bullyd for 20 years now. Since like 25 I started to notice these voices talking to me. At first they tried just somehow contact me. I denied that for like 2 years. Thinking it's just skitzophremia and ignored the voices. Like 3 years ago they came back bullying me 24...
    QuakeTP QuakeTP
    26-30
    2 Responses Mar 19

    I had a serious relapse back in 2012,

    I fell because I had an impure fantasy......Lesson learned I wouldn't even dream of it ever again.....My schizophrenia has for the most part gone into remission....The worst part of it all was the 3+years of trauma and emotional pain that went with it, and I can finally say that...
    cutiepitunia cutiepitunia
    70+
    Mar 12
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