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I Have Schizophrenia

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 744 People

    I tell myself that the delusions I had were

    very short lived now that I have insight into my illness but really all I did was push them away. They're still in my head. Like I still feel like I've been trained to be a warrior my whole life, though for warfare on the nonphysical plane, not the physical. I'll do whatever I...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 8, 2015

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    Challenging experience,

    to say the least. Not the only thing I'm struggling with, too. But as Shaquille O'Neal AKA "The Big Aristotle" once said: "Life is a female dog.". Muhaha.
    AmIAMaleHSP AmIAMaleHSP 26-30, M 1 Response Dec 20, 2015

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    do you ever wish others to be schizophrenic

    for just 1 day or week? i do. so they could understand what it is we go through. so they would quit with their ignorant talk and quit using words like "schizo" as negative adjectives...jw
    mstenorsaxplayer mstenorsaxplayer 18-21, F 7 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    Celebrating John Nash.

    For those of you who do not know, John Nash died today. He was a mathmatician and and Nobel Prize winner who also suffered from paranoid schizophrenia. Just so happens that today is also Schizophrenia awareness day. The color for that is purple.
    mstenorsaxplayer mstenorsaxplayer 18-21, F May 24, 2015

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    guys, I am on medications

    for schizophrenia like risperidone,arapiprazole,trihexiphenedyl. all od.is there anyone else on any of these medications? has anyone any good or bad experience after leaving these drugs.? does the symptoms come back or aggravate after leaving these medications.! please respond...
    futurefather futurefather 26-30, M 6 Responses Oct 2, 2015

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    "As you will be inhabiting the body of a female

    human, you may or may not draw attention from male humans seeking to mate. It is recommended to refrain from such relations with human beings while on earth. Behaviors of an interested male may include such things as prolonged eye contact, excessive smiling or touching, verbal...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 24, 2015

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    He won't leave me alone.

    That voice. Calling me horrible names that make me cry all night. One time I was sitting with this girl who I thought was my friend- she laughs at me all the time and calls me the same names that voice calls me. It's like no one can ever understand.
    BloodOnIce BloodOnIce 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 11, 2014

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    Murmurs

    My case of schizophrenia is mild. I'm grateful that I don't have it as bad as some people. I don't know about other people but I don't hear voices too clearly. When things are quiet and I really pay attention, I can hear them. They are just faint murmurs in the background, like...
    AltF4 AltF4 22-25, M 2 Responses Sep 29, 2013

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    I'm usually pretty open about my mental illness,

    but because I am well spoken and clean up pretty nice (Thanks to my loving family and friends) it's harder to see how bad im struggling inside. like when I say things like I can't take pictures, people take it more as a suggestion instead of how I'm really feeling which is I'd...
    DarkKnightRanger DarkKnightRanger 26-30, M Nov 13, 2015

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    my dreams redefine weird I had this dream

    once in which I Beyonce was a magical queen who built a giant silk building in which she placed millions of kittens and everybody had to play with them or they are screwed when I woke up I decided to change it for my horror story plot and replaced the silk building with a creepy...
    Fralicious Fralicious 16-17, F Nov 29, 2015

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    Just Need To Vent

    I was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was 18. What was supposed to be the best time of my life was a nightmare I'll never be able to forget. The nightmare continues now into my twenties, and I see how this horrible disease has affected me mentally, emotionally, and...
    mkayx13 mkayx13 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 30, 2013

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    I decided to ignore the scratching inside the

    bed but it's still there. Taunting me....
    VeniceTheFree VeniceTheFree 31-35, F 5 Responses Jan 14, 2015

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    I have had three main voices.

    darkness: pure evil and commanding. manipulater: manipulating and is a critic. joe: comical and amusing. but recently I heard screaming and laughter and I didn't know what it was but two days ago I found out. joe has been murdered by a woman called ira:angry, dark and envious...
    slider978 slider978 13-15, F 4 Responses Oct 2, 2015

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    Schizophrenia:the Most Complex People In The World

    Firstly,I would like to say I am not ashamed. I am not ashamed because I believe having paranoid thoughs,ideas,imaginations does not make me a crazy. Society think they work on a one way street,but let me tell you that's not the case. Life is a limitless directional intersect...
    decasanova1 decasanova1 22-25, M 7 Responses May 5, 2011

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    I've been hearing voices on

    and off since I turned fourteen, but it wasn't until my sophomore year of college that these auditory hallucinations became incessant and overwhelming. Usually the voices will belong to unidentifiable individuals of varying identity (years of psychiatric treatment and...
    tatianya tatianya 26-30, F 20 Responses May 9, 2015

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    I want a girlfriend who also has schizophrenia.

    That way we can both understand and be there for each other. That'd be nice.
    TNDO95 TNDO95 18-21, M 5 Responses Dec 11, 2014

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    Controversial Treatments

    I've read a few articles and have had people tell me to stop trust in God because he doesn't answer prayers. I found that God does always answer prayers, maybe not the way we want or even with the answer we want, but he does answer. Yes,no,or wait awhile. We will overcome by the...
    mstenorsaxplayer mstenorsaxplayer 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 21, 2012

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    Do you ever feel like people pushed you into

    this direction? Have you ever felt shut down when inquiring about a peculiar topic? Do you feel like you can transmit thoughts with a little white noise? Do you remember what you have forgotten? This is injustice.
    icanhasover9000 icanhasover9000 22-25, M 2 Responses Aug 27, 2015

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    How I came to have schizophrenia was

    when I chose to start using meth. At first I thought I was being stalked because they would imitate voices of people I knew so for a good while I spent most of my time running from place to place of family and friends trying to escape them not knowing nobody else can hear them...
    Threat2theEnemy Threat2theEnemy 26-30, T Oct 12, 2015

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    I believe that in some ways,

    a mild case of schizophrenia are no weakness, but might be the gate to a varied way of thinking, newer forms of realizations. I don't believe that the world makes the sense of reality we humans experience – I believe our brains puts it all together to create a world in which...
    Fable Fable 22-25 1 Response Nov 4, 2015

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    This past Wednesday I was taken to the ER by my

    counselor on account of a severe bout of voices that constituted what psychiatrists term a psychotic episode. Unrelentingly for nearly a week I fell victim to auditory hallucinations that proclaimed without doubt that I deserved to die, and then went on to give me specific...
    tatianya tatianya 26-30, F 8 Responses Jun 7, 2015

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    I got diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia in

    1980 when I was 19 years old. I have got treated with medication, therapy, vocational programs. and multiple hospitalizations. I didn't have many dreams of a life after I got out of high school. Maybe just a vague feeling that I would like to have a good job and be rich and...
    555calif 555calif 51-55, M 5 Responses Oct 11, 2014

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    Dang it!! The things I experience vanish from

    my memory like dreams. I was in a room lit dimly by candle light. It was stone. Damp stone, looked like some sort of dungeon. And I was on my back on another stupid canopy bed and HE is over me, that same dark entity, and I feel his hands around my throat and while his hands...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F Nov 21, 2015

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    anyone else get annoyed

    when people think people with schizophrenia are all murderers and need to be locked up? Or when they think we are demon possessed?
    mstenorsaxplayer mstenorsaxplayer 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 7, 2014

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    and am finding out in short order how much

    strength is associated and required, this damn illness hurts. I'm also a veteran and know a trick or two. I once thought that medication was nothing more than chemical restraint. Please, listen, this is an illness and can be treated as such. Yeah, maybe meds. Doesn't what you're...
    cavedweller2 cavedweller2 36-40, F Apr 14, 2015

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    Current delusion my brain is trying to insist I

    believe: I am a jinn. I'm here for whatever reason. I was being chased/held captive by a different jinn for whatever reason and that may be part of the reason why I'm here now. The bad jinn might have caught me because I'm very powerful and they wanted to convert me to be bad...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 28, 2015

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    You know it hurts when you try to befriend

    someone and help them out, they block you with no reason or question... w/e though right?...well not right, it makes you not want to help someone in the future...
    DarkKnightRanger DarkKnightRanger 26-30, M 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    Screw everyone. I'm not sick.

    I function fine. I function fine!! I have a 3.7 gpa! I go to college full time!! I have plenty of close friends. I handle all of my own affairs. I can take care of myself perfectly well but everyone insists that I'm "ill" and "need to be medicated" just because I experience the...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F 4 Responses Oct 21, 2014

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    How am I going to live like this the rest of my

    life? Sure I have an amazing support system, which really helps, I don't ever want to sound like I am taking them for granted...but the internal struggle (especially lately) gets to be a lot. I can't handle nights like the last two were all I want to do is make my arms bleed...
    thereisnothingwrongwithyou thereisnothingwrongwithyou 22-25, F 2 Responses Dec 7, 2015

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    What is the point of trying to fight the

    insanity? Why not let myself fly off the deep end? Would that not be easier than trying to white knuckle it all the time? Is it fear of being called "crazy?" Who cares at this point. Is it fear of failing? I feel like I already am anyway. So again why am I trying so hard?
    thereisnothingwrongwithyou thereisnothingwrongwithyou 22-25, F 2 Responses Dec 7, 2015

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    What if that angel was right

    and it was a real good angel and I'm supposed to have some special baby that's going to do great things? Then wouldn't the devil want me to THINK that I was going to have an evil baby and that he was behind it, and then ruin sex for me so I would never have this baby? Ohhh I'm...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 31, 2015

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    I'm so angry. I'm so very,

    very angry. EVERYTHING has been irritating me. Everything. Things that wouldn't normally. Any time I hear someone eat I want to punch them in the face. Any time someone tries talking to me I want to scream. Any time I'm in close proximity to another person I get incredibly...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 20, 2015

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    does anyone like me feel the doctors made a

    mistake? i am not sick anymore. i just take my meds everyday to be safe. it's all related to sleep deprivation, weed, and being shy. to fix it you got to be as healthy as you can be. diet exercise water sleep staying clean. i do want to get on with my life but am on welfare and...
    techtabtips techtabtips 31-35, M 1 Response Oct 17, 2015

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    when you're eating a piece of fruit

    and there's a bug in it and you say to yourself it's not real it's just my psychosis. then you take a bite...... **** IT WAS REAL!!!
    slider978 slider978 13-15, F Oct 7, 2015

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    I have overcome Schizophrenia!

    !! Who the SON SETS FREE IS FREE INDEED.....From the moment I fell when I was 19----The voices told me that I sold my soul! I was redeemed! I had just fallen, I walked around my house in a lost and dazzed and confused state, I noticed that all of my clocks had stopped, every one...
    SealedWithAKisss SealedWithAKisss 31-35, F 8 Responses Apr 9, 2014

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    i am 15 and I was in my room at about 1 in the

    morning and looked over to the wall and there was a massive blood red dragons head there. it took me about an hour to get read of my fear and slowly walk over to it (after running back lots of times) shaking. I switched on the light but as I did it bit me and then I felt blood...
    slider978 slider978 13-15, F 1 Response Sep 17, 2015

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    Everywhere I go I hear people talking about me.

    I know its probably just my schizophrenia but it still bothers me. Does anyone else have the same problem?
    redbeefsteaktomato redbeefsteaktomato 36-40 5 Responses Jul 23, 2015

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    My Inhuman Aberration, My Story.

    I joined experience project in hopes to find and meet people with schizophrenia. My reasoning for that is I come from a small town and feel rather isolated. I have been living with paranoid schizophrenia for a few years now. About 5 to be exact.....that's just diagnosed. I was...
    ksenger ksenger 31-35, F 4 Responses Apr 30, 2013

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    I'm not even twenty yet.

    My life had just begun. I don't know when the symptoms started, but it caused my life to spiral right down the drain. I never went to a doctor, for fear of what they'd say. I want to work in law enforcement, but if I am officially diagnosed then what? I'd probably kill myself. I...
    SeeingIsNotBelieving SeeingIsNotBelieving 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 1, 2015

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    I'm thankful I got on medicine early.

    ..my symptoms...well. the positive symptoms are taken care of pretty well, but I remember when the illness was more tangible.. I remember fighting for dear life trying not to be drug in to hell...literally saw the castles of skulls, dragons and everything. anyone else experience...
    DarkKnightRanger DarkKnightRanger 26-30, M 1 Response Nov 13, 2015

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    Noiseless: Indepth Sz

    All my past storys have been from when my S/S started and until I was diagnosed. But I hadnt got to indepth about my SZ or the S/S I have from my SZ. Thats what im going to write about today. My schizophrenia changes frequently lately, or atleast the people I see do. Normally it...
    noiseless noiseless 18-21, F 5 Responses Sep 27, 2012

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    Paranoid Schizophrenia

    I was first hospitalized in a psych ward in 1980. After a week and a half I was released and from there was put in a house for schizophrenics. I was 19 years old. It was called Soteria House and was a world famous experiment where they didn't believe in medication and none of the...
    555calif 555calif 51-55, M 8 Responses Sep 4, 2010

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    so today I found out

    why my best friend won't speak or meet up with me anymore. it's because she thinks I am dangerous and doesn't want me hanging around her kids. the stigma of schizophrenia is terrible! I mean I am more likely to be dangerous to myself than anyone else.
    slider978 slider978 13-15, F 2 Responses Sep 19, 2015

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    Yeah so whenever my psychosis is active it

    starts twisting my interpretations of interactions with people and suddenly it feels like no one likes me. It's completely false but it just makes me feel like my friends don't care about me and like I'm worthless, and I perceive every interaction as negative. It's just nuts.
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 31, 2015

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    I remember the first time she spoke to me,

    didn't say much, but it was the best thing anyone had ever said to me. It was my d-day, what started all of the time spent in the ER and rez. The ghosts were screaming, loud as could be, and they had to be let out, but I couldn't. I was in school, no relief allowed in that hell...
    ouroboros0 ouroboros0 18-21, M Jan 28

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