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I Have Such Sick Humor But Find This Hilarious

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 49 People

    Shortest Lists

    What are the shortest Lists in the world?Black Olympic swimmersJewish athletesIrish **** starsFrench war heros
    Stevenomurph Stevenomurph 36-40, M Jul 8, 2013

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    Just Desserts

    I had a friend who went to the doctor with a strawberry stuck uyp his bum.  When he told the doctor he was quite surprised and said he had some cream for that.................
    GemmaRavenBird GemmaRavenBird 41-45, F 3 Responses Apr 25, 2010

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    Midget World Record!

    (IMPORTANT NOTE! .....Let's say that the person you tell this joke to is named John smith.) Three midgets decided they each wanted to beat a world record. The first midget wanted to have the world record for worlds smallest hands. The second midget wanted the world record for...
    carlee1212 carlee1212 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 7, 2012

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    Another Joke....

    Whats the difference between the starship enterprise and a piece of toilet tissue?  Nothing, because they both circe around uranus looking for clingons.....
    GemmaRavenBird GemmaRavenBird 41-45, F 4 Responses Apr 22, 2010

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    Related Experiences

    (Part 4) -3 months later- On the first month I had a buffet twice every two weeks, a stuffing dinner every three days, and a shopping trip once a month, measurements at the end...
    amanda369 amanda369 18-21, F 1 hr ago

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    A world without humor is a dark place, you have relax and enjoy the little fun things in life, and try and see the funny side of things! A great sense of humor is important and can...
    CuriousGuy833 CuriousGuy833 22-25, M 1 hr ago

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    I want to find true love... The kind of love that is unconditional, patient, and kind. The kind of love where you can be yourself, with no make up, where you haven't showered, are...
    anhonestgirl anhonestgirl 26-30, F 1 Response 21 hrs ago

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    Too many people mistake sympathy for empathy. People like me who have suffered don't care for your sympathy, we want empathy, we want you to understand. Faux sympathy isn't needed...
    usernameinneed usernameinneed 26-30, M 1 day ago

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    I had a full hysterectomy two years ago at the age of 29 without ever having the opportunity to have children. I have been sick ever since. I was told the surgery would change my...
    Genergy84 Genergy84 31-35, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I am an 18years old girl. I love being independent . I love to socialise and meet different people. I like hanging out with friends . I like talking on phone and I like social...
    joxyz joxyz 18-21, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Happy first day on EP! You are all so very kind :) xo
    babydarlingdollfacehoney babydarlingdollfacehoney 22-25, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Here's another picture. of my friend's belly button. She was playing with it, fingering it with lotion inside it. It's so deep, half of her finger disappears!
    myokujiraiya10 myokujiraiya10 18-21, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I cannot get over the hurt that my husband caused me over three months ago. I am in therapy and doing all the reading etc. I can, but I cannot seem to let go of what happened and...
    Patilud Patilud 51-55, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Good for driving it home when she's on top
    WarmMilk4Me WarmMilk4Me 36-40, M 4 days ago

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    I am in my late 20's and do not know how to date. I've been in 2 relationships, one which lasted almost 6 years. I guess with this experience, technically I still don't know how to...
    sweetiepoo sweetiepoo 26-30, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Thank God I have an innie because I like to wear a lot of bikinis during the summer. My cousin has an outie and its very distracting.
    ChelseaMonroe ChelseaMonroe 26-30, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Is it grace or is it Saturday law and Sabbath keeping??? Here is the side that clearly explains grace: Regarding Saturday or Sunday worship, I found the following. So many of...
    HeavenKnowsWhatComesOverMe HeavenKnowsWhatComesOverMe 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    when I trip on nothing. just casually walking then suddenly trip cause I wasnt paying enough Attention to controlling my legs. everybody gets a good laugh out of it, i just hate...
    muradgh muradgh 18-21, M 5 days ago

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    I find it funny when my husband tells me to overlook the faults of his mom or sister .He thinks I should be polite to them whayever happens.Well,I am not a saint and I won't...
    whitesunshine87 whitesunshine87 51-55, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=ab6_1323969907 this earth waste  nothing
    miimii0069 miimii0069 26-30, F 6 days ago

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    They say You dont understand. And me says explain. And they say fok you. And me says ok when. And they see my trap. But deny chat. And still suffer. Because they...
    Converted Converted 46-50, M 6 days ago

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    They say. You dont know me. But me knows the mood And the behavior. And they aint the first To say and do what they did. Lmao.
    Converted Converted 46-50, M 6 days ago

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    I find one big drawback of this huge state is that everything is sooooooooo far away from each other. ...like I have to drive 15 mins in one direction to one parlour and then 35...
    Aryg Aryg 36-40, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    Walking around in nature. I could walk forever. In this national park that I find myself in, like so many hikes I've done before but, this one is different. I'm alone as I walk and...
    Sometimesilence Sometimesilence 18-21, F a week ago

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    have you ever wondered how funny it looks when its been raining for a while and you find people walking on the streets with their umbrella's and it stops raining ... the people...
    amazingmike amazingmike 26-30, M a week ago

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    My belly button is an ovular innie and it is pretty deep.
    cherrychelle cherrychelle 13-15, F 1 Response a week ago

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    So after Turkey decides to essentially attack a gay pride even of it's own people, there is no public outcry, infact you don't have to look far to find Turkish people suggesting...
    Fabulousboy91 Fabulousboy91 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 28

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    I have a great sense of humor. but I'm not loud and obnoxious the way you expect a "funny person" to be so a lot of the time it's lost on people. I've been called "rude" a lot also...
    ZenaMarie ZenaMarie 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 27

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    Big Butt in Snug GirlieBlue Jeans I have a really big butt, one that bulges over the plump colomns of my chubby thighs and what brings out my plump bottom better than a snug pair...
    BlueJeanedPrincess BlueJeanedPrincess 56-60, F 2 Responses Jun 26

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    My belly button is so ticklish and i love it. I let some guy tickle my belly button over the weekend when i was in Montana and he bought me a new purse. Sorry it's been a while...
    delightful18 delightful18 18-21, F 9 Responses Jun 25

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    I am recently seperated and met a man 2 months ago and since 5 weeks ago, we have practically learnt EVERYTHING about each other. We have become so, so close but with no inimacy...
    BONBEACHER BONBEACHER 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 24

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    Whenever I'm in the car, I have to press my teeth shut or push my tongue to the side where the roads leading off the road we're on are going. I press it down as we pass by the...
    0emma0 0emma0 13-15, F Jun 23

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    I look back, and my past seems to be the fantasy of long forgotten dreams – the people in it, unlikely to be real, at times, it breaks my heart to know they're still there. How I...
    Fable Fable 22-25, F Jun 23

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    I have an innie and its circle shaped...
    Nya25 Nya25 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 23

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    http://ktla.com/2015/06/22/childs-remains-found-in-moms-car-10-years-after-he-was-last-seen/
    miimii0069 miimii0069 26-30, F 1 Response Jun 23

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    Ok, for a while now for about 10 months i have been feeling the sensation of bugs crawling all over my body. From the moment it started till now i've had to hide these sensations...
    sparksofinsanity sparksofinsanity 13-15, F Jun 22

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    I'm going to be honest here and say that I'm not entirely sure if what I'm about to post fits most appropriately under this title. so if you are reading this and think it would fit...
    foremmma foremmma 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 22

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    A- Why did you get DIVORCED? B- Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to...
    Jzzmine Jzzmine 18-21, F Jun 21

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    My wife is Chinese and her smile is one of the cutest
    speedaway speedaway 46-50, M Jun 20

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    My dad is such a child. He's been moody ever since I didn't want to go to lunch with him. Hey guess what, turns out I'm busy and didn't want to eat sandwiches either. And now he...
    PinkMellow PinkMellow 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 20

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    any girl would like to have fun with my bellybutton?? pls message me :)
    bellypunishment bellypunishment 22-25, M Jun 20

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