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I Have Such Sick Humor But Find This Hilarious

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 51 People

    Just Desserts

    I had a friend who went to the doctor with a strawberry stuck uyp his bum.  When he told the doctor he was quite surprised and said he had some cream for that.................
    GemmaRavenBird GemmaRavenBird 41-45, F 3 Responses Apr 25, 2010

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    Midget World Record!

    (IMPORTANT NOTE! .....Let's say that the person you tell this joke to is named John smith.) Three midgets decided they each wanted to beat a world record. The first midget wanted to have the world record for worlds smallest hands. The second midget wanted the world record for...
    carlee1212 carlee1212 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 7, 2012

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    Shortest Lists

    What are the shortest Lists in the world?Black Olympic swimmersJewish athletesIrish **** starsFrench war heros
    Stevenomurph Stevenomurph 36-40, M Jul 8, 2013

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    Another Joke....

    Whats the difference between the starship enterprise and a piece of toilet tissue?  Nothing, because they both circe around uranus looking for clingons.....
    GemmaRavenBird GemmaRavenBird 41-45, F 4 Responses Apr 22, 2010

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    Related Experiences

    Well they're good friends of mine (I already have a best friend), but they can be so dumb sometimes.. Especially one. They fought and stopped being friends for months just because...
    littlestella littlestella 18-21, F Jul 9

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    Yes, I have plenty of horny, naughty stuff in my profile; however, that is only part of me and my experiences. I am hear to be real. That includes my twisted side as well as my...
    MadcoBiker MadcoBiker 41-45, M 1 day ago

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    I just wish I had someone, to talk to. Anyone. Somebody who cares. I sound like a loser,maybe because I am. But I really kinda,wish I had an online boyfriend to talk to,to ask him...
    TheQueen2809 TheQueen2809 16-17, F 6 Responses Jun 27

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    Haven't posted here in a while. After spending 2 years in a nursing home my wife passed in March of 2013. Little over a year ago already. I think I was lucky to have had so much...
    French378 French378 51-55, M Jul 2

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    I love it when it rains, but to think that some low area here in my place like downtown will be possible for floods due to heavy rain I'm beginning to be sad... It's raining now...
    smjuap21 smjuap21 22-25, F Jul 15

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    So it was me and Ingrid since 3rd grade ! Then in 4th grade Vincent came he is such a bad boy !! Vincent sat next to me and started to bother me so I told myself "I need to get...
    bela5562 bela5562 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 9

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    So I have a friend who I've known for about 3 and a half years now. I've had feelings for her for quite some time, the thing is she was married when I first met her. She is...
    Twitch313 Twitch313 26-30, M 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    My compulsion is skin picking usually connected to OCD but not in mine. People yell at me to stop friends pry my hands apart, the spa ladies giving me a pedicure scowl at my...
    naturalnobody naturalnobody 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 28

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    My wife has an innie button too!:)
    Eclipse7 Eclipse7 26-30, M 2 Responses Jun 28

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    I'm always aroused no matter what. I use to jack every night!! I haven't jacked in a full week and it's killing me. Last nigh I was soooo close to doing it but I just flipped on my...
    PrinceAkeem PrinceAkeem 16-17, M Jul 6

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    Recently, most of my fat has gone to my butt, really swelling it up, as my butt inflates with fat, it feels bigger and bigger every day, as it becomes heavier and heavier, swelling...
    FatExplodingBelly FatExplodingBelly 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 9

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    I had a best friend. We started talkin to two other best friends and became a group of 4. But my best friend started hating one of my other friends and would always leave and get...
    HarlieMarie HarlieMarie 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 9

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    I lay in bed everynight touching and poking my soft deep innie and touching the core of it. Its got what feels like little bumps way down inside. I push on it until it hurts. I...
    Viciouspistols Viciouspistols 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 15

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    My belly button is an innie and furry too
    craftyman craftyman 46-50, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    I read the posts and wonder who you really are behind that mask of anonymity, be it actress, sportsman, funeral director, nurse, politician, housewife, priest, whatever, it doesn't...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I joined this website a long while back because I was going through a very bad time, I was depressed, suicidal and lost. My life has changed now and I still feel funny. I had...
    doctorwhofan doctorwhofan 22-25, F 6 days ago

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    Seriously over five thousand people have an innie. It's like something of 90% of the population have one. Don't get me wrong I love them all but us outies get lonely
    mlcockrell mlcockrell 36-40, M 6 days ago

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    This is me sucking a **** and have a ***** to
    dich dich 18-21, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    My wife's fibromyalgia has virtually destroyed her life and turned me into a full time caretaker at 41. So truly difficult!
    Jacob1972 Jacob1972 41-45, M 2 Responses Jul 2

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    Everything especially relationships always seem to mean more to me than to the other person.
    justbrokenxoxo justbrokenxoxo 18-21, F Jul 10

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    I am a very successfull, mannered and likeable personality with secret compulsions, obsessions and habits that hamper my life.
    iObComp iObComp 26-30, M Jun 28

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    I can fit a quarter in with ease. XD
    Heartsu Heartsu 26-30, F 6 Responses Jul 1

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    Anyone up to rp and tickle and play with my bellybutton?
    kaylabaabe kaylabaabe 18-21, F 6 Responses Jul 4

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    Is anyone even on now. Someone entertain me
    onlylogan onlylogan 16-17, F 6 days ago

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    The girl I like went to her home country for a whole month and I missed her so much ,I didn't realize how much I really liked her until we were apart ,she's coming home next week I...
    Life8227 Life8227 16-17, F 2 days ago

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    UK SUFFERERS - PLEASE GET IN CONTACT! So, I've never really wanted to write my story. Not because I am afraid or ashamed, but because I am so bored of talking about it, it makes...
    scharx scharx 18-21 Jul 1

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    UK SUFFERERS - PLEASE GET IN CONTACT! So, I've never really wanted to write my story. Not because I am afraid or ashamed, but because I am so bored of talking about it, it makes...
    scharx scharx 18-21 1 Response Jul 1

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    My father hates Time Warner. He complains about them practically every chance he gets, which I find hilarious. Just now, I saw that he was on Facebook, so I messaged him "HERE AT...
    jahein137 jahein137 18-21, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    I'm the oldest child in my family, 32 years old now. As long as I can remember I have always felt abnormal, and could never understand how my friends were able to be sole...
    ladybutterfly82 ladybutterfly82 31-35, F Jun 29

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    I am 23 and I find it so hard to find a guy who likes me and also I find it just as hard to maintain a healthy relationship. I have BPD and also Depression. On top of that I am...
    InsertYourLoveHere InsertYourLoveHere 22-25, F 5 Responses Jul 7

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    I am 25 and when I found out I was pregnant, I cried, full of despair and fear. I instantly new what I had to do and instantly realised that I would never get to know my baby, that...
    parislondonrome parislondonrome 22-25, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I have Cellulite. I have such a big issue with my own body at this moment! I hate my body because of my Cellulite. I am a small girl; I’m 1.51m and weigh 46kg. I don’t have bad...
    Sarbrina Sarbrina 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 8

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    I'm really tired! I have such dreams I wish I can be myself without being afraid of disappointed my family, I wish they would love me for who I am and not who they want me to be! I...
    catxfreak catxfreak 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    I have a vague idea. I love intelligence and a good sense of humor. But beyond that and a love for video games, I have no specific sense of what I want. I like both long and short...
    jsshado jsshado 18-21, M Jul 2

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    Hey guys, it's past midnight over here and I've been trying to fall asleep but I got stuck reading posts, articles, etc. of HPV. I'm only 20 and not even two weeks ago I received...
    sunny1993 sunny1993 18-21, F 3 Responses Jul 7

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    I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to forgive her. Ate first, when I met her, I thought for sure that I wouldn't have typical awful MIL; but I was wrong. Her snide comments and...
    cfern823 cfern823 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 15

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    I really hate being sick. I have been sick since Thursday night. The other night I was rushed to ER they gave a shot and some antibiotics. To yesterday afternoon I was on EP...
    SummerLove16 SummerLove16 16-17, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I don't get sick often but when I do it's like another war raging on inside my body
    Life8227 Life8227 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 14

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    I'm 29, married in sexless marriage. We do have a great relationship but our intimacy went down the hill. Im starving for affection. I have always liked girls, had brief...
    lifetails lifetails 26-30, F 3 days ago

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    I'm a musician, I have such a passion for music, I just find it so beautiful. Any musicians with the same passion out there?
    missylawl missylawl 16-17, F Jun 25

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    My Mother, simply put, is the meanest, angriest, most unpleasant person I know. She is a mentally ill psychotic, a tyrant, and a bully all rolled into one. My parents split up when...
    wishiwasabrady wishiwasabrady 41-45, M 1 Response Jun 29

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    I just have that sick feeling that I won't have a good future, as in I won't have my own house or car because I won't have a job. I hope I get a good job and select a career right...
    Mockingjay96hehe Mockingjay96hehe 18-21, F a week ago

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    As of today I have officially given up on love and I really don't care anymore I tried pursuing relationships constant rejection I don't even care if I get married anymore I don't...
    SeanWarnerB SeanWarnerB 18-21, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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