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I Have Such Sick Humor But Find This Hilarious

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 49 People

    Just Desserts

    I had a friend who went to the doctor with a strawberry stuck uyp his bum.  When he told the doctor he was quite surprised and said he had some cream for that.................
    GemmaRavenBird GemmaRavenBird 41-45, F 3 Responses Apr 25, 2010

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    Midget World Record!

    (IMPORTANT NOTE! .....Let's say that the person you tell this joke to is named John smith.) Three midgets decided they each wanted to beat a world record. The first midget wanted to have the world record for worlds smallest hands. The second midget wanted the world record for...
    carlee1212 carlee1212 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 7, 2012

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    Another Joke....

    Whats the difference between the starship enterprise and a piece of toilet tissue?  Nothing, because they both circe around uranus looking for clingons.....
    GemmaRavenBird GemmaRavenBird 41-45, F 4 Responses Apr 22, 2010

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    Shortest Lists

    What are the shortest Lists in the world?Black Olympic swimmersJewish athletesIrish **** starsFrench war heros
    Stevenomurph Stevenomurph 36-40, M Jul 8, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    It's been 8 months of my husband's coughing, and we are finally going through a series of tests at the University today. Hopefully we will finally get some answers. Even though my...
    N6135P N6135P 61-65, F May 12

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    My grandma or gran as I call her is very sick. She is paralyzed from the neck down, she can't speak, is tube fed, has a trach, and is on a ventilator. She communicates with us by...
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 12

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    When I die, I hope I have enough time to point at a complete stranger and whisper "You did this."
    Thevy29 Thevy29 31-35, M 2 Responses May 5

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    I'm 44 years old with a 4 year old and a 2 year old and I know I'll never be able to find love. All the men my age don't want little kids when they've already gotten their kids out...
    lucismom lucismom 41-45, F 2 Responses May 12

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    I make appreciating life lessons a priority. Each day brings something new to be learned, or something old to be reflected upon with a new view. It is up to us to take all things...
    FoolOfATook FoolOfATook 16-17 1 Response May 13

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    If you're in Northern New Jersey and have a high degree of empathy, join my meetup group. Http://meetup.com/NNJ-Empathy-Meetup/ We already have over 40 members. Our next Meetup...
    Roxvox Roxvox 31-35, F May 23

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    I was hiking with my friends when I was in high school and one of them got really tired and asked for one of us to give her a piggyback ride. I offered and she got on my back...
    bbcjsv bbcjsv 26-30, F May 25

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    I used to be very fit and recently have been growing a pudgy little belly. But some weight has been going to my thighs and butt making them jiggly and they have a little bit of...
    chubbybellyguy69 chubbybellyguy69 18-21, M 6 days ago

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    “You Were Never Really Mine To Begin With” When you simply live your life in a way that makes you happy, it would never as necessary to actually care about what’s going to...
    AeonFlux21 AeonFlux21 22-25, F 1 Response May 5

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    I'm not sure how weird this story will be or not but i discovered that my belly button is very ticklish. I was at this party and i was wearing a saree which showed quite a bit of...
    riririya riririya 16-17, F May 7

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    I like outties as well but i can't stand to see when women have their belly pierced and their naval is an outtie,it's not cute.
    Caribbeanbeauty93 Caribbeanbeauty93 22-25, F 3 Responses May 8

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    I read somewhere that the most colorful girls/people have the darkest soul/mind (that is not the exact quote :p) and I guess it rings true to me
    lindamerja lindamerja 26-30, F May 13

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    I have an innie but I can pop it out by squeezing it hehe ??
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses May 18

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    This is my outie belly button. What do you think of it?
    stutayl stutayl 18-21, M 1 Response May 19

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    My outie swirly belly button. It can be pulled out a long way.
    stutayl stutayl 18-21, M May 19

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    Today kind of sucked. But I'm sure things will seem better in the morning
    PraiseBeToYevon PraiseBeToYevon 31-35, F 8 Responses May 21

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    my skin never feels clean to me and i always feel absolutely disgusting. i spend about half an hour looking at the mirror at least a couple times a day, just trying to get the dirt...
    gemmed gemmed 13-15, F May 22

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    well i got into a very big fight with my mother in law, this time it was not good at all, she said that i made her heart ache and that i was going to pay for this, well it turned...
    mrsOrochester mrsOrochester 31-35, F 2 Responses May 24

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    i keep waiting for tomorrow to be better. but it never does.
    CallmeHopelessNotRomantic CallmeHopelessNotRomantic 36-40, F 1 Response May 24

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    okay I do have good days, reasonable days, days that I cope with with ease. but the underlying problems and unhappiness are still there throughout these days and I want that to...
    minmins07 minmins07 18-21, F May 24

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    From some infection, presumeably maybe an cat or other animal.First it was reddish, then it later become all puss filled, and sometimes would erupt, .. My class mates would call it...
    mirkwood86 mirkwood86 26-30, M May 25

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    I have an amazing family who would give the world for me. I have friends I love. I graduated this month with my masters degree. I was accepted into the PhD program I applied to...
    skatinem13 skatinem13 26-30, F May 25

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    This is just to clarify on what my belly button looks like
    jingaling14 jingaling14 18-21, F 6 Responses a week ago

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    Well its not big but everyone in school says "omg I love your butt its so small round and fat" lol they're like I want your body!
    amazinghuh amazinghuh 13-15, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    Stupid sometimes... Like you'll be searching and searching for a sensible solution and there's no solution because society is f*cked. And then all you can do is laugh. Its kinda...
    thinkdeeper thinkdeeper 22-25, M May 19

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    I'm 52 years old and I've been struggling all my life with my inability to make friends. I found an old diary today written when I was only 21. I had the same loneliness problems...
    Sunshine9001 Sunshine9001 51-55, F 3 Responses May 21

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    mine is an innie one. it looks like a hole except its not round its oval shapped
    alec2003 alec2003 18-21, M May 16

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    Law of averages - everyone gets bad days occasionally! Don't give in as there's always light at the end of a tunnel!
    PeterSp8 PeterSp8 41-45, M May 24

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    I fell off of my bike and landed on a pile of thorns
    cayleealderman cayleealderman 18-21, F May 24

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    yesterday was my moms birthday and I made prior plans for her to spend a day at the spa and dinner after that. i told her yesterday morning what I had planned to do and all that...
    ALifeInterupted ALifeInterupted 18-21, F May 25

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    It?s amazing how I look up into the stars, and you?re the first thing that comes into my mind.
    Kunal27 Kunal27 18-21, M May 25

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    Let me rephrase that fell off my bike into a pile of thorns now my *** hurts ya it's wonderful
    cayleealderman cayleealderman 18-21, F 1 Response May 25

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    I couldn't stand that one movie out of place. I had to fix it.
    goodwitch011070 goodwitch011070 41-45, F 2 days ago

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    Kickin’ Kratom I was proud of myself for turning down the Vicodin the doctor offered me for my injuries: carpal tunnel and torn rotator cuff that had become acutely aggravated...
    mariaweeks mariaweeks 46-50, F 20 hrs ago

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    Life is way too serious as it is. If you don't have a sense of humor, it's going to be pretty miserable. That's one of the main things that attracts me to a woman, her sense of...
    Elisb Elisb 61-65, M 1 Response May 15

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    I have had only one real job but in total I've had 2 jobs but moved around within the same job categories. I now work in Health Care, elderly care, I like it, but almost a year...
    LoveUnite LoveUnite 26-30, F May 11

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    Update in the comments. Ok need some help! I want you to tell me a truth, am I overreacting? Today is our 3 year dating anniversary (something H finds hilarious that I want to...
    KFallon92 KFallon92 22-25, F 7 Responses May 10

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    Its not humor but when im in a room full of people id always remain calm and literally make up a plan where id kill and takedown everyone in there, yeah im that weird lol.. Like...