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I Have Sucidal Feelings

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,088 People

    What's wrong with me?

    I know my heart is beating but I am numb. I don't feel alive and I can't shake it. I have bouts of depression, I think. I just don't feel a thing, I know why. I want to hear her voice, just one last time. I want to look into her piercing blue eyes, just one last time. I...
    SignalSarge SignalSarge 46-50, M Aug 5

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    i just for once i dont want thoughts

    or feelings in my head anymore
    elephant17 elephant17 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 21

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    So this isn't easy to say

    but I can't keep it inside anymore. I want to commit suicide, and I've had thoughts about it for a long time now. I'm 16 and I have told my mom, mentor and cousin. They say I need professional help but 3yrs later and still no help. I was thinking about committing it by the end...
    Jb359 Jb359 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 18

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    I Have That Feeling

    i dont know why but from my childhood i have suicidal feeling when i was a kid i often think how i kill myself and now i m a great suicidal most of the time i spend by thinking how i will kill myself when i m on any building i want to jump from there and when i saw any blade or...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Mar 10, 2010

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    Today I waited on the train tracks

    as the train was coming somebody pushed me out of the way ... :( Im sad I wish they would have let the train hit me.
    Hiimamyimdead Hiimamyimdead 18-21, F 7 Responses Jun 26

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    I Dream Of Ending It....

    Does the nervedamage show? .....Is the survival switch tripped?....How can I feel this way when there is nothing tangible to put my fingure on. Am I thus selfish thinking only of my own?....I am so tired feeling this way. I am obliged to carry on, only the thought of cutting...
    Gaspar1111 Gaspar1111 31-35, M 6 Responses Mar 29, 2010

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    I Do Too

    I have suicidal feelings and thoughts frequently. I have for years. I have survived one pathetic attempt many years ago that resulted in horrible feelings of failure and shame. It ended up being something I had to explain to my family It ended up a mess It ended making people a...
    mac885 mac885 56-60, F 2 Responses Mar 13, 2013

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F Jul 18

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    Down in it again... I hate to seek attention,

    but I'm trying to stay here... .45 or 12 gauge? What should I do to stop this suffocating feeling?
    PleasePegMe1 PleasePegMe1 36-40, M 2 Responses Aug 19

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    I'm getting closer. The feelings of despair

    and helplessness are getting louder and louder. Today I lost another Soldier I deployed with to suicide. I'm not sure how much more I can take.
    SignalSarge SignalSarge 46-50, M Aug 12

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    I just want to die. I had to delete my other ep

    account due to harassment. I was raped and I have flashbacks really bad. It makes me so frustrated. I feel like I have no where to turn. And I wouldn't mind if I didn't wake up tomorrow.
    Rayven1997 Rayven1997 16-17, F Aug 1

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    I was just discharged 2 days ago from a 5150

    hold. I had a change of mind while I at the hospital and felt so secure about trying to better myself and promised myself I would try to kill myself again, but I don't know what happened today,.... I want to just die and get these emotions over with
    ghetti24 ghetti24 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 15

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    My demons are taking over me again

    and I know this time I'm not going be able to fight them off.
    WhatsThePointInLifeAnymore WhatsThePointInLifeAnymore 16-17, M 2 Responses Aug 23

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 20

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    Three years ago I was sucidal.

    Everyone made fun of the way I looked and acted and bullshit. I had my ups and downs on relationships. All this made me a stronger person. I smile in front of people make everyone happy and I'll be happy . But when I'm alone I drive myself insane. I can't stand myself 😣 is...
    Melodyjr Melodyjr 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 26

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    I have since I was 14.

    Last week I overdosed on pills called my friend in a drunken stupor and next thing I know I'm locked in the psych ward for 2 days. The experience has not made the feelings go away. I'm so lonely and depressed I would like for it to all end because I don't know if I can wait too...
    CharmedAmour CharmedAmour 22-25, F 3 Responses May 7

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    I Wish I Dead Alot

    People always act like im not there.most of them ignore my questions.My Family hates me.    My mum when me and my brother fights tells me to get to my room and just leaves him alone.my mum has always loved my brother more and i tell.my dad moved cause he hated his life here...
    xxxunbrokenxxx xxxunbrokenxxx 16-17, F 2 Responses Feb 10, 2011

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    Sometimes I just feel like I should just kill

    myself. I have nothing to live for. I have no friends, no one that cares for me. I'm always alone and have no one to spend time with. I'm worthless. All I do is go to school and work. I never have anyone that shows they care or gives me attention. I'm always pushed to the side...
    Bitterrsweet Bitterrsweet 18-21, F 18 Responses May 25

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    When I was 12, a freak accident in a school

    yard left me with a hole in my skull and 27 stitches. I'm 31 now and in talking with a counselor, I've learned that I've blamed myself for this happening too me. At a young age I told myself, I was a bad kid and Karma got the best of me, I know that wasn't the case. I've...
    sb318w sb318w 31-35, M Jul 16

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    Tonight

    I don't really know how I feel. Sad? Depressed? Alone? Hurt? Does it even matter? I know I hate myself. I hate every inch of my body and every thought I have. I feel cowardly because I find myself at the edge but I just can't bring myself to go over. About half an hour ago I...
    Mintallyill Mintallyill 26-30 7 Responses Mar 11, 2013

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F Jul 15

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    I can't do this anymore!

    I have almost a full bottle of Xanax in my car and I'm seriously considering taking them all. Why not? It's not like anybody would miss me. Nobody really cares about me here or anywhere. I'm so sick of all of the **** that won't go away. This is potentially goodbye...
    drummergrl06 drummergrl06 26-30, F 7 Responses Jul 20

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    At 21 years of age, I'm just waiting

    until money becomes a concern and I'm out. I will wait until my sister graduates high school so she will have a better understanding. It feels as if I was born into a game I never wanted to play.
    PuckDrop PuckDrop 18-21, M 2 Responses Aug 18

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F Jul 14

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    I never thought I would be the person

    who attempted suicide... but I was wrong
    MADSOUNDS MADSOUNDS 13-15, F 3 Responses Aug 12

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    Every time I shower I full up the tub,

    lay down, and hold my breath. I've always known but never admitted to myself that I'm waiting for the time I don't come back up. I leave that as a daily option.
    marchz13 marchz13 16-17, F 2 Responses Aug 17

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    For the love of God!!

    Not to be mean or anything but if you want to end your life there is the internet! You don't need help googling suicide methods. There are sooo many websites. If you really wanted to die you would be dead. You don't have to come on here posting for methods and saying you want to...
    littlegirl03 littlegirl03 18-21, F Jul 22

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    "You told me think about it,

    well I did, now I don't want to feel a thing anymore, I'm tired of begging for the things that I want, I'm over sleeping like a dog on the floor. Imagine living like a king some day, a single night without a ghost in the wall, and if the bass shakes the earth underground, we'll...
    sm1ttay sm1ttay 16-17, M 1 Response Jun 22

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F Jul 16

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    But caring for pals strikes.

    And i stick around hoping for a cure.
    Livyn4pals Livyn4pals 46-50, M Aug 17

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    Killing oneself is, anyway,

    a misnomer. We don't kill ourselves. We are simply defeated by the long, hard struggle to stay alive. When somebody dies after a long illness, people are apt to say, with a note of approval, "He fought so hard." And they are inclined to think, about a suicide, that no fight was...
    Brokendreams24 Brokendreams24 16-17, F 3 Responses May 7

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F Jul 16

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    I am 14 years old, and I am coming to realize

    that me and my family's relationship is changing. My parents are more supportive towards my younger sibling than they were to me. It seems as though everything I do is wrong around them. Everything I do ticks them off. Why are they like this? They used to be different...
    Cheriko Cheriko 18-21, F Jun 15

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F 20 Responses Jul 5

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    I openly admitted to my GP today about it right

    in front of my mother not realising she was still there but she know feels really guilty but I dunno whether to be happy that I've finally told someone about it or scared because I'll be questioned upon it soon😭
    Daisyellenrose Daisyellenrose 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 4

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    What Should I Do?

    Sorry its a bit long,I am sorry if this sounds really depressing and cliché. My mum and me used to argue a lot, she said she wished she had an abortion and many other things, so i moved in with my dad, 2 years later he got into an argument with my mother and he hit her (knocking...
    myproblem1 myproblem1 16-17, F 4 Responses Oct 17, 2012

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    Imagine This

    Thinking about ending your life tonight? Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You've had yet another horrible day. You're just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you've written and rewritten over and over and...
    BlurredBeyondTheStarsx BlurredBeyondTheStarsx 70+ 2 Responses Nov 3, 2013

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    When I'm not distracted by something else I

    wanted to die almost all the time. Though it's unhealthy but my thoughts in methods of committing suicide are so bizarre sometimes. I don't think I'll ever do it nope, I've tried once and failed. But it's a part of me I can live with now.
    GrumpyMe GrumpyMe 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 2

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    My parents are talking about robin Williams

    suicide, they are both talking how f**ked up a person must be to commit or even think of it and how selfish they are and everything else they could think of along those lines! If only you knew their son(me) thinks of it every night! I personally think there f**ked up for not...
    sm1ttay sm1ttay 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 11

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    I've been dealing with a lot lately

    and I just want it to be over with
    chynoweth17 chynoweth17 13-15, F Aug 5

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    Everyday I look on the mirror an think how ugly

    I am and how I want to die. And how no day loves me. I look at the bridge that is in my town and think how much id like to jump.
    Hiimamyimdead Hiimamyimdead 18-21, F 4 Responses Jun 25

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    I've had suicidal thoughts

    and feelings for ages. I hate my life. I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. I want to end everything. I cant stand my life anymore. everyday is exactly the same. I sleep in, wake up, go on the computer, eat dinner alone in my room, I cut, and then I listen to depressing...
    silentgirl1234 silentgirl1234 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 9

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F Jul 18

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 15

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    Not In Control

    I've felt suicidal what seems like forever, but it's getting worse. The feeling to give up gets stronger and stronger every day. I recently went to my doctors he sent me to see a counsellor. It's not helping, the suicidal feels are getting worse. I don't know what to do. I don't...
    myproblem1 myproblem1 16-17, F 2 Responses Feb 3, 2013

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    My boyfriend told me loved me.

    He's 35 I'm 19. He told me my age doesn't matter. It did. He told me my skin color didn't matter. It did. He told me he would fight for our love. He didn't. Why? Why tell me this? For my body? But, why? There's plenty other girls. He knew he was my world. He knew he was my...
    ohwee12 ohwee12 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 29, 2013

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    It was never a thought

    but now suicide is a question
    Waterstorm Waterstorm 13-15, F Aug 10

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    No More...

    ..coz , now , I'm in love with my life. Its hard and everything., but, hey, whats life without different seasons of emotions???
    San051 San051 22-25, F 3 Responses Feb 10, 2011

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    What the hell is the point

    if no one loves me????
    GaleJake GaleJake 13-15, M 2 Responses Mar 17

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    I feel really sad. Like at this point i dont

    know what to do. I just want to jump out of my window.
    FindingHappinessx3 FindingHappinessx3 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 22

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    i let some ******* get under my skin

    so now im really upset and i asked my friends for help but no one is responding... i feel really alone right now and am only staying alive right now because im on vacation with my family and dont want my young cousins to see my body
    kinkykittymeow kinkykittymeow 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 18

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    So I'm putting this here cause I have the

    emotional ability too. I've been suicidal since 14, not so much anymore cause I've kinda learned to live with the feelings to an extent but I was on Zoloft and Prozac for a long time until I couldn't afford them anymore so I would go on and of them as they became affordable. So...
    Jak2395 Jak2395 18-21, M 1 Response Jun 16

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    kei83 kei83 13-15, F 8 Responses Jul 14

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    Grrrrrr

    I want to pack a backpack with everything i might possibly need ... not to miss a thing out. I don't want to get it wrong again .... i can't cope with getting it wrong AGAIN!!! The disappointment of not even being able to take your own life is overwhelming. I almost want to...
    deadinsideout deadinsideout 26-30, F 10 Responses