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I Have Thought About Suicde

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,285 People

    I have, and still do,

    but I will never do it, there's always something to look forward to. Surprises and curiosity are the reason why I'm still here, and I know that there are more to come
    DoorMattress DoorMattress 13-15, M 2 Responses Apr 24

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    You think you know me.

    .. But you don't know the first thing about me... You think you've been through depression... But you haven't... How long did it last?? Oh two weeks? That's cute!! Depression is ******* hell... You try to sympathize but the problems you face, would be close to the bottom of my...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M Mar 10

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    I have thought but decided

    that I would not give others the satisfaction of knowing their wrongdoings.
    BlossomTheMeganium BlossomTheMeganium 26-30, M Mar 22

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    lost my job, my partner,

    family is wrecked, friends dwindled. this all happened at the same time. I feel like I have nothing. just perpetually on my couch watching Netflix.
    techassassin techassassin 22-25, M 4 Responses Apr 20

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    I want to die... It's Christmas morning.

    .. And I want to die... How ****** up am I? Please just kill me
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 2 Responses Dec 25, 2014

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    Catho Catho 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 22

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    I have thought about ending it a few times,

    to check out and leave by my own terms. Sometimes it seemed like it was the only way I could control my life, that I could actually be the one who decides how my life should be. Existential questions, the search for an identity, the sometimes conflicting nature of what I wanted...
    Synapse81 Synapse81 31-35, M 1 Response Nov 11, 2014

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    Dear mother, I love you,

    I'm sorry I wasn't good enough. Dear father, forgive me, cause I'm your eyes I just never added up. It's a long and lonely road, when you know you walk alone. Dear brother, just don't hate me. For never standing by you, or being by your side. Dear sister, please don't blame me...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 3

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    Crap can just be overwhelming!

    So the thoughts are bound to happen. But I believe there's always a way out of that darkness. For me it was God and His Son My Lord Savior Jesus Christ. Still hard at times, but I deal and keep moving. No one said it was easy. Whether it's faith, religion, someone to talk...
    Salute2MyFlaws Salute2MyFlaws 18-21, F 4 Responses Sep 11, 2014

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    I'm so sad and so stressed

    and so lonely. I need something to keep my mind off of wanting to take it out on myself. I would never ever kill my self, I love life too much. I always keep on pushing but sometimes life sucks. I think more and more about relapsing everyday
    sslrd sslrd 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 21

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    How to sit with someone

    who is suicidal? Understand that their longing for death is really their longing for Home. This is a spiritual crisis, not merely a medical one. They are trying to awaken from a nightmare. By all means, call a doctor, obtain professional medical help, get them to a hospital...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Apr 13, 2014

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    i think about it everyday,

    if i just had the right tool ( the shotgun ) i'd probably would have done it long time ago. that's the way i wanna go ,quick and painless, shotgun to the head. easy way out. i'm as good as dead anyway even though i'm alive..somewhere along the way something big died inside me...
    antonelidatsmyname antonelidatsmyname 22-25, M 6 Responses Apr 20

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    sunflowerpet sunflowerpet 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 21

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    Woke up instantly feeling suicidal.

    .. What the **** is wrong with me?
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M Apr 22

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    4sh1ynn 4sh1ynn 13-15, F 26 Responses Jul 13, 2014

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    I hate life. I'm sick of crying,

    tired of trying, yes I know I'm smiling, but in the inside I'm dying. What is life? I mean the word itself has a big IF. IF I hurt myself, will anyone care? IF I die, would anyone cry? I would like to be treated like a normal person, not like a piece of trash. Hate is what...
    Isurvivedlife Isurvivedlife 13-15, F 7 Responses Apr 21

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    forceful digging fury in my mind is the sweat

    and fear worth my time one tiny shred of evidence will surly be the death of my innocence fly away free never feeling the consequences or stay and see the beauty that life possess the devil weaves a magical spell either way I'm left stuck inside a cell
    HotMessExpress101 HotMessExpress101 31-35, F 4 Responses Jan 30

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    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 12 Responses Mar 27

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    I've thought about it,

    but my grandmother always said it was the ultimate sin.
    dirtydarkness dirtydarkness 26-30, F 5 Responses Apr 20

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    i remebered when i was soo depressed

    that i actually thought about walking into traffic and letting myself get ran over by cars. my head was in such a dark place. i wouldint wish it on my worse enemy. i remember i couldint understand why ppl got depressed like cheer up? its just feelings?? but its much more than...
    Muffin19 Muffin19 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 20

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    A Step Too Close A few weeks ago I took a step

    that was too far. My life felt like it was falling apart all around me. My thoughts were haunting and the nightmares even more haunting. I didn't want to live the way I was living anymore. My mind made a choice that I will never forget. I decided it was okay to die and say...
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 28, 2014

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    Sometimes i feel like leaving my house

    and throwing myself off a bridge. I just wanted to say that and get it off my chest.
    jaylol jaylol 22-25, M 4 Responses Dec 20, 2014

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    You don't want to be here,

    and I don't... especially if you do go, I won't stick around... So why don't we go together? Like make a pact to die together..
    Catho Catho 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 29

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    Yep quite a lot. I have drunk bleach

    and overdosed on pills but I'm not yet dead. I was thinking about killing myself this summer but it cannot happen now because I have the eyes of my friends and family on me but i don't doubt the fact that I am still capable of doing it.
    littlecrazymia littlecrazymia 13-15, F 6 Responses Aug 12, 2014

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    My names amber and I have thought about suicide

    a lot. I have so many problems at home and school is really stressful. My parents don't understand how hard it could be to be a teenager, they think "you only go to school and back so why should you be tired?" But they don't understand how frustrating school is. My friends act...
    diamond104 diamond104 16-17, F 3 Responses Mar 16, 2014

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    Id like to fall asleep

    and never wake up again... Extra sleeping pills tonight? Maybe...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 1 Response Mar 15

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    :'(

    Even after my O.D i still think about cutting i havent yet but it's like every time im in a low mood when i feel like life's got nufing for me i just wanna cut myself really deep because in that moment of time death sounds pretty good.
    ohmylife ohmylife 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 24, 2012

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    Moving away in a few months seems like my last

    and only chance to find happiness. If it fails, im not sure I'll be here much longer. Let's hope that my search doesn't leave me empty handed... :'(
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 22

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    Just took 6 pills of melatonin.

    ...(3mg) Hopefully I don't wake up... But it's obvious that I will.... Unfortunately enough
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 3 Responses Mar 15

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    My first plan, say Plan "A",

    was about ordering Nembutal over Internet .. I did ... But my parcel has been seized by customs ... So that I now have a Plan "B" ... instead of ordering some stuff over Internet , Plan "B" is about going directly to where I can find the needed stuff , SouthAmerica in this case...
    mybygone mybygone 46-50, M Mar 26

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    I should just kill myself.

    ... Id feel much better that way... And so would everyone else...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 6 Responses Mar 25

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    I haven't thought about it in at least 4 months,

    but today I was overwhelmed with stress and it resulted in what I can only describe as an attack of some sort, where I was so convinced that I had to commit suicide that the thought completely flooded my mind. It happened in the middle of class and it took all my energy not to...
    super563 super563 18-21, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    August 26, 2011

    This was one of the worst days of my life. Actually, it started a incredibly bad downward slide that still now has not reached the bottom. I sat on my couch, alone in my place. My wife was out 'scoring'....part of the problem... The money was gone. All of it. Things were being...
    amodelcitizen amodelcitizen 36-40, M 4 Responses May 2, 2013

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    I never actually done anything suicidal like

    though I'm not that into pain but I've heard that some people enjoy pain weird huh... Anyway I'm actually feeling a LOT better these days I may have moments of feeling like I'm through but I kinda want to live my life and see if with time I can change and be bold and come to...
    squiggled squiggled 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 19

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    I have thought about suicide

    when i was a kid and i still do but now i just hide all my feels im literally a soulless doll that doesn't say to many words. I watch everything thats going people don't know this but i know thing they dont want every one esle to know...
    LolipopGummi LolipopGummi 18-21, T 2 Responses Mar 7, 2014

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    i made a suicide note.

    I attempted. I failed. I was too weak, too scared to do it. I still have my note, in my box. What if someone found it? Why do i still have it?
    DetachedCinnamon DetachedCinnamon 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 19

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    I always think about how everything would just

    be easier if when crossing over a road I just stepped in front of the car, idk why..
    browndeadeyes browndeadeyes 13-15, F 3 Responses Mar 30

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    Right now it sounds like the best idea.

    I am not even tired of life anymore it's just the fact that i can't take it anymore.
    BloodyVictim BloodyVictim 16-17, F 15 Responses Apr 24

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    I'm Here For You

    Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over You take out...
    MissJessicurr MissJessicurr 18-21, F 8 Responses Oct 19, 2012

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    it's my own fault but every time I think I'm

    doing good another curve ball is throw why am I this way why can't I change. why is life wasted on someone like me.
    HopelessBlah HopelessBlah 26-30, M Mar 25

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    Right now this would be the most ideal thing.

    .. I just don't want to go on in this much pain and suffering... But I don't want others to suffer so I have to stay strong and suffer for others. I feel so broken and overwhelmed right now it's ridiculous :/ some one please ****** save me for this hell I'm living!!!! Save me...
    Catho Catho 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 3

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    Things never get better.

    ... Do they...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 6 Responses Mar 18

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    bernard1910 bernard1910 51-55, F Mar 18

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    eatthekids1stplease eatthekids1stplease 18-21, M Jul 18, 2014

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    I can't do it anymore,

    I don't want to be here know one understands and it's so ******* hard, I'm so weak I can't do it
    naturallyhappy naturallyhappy 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 18

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    i'm thinking about it

    now in fact. i'm tired of being depressed and sick all the time. i'm tired of being used. i'm tired of hurting. i don't think anyone will miss me except those who will have to do things for themselves once i am gone. i have no wife or kids so no one depends on me. my...