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I Hide Behind A Mask Of Smiles, No One See Beneath The Surface

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 73 People

    The Pain Is Too Big For Me To Handle.

    I have been burying it all my life. People hide it for different reasons......I hide it from myself. If I ever let it out the flood gates would open and I think it would over whelm me. I would then be so depressed I would not be able to dig myself out of the pit I was in. The...
    onnmyown onnmyown 51-55, F Nov 27, 2011

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    What They Think

    My family and my friends believe that i am this happy girl that nothing can get me down but its lies,everyday i feel like i am in pain that all i want to do is run and hide. The laughing go lucky girl is slowing running thin. I don't think I can make one more happy smile. My...
    Darkness96 Darkness96 13-15, F Mar 7, 2012

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    My Beginning Of My Mask

    One day a bunch of kids where bulling me by the time i made it home i was covered in marks my parents wanted to know what happened i said i fell with a big smile on my faces that my parents started to laugh soon after it became who i was. Even to this day i still have my...
    Darkness96 Darkness96 13-15, F Mar 7, 2012

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    Why I Push Things Away?

    Once there was a little girl, She was always happy and free. Then something she loved broke her, She felt no longer free, It might have tooken her years to push it away, But she has to live with all those memories. She doesn't want anyone's sympathy, She's happy with who she is...
    Karma777 Karma777 16-17, F Apr 17, 2012

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    Smile's With No Sound

    My Smiles are draining all my energy, I feel so week, I bottle EVERYTHING up inside of me. I love seeing people Smile it's the key to make people believe your happy. But he's making me feel so weak! We been dating for two weeks... He makes me think the bottling everything up just...
    Karma777 Karma777 16-17, F Apr 29, 2012

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    But I Wish You Could

    I never, ever created my mask of smiles. I never wanted that, as much as it has helped repair some things that were broken, when I was broken and open... not faking my smiles, I never wanted to play this game of happiness pretend. It's all so fake, and I feel like a clown...
    WiltingBlossom WiltingBlossom 18-21, F 4 Responses Dec 3, 2010

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    Thing Is Though...

    It's a lot easier when no one around you cares enough to try and dig deeper.Let's face it. No matter how good we may be at faking it if someone really tried. Really wanted to get underneath our skins, they could do it.
    BeteNoire BeteNoire 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 2, 2012

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    My Crush And I Drifted Apart

    So, this is the story of me and my crush! It's weird, but this really all started with my math teacher... yeah. So, btw, my crush's name will be c, and i'll be k. So, now it's may in 2013, but at the beginning of the school year, i don't remember the exact date, maybe around the...
    lily200klt lily200klt 16-17 1 Response May 12, 2013

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    I Am In Love With Someone Who Doesn't Love Me Back

    I love someone so much who doesn't love me back and I can hardly live with it
    cincityskyles cincityskyles 41-45 Nov 25, 2010

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    No One Knows I Cry Inside

    No one knows that lately, i can't go through a single day without shedding a few tears. In my case, there are several reasons that i might cry, some not so important, but to me, they can totally ruin my day. This has all started ever since i lost contact with my crush. Ever since...
    lily200klt lily200klt 16-17 May 20, 2013

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    My Tears Warm My Heart

    Fake smiles And fake laughter Fake giggles And fake happiness When can i stop trying to fool myself? I am broken deep inside I need forever to heal Sometimes i feel happy But am i really happy? Only tears can warm my weeping heart
    fuglygirlonthebench fuglygirlonthebench 18-21, F Mar 11, 2011

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    Behind The Mask

    As I think how my life is going, I come across a frays in my head. "behind the mask" that is exactly what I am. my definition of it is a girl who may look like she is doing good in her life but when she is on her own it is the complete opposit. someone who fears rejection and...
    cutiev0900 cutiev0900 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 8, 2013

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    I Don't Let Anyone See...

    I don't let anyone see beyond the fake smile, and the stupid laugh. I did a long time ago, I didn't care, but now, I have been hurt too bad, and have been attacked for saying and showing how i truly feel, so I'm done, I no longer share with the world, with my friends, the pain...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Nov 24, 2010

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    Every Morning I Wake Up And Put On My Mask.

    I'm not sure if anyone really knows who I really am. People comment on how bright my smile is or how I'm always "happy". My boyfriend says I am the happiest person he knows. Behind my smile I hide this darkness I've carried around with me for a very long time. I live in this...
    BlackLilly BlackLilly 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 3, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    "Mask" By, me Everyday I try to hide, behind the mask that covers my inside. A smile, a laugh, an I'm okay. Keeps them from seeing the pain I hide away. But sometimes a mask is...
    Spinningoutofcontrol Spinningoutofcontrol 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 4

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    this void that fills my heart will not dissipate. It stays unyielding, Indomitable, mocking me with its ceaseless scorn. waking up as if I never went to bed. Crying with the pain...
    Kanashimisama Kanashimisama 16-17, M 1 Response Dec 6

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    The sun rises, the sun sets...and the thoughts remain the same. Words unspoken, yet scream so loudly, with much intent. Years pass by, emotions suppressed, deep resentment built...
    SecretEscape SecretEscape 36-40, F 3 Responses Nov 22

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    I didn't eventually. There was a time when I wanted to be intimate with my then boyfriend, almost craving it. The problem was he hated his penis and would always hide it from me...
    Whinny00 Whinny00 26-30, F 7 Responses Dec 7

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    Ever since i was a child i always noticed things that were saddening. No matter if others noticed it they would always move on as if it had never occurred. I couldn't fathom the...
    CuriousCausality CuriousCausality 22-25, M Dec 11

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    i was playing hide and seek with my little sister and it was my turn to hide so i ran up the stairs and tried to go under my bed i started to go under but got completely stuck when...
    sootyandsweepandsoo sootyandsweepandsoo 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 24

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    The banking expert services put currency exchange, investment option control and choice child custody, finance therapy, trustee options, lodge shifting, consumer credit score...
    Georgebankssi1 Georgebankssi1 31-35, M 1 Response Nov 26

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    Just A Woman That smiles through her tears. And try's my hardest to fight my fears. Always there for my family and friends. Always will be til the end. A woman that makes many...
    PrincessSleepy PrincessSleepy 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 2

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    Haha... Side #1: Happy, retarded joker!!! Always smiles, very sensitive, swears. A LOT. Never takes things seriously, never quiet, clumsy, tolerant, nice, egotistic. Awesome...
    TheHetalianPewdiepieNerd TheHetalianPewdiepieNerd 26-30, F Dec 12

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    I love all my friends very much. I know they've often told me how much they love me too. I know they think their hearts are in the right place. I've tried to explain this so many...
    badgirlbee badgirlbee 18-21, F 6 Responses Nov 26

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    to hide my cuts I do them on my right thigh so nobody would see them
    thedeathmist thedeathmist 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 7

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    Up until the stalker, that girl I told y'all about - we are officially dating. The other day, she came over to my house and we watched a couple of movies. Later, we decided to go...
    NeoxExor NeoxExor 22-25, M Dec 12

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    I'm the one and only Queen Bee in the land of ep. I rule of the little circle of friends here in beeville. My family would tell you I'm a loving bee. I spread smiles through out my...
    badgirlbee badgirlbee 18-21, F 6 days ago

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    I'm the one and only Queen Bee in the land of ep. I rule of the little circle of friends here in beeville. My family would tell you I'm a loving bee. I spread smiles through out my...
    badgirlbee badgirlbee 18-21, F 5 Responses 6 days ago

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    Tomorrow many across the United States will sit down at the table and enjoy a meal with their families.Not every one will be there,they may be overseas serving our country,they may...
    24Jen 24Jen 22-25, F 6 Responses Nov 26

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    I had a horrible nightmare involving my child, I still feel adrenaline pumping through me. I just want to get this off my chest before I start my day. I was with a family in their...
    alliemamabear alliemamabear 18-21, F Nov 27

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    I really don't want to seem rude, nor offending anyone, but lately I always fantasize about having sex with a Chinese woman. I never did, but I would like to a lot. So I love their...
    Gallot Gallot 36-40, M Dec 12

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    I've spent the last eight years under submission, under depression, under suicidal actions that almost cost my life or at least could have if I didn't ask the assistance of a...
    MachineEmpire1985 MachineEmpire1985 26-30, M 6 days ago

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    You already know how eating well to feel good. You probably also know that exercise is important.Vitamins and minerals need to be synthesized if your body wants to use them, it is...
    waypuma73 waypuma73 31-35, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    when I was little my dad beat me and yelled not to cry...Or else I would get more... Perhaps that's how this all started then throughout my teen years I've had a few mentally...
    boxgirl1987 boxgirl1987 26-30, F 2 Responses Nov 23

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    When I was 6 years old, my parents separated and I ended up moving in with my mom and step-dad, visiting my dad on the weekends. When I was 10 years old, the abuse started. It...
    sunisburning sunisburning 18-21, F Nov 24

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    I'm tired of fighting. I really am. I hate how I'm anorexic!! I always see myself as this fat girl....even though in underweight. I can't be confident or anything anymore. I've...
    BooBear99 BooBear99 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 30

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    I've lost my bestfriend to her boyfriend. we used to be so close last year during school. we had all our classes together we would laugh, cry, & go out together. it was just me and...
    victoriaaaa23 victoriaaaa23 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 30

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    I actually use my username because I close the door to my bedroom, the place where my laptop a journal are, all the time so that my parents don't see what I do and think. In other...
    throughthedoorway throughthedoorway 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 3

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    This past summer at a pool party I was hanging out with a bunch of friends at one of their houses for a little party. There was about eight other guys there and about ten girls...
    Nightwing17 Nightwing17 16-17, M 1 Response Dec 6

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    You can't replace me. You can't do better than me. He may play guitar. He may seem sweet. He may play piano. But he isn't me. He can't write poetry in mere seconds. He can't write...
    Chpt16 Chpt16 16-17, M 1 Response a week ago

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    It seems like my entire life is just falling down around me. I can't get into a relationship, the guy that I like is probably most likely straight, I hate my freaking stepdad cuz...
    youngnfunboi youngnfunboi 13-15, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    My wife of 8 years has had almost no emotional or physical desire for me for about 6 years now, and she is suddenly having excuses to go somewhere mostly on weekends. She won't...
    marriagetakesfunaway marriagetakesfunaway 36-40, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    One side is the sweet and kind me who is always happy and is trying to make everyone around me happy as well, and i will do anything for my loved ones. The other side is like a...
    unidentiffied unidentiffied 16-17, F 1 Response 12 hrs ago

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    People say that I'm either nice, a friendly person, or someone that's great with giving advice towards others. I guess you can say that's true, but behind plastering on a smile, I...
    musicalphantom204 musicalphantom204 18-21, F Nov 29

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    Jealousy is like an ugly Christmas sweater! You can't get rid of it so you hide it in the back of your closet but everyone knows you have it!
    libragirl89 libragirl89 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 30

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    If reincarnation is real, can I just be attractive in my next life? Even if I decide to end my current one in 2016?
    Myzery Myzery 31-35, F 2 Responses Nov 30

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    sylvia. everyday since she betrayed me. nothing but nightmares and pain of losing my soulmate of 4 yeqr one who knew everything about u n vice versa n every dream ect. the one who...
    matrixwolf matrixwolf 16-17, M Dec 1