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I Hide Behind A Mask Of Smiles, No One See Beneath The Surface

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 74 People

    The Pain Is Too Big For Me To Handle.

    I have been burying it all my life. People hide it for different reasons......I hide it from myself. If I ever let it out the flood gates would open and I think it would over whelm me. I would then be so depressed I would not be able to dig myself out of the pit I was in. The...
    onnmyown onnmyown 51-55, F Nov 27, 2011

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    No One Knows I Cry Inside

    No one knows that lately, i can't go through a single day without shedding a few tears. In my case, there are several reasons that i might cry, some not so important, but to me, they can totally ruin my day. This has all started ever since i lost contact with my crush. Ever since...
    lily200klt lily200klt 16-17 May 20, 2013

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    My Beginning Of My Mask

    One day a bunch of kids where bulling me by the time i made it home i was covered in marks my parents wanted to know what happened i said i fell with a big smile on my faces that my parents started to laugh soon after it became who i was. Even to this day i still have my...
    Darkness96 Darkness96 13-15, F Mar 7, 2012

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    Behind The Mask

    As I think how my life is going, I come across a frays in my head. "behind the mask" that is exactly what I am. my definition of it is a girl who may look like she is doing good in her life but when she is on her own it is the complete opposit. someone who fears rejection and...
    cutiev0900 cutiev0900 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 8, 2013

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    Thing Is Though...

    It's a lot easier when no one around you cares enough to try and dig deeper.Let's face it. No matter how good we may be at faking it if someone really tried. Really wanted to get underneath our skins, they could do it.
    BeteNoire BeteNoire 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 2, 2012

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    But I Wish You Could

    I never, ever created my mask of smiles. I never wanted that, as much as it has helped repair some things that were broken, when I was broken and open... not faking my smiles, I never wanted to play this game of happiness pretend. It's all so fake, and I feel like a clown...
    WiltingBlossom WiltingBlossom 18-21, F 4 Responses Dec 3, 2010

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    I Am In Love With Someone Who Doesn't Love Me Back

    I love someone so much who doesn't love me back and I can hardly live with it
    cincityskyles cincityskyles 41-45 Nov 25, 2010

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    What They Think

    My family and my friends believe that i am this happy girl that nothing can get me down but its lies,everyday i feel like i am in pain that all i want to do is run and hide. The laughing go lucky girl is slowing running thin. I don't think I can make one more happy smile. My...
    Darkness96 Darkness96 13-15, F Mar 7, 2012

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    My Tears Warm My Heart

    Fake smiles And fake laughter Fake giggles And fake happiness When can i stop trying to fool myself? I am broken deep inside I need forever to heal Sometimes i feel happy But am i really happy? Only tears can warm my weeping heart
    fuglygirlonthebench fuglygirlonthebench 18-21, F Mar 11, 2011

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    My Crush And I Drifted Apart

    So, this is the story of me and my crush! It's weird, but this really all started with my math teacher... yeah. So, btw, my crush's name will be c, and i'll be k. So, now it's may in 2013, but at the beginning of the school year, i don't remember the exact date, maybe around the...
    lily200klt lily200klt 16-17 1 Response May 12, 2013

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    Smile's With No Sound

    My Smiles are draining all my energy, I feel so week, I bottle EVERYTHING up inside of me. I love seeing people Smile it's the key to make people believe your happy. But he's making me feel so weak! We been dating for two weeks... He makes me think the bottling everything up just...
    Karma777 Karma777 16-17, F Apr 29, 2012

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    Why I Push Things Away?

    Once there was a little girl, She was always happy and free. Then something she loved broke her, She felt no longer free, It might have tooken her years to push it away, But she has to live with all those memories. She doesn't want anyone's sympathy, She's happy with who she is...
    Karma777 Karma777 16-17, F Apr 17, 2012

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    I Don't Let Anyone See...

    I don't let anyone see beyond the fake smile, and the stupid laugh. I did a long time ago, I didn't care, but now, I have been hurt too bad, and have been attacked for saying and showing how i truly feel, so I'm done, I no longer share with the world, with my friends, the pain...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Nov 24, 2010

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    Every Morning I Wake Up And Put On My Mask.

    I'm not sure if anyone really knows who I really am. People comment on how bright my smile is or how I'm always "happy". My boyfriend says I am the happiest person he knows. Behind my smile I hide this darkness I've carried around with me for a very long time. I live in this...
    BlackLilly BlackLilly 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 3, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    Just smile and carry on that way no one sees your real emotion
    Brookedrumm Brookedrumm 16-17, F Nov 3

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    The sun rises, the sun sets...and the thoughts remain the same. Words unspoken, yet scream so loudly, with much intent. Years pass by, emotions suppressed, deep resentment built...
    SecretEscape SecretEscape 36-40, F 1 Response 2 hrs ago

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    Everyone in my family sees only my mask.they only see the quiet but sarcastic girl who smiles at everyone.they don't see that i have never had a friend that I'm bullied at school...
    rocky1308 rocky1308 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 26

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    all my friends seem to think I'm perfectly happy and I have a perfect life due to my fake smiles. I try to tell them its not real but they don't understand. I hate home and I hate...
    midorijane midorijane 16-17, T Nov 13

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    I have so many problems and I'm sad all the time and i feel like its never going to get better. I'm seeing a shrink I don't trust because he and my mom are good friends since med...
    chocolatecurlz chocolatecurlz 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 13

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    No one will ever know how sad I am .. I laugh a lot, I joke a lot and I appear to be very happy! People even ask me how I manage to always be so happy. But when I go home and I lay...
    AaliyahLove AaliyahLove 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 1

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    I feel like a burden on everyone I know. I'm depressed and alone and sad and no one understands because everyday at school I'm this bubbly happy smiling girl that's hiding behind a...
    Depressedgirl29 Depressedgirl29 13-15, F 3 Responses Nov 1

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    What is the big idea behind friendship exactly? Because I just don't understand it anymore. I'm mentally tracking my brain for any definitions, any files I might have on it, any...
    spotofhope spotofhope 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 4

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    I have lost way too many friends in the recent couple weeks. With everyone gone that I have been so close to I just don't have it in me right now to start all over making new...
    Aiyana77 Aiyana77 36-40, T 7 Responses Oct 30

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    reality is a mask we put on life to replicate and recognize you simulate or ostracize. they bleed us dry so high on strife. they can't escape a bloody fate when they kill and...
    kaze1213 kaze1213 22-25, M Nov 2

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    Eyes are so powerful. Once I know a person I can look in their eyes and tell just how they feel. Isn't it weird how all our emotions and all out feelings go to our eyes? Facial...
    saxophonegal22 saxophonegal22 13-15, F Nov 11

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    I do it every time I go out somewhere I made it a habit. To a female I'll smile wave my hand and say "hello beautiful" and continue on with my business. I like to converse with...
    gow90 gow90 18-21, M Oct 22

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    so my husband never goes to bed with me because hes on his phone all night.. today I noticed my husband left his phone and I couldn't resist snooping.. wondering what he does. he...
    lamisspink lamisspink 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 30

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    So my boss at work put up his hand to my face and said can you smile?You telling me to smile makes me not want to why should I force a smile on my face when I'm not feeling it?? It...
    sydneymichelle sydneymichelle 18-21, F Nov 11

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    Girls Spying Me In The Shower Hey guys, before I tell you my story you must know that I`m from germany and my english isn`t perfect. Maybe there some mistakes in my text. Some...
    Mickie19 Mickie19 18-21, M 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    How to Stay Positive-from the speaking tree. 1. Foster Optimism: Trying to be optimistic doesn't mean ignoring the uglier sides of life. It just means focusing on the positive...
    restored87 restored87 46-50, F 8 Responses Nov 10

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    It is a funny story of one of my 2nd or third cousin. She has a step brother. His father married her step mother after her mom had passed away as she was only about 4 or 5. After...
    Lolime Lolime 22-25, F 6 Responses Oct 27

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    After listening to the song about 1,000 times, I think I have found the messages behind this song. One of them is that you should always be yourself. One of the verses says "You...
    coltonfawley coltonfawley 18-21, M 1 Response Oct 30

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    I have two main sides to me, but the majority of people only see one. I wish that I did not hide the other part of me, though, and feel that it is too late now..
    kimb27 kimb27 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 5

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    I try to reach out but it feels impossible! I remember when I young and dumb (19) I fell in love with this girl and it didn't go my way and I was down... But I was living one of...
    ozboybrian ozboybrian 26-30 1 Response Nov 10

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    So, the naked weekend challenge (see previous post) was definitely an interesting experience. By Saturday afternoon I had beaten my record of being nude for 24 hours straight. I...
    emmsbody emmsbody 18-21, F 19 Responses Oct 27

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    After years of being in a comfortable, but not really happy marriage, a younger, very attractive woman surprisingly showed a lot of interest in me. She was married too. It started...
    aquasquirrel211 aquasquirrel211 41-45, M 2 Responses Oct 28

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    I stay in my bedroom and hide away or walk away, I don't like it when people see me crying. It just leaves me so helpless and vulnerable.
    wedgieshurtalot wedgieshurtalot 16-17, F 2 Responses Nov 2

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    Last week I had to go to my local home improvement store. I usually go in the middle of the day to avoid any semblance of a crowd. Thus I had the place mostly to myself - except a...
    CatalinaVanilla CatalinaVanilla 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 9

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    Everybody tells me I'm beautiful, but I don't see it. I just feel hideous.
    xPrincessMia xPrincessMia 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 13

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    Now is usually my chill time. Time for me to just be me and process my emotions from the day. Today I'm being robbed of that being stuck at my moms. No family event or emergency...
    nvragain1024 nvragain1024 31-35, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    And it freaks them out. Some hide. Some deny.
    OddlyScintilating OddlyScintilating 46-50, M 4 days ago

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    two topics on my mind for this post. The reason for the title is simply because perspective is a major function of my mind. 1. A lot of people I know have been really ecstatic...
    colorstone colorstone 31-35, M 2 days ago

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    I have always worn my emotions on my sleeves. I get angry so fast that it shocks me sometimes. I black out and before I know it I'm back and I'm looking at the person who made me...
    SheIsBroken SheIsBroken 18-21, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Decided to place this in here. It's complicated. This post has been inspired by someone I consider to be very close to me and is really pulling on my heart strings, and she's...
    RequitedWhispers RequitedWhispers 31-35, M 1 Response Oct 27

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    I make men men run, They scream in horror when i come around. So I see that when I was married to my verbally abusive husband, I am ruined for life and I will never be loved again...
    pawprints1968 pawprints1968 46-50, F Oct 31

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    He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes Started making his way past 2 in the morning He hasn't been sober for days Leaning now into the breeze Remembering Sunday, he falls...
    RememberingSunday22 RememberingSunday22 36-40, F Nov 4

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    I work with this guy. He is a subordinate, but he likes to critique my decisions as if I asked for his opinion. He is so annoying he says, how are you, multiple times a day to me...
    billiejeanboo billiejeanboo 31-35 1 Response 5 days ago