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I Hold Back My Tears

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 239 People

    Something Left To Hold

    i don't cry as much as i used too.  i actually got to a point where i was crying myself to sleep every night for a long time but things just changed i guess.  19 i still had a heart, 20 began losing it, and now at 21 feels like i lost it.  it's hard to cry when your heart...
    EchoesInTwistedMeadows EchoesInTwistedMeadows 22-25 2 Responses Feb 26, 2012

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    While I Still Can

    I used to cry a lot years ago when i saw my life destroyed by myself and my family/friends. After i turned 18 i tried to just ''man up'' and hold them in. Sometimes i lay in bed and think back about the what could of beens and other things that have upset me and i can feel a tear...
    Shyone2 Shyone2 18-21, F Mar 21, 2012

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    I Try to

    I try to hold them back. Don't always succeed. When I was a senior I did a huge research paper/presentation on the Darfur conflict (this was before it was 'popular'). While I was researching I found this article: http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Feb 5, 2008

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    All The Time.....

    I hold my tears back all the time. I don't let anyone see them fall, and I don't let anyone know that they are falling. I hold them in, till I feel like I am going to explode, I hate crying, I hate when it gets to the point that I feel the need to cry, it makes me feel so small...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Aug 18, 2010

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    Each Time

    It's systematic; my middle name. It passes or breaks.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Feb 2, 2008

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    I don't understand why it is

    so hard sometimes, or all the time, really. Dancing around heart-break is something that I have done my entire life. Through my own decisions, or the decisions of others, my actions or the actions of others... I know heart-break very well. We are old frienemies. "I am not...
    CathyAmes CathyAmes 31-35, F Jun 11, 2014

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    Cold-hearted

    Coldhearted, emotionless, brutally honest-just some of the words that people often used to describe my personality. But one day, one day after several months of recovery-with no alcohol or vicodin to make me strong-I woke up crying and haven't stopped since. Facing the real pain...
    letingo letingo 26-30, F Jul 2, 2010

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    Sometimes

    sometimes, I can hold back the tears, but sometimes, the emotions gets the best of me; and tears just start falling.
    LittleLena LittleLena 36-40, F Mar 21, 2013

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    I Have To Now

    inside, i have lost everything. who i am. what i wanted. and so on...but that is besides the point i think. I have learned that when i cry,i hurt others that i care about. so i have decided to not cry anymore. well, for my stupid inner reasons. if something bad happens to someone...
    SunkinLies SunkinLies 18-21, T Jan 10, 2011

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    Tough

    I am not the kind of girl that cried at sappy movies or when someone says something that is is hurtful. But my husband is in the US Army and everyone says that i need to be strong for him, not to let him see how much i hurt when he leaves and most of the time holding in my...
    thenewmrsL thenewmrsL 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 5, 2008

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    It Wasn't Easy..

    I held them back constantly especially when I am at work or when I am visiting my mum.. This morning I read thru one of my stories here .... titled I Remember... I felt tears flooded by eyes.  I quickly wiped them off with tissue...sniffing away. I do miss 'our...
    Eternal Eternal 31-35, F 2 Responses Aug 20, 2009

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    I Try

    Whenever i get sad or pained enough to cry I cant hold it in no matter how hard i try I just can't. I don't get a lot of friends that way but I just can't help it I mean when I have to i do it I just can't stop it if I want to.  PLEASE COMMENT...
    babydiaperwearer babydiaperwearer 13-15, M 6 Responses Nov 12, 2008

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    Almost Every Day!

     Almost every day I'm faced with an emotional mountain. I struggle with being overwhelmed with life and disappointments. I worry and for my children and their struggles. I want life to be so mucheasier for them. I agonize of the responsibility I have played in their...
    nethingunderdasun nethingunderdasun 41-45, F 4 Responses Jan 14, 2010

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    What Do I Call This?

    I actually cant recall a time when I've cried, and people havent told me to stop it or say something like "Oh great, whats she crying about now?". So, I think you can guess why I dont.
    xxfallxoutxgirlxx xxfallxoutxgirlxx 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 19, 2010

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    blink...Just blink.

    I don't like being made or feeling like I need to cry...and, I definitely don't like crying in front of others. So, I do my best to hold 'em back until I'm in my room and in private. Then, I curl up into a ball and just let it out. If I can't get to my room or my house, I think...
    vinividivici21 vinividivici21 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 12, 2008

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    Scary.

    For me, crying is one of my few weaknesses.  Not only do I hate to cry in front of others, but I also hate seeing others cry. I get hurt sooooo easily.  I'm usually able to hold back my tears.  When I get hurt, people can tell, but they won't see the tears. ...
    oliveoil2007 oliveoil2007 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 5, 2008

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    Fearing The Pain...

    I have to be honest, the majority of the time I force my tears to remain invisible so I don’t have to face the real pain I am feeling. I don’t enjoy people seeing me cry, especially not hearing the sounds I make so I subconsciously don’t let it out. Even when...
    Vikz4913 Vikz4913 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 9, 2010

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    It Just Doens't Come Out Anymore

    It's been a while since i really, really cried and let the tears out. I dunno... I guess, a part of me's afraid of some things again... I guess, crying would weaken me. I know it's not true, but i can't help but feel that way. Sometimes, I jsut want the tears to flow, but a part...
    mistyeyedlass mistyeyedlass 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 6, 2009

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    For As Long As Possible

    I really don't like to let myself cry. Even when I am all alone and I know no one in the world knows, I still feel really bad for even thinking about it. True, most times I do feel better after wards, but I guess I'm the type of person who would rather sit and suffer quietly...
    Melody08 Melody08 18-21, F 4 Responses Sep 26, 2008

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    Like If Crying Is A Bad Thing?

    I am an emotional person..'a basket case' some would say and have. I cry at the scene of 'woman running into the arms of a lover-over joyed to see them'...weddings, when someone speaks of an ill child, or when someone else cries, be it happy or sad--I am moved by emotion. I ve...
    nethingunderdasun nethingunderdasun 41-45, F Sep 23, 2010

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    The Day When Everything Changed..

    When I was but a child, I have lived through countless ordeals. No one wanted to be friends with a girl who's father left behind. I never knew my father, until one day my teacher from preschool caught me crying silently as I watch all the little girls being carried off by their...
    BelLovesYou BelLovesYou 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 9, 2013

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    I Don't Like Letting Ot...

    I don't like letting others see me cry, so I'll try to hold them in.  There's been a few times when I've actually cried though.
    evilkittymew evilkittymew 36-40, F Jan 29, 2009

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    Its so nyc to hear frm people whom u consider most impt family...our frnds....i got a precious member of my family back
    Sitarashines Sitarashines 22-25, F 51 mins ago

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    I wanted to share my story about my relationship with my ex-boyfriend, I'll call him Mark. We met at university, we were in the same friendship group. Mark was the shy, nerdy...
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    I can smell your heartI see you. timid mouse. Your eyes are wide with fear.I can smell it.I feed off of your vulnerability.You look nervous.You can tell. I'll eat you alive.It's...
    thebeautifulprincess thebeautifulprincess 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 27

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    Your indifference showed me that my feelings did not matter to you. Swaddled in yourself I realized that smiling to you was a way to deny myself to really examine the hurt I felt...
    NorthSouthEastWest NorthSouthEastWest 26-30, F Apr 9

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    Yeah and then when I'm finally alone I let my tears flow like waterfalls
    IrwinsScars IrwinsScars 16-17, F a week ago

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    Way more times than I care to admit. Somehow I always get heartbroken. As soon as I start to think "oh he's different" and "he'd never hurt me" it all goes to **** and I'm left...
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    TheLivingDead TheLivingDead 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 24

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    I would go back to University and stick with it instead of quiting. Its so much harder studying as an adult student holding down a full time job. Its so embarrassing bumping into...
    wawow wawow 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 28

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    especially when it's just me and my gf in a couch. I'm usually the one who snuggles up next to her and holds her. I love it when we hold hands and I just play with her fingers with...
    Redmoon383 Redmoon383 16-17, M Mar 23

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    I can also hold my phone, keys, money... basically anything you could normally hold in your hand ;) 
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    I'm holding my pee and I will hold it for as long as you want just message me
    gamergirl16 gamergirl16 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 3

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    The most innocent and basic connection of intimacy between two people. I like the feeling of having my hands around the girl I am proud to be with and a feeling of security...
    Kman4You Kman4You 36-40, M 1 Response Apr 6

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    37 hours 44 minutes deep into this hold! My boyfriend is doing what he can to prolong my hold but I'm so full. I'm in so much pain it's getting hard to breath or even see. I can...
    36hourholds 36hourholds 36-40, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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