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I Hurt Myself Because I Deserve It

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 224 People

    I cut myself because I am fat.

    I started because I'm overweight, and I hate my body. I hate myself for being weak. I looked at pictures of myself four years ago, and though I was fat then, I'm even fatter now. My body is disgusting, so I cut myself on my stomach-- because that's where I deserve it. I don't...
    nvmindme nvmindme 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 12

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    Yes I Do

    I do deserve it I deserve the pain.
    eyeslikestars eyeslikestars 26-30, F 2 Responses Feb 22, 2011

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    How To Forget The Person You Love Most

    im rahul, of 17 years of age. I had a love at first site with my college mate. It takes 1year to accept my love from the one who i propose. it was very fine nd i feel very happy for 2,3 months. Wt happin i dont know after 3 months the girl staris avoidiong me. im very un happy...
    nanirahul nanirahul 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 15, 2013

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    Id Like To Share Today I Was Tough It Helps

    Well im here for one reason thru these eyes to die why not speed up the process a little  i hurt myself for alot of reasons one being because i deserve it  i use to drink away my pain till they sent me to rehab  hell id be drunk right now if it werent for the...
    c1rca4lif3v2 c1rca4lif3v2 16-17 1 Response Aug 15, 2010

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    No-one Can Hurt Me More Than I Can Hurt Myself

    I deserve it, I know I do. All i've ever done is hurt other people... hurting myself stops that pain from being so extreme. I punish myself for it, I can't help hurting other people and they don't understand that, so hurting myself, cutting my skin stops this from being so...
    Raveneyes Raveneyes 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 23, 2012

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    I Am Proud.

    I know i deserve to be hurt. To be in pain. Its really quite strange though, considering that a few months ago i promised myself that i wouldn't break down. I wouldn't hurt myself. That i would survive. How wrong i was, i realise now that i deserve the hurt, the pain and...
    dancetoyourownmusic dancetoyourownmusic 13-15, F 1 Response Apr 18, 2010

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    I Shall Not Break The Rules

    I burn, cut, and brand myself. Why? Well my husband tells me that I deserve it and I know I do so when I feel that he didnt punish me enough I punish myself. "I deserve to hurt because I am worthless and I am a dog. Dogs have no rights, I have no rights. I am scum and nothing...
    bitchbynature0 bitchbynature0 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 27, 2012

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    My Name Is Shaun

    i use self harm because i fell i deserve it . i used to be a cutter when i was younger but i had been able to overcome it for many of years but a few years ago i had lost my father and now i cant seem to stop the abuse. i cut until theres no room to cut , i break my fingers and...
    notsoworthy notsoworthy 22-25, M Jul 17, 2013

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    I'm Getting Better.

    I used to cut myself to hurt myself, because I felt it was a punishment for every bad thing I've done, even if it was just a simple thing like getting a C on a test or something.  But now I haven't cut in over 4 months, and I will never do it again.  I try not to hurt...
    FallingStarr FallingStarr 18-21, F 1 Response May 31, 2010

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    I Deserve To Be Hurt Because I'm Stupid.

    But I'm such a pansy, I can't even cut myself because I don't like pain and I don't like blood, which is just typical of me. Everyone bullies me, they tell me I'm useless and I am, I'm not as good as people I know, I'm definitely not better. I used to think I was smart, but I'm...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jul 28, 2012

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    I Don't Know Really...

    I don't cut my wrists or anything like that. I have anorexia, well i am slowly recovering and absolutly hate life right now. I feel so fat as mum and dad are feeding me loads to make me put on weight and i look awful enough as it is. I feel disgusted when I look at my stomach so...
    xplanbx xplanbx 16-17, F 3 Responses Aug 21, 2010

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    I get so angry with my loving hubby

    and I end up hurting him physically. Scratching, throwing things at him, trying to kick him. And when I realize what I've done I feel the need to hurt myself a thousand times worse.
    lamisspink lamisspink 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 3

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    im a horrible person

    and i don't know why i only deserve to die and i need someone to save me
    Austin5123 Austin5123 13-15, M 6 Responses Apr 15

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    I Really Do

    I've done some horrible things in my life, and it is time I pay for them instead of hiding from karma.
    musared musared 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 23, 2009

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    I Deserve Punishment

    I deserve punishment. My best friends death is at least 50% my fault. I need to cut for that. I lied a bunch today so I'm going to have one cut for each lie, the worse the lie, the deeper the cut. I don't deserve to be happy. I deserve to cut and punish myself. I deserve it for...
    MissingIdentidy MissingIdentidy 22-25, F May 12, 2013

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    I Hurt Myself Because I'm Deserve It

    I'm such a freaking selfish b*tch. I broke up with my boyfriend because I liked someone else. Even if I cut myself and burn it many times but it doesn't compare to the pain of the one I used to loved have now. I'm felt disgusting at myself...
    marry100 marry100 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 7, 2013

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    Yes

    I hurt myself because I know I deserve it. The voices in my head, tell me that I deserve to cut myself, that I have to punish myself for being a horrible person. Its my fault that I am just how I am, and I am the one who has to pay for it.   I cut myself, I burn...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Dec 6, 2009

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    20 Years Of Self Hate

    I have great parents who love me unconditionally - siblings too. Deep friendships... friends who I would die for (literally.... Aristotelean "perfect friends"). A good job, good co-workers.... but I HATE myself. There is nothing inside of me. The razors I use to write these...
    menschfeind menschfeind 26-30 Jul 6, 2010

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    I Deserve To Hurt

    My nutritionist told me today that I need to stop hurting myself because others have hurt me.... that by hurting myself, I'm letting them win twice. It makes sense - I'm not sure why it's so hard for that message to truly sink in. Sometimes though, I hurt myself because I know...
    inhale123exhale inhale123exhale 22-25, F 1 Response Jul 13, 2011

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    I just don't want to bother anyone.

    I don't want to upset anyone but that's all I seem to be good for. I deserve to hurt emotionally and physically. I want it, because it's what I deserve. And I don't feel bad about it, because I feel better when I hurt, but it just makes people even more upset. I don't know...
    Incogneato555 Incogneato555 16-17, F Sep 25

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    Erasing My Life Away

    i had to dump my boyfriend for my parents because they hate how i'm older then him. And now since i had to let him go, i hurt so much, i used an eraser and burned my skin away. I couldnt feel it. I will never date again, well my parents wont let me until i graduate. my friends...
    glodens glodens 18-21, F 7 Responses Dec 14, 2009

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    Never Good Enough

    I was so proud that I hadn't cut in almost a year, and then last weekend it was all too much.  I did it.  I'm a genius at hiding my cuts, so one one knows, not even my husband.  He doesn't know what to do about it anyway, so just ignores it.  I don't know what...
    HRHBastion HRHBastion 36-40, F 3 Responses Aug 26, 2010

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    I Hate Myself

    i dont deserve to be here. i hate myself so much. i cut, i burn, just so i can get rid of the emotional pain. but i cant take it anymore.
    kahtweenuh kahtweenuh 16-17, F Jul 20, 2012

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    This

    Yeah, this ugly piece of **** here, THIS is a work of art. Just not the kind of art you're going to see in a gallery any time soon, nor the sort of thing anyone really wants to spend their time looking at, but hey a canvas DESERVES paint, right? That is what it was built for...
    newmurderer newmurderer 70+ 2 Responses Jun 13, 2010

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    Related Experiences

    I am hurting myself indirectly without wanting to..stop it dammit
    Darlinghton Darlinghton 18-21, M Oct 23

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    Today, I nearly killed myself, because I was struggling from the past and what it had brought. But I didn't, I didn't because I feel like I can Change who I am at any time... Death...
    writingforlife6 writingforlife6 18-21, F 3 days ago

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    I have felt lonely so I had cut myself to cope with the fact that I'm not special or important. the loneliness hurt me bad today and I couldn't stop myself. I haven't cut in almost...
    OnlineCake OnlineCake 26-30, F Nov 2

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    I got hurt it wasn't fun. ...... When the person you need to be there for you and comfort you. Turns out not to be there for you when you fall ..... that's me and that's true.
    Payton20014 Payton20014 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 12

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    Right now everything is falling into thousand pieces..I might be losing my job, my roof had a washer dryer through it, I have no friends in this big city, 3 major college exams im...
    sadieblue44 sadieblue44 18-21, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I cut myself. Friends called the cops. Everyone knows now. I'm 13. Now I have to go see my doctor tomorrow. What's the doctor going to even do? Search me for more? Talk to me...
    DarkOnTheInside13 DarkOnTheInside13 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 11

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    I tried to cut myself when I was 12. Because of a puny, funny reason; I was not able to study all of the subjects for the supposed final exams tomorrow that day. I was so...
    dakilangdreamer dakilangdreamer 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Is anyone else like this, or am I awful? this rarely happens but still, my body does something strange.
    SecretWraith SecretWraith 18-21, F Nov 14

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    I havnt cut in a very long time. I am currently in a legal messed up situation and Ive wanted to quite a bit, for the feeling not the marks....I hate this feeling but I am not sure...
    lovelace7 lovelace7 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 23

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    I havnt cut in a very long time. I am currently in a legal messed up situation and Ive wanted to quite a bit, for the feeling not the marks....I hate this feeling but I am not sure...
    lovelace7 lovelace7 22-25, F Oct 23

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    So I saw my therapist during one of my runs and she stopped me to point out that I had been cutting recently.. I felt like such a loser.. She's really nice and she helps me through...
    Asi15 Asi15 16-17, M 1 Response Oct 24

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    I always wanted to stop. The first time i did this, i had no idea it will be this hard to stop. But i think its too late now. Whenever i tried to recover, i will fail. I guess i...
    flamedoll flamedoll 16-17, F 1 Response Oct 24

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    I cut again tonight and I need to stop. Can someone tell me what to do to feel better and hide scars? I'd chat but I'm on limited data and can't actually use Internet without a sky...
    sonicbazooka sonicbazooka 13-15, T 1 Response Oct 26

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    Its been (about) two weeks since I last cut.. Ive been battling it for this long, but it feels that that record will come to an end today. Today is the day I break. I cant take it...
    LifeOnAThread LifeOnAThread 18-21, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    I've been depressed for five years. No one knows, I only just started cutting... Yaaaa hip cuts....
    MatildaBlack MatildaBlack 13-15, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Please remember that you are not alone, if you need to talk to anyone please feel free to message me.
    Michaelyourguardianangel Michaelyourguardianangel 18-21, M 2 days ago

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    Please take the time to watch this, you're not as alone as you think http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=v7LBggDKEtM
    Michaelyourguardianangel Michaelyourguardianangel 18-21, M 1 day ago

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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Or7bG_57UUI'm sorry....I can't take it back...I know now, one hurt doesn't deserve another.....
    alwayswantingmore78 alwayswantingmore78 36-40, F 17 hrs ago

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    The urge never goes away. As a matter of fact, I kind of want to cut right now. Since I quit I never have, but when I feel bad and have no outlet for my feelings, cutting again...
    SpilledSecrets SpilledSecrets 22-25, F Oct 29

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    I always do this, I isolate myself and don't allow myself to hurt other people because I'm hurt myself and then I find myself feeling alone and I wonder why?
    dreamer0800 dreamer0800 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 29

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    Things have been going pretty unsmooth as of late. My dog died, my mother relapsed into her alcoholism, my father and sister are going away for the holidays (for the first time...
    jennazan jennazan 22-25, F 1 day ago

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    I keep many things to myself because Im scared that if people find out that they will think of my differently. I hurts because it like you have so much weight on your chest.That...
    zoeyflower zoeyflower 13-15, F 3 Responses Nov 9

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    My ex still lives with me even though we broke up last year. We agreed to this living arrangement until she finishes getting her college degree. But it's really hard!!! Sometimes I...
    ArdenWasHere ArdenWasHere 41-45, F Oct 26

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    I hurt someone and I know I can't fix it because they don't care but the truth is I don't only care for the person but started to like him. I hate to say I hurt him because I was...
    herealways2017 herealways2017 13-15, F Nov 5

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