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I Intentionally Make Myself Depressed

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 44 People

    Storm's Brewin'

    And this time there's nothing intentional about it.  Frankly, I'm worried.
    romanticidiot romanticidiot 46-50, M 1 Response Feb 18, 2009

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    In a Way

     I have been depressed for so long that I am so used to feeling down all the time. I don't think I'll ever be truly happy or normal. It would be a miracle if I get better. There have been many opportunities in my life to change and live a normal life but I am so pessimistic...
    reset reset 18-21, F 3 Responses Sep 7, 2009

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    Thriving On Sadness

    I've been depressed for so long. When I was 10-12 years old my mom was as at rock bottom and my piece of shite dad wasn't around. We were feeling pretty low, and everytime my dad made my mom cry I wanted to kill him. I decided no one else was capable of handling our problems so...
    Jan 23, 2013

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    I Guess I Should Clarify Something

    I created the group and chose the word "depressed" because I decided to use the word to mean what people commonly mean by it:  down, gloomy, sad, feeling isolated.  Folks on EP would latch onto that word, say, "Yep, that's me," and we could talk...
    romanticidiot romanticidiot 46-50, M 4 Responses Feb 19, 2009

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    Beating Myself Up

    So I've been very depressed for three or four years now. It started in late eighth grade, and now I'm a rising senior. It's been tough. For a while, I literally didn't go a day without fantasizing about killing myself, and I think that left a lasting effect on me. Even today...
    Freezesmyblood Freezesmyblood 18-21, M 1 Response Aug 21, 2013

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    Fiance's Ex.

    So my fiance and I have been together for a while now and we have a child who's almost one, recently his ex girlfriend has been saying very negative things to me about our child and us being together...   do you think it's out of jealousy?
    TaliaYumYum TaliaYumYum 18-21 1 Response Jul 13, 2009

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    Sometimes, when I can't sleep,

    I think of really sad scenarios that hurt me so much emotionally that I cry, because I want to prepare myself for the worse and so I will be able to be calm when I want to cry in public. But sometimes, I just think of me dying not because I want to prepare myself, because it...
    solisluna solisluna 16-17, F Aug 3, 2014

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    Always

    Sometimes I think of things so much that I just make myself feel really depressed. It's like I want to be like this.. but I don't... I just can't get out of it though. It just goes round and round.. I feel really depressed.. then I feel okay..  and then I think to much...
    BrokenAngelWishes BrokenAngelWishes 18-21, F 6 Responses Jan 31, 2010

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    Sometimes...

    I sometimes feel like a lot of depressed people do where they feel "better" the more sad or down they are. They just get used to feeling that way and keeping their expectations low so they aren't disappointed in life. I've been guilty of this many times in my life and...
    EnigmaVest EnigmaVest 22-25, M Jul 31, 2009

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    "depressed Child"

    On purpose, that is the word that rings through my head as i sit here typing this. Why would someone so sane intentionally make themselves feel unhappy, suicidal, or depressed. I have a happy streak for three or four days, but after that, i sit down and make myself depressed. I...
    dallascowboyz29fan dallascowboyz29fan 16-17 2 Responses Sep 10, 2010

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    Related Experiences

    Why is the media destroying people's mind? Either by making people want to a bloody size 0 and making people get obsessed by this. Which is making some people starve themselves...
    Tofi786 Tofi786 22-25, F 37 mins ago

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    Every day i feel more depressed about my business that dont get better. Its becoming worse and make me lost motivation to meet new people and trying to help them to open an life...
    jasonhin jasonhin 36-40, M 56 mins ago

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    Its just in my DNA to be so full of myself,I can't help but love myself and everything that I do.
    Dracula14 Dracula14 13-15, M 2 hrs ago

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    I haven't had the greatest luck in finding new friends here. I'm willing to share about myself. I'm honest, loyal and trustworthy and I am always here if you ever need to vent...
    HarmonizerLex0401 HarmonizerLex0401 22-25, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    Isn`t it funny how many people are desperately searching for some meaning in their lives while the answer is just on the surface? I truly believe we all came into this world to...
    Tatius Tatius 26-30, F 4 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    I bent down to pick something up from the bottom shelf and farted i stood up straight and started walking. it turns out that i did more than just fart I let out a thick brown warm...
    Erichag13 Erichag13 18-21, F 10 hrs ago

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    Walking around in nature. I could walk forever. In this national park that I find myself in, like so many hikes I've done before but, this one is different. I'm alone as I walk and...
    Sometimesilence Sometimesilence 18-21, F 11 hrs ago

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    Guys i m sharing my luv story or i can say myside luv...here i uses hindi...plzz dont mind... After the 12 th result i was searching for a college... as i use to live in noida... i...
    sadsidd sadsidd 16-17, M 19 hrs ago

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    When all you hear is you're a loser, you'll start to believe you really are.
    PieceOfSummer PieceOfSummer 22-25, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    I think in the back of my mind, I'm always sad. But it's days like these that I know that I really am depressed. Those days where I'm lying on my bed, staring at my ceiling...
    AKGhost98 AKGhost98 16-17, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    For the 5th time since I was 9 yrs old, I saw my Dad having an affair. And for the 5th time, I didn't tell anybody, not even my family.
    PieceOfSummer PieceOfSummer 22-25, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Hurting myself though?? That's a completely different story.
    pinkstarburst pinkstarburst 41-45, F 10 Responses 2 days ago

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    It's not as bad as it could be (and it could be a lot worse), but I can't get myself to a point where I am content. It's only been about a week since summer vacation started, and I...
    dokidokiprayingmantis dokidokiprayingmantis 16-17, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I look around me and I see all the odds are against me and I wonder whether I should even bother. what difference does it make when one man fails to achieve his dream, the world...
    aliensoul101 aliensoul101 22-25, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I am a stay home dad and have two daughters (11 and 13) -My 13 year old always wanted to be a big girl and is independent. Makes it very easy on me to watch her grow up. My 11...
    ilikebeingme ilikebeingme 46-50, M 4 days ago

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    I am a 23 yr old student in college and unfortunately to say, I have been extremely depressed for the past couple of years. This mostly has to do with the fact that I have no...
    lonelyman1113 lonelyman1113 22-25, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Right. Don't come on here much but when I do I tell people about how I'm feeling at the moment. Truthfully I thought I moved on front my ex but she just told me she moved on from...
    Caine135 Caine135 13-15, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    i never thought i could be this depressed. i just miss this girl so much and ive heard about things like soulties and stuff like that and idk it might be true cause i feel like...
    pepetheanarchistfrog pepetheanarchistfrog 13-15, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I do not remember a time where I have been 100% happy with myself and with life itself. I was depressed at a very young age because of things at home but no one knew how I was...
    Charli101 Charli101 16-17 5 days ago

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    I always thought people could tell that I was insecure and depressed, but I have a mask that I put on and everyone says I look perfect. You can almost never tell that I'm depressed...
    sirianstarsoul sirianstarsoul 16-17, M 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    I see it, my mom, my gf ,my sisters , cousins, everyone sees it, I'm just becoming more and more depressed more and more each day, I literally cut myself out of depression...
    Jerseyboi Jerseyboi 18-21, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    I get very sad and depressed at night when I'm alone in my room. It usually happens around 11pm and then continues until I can't distract myself. I get depressed because I am...
    JaxxBlackBlood JaxxBlackBlood 13-15, T 1 Response a week ago

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    I remember having a bad day at school a while ago. I don't recall why I was upset but these two girls noticed and I heard one of them whisper behind me "I think she's depressed...
    anonamanda001 anonamanda001 18-21, F a week ago

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    I make myself cry when I think about me sitting in a doctors bed and the doctor tell me that I am not able to have children. (I'm 13, but I'm talking about when I'm older) I want...
    pie323 pie323 18-21, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    When I was 8 years old my life completely change. My parents broke apart and my dad left us. I attended a different school where I wasn't liked by the teachers or the students...
    LeahLovee LeahLovee 13-15, F 12 Responses a week ago

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    I am the eldest in my sisters. But i constantly have this pressure to get better grades than my sister, she's quite smart. This makes me depressed a lot. The kids in my class...
    Lalaloopsiebabe Lalaloopsiebabe 13-15, F 5 Responses a week ago

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    I feel like i have no life all i do is go to work come home and stay in my room all day on the weekends i just stay in my room. i want to go out and do stuff but im nervous and i...
    smith2590 smith2590 22-25, M Jun 20

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    I was on facebook for 3 years . I made account cos someone told me this site is good. I had only 2 people to talk to and the rest never talked with me. One day i ended up with a...
    lonely4560 lonely4560 31-35, F 1 Response Jun 19

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    I sometimes think school makes me depressed but i am depressed during the summer too..i just dont have to leave my house
    darkskies7 darkskies7 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 18

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    So, I am depressed. Unfortunately it seems a good amount of people on here are as well. A part of me wishes I could move us all somewhere else, where we could try to be happy. I...
    CrimsonKnight117 CrimsonKnight117 18-21, M 1 Response Jun 17

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    I've decided I'm gonna be here now, so here I am... Last night I had a quick wander round the stories on this profile. Makes me wish I hadn't deleted everything on my original...
    SevenTierCrazyCake SevenTierCrazyCake 36-40, F 2 Responses Jun 17

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    I self abuse by hitting myself when I'm depressed. I usually use a hairbrush or a coat hanger. I don't cut. I hit myself because my husband doesn't want to hear about my depression...
    df12arkh df12arkh 31-35, F Jun 16

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