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I Joke

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 30 People

    A fifteen-year old boy walked into a pharmacy.

    "How much is it for one condom?", he asked the pharmacist. "Sorry, son, but they only come in packs of three and they're $3.50," said the pharmacist. "Darn," said the disappointed boy, "I don't have enough money. And today I was planning on getting lucky with my new girlfriend...
    Guvna2106 Guvna2106 31-35, M Mar 18

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    Three friends decided to bet each other $100 on

    who could make their wives scream more from sex. They all go home to have sex with their wives and make them scream. The next day the meet. The first friend says, "I made love to my wife for 2 hours and she was screaming for at least 1 1/2 hours." The second friend says...
    Guvna2106 Guvna2106 31-35, M Mar 23

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    Echo

    Lady goes to the gynecologist for a check up. Reluctantly she gets herself onto the stirrups and spreads her legs for the internal exam. The Doctor gets himself close for a good look and remarks 'My you have a big *****.' 'My you have a big *****'. Ok she says. No need to say...
    scot21 scot21 41-45, M 1 Response Jan 19, 2013

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    Little Boy With His Train Set

    A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of b*tches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last...
    joeandfran joeandfran 51-55, M Jul 12, 2013

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    First Time Sex

    .............. A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night to meet, and have a dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time. The boy is ecstatic...
    goforbroke goforbroke 41-45, M 3 Responses Jul 12, 2011

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    Sipho

    Grade 6 pupils sit in the geography class. The teacher points to a map and asks, "Where's Whashington DC? Anyone know?" Sipho puts up his hand and say's, "Yes, I know where". Teacher says "Come show us Sipho". Sipho walks to the map and puts his finger directly on the spot. "Well...
    YBlah YBlah 41-45 Nov 13, 2013

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    My Turn

    Two lifers in jail share a cell. The big guy is Daddy and makes the small guy suck his **** every night. One day the small guy suggests he should be Daddy for a change. No problem says the big guy, get on your knees and suck Mommy's ****!
    scot21 scot21 41-45, M Jan 19, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Let's make a joke! Respond to this experience with characters, a lead on where it should go, a punch line, or even a whole joke. The result will hopefully be a brand new joke that...
    Midnightchorus Midnightchorus 18-21, M 3 Responses Aug 31

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    I'm a female studying motor vehicle in college. I was raped in the past and I am still dealing with this. The guys in college all make jokes about rape and I really don't find it...
    HC12345 HC12345 18-21, F Sep 12

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    A man is sat in a bar when a blonde woman walks in. Excuse me lady would you like to hear my blonde joke? The man says Listen mister came the reply I may have blonde hair but I'm...
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    I like to laugh and smile but I don't a lot I just fake smile a lot so if you have a joke I would love 2 here it.
    scarlet6 scarlet6 13-15, F Aug 21

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    Two men were arrested in the earlier hours of today. One was reported to be carrying a flat battery , the other a unexploded bomb! The Police charged one and let the other off...
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    This is how I see people. Babies? They are dangerous. Toddlers? They are scary. Kids? No thank you. Teens? Excuse me please. Young adults? Eh. Adults? Hmm.. Elders? Why not...
    Artz4Life Artz4Life 16-17, F Aug 24

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    Not a joke, he is a a bloody nazi murderer. According to his twitter, it is inmoral to allow Down's syndrome babies to be born.
    Danceofhours Danceofhours 36-40, M 1 Response Aug 25

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    So I wanted to commit suicide in the past, so this girl in class said ( if my bro killed himself I wouldn't care ) then I got up and walked out of class and 10mins later I went...
    dominick6 dominick6 13-15, M Aug 27

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    I know it's cool to bash celebrities. But the Beiber jokes have to stop...that's someones daughter.
    Thepainlover Thepainlover 22-25, M 1 Response Aug 30

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    So...a rabi, a priest and a donkey walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "Is this a f****n joke?"
    agbells13 agbells13 31-35, F 2 Responses Sep 3

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    Cat Jokes Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep? A: A stripey sweater! Q: How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling? A: She's got that down in the mouth...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Sep 8

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    A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
    jopava jopava 51-55, M 15 hrs ago

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    Q: Why did the British cross the Atlantic? A: To get to the other tide!
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    Q: What do you call a blonde at the bottom of a pool? A: Air bubble
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    Knock Knock Who's there? Ike! Ike who? Ike-n't stop laughing!
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 9 hrs ago

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    Chuck Norris was once a knight in King Arthur's court. He was known as Sir Beatdown.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 8 hrs ago

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    an old Man and woman hate each other but stay married for years. During their shouting fights, he constantly warns "if I die first, I'll make sure I dig up out the grave and haunt...
    ajrestless ajrestless 18-21, F 2 hrs ago

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    a widow future A woman visits a fortune teller who tells her prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a horrible and violent death this year. Visibly shaken, the woman...
    ajrestless ajrestless 18-21, F 2 hrs ago

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    Yo momma's so fat, her baby pictures were taken by satellite
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Aug 21

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    Wal-Mart Vs Heaven I consider Wal-Mart to be God's gift to shoppers. Here are the similarities I have noticed between the kingdom of Heaven and the Kingdom of Everyday Low Prices...
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    Q: What is the difference between a dead snake in the road and a dead lawyers in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the snake.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Aug 21

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    The number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer. “Sorry I can’t serve you,” states the barman. “Why not?!” asks the number twelve with anger...
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    When Chuck Norris is at the beach he doesn't get tanned the sun gets Chuck Norrised
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    New York never sleeps, out of fear that Chuck Norris might visit it in its' dreams.
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