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I Joke

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 29 People

    Young girl tells her mum I know

    where babies come from, mum looks inquisitively and says go on, the girl says the man takes his thing out of his pants and the girl puts it in her mouth and thats how babies are made, her mum smiles and says thats so sweet, but thats how we get flowers chocolates shoes clothes...
    isitme48 isitme48 46-50, M 1 Response Apr 16

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    Sue asked Linda if she was ok,

    no I have a sore throat said Linda, oh when I het that I give my husband a bxxxxxj and it's better, a few days later sue asks Linda how her throat was, its much better now says Linda,..... Your husband couldnt believe it was your idea at first though!
    isitme48 isitme48 46-50, M 1 Response Nov 28, 2014

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    Sipho

    Grade 6 pupils sit in the geography class. The teacher points to a map and asks, "Where's Whashington DC? Anyone know?" Sipho puts up his hand and say's, "Yes, I know where". Teacher says "Come show us Sipho". Sipho walks to the map and puts his finger directly on the spot. "Well...
    YBlah YBlah 41-45 Nov 13, 2013

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    Hi mate I dealt need your advice,

    I suspect my wife's upto something so I hid in the garage till she came home she pulled up on the drive the interior light came on I saw her fasten her bra and button her blouse up redo her hair and sort out smudged make up she got out of the car and I could see she had ladder'd...
    isitme48 isitme48 46-50, M 1 Response Nov 26, 2014

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    First Time Sex

    .............. A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night to meet, and have a dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time. The boy is ecstatic...
    goforbroke goforbroke 41-45, M 4 Responses Jul 12, 2011

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    Why did the Mexican throw his wife off a cliff?

    Ans: Tequila! de-de-de_de_de_de_de_da
    lipstickgal77 lipstickgal77 36-40, F Nov 8, 2014

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    Walked into my mate's house

    and said sxxxxt your ceilings high, he said I know, wife's idea, she wanted two rooms knocking into one
    isitme48 isitme48 46-50, M Nov 28, 2014

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    Related Experiences

    Off he goes to university, but halfway through the semester he foolishly has squandered all of his money. He calls home. 'Dad,' he says, 'you won't believe what modern education...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 4 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    I recently said something to my sister that was meant to be a joke but she took it personally. The next day she was acting very depressive and my mom said that while talking to her...
    OtsanaWolf3344 OtsanaWolf3344 13-15, F 10 hrs ago

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    Foreplay.... My Idea of Foreplay is her screaming "Screw you" and I reply back, "Bite me" -Walter.
    BroknGirl89 BroknGirl89 26-30, F 16 hrs ago

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    There was this one dude, here on EP, who messaged me saying he was looking for a friend because he thought he might himself. So I talked to him n became his friend. But eventually...
    Eve34 Eve34 18-21, F 14 Responses 1 day ago

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    These are my favorite I found on the internet and I would give them credit but I forget a name of that site. How does NASA organize their company parties? They planet. You kill...
    Ariamis Ariamis 18-21, M 5 days ago

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    It seems very fake, or "Haha... - That was funny, now lets talk about me again, or let me speak"/"Haha, very funny, now let me tell you what is even funnier" Very often when i...
    mirkwood86 mirkwood86 26-30, M 6 days ago

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    Q: What goes Moof? A: A cow with buck teeth. Read more on page: http://www.jokesoftheday.net/jokes-archive/2015/06/23/
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Jun 25

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    Q: Why blonde jokes are one liners ? A: So than people can remember them. [follow for more. No offense to dear blondes ;) ]
    Adamsofeve Adamsofeve 26-30, M Jun 25

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    I look like the joker or that's what I have been told ,
    Herkules Herkules 18-21, M Jun 24

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    I really do :p ...but sometimes my jokes aren't funny and can be taken wrong :c so it's not always a great idea.
    onestepaheadofyou onestepaheadofyou 16-17, F Jun 22

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    how come Peter Pan is always flying? Cause he can neverland. I love that joke cause it never grows old XD
    JaidenCorona JaidenCorona 36-40, F Jun 20

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    Joke time! Picture attached...just found it on FB and want to share it here :-)
    Lakee112812 Lakee112812 41-45, F 3 Responses Jun 16

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    Everything in my life ends up failing. My parents devorced, I ended up in farm house parents said I wasnt allowed anything or anyone. Everytime I gain something better I hear I'm...
    jnasna jnasna 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 14

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    Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime -- Little Johnny...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F Jun 14

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    Chuck Norris is allowed to feed the bears.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Jun 5

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    Contrary to popular belief the Lottery numbers are not random. They are just the number of people Chuck Norris killed that given day.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Jun 5

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    The Advil Commandments So Moses is up on Mount Sinai and he says to God, "God, do I have a pounding headache!" And God says, "Here, take these two tablets."
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 1 Response Jun 5

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    One day, a man at a restaurant suddenly called out, "Help! My son's choking! He swallowed a quarter! Please, anyone! Help!" A man from a nearby table stood up and announced that he...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Jun 5

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    A boy asks his father, "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" "That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner," the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, "Now...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Jun 5

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    Three blondes walked into a bar... You'd think one of them would've ducked
    CaptnMyah15 CaptnMyah15 13-15, F 1 Response Jun 5

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    Jack and Jill went up the hill, so Jack could lick Jill's candy. But with a shock, it was a c*ck. Because Jill's real name was Randy.
    CaptnMyah15 CaptnMyah15 13-15, F Jun 5

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    Chuck Norris always oversleeps simply because his alarm clock is too scared to wake him up
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Jun 4

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    I was a little taken aback when I got my receipt from the funeral parlor, on the bottom of the receipt, after the bill, it read, “Thank you. Please come again.”
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Jun 4

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    Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad? A: Senator.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Jun 4

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