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I Just Purged

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 34 People

    Words. Words. Words.

    To make this long story short, i'll keep it simple.Dad gets angry.Dad proceeds to call his bulimic daughter a worthless, lazy, fat *****.Daughter purges. And is very upset.It hit me though, like a ton of bricks. That he would call me fat. The connotation of that word, it ugh...
    CrazyHippieChick CrazyHippieChick 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 2, 2012

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    My Final Stand

    My tooth hurts. A lot. It could be that I haven't stopped purging in the last 3 weeks. I want to say I can't help it, but I don't want to bullshit myself. I could help it if I really tried. Maybe if I tried harder than I am now. I'd have to chain myself to my bed, throw out all...
    sweetskinnytomato sweetskinnytomato 18-21, F 4 Responses Feb 18, 2010

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    I just purged this time.

    . I don't know how much more I'm gonna be doing this but I hope it will be the last.. It surely won't be the last anyway. I don't feel any guilt for doing this. It feels like I never did anything stupid
    PureLies PureLies 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 17, 2014

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    Over And Over Again.

    Its sad and almost makes me want to laugh at the irony. This is one of the few experiences that I have each and every day (sometimes multiple times in one day). I can't remember the last time I went a day without purging. I pray for the day...the one normal day! This has been...
    fighting4life fighting4life 26-30, F Oct 7, 2011

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    Couldn't take the fat anymore.

    Made my self through up now cleaning my face cause of me crying
    Kelnea Kelnea 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 12, 2014

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    It's the first time I've successfully purged a

    lot but I'm freaking out and finding it hard to breath I can't believe I just did that, I have to go outside and join everyone but I don't think I can at this stage.
    Darkerthanlightash Darkerthanlightash 16-17, F Dec 20, 2014

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    My Final Stand

    My tooth hurts. A lot. It could be that I haven't stopped purging in the last 3 weeks. I want to say I can't help it, but I don't want to bullshit myself. I could help it if I really tried. Maybe if I tried harder than I am now. I'd have to chain myself to my bed, throw out all...
    sweetskinnytomato sweetskinnytomato 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 18, 2010

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    && I Feel Guilty Either Way.

    Guilty for gaining weight.And now guilty for letting go of all the work I had put into not doing it for these last couple months.I want to be worthy of love.And beautiful.Sometimes, I wish I was someone other than me...Look inside my heart and be amazed.
    CrazyHippieChick CrazyHippieChick 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 14, 2012

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    I was on day 4 on my fast

    and I ate I ate like the fat *** I am!! But I purged it all and took a freezing bath. That's my punishment for doing eating I have to start all over tomorrow....
    anasflower anasflower 16-17, F Nov 12, 2014

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    Stupid

    I messed up & I don't know why I just flipped out & felt sick. I should never eat with my mom because she makes me so nervous. I hate eating. I hate food. I hate recovery.
    itsjustmelexie itsjustmelexie 16-18, F 2 Responses Aug 19, 2007

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    I just binged and purged.

    ..not proud. Haven't done that in a while. In a lot of pain.
    Lucile199 Lucile199 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 1, 2014

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    Didn't Go Very Well

    Although, in theory, every purge I have I should consider bad-just by its existence- I hate when I have a truly horrible purge. I just did, it was painful, slow, loud, and hardly anything came back up. In addition, I've been more paranoid about getting caught. I don't know why...
    feelingfoolishlame feelingfoolishlame 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 18, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    I haven't purged in 4 days, mostly due to eating below my limit but my stomach feels slightly better and I have actually lost some weight. I'm sure I'll binge any day soon and...
    poodahpop poodahpop 18-21, T 1 Response Dec 27, 2014

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    Things began normally. We were together a short while before his eating disorder became an issue. He would tell me in detail about his purges. I was so dependent on him I became a...
    gothstan gothstan 16-17, M 5 Responses Jan 2

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    I took a couple generic laxatives and a water pill and now am stuck in the bathroom. It's sad that I've let my weight issues control me and that I keep doing this time and time...
    fallout07 fallout07 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 2

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    I can't sleep because I'm excited for tomorrow. I'll be at home alone with my sister. I won't have my guardian breathing down my neck. I really hate her. I don't think i'll sleep...
    ImYourLady ImYourLady 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 5

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    When I was younger my step dad did hit me and pull my hair and kick me but physical pain eventually stops and heals. I was twelve years old being called fat, being called ugly...
    upupandaway24 upupandaway24 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 5

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    I just purged for the first time in 4 months:(
    buttonsandbowsx buttonsandbowsx 13-15, F 2 Responses Jan 5

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    Today was just another Sunday. It was unusually cold for Texas, and the pitter-patter of rain could be heard outside of my window. As I listened to the rain, I rolled over in bed...
    TheWhimsicalHeart TheWhimsicalHeart 16-17, F 4 Responses Jan 11

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    When I was growing up, my view on beauty was different. I remember going online and talking to people. There was this one boy whom I was falling for he asked me my weight. I was 5...
    chunkyislandgirl54 chunkyislandgirl54 22-25, F 5 Responses Jan 12

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