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I Keep My Pain Inside Of Me

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 399 People

    The Joker

    Whenever I try to think about the past, it is always the bad memories that come first. In elementary school, true to the typical Asian stereotype, I was a kid who liked reading and math as much as playing outside during recess. I was proud of myself when I learned to multiply on...
    MyOwnPoison MyOwnPoison 18-21, M Jul 29, 2013

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    We Succeed In One Thing

    We hurt.. Our heart gets pounded by an emotional hammer. Someone just grabbed our heart and thru it to the ground and stomped on it. We try to forget the heartbreak we just went thru. So we stay busy. We work day in day out trying to forget. But it's more difficult as the days go...
    shakenama shakenama 41-45, M Feb 24, 2012

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    "Empty"

    I sometimes feel like a failure and I hate the feeling it gives me. A lot of people say they feel "empty" but I have never felt that. I always feel something, even if it is sorrow or disappointment. I often wonder what it feels it like to be empty. What if I was empty? Would that...
    faithful98 faithful98 16-17, F Jan 31, 2013

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    Just Because I'm Not Complaining Doesn't Mean Life's Perfect

    I try t keep it inside of me for a [seemingly] good reason though. I feel like I'm only adding weight to my freinds shoulders and I'm dumping my problems on them, and it makes me feel terrible. Now I'm sure one of my friends might be reading this right now and will comment...
    MusicAddict4Life MusicAddict4Life 13-15, F May 22, 2012

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    that moment when you like someone

    and the person leaves u and you don't wanna show anyone ur pain so you do a silent cry on which u try so hard not to give up but the person that you liked knew you so well it hurts badly and you don't even feel anything anymore
    nightmare06 nightmare06 13-15, F Jun 29

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    Related Experiences

    I hate to see people in pain it's like a bad feeling inside because you wanna see people happy, and you don't want that person to feel sad, depressed, alone, relationship issues...
    talaunanna talaunanna 16-17, F 8 hrs ago

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    I hate doing this because it's not keeping me real, but at the same time it makes me strong.
    WokenandOpen WokenandOpen 31-35, M 1 day ago

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    My cocktail of pain meds kills most of my emotions such as crying, loss of friends or family, etc. I only recently had a special lady on here lift the iron curtain holding my...
    boldtimer boldtimer 66-70, M 1 day ago

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    I know your desires and I know about your needs.If others new all I do about you they would adore you as well as I do now.You're on this site a dark shining light.Beautiful inside...
    thebustierthebetter thebustierthebetter 46-50, M 2 days ago

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    I only took to doing this recently, because I need the distraction, and more than anything it seems to reset me for a short time. I just need to keep functioning until I can beat...
    MrWinstonSmith MrWinstonSmith 22-25, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I keep my thoughts & feelings inside, it's easier to keep them in than try to explain things when I don't understand them myself.
    Nae82 Nae82 31-35, F 5 Responses 4 days ago

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    You and I go hard at each other like we're going to war. You and I go rough, we keep throwing things and slamming the door. You and I get so damn dysfunctional, we stopped keeping...
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 days ago

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    To me, the worst feeling in the world is the feeling of being trapped. I have felt this way for as long as I can remember. However, in one sense, I must accept that everyone is...
    DepressedDemigod DepressedDemigod 22-25, F 5 days ago

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    What am I living for? This has been on my mind. Anyway, it's just temporary thoughts (I never attempted to. . .). I'd be selfish if I do. Then I thought of my loved ones. It might...
    MonolidEyes6002 MonolidEyes6002 18-21, F 6 days ago

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    You ever look at yourself in the mirror and see a different person. I see someone that's never been noticed that's only been judged. I see a kid that should never think that the...
    aaronsevenseven aaronsevenseven 13-15, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    You don't know pain until you are staring at yourself in the mirror with tears streaming down your face, and you're begging yourself to just hold on and be strong. That is pain.
    Ana104 Ana104 18-21, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    For the past 3 years, my life has felt something like a bad trip on a generous dose of acid. The difference is, when you're on acid it is at least possible to take comfort in the...
    ThisAnimalIsFree ThisAnimalIsFree 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 23

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    "Death is the end of our life. After a good life, we should have a good death. A good death is death without pain, where you can say "I had a good life, and I can now go to the...
    Mags40 Mags40 41-45, F Jul 23

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    I know someone who embalmed corpses. Press sweaty breaths out of the diaphragm, fill the body with salts and preserving fluids, position them carefully. Last of all, he sewn the...
    natarisworld11 natarisworld11 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 22

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    I started crying for no reason. I just became overwhelming depressed. It's as if a wave of sadness splashed over me, flooding the beaches of my mind with its ever-present blueness...
    wishingforrecovery wishingforrecovery 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 22

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    I really think the pain is going to kill me. I keep telling myself that I am doing the right thing, keep moving forward, but I can't anymore. I don't want to. It hurts too much.
    TheGoddessB TheGoddessB 31-35, F Jul 21

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    I want to cut myself right now but I know that i can't. It would be a step backwards that i would use against myself in the future. My husband (who I am Leaving) and i just had an...
    Etheros Etheros 46-50, F 3 Responses Jul 21

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    i am very quick to anger and when im confronted with difficult people i wanna be aggressive. but i keep this all inside because i care about how people think. my girlfriend...
    samwicher samwicher 26-30, M 1 Response Jul 21

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    I'm just sitting here on days off smoking weed to make the pain and sadness go away... Day 3 in a row. Here we go.
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 21

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    yesterday was really bad for some reason. I was just in pain all day. but think it's over now. made it through yesterday
    Anuska23 Anuska23 22-25, F Jul 18

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    I have been so weird as of late, mixed feelings have come on my way and I feel so blinded. I don't understand who I am anymore and what I have to feel inside hurts and pleases me...
    actuelly actuelly 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 17

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    So worried about myself...I know there's something seriously wrong with me and I go crazy trying to figure out what it is. This makes me believe that I have everything wrong with...
    Fiftypercent Fiftypercent 18-21 1 Response Jul 17

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    And there is no cure. Its too late. I keep screaming for help but none comes
    wanttobeusedup wanttobeusedup 31-35, M Jul 17

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    Car Radio, https://youtu.be/CTxSopRai1Y --- lyrics: I ponder of something great My lungs will fill and then deflate They fill with fire Exhale desire I know it's dire My time today...
    DreamingKate DreamingKate 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 16

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    It feels like my uterus is being stabbed with a million sharp knives and being ripped out. I'm in so much pain, and no matter what I do, I can't get comfortable :'( the tears won't...
    lizygurl lizygurl 18-21, F Jul 15

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    I am 16 and I have cronic pain.. It dosent feel well and I can never do anything about it. it has caused problems and has been ripping my life in two. I am Bedridden and most of...
    Vlette Vlette 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 15

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    Was I supposed to leave all of our forgotten memories to our first hello to our last goodbye Now you shot me with a bullet full of pain You put a whole straight through my...
    aaronsevenseven aaronsevenseven 13-15, M Jul 14

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    For a moment, just a moment, I was completely whole.So very ecstatic and joyful inside. Happy was the way I went when  I walked.I awoke dressed with a smile.Where'd did...
    LadyGallivanter LadyGallivanter 70+, F 3 Responses Jul 13

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    My hands hurt. That is the worst of it. My hands. They are always aching. It's like a constant dull ache in the joints. It's in the fingers and the wrists. It started in my left...
    FriendlyBryan FriendlyBryan 46-50, M 3 Responses Jul 13

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    Suppose that I stopped caring Suppose that I moved on Suppose that we never happened Wouldn't that make me a different person Why did you disappear from the place you call home...
    aaronsevenseven aaronsevenseven 13-15, M Jul 13

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    These past few weeks have been a mess. Details are too painful. But I've had to cut out the person I've been in love with for 3 years. I finally chose to do what's best for me, and...
    SimplyEm SimplyEm 18-21, F Jul 12

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    You know I'm breaking down your door yelling out your name looking for you and making sure you're okay I ask if you're alright you nod with so much feeling but I can see all of...
    aaronsevenseven aaronsevenseven 13-15, M Jul 12

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    Sometimes I want to burst out with tears and let it all out I cannot take this anymore But it's something that we've all experienced before I am captivated by the way you make...
    aaronsevenseven aaronsevenseven 13-15, M Jul 12

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    Who am I thinking about you Who am I missing you I don't want to wake up with you nowhere to be found I'm looking out my window thinking where on earth you could be It seems like...
    aaronsevenseven aaronsevenseven 13-15, M Jul 12

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    The pain and the anger fades slowly, but the thought of being without him hurts so much more. And lately, I've been more worried than usual. Every day, we grow one day closer to...
    therainbowtree therainbowtree 26-30, F Jul 11

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    I'm trying to make small changes in my life but the past keeps stabbing my back. Poor choices. Losing my parents. Living with depression. Things pressing on me. I'm overwhelmed...
    Ludavin Ludavin 46-50, F Jul 10

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