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I Know My Heart

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 139 People

    We Consciously Tried To Be No Bother

    We went back to our spot near Sedona and saw the beautiful comfortably settled-in homes that look out across the valley, just like we used to do while sitting in our folding lawn chairs next to a wait-a-minute bush.  We couldn't actually deny a certain beauty of freshly...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 8 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    What would it say, if my heart could speak?

    It would tell you a most horrific story, one of constant pain and near torture. It did not have to suffer, it could have chosen to stop at any time. Instead it chose daily to take the path of agony, daily to feel the pains, daily to be tortured and tormented .... and it chose...
    Extant1 Extant1 51-55, M 4 Responses Mar 11

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    Dweller In Multiple Worlds

    I'm beginning a walk.  A tour of a farm,  of struggles and achievement.  Of nothing.  I leave out that which would cause purposeless sorrow. It's 1940.  The  fence is clear of brush, has sturdy posts, and the wires are stretched tight enough that you can climb...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 11 Responses May 6, 2011

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    Wow. I'm floored. He's planning a move here.

    .. And I don't feel pressured, I feel... Peace... Anticipation... Gratitude. Which is frickin' off-the-charts Miraculous!! I mean, men have suggested such things before -just a couple of Weeks Ago, in fact, most recently- and I've gone into PANIC mode!! Even if its been...
    AdoraGel AdoraGel 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 4

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    The Mystic's Pain

    If the sky were to become purple-black and rain searing green fire all ‘round, it would have nothing to do with the the feelings in a mystic’s heart.    But when he makes an opening between his fingers and looks out, he hears our cries--our suffering because we haven’t...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F May 15, 2011

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    Meeting a Mystic, a Disciple of Paramahansa Yogananda

    She was young and I was young, but she was mature enough to be called a spiritual giant, and I was mature enough to know that it was true.   When I saw her across the lawn my homing instinct took me, and as she walked here and there I floated, entranced, behind her right...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 9 Responses May 15, 2011

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    And I Thought I Had Been Living Simply.

    I find getting old to be a very great pleasure as I sit in my not uncomfortable chair.There’s no desire for a magazine or a computer or TV or phone or backrub or window view—actually, not even for chocolate.. Inside there is comfort.  It’s very interesting inside.  There...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 10 Responses Nov 9, 2012

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    The Lover

    OUT THERE IN THE WORLD COGNIZED BY MIND   THE LOVER IS UNSEEN AND RARELY SUSPECTED,   THE CARESSES ASSIGNED TO A SOURCE OTHER,   THE GIFTS TAKEN TO BE THEIR OWN PROGENY. 
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 2 Responses May 13, 2011

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    An Ocean Of Flowers

    I flew, speckled with luminous electricity, A crazed dragonfly, with black sea-horses for escort When dreams were crushing with bitter blows My skies of ultramarine were burning Into the unknown yellow ochre orb ... It was then that I saw an ocean of flowers    
    THEMADHATTERXXXX THEMADHATTERXXXX 46-50, M Oct 7, 2011

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    Training A Child In The Way He Should Go -- Aka -- A Harsh Environment Demands That A Child Learn To Accept Responsibility

    This is the story, told by The Gypsy,  of a climb she made out of the Grand Canyon with a party of Havasupai, and of a boy's adventures on that trip. The child had been told, the night before, that they would be accompanying the group setting out the next day to gather pine nuts...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 3 Responses Feb 2, 2012

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    Lifes Blessings

    Before you were born, before any sonogram could tell me, I knew your sex. Before any pregnancy test could tell me, I knew you were growing inside of me. I knew I loved you before any doctor or test told me that you were there. When you were born, the pain was forgotten when you...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses May 10, 2011

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    Favorite Experience Recorded in My Journal

      I loved riding along the California coast and enjoying the plants, so different from those of the desert and of the Midwest.   Five years before the events of this story Hubby had decided we would move back to the Midwest, and separation from folks who had given me support...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 8 Responses May 29, 2011

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    As Good As Any Revenge

    My mother was strong and my dad wasn’t. He was fifteen years older than she. Before he died, after he needed care and came to live with us, Daddy told me he was afraid that Mother was going to give everything to my little brother and that he would fight her to get anything...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 14 Responses Mar 30, 2012

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    Romance is Divine

    Romance is divine When one's romance is with the Divine.
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 3 Responses May 31, 2011

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    There's just something about the character

    roles Jason Bateman plays that makes me wish I could find his twin. Where is that handsome perfectly imperfect man... Seems like or rather it is like I always end up with the the opposite.... :/
    Bssanglergrl1 Bssanglergrl1 36-40 1 Response Jun 10

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    I Know My Heart... But my Brain does not.

    There's been a long-standing fued & disconnect, between the two, for over 30 years now. So, you see... If I seem a bit wild & contradictory, it's because I am. =) The divide within my soul has long been there, & two weeks ago, the materials necessary in altering the past...
    AdoraGel AdoraGel 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 24

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    The Love Egg

    There were strange events surrounding the group of young men with whom our son met often, and he remembers it a little differently than I do, but he didn’t record it and I did. Here’s one of the events, another story from the front of my journal. It was a nice group of teen...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 2 Responses Oct 17, 2011

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    OH – MY – GOSH – YES – THERE – IS

    – A – SANTA. Something made me watch BECOMING SANTA, a movie for which I had seen no recommendation at all, other than the fact that it is a Christmas movie. It turned out to be about 'real world' guys who play Santa. I stuck with it, all the while thinking how odd it...
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 3 Responses Dec 11, 2013

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    In

    It is a place of friendly shadows, with lichen and mushrooms and fairies. Her feet go soft on moss, and she can lie on her stomach with the cosmic lover and watch fishes in clear greeny pools. The beauty makes her eyes mist. This is why she loves being alone.
    nelladell nelladell 66-70, F 4 Responses Jul 9, 2011

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    Know My Heart

    Why do I pray? Do I pray to say I prayed an hour? Why do I love? Do I want you beholden to me? Why do I help? Do I help to hear my name called out? And why do I sing? Search me and know my heart, Oh God. See if there is any wrong thing in me All I have ever really wanted...
    MorningBreeze MorningBreeze 56-60, F 2 Responses Aug 7, 2011

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    And it knows me. Indigo

    or autistic is possible. So i must learn more. Or just love being caring.
    Converted Converted 46-50, M Mar 12

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    Soft-Hearted

    Well, I was told to stay away from animals... family does not allow to have any pets.. but I guess a dog changed my heart.. India has many stray animals.. I was in college living away from home.. Once I saved a little pup who couldn't walk - from a herd of locals dogs out to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Sep 27, 2013

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    Having my son surprise me with a visit is the

    best . Having him give me a hug is the best feeling in the world even though he's now taller than me. Made me remember how as parents we hug our children to make them feel loved, comforted and protected. All I can say now is that my son made me that way today. ❤️
    Bssanglergrl1 Bssanglergrl1 36-40 2 Responses Jun 18

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    Related Experiences

    I am so confused and I don't know what to do. My thoughts are swirling around in my head making me dizzy. My heart is thumping out of control. The man I use to count as my best...
    Darkenedlace Darkenedlace 26-30, F 2 Responses 48 mins ago

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    Little do they know, they mean nothing at all to me.
    xoxoxxooxoxo xoxoxxooxoxo 18-21, M 3 hrs ago

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    "Your words are always so soothing." She says... Ahh, my dear, if only you knew. No, no, not my words, not always, but yes... I understand the sentiment... And I accept the...
    AdoraGel AdoraGel 31-35, F 4 hrs ago

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    I promise that one day I'll be around I'll keep you safe I'll keep you sound Right now it's pretty crazy And I don't know how to stop or slow it down Hey I know there are some...
    Johnviolinist823 Johnviolinist823 22-25, M 6 hrs ago

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    You're My Everything (The Wedding Song) Kevin Chase "When I wake up you're by my side, your breath on my cheek I feel so alive you move me in so many ways. As I watch you walk...
    Johnviolinist823 Johnviolinist823 22-25, M 11 hrs ago

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    I don't know what it is but after 7 + years of trying to make a relationship work all the while knowing it should never have started. And finally attempting to call it quits (which...
    dpcl614 dpcl614 41-45, F 2 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    I've lost everything that ever meant anything to me. My father is now a heroin addict, he used to beat me for years and years, my mother would never do anything about it. He would...
    NettyHope NettyHope 18-21, F 3 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    I saw you on a fine summer day. The look you had on your eyes is shimmering with the sunlight shining at you. As I look in your eyes, all I can see is what used to be history. The...
    HeartsBlossoms HeartsBlossoms 13-15, F 18 hrs ago

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    I started date him on july 15 and we broke up last night on july 30. It was my will. I just can't handle the pressure in my heart and my mind whenever I see my family and him. He...
    meandmythought meandmythought 26-30, F 18 hrs ago

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    We've been broken up for three months and we were only together for six but that doesn't mean anything. When you find a deep rooted connection with someone and you just know that...
    JennPenn JennPenn 18-21, F 1 Response 21 hrs ago

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    I miss you. I miss the way we used to stay up late at night just to talk about life, about what the future holds, and about how the choices and mistakes that we made in the past...
    rosswakeman rosswakeman 22-25, M 1 day ago

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    I'm just so emotional right now because some people are just pathetic and don't know how to treat someone right. I honestly don't know why you would say that you love me at one...
    BrycePluck BrycePluck 13-15, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    It's been five months since you went away You left without a word and nothing to say When I was the one who gave you my heart and soul But it wasn't good enough for you, no So I...
    CasseMoi CasseMoi 36-40, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    This is a long story.... Just before beginning of the school year this year this guy added me on Instagram he was native like me n he lived in the same area I was living in. So I...
    cassie200015 cassie200015 13-15, F 3 days ago

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    well.. I haven't posted in a while... I've changed... I guess pain changes ppl but it also makes them stronger... but I guess it puts a wall between light... this is what I'm...
    Silentsuffer Silentsuffer 13-15, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Lying in my bed Alone with my thoughts About you About me Confusion looms About us Causing pain In your heart Feeling the pain in your heart Healing the pain in your heart...
    DutchMattie DutchMattie 36-40, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    The girl I loved cut me out of her life for no reason and I'm really at a loss. I'm young, gay, and meeting girls was always hard for me; I've been in relationships before and they...
    whoaitsalex whoaitsalex 18-21, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    There's a box With a lock In the corner of a room. In a house On a hill, That's hidden deep from view. And I know, Never doubt- There is something deep inside.. It's my heart...
    Livedeliberately Livedeliberately 41-45, M 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    I hurt so much. The tears just won't stop. Sobs coming from my soul. I miss him so much. I don't know if I can find all the pieces of my heart. He left and I can't function. I...
    moonstar312 moonstar312 36-40, F 4 days ago

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    I was engaged nearly a decade ago to a boy. He is a man now and i am a woman. He is the first one who kissed me, who held my hand, who touched me and after all these years when i...
    tee2810 tee2810 26-30 5 days ago

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    05/22/15. We had made it 10 months. From hating to loving. Arguing and making love. Not wanting to talk to nobody better not try to talk to you. We had it all. The ups and downs...
    TaurasiWade TaurasiWade 22-25, F 1 Response 5 days ago