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I Know My Heart

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 90 People

    Favorite Experience Recorded in My Journal

      I loved riding along the California coast and enjoying the plants, so different from those of the desert and of the Midwest.   Five years before the events of this story Hubby had decided we would move back to the Midwest, and separation from folks who had given me support...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 8 Responses May 29, 2011

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    The Love Egg

    There were strange events surrounding the group of young men with whom our son met often, and he remembers it a little differently than I do, but he didn’t record it and I did. Here’s one of the events, another story from the front of my journal. It was a nice group of teen...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 2 Responses Oct 17, 2011

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    Dweller In Multiple Worlds

    I'm beginning a walk.  A tour of a farm,  of struggles and achievement.  Of nothing.  I leave out that which would cause purposeless sorrow. It's 1940.  The  fence is clear of brush, has sturdy posts, and the wires are stretched tight enough that you can climb...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 11 Responses May 6, 2011

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    An Ocean Of Flowers

    I flew, speckled with luminous electricity, A crazed dragonfly, with black sea-horses for escort When dreams were crushing with bitter blows My skies of ultramarine were burning Into the unknown yellow ochre orb ... It was then that I saw an ocean of flowers    
    THEMADHATTERXXXX THEMADHATTERXXXX 46-50, M Oct 7, 2011

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    And I Thought I Had Been Living Simply.

    I find getting old to be a very great pleasure as I sit in my not uncomfortable chair.There’s no desire for a magazine or a computer or TV or phone or backrub or window view—actually, not even for chocolate.. Inside there is comfort.  It’s very interesting inside.  There...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 10 Responses Nov 9, 2012

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    Training A Child In The Way He Should Go -- Aka -- A Harsh Environment Demands That A Child Learn To Accept Responsibility

    This is the story, told by The Gypsy,  of a climb she made out of the Grand Canyon with a party of Havasupai, and of a boy's adventures on that trip. The child had been told, the night before, that they would be accompanying the group setting out the next day to gather pine nuts...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 3 Responses Feb 2, 2012

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    The Lover

    OUT THERE IN THE WORLD COGNIZED BY MIND   THE LOVER IS UNSEEN AND RARELY SUSPECTED,   THE CARESSES ASSIGNED TO A SOURCE OTHER,   THE GIFTS TAKEN TO BE THEIR OWN PROGENY. 
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 1 Response May 13, 2011

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    Meeting a Mystic, a Disciple of Paramahansa Yogananda

    She was young and I was young, but she was mature enough to be called a spiritual giant, and I was mature enough to know that it was true.   When I saw her across the lawn my homing instinct took me, and as she walked here and there I floated, entranced, behind her right...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 9 Responses May 15, 2011

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    Soft-Hearted

    Well, I was told to stay away from animals... family does not allow to have any pets.. but I guess a dog changed my heart.. India has many stray animals.. I was in college living away from home.. Once I saved a little pup who couldn't walk - from a herd of locals dogs out to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Sep 27, 2013

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    Romance is Divine

    Romance is divine When one's romance is with the Divine.
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 3 Responses May 31, 2011

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    As Good As Any Revenge

    My mother was strong and my dad wasn’t. He was fifteen years older than she. Before he died, after he needed care and came to live with us, Daddy told me he was afraid that Mother was going to give everything to my little brother and that he would fight her to get anything...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 14 Responses Mar 30, 2012

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    Lifes Blessings

    Before you were born, before any sonogram could tell me, I knew your sex. Before any pregnancy test could tell me, I knew you were growing inside of me. I knew I loved you before any doctor or test told me that you were there. When you were born, the pain was forgotten when you...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses May 10, 2011

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    We Consciously Tried To Be No Bother

    We went back to our spot near Sedona and saw the beautiful comfortably settled-in homes that look out across the valley, just like we used to do while sitting in our folding lawn chairs next to a wait-a-minute bush.  We couldn't actually deny a certain beauty of freshly...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 8 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    In

    It is a place of friendly shadows, with lichen and mushrooms and fairies. Her feet go soft on moss, and she can lie on her stomach with the cosmic lover and watch fishes in clear greeny pools. The beauty makes her eyes mist. This is why she loves being alone.
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 4 Responses Jul 9, 2011

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    OH – MY – GOSH – YES – THERE – IS

    – A – SANTA. Something made me watch BECOMING SANTA, a movie for which I had seen no recommendation at all, other than the fact that it is a Christmas movie. It turned out to be about 'real world' guys who play Santa. I stuck with it, all the while thinking how odd it...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F 3 Responses Dec 11, 2013

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    Know My Heart

    Why do I pray? Do I pray to say I prayed an hour? Why do I love? Do I want you beholden to me? Why do I help? Do I help to hear my name called out? And why do I sing? Search me and know my heart, Oh God. See if there is any wrong thing in me All I have ever really wanted...
    MorningBreeze MorningBreeze 56-60, F 2 Responses Aug 7, 2011

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    The Mystic's Pain

    If the sky were to become purple-black and rain searing green fire all ‘round, it would have nothing to do with the the feelings in a mystic’s heart.    But when he makes an opening between his fingers and looks out, he hears our cries--our suffering because we haven’t...
    nelladell nelladell 70+, F May 15, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    I don´t heart every comment my posts may get just because...I do it when I agree and only if they are not impolite or aggressive...I usually delete them or reply appropiately...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F 1 Response 5 hrs ago

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    So today Dylan and I started out… lets just say, “not conected”. So, I was late to spanish class. Dylan was just staring at me out the door. I opened it and closed it quietly...
    GoldMarine GoldMarine 18-21, F 4 hrs ago

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    I put up a poster of my self as someone who does not have a hearty and doesn't care about anyone but himself.but in reality I love my family and all those around me and would...
    gibranali099 gibranali099 13-15, M 4 hrs ago

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    There's this man at work, he is so kind to me and so thoughtful , we always talk about everything and sometimes he would say good things about me and even asked my best friend...
    nbsbgal nbsbgal 22-25, F 5 hrs ago

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    Those words you said "I want to remain as friends" and "I knew you liked me for a while" took me by surprise. I didn't know what they until a couple of hours later when I finally...
    Evoriya Evoriya 16-17, F Dec 1

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    I didn't mean to fall in love with him--I just did. He was just a schoolmate back in College. But ever since one of my classmates said that we looked good together, my suffering...
    ayamesan16 ayamesan16 22-25, F 2 Responses Dec 10

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    Before getting into it, some background: I have grown cold over the years, to the point where I dont even feel emotion at all at the pain or death of friends and family (with one...
    MrWinstonSmith MrWinstonSmith 22-25, M Dec 6

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    So it I've been having them since June of this year. I started with chest pressure and pain and had those skipped or hard beats feeling in my heart. I ended up getting an ekg and...
    Triforce89 Triforce89 22-25, M Nov 18

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    going to school ,wearing a beautiful smile, full of excitement , holding a breath for a seconds before entering my room.listening well to the lesson ,answering those questions...
    davinesarah davinesarah 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 21

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    It's such a devastating experience to have a broken heart.. The physical and emotional turmoil is so deep no words can accurately say. Physically if one has a heart attack medicine...
    Beanbella Beanbella 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 2

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    ou should know what I mean by that, the lady who takes everything on the chin and then backs his behaviour up by convincing herself that ‘he doesn't mean to be like that’..’i...
    pristee88 pristee88 22-25, F Dec 2

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    Actions and motives are different.every thing done for personal advantage not for common good is a calculating thought that requires a calculating mind.1sam2:3 says 'talk no more...
    simsym simsym 22-25 5 days ago

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    This heart it seems was split in two and no one ever blinked The blood it sprayed on a cold hard ground and seeped right through the sheets This heart it had been torn in half and...
    InsanityIsTheButterflysDrug InsanityIsTheButterflysDrug 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 3

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    My walled up heartI have a wall you cannot seeBecause its deep inside of me.It blocks my heart on every sideAnd helps emotions there to hide.You cant reach in,I cant reach out,You...
    kimmygary kimmygary 26-30, F 25 Responses Dec 6

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    Last night was the hardest night of my life. Almost three years ago, I met a wonderful man. Clever, intelligent, funny, respectful : someone a lot of women would call perfect. He...
    FromDuskTillDawn FromDuskTillDawn 22-25 Dec 8

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    I honestly am probably going to get annoying with everything I am writing or will write but I don't know what else to do. Everything else I want to do is not healthy and I don't...
    searchingfar searchingfar 22-25, F 3 days ago

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    How long does it take? How long until you can forget? Can you even forget, is it possible? I love him so much.. I never believed in true love, let alone soul mates, until he came...
    xRiax xRiax 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I'm seeing him for the first time a good two to three weeks. Oh how i've longed to feel his soft embrace and shrink into his chest. I long too feel him tighten his arms around me...
    cydneyxx cydneyxx 13-15, F Nov 30

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    I think every moment is going to be different. Some days I will feel strong and okay and others I will cry my eyes out. This is much like my last heart break. Same in many ways. it...
    searchingfar searchingfar 22-25, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I just opened the holiday card I was going to send. I wrote it new thanksgiving before things turned to ****.... Sweetie, Will you be my holiday sweetheart? I wish we could kiss...
    searchingfar searchingfar 22-25, F 2 days ago

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    Got a beautiful surprise this morning. But yet, you still gave me that look, or maybe because you're tired.... I was really happy to see you. Wish you knew it. Everybody knows it...
    DaddysGirl24 DaddysGirl24 22-25, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    My heart loved you pretty fast. My love was not a sexual love either, yet it was more than a friend. The love I have for you is just different than any love I have ever felt. My...
    TheBlessedOne TheBlessedOne 46-50, F 3 Responses Nov 18

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    It was through my daughter I learned to love. Until that moment I didn't understand what it meant to love, a most unselfish of emotions. She made what had been dark, light. I knew...
    EverlyAnn EverlyAnn 31-35, F Nov 20

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    How do I know if you love me. I here the words you say but I worry over the years will you heart go astray. I never desire perfection just hold my hand lets go in the same...
    quito1969 quito1969 41-45, M Nov 24

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    To my dearest King, Maybe I am not allowed to call you like this. This is the end of my dreams .I’ve reached a dead end. I have nowhere to go and no one to talk to. I’m broken...
    Anbarasi Anbarasi 18-21, F Nov 28

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    I have an incredible boyfriend now, but it doesn't erase memories of my ex. I met a guy in high school, let's call him Tom (not real name). He burned my skin the first time we hung...
    BrokenAndBetrayed612 BrokenAndBetrayed612 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 30

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    I have a deep sadness within my heart. I know those that are connection with their heart can understand and feel what I have written, but sadly I cannot, and ye understand this. I...
    JavierHunting JavierHunting 18-21, M 4 Responses Nov 30

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    On Monday November 17th, 2014, I lost my loving 53 year old dad to a heart attack. Four of them, rather. I'm only 15. My dad has been smoking for 30 years and has never been to a...
    Dianadacc Dianadacc 13-15, F Dec 2

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    On Monday November 17th, 2014, I lost my loving 53 dad to a heart attack. Four of them, rather. I'm only 15. My dad has been smoking for 30 years and has never been to a doctor...
    Dianadacc Dianadacc 13-15, F Dec 2

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    On Monday November 17th, 2014, I lost my loving 53 dad to a heart attack. Four of them, rather. I'm only 15. My dad has been smoking for 30 years and has never been to a doctor...
    Dianadacc Dianadacc 13-15, F Dec 2

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    Cancel