I Left A Sexless Marriage

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 78 People

    Happy St. Patrick's Day!

    I finished my workout and am waiting for my BF to come over. We're going on a date to a local Irish pub. - I kind of had a moment of realization the other day. I've been so focused on my move and transitioning to my new job; I'm alone...not lonely, but alone in a by myself kind...
    PinkJeanie1970 PinkJeanie1970
    46-50, F
    1 Response Mar 17

    I'm out. Fully out. In my own house with my

    daughter. The divorce isn't final legally.. But emotionally, mentally and physically it's done. The transition was made and life has settled in. If I could wish for one thing... Anything that could have saved me from the torment of withholding sex, partnership, friendship...
    BijouBlue BijouBlue
    41-45, F
    17 Responses Apr 30, 2015

    Haven't Been Happier

    I am free. Free of the crap, the hurt, the pain. I am living. Living the life I always dreamed. I am myself. Without fear and ridicule. I am worthy. Worthy of love and all that comes with it. I am hopeful. I know my future is bright. I am inspired. I know I can make it on my own...
    jcue1976 jcue1976
    31-35, F
    7 Responses Jul 29, 2011

    I am almost to a point

    where I can finally say I'm in opposite land. - I was offered a really nice job in my BF's city. I'm still wrapping my head around the upcoming, extremely positive changes. The job and employer seem to be a good fit for me. I'm not settling for a position. My name will actually...
    PinkJeanie1970 PinkJeanie1970
    46-50, F
    4 Responses Feb 11

    I left my marriage of 15 years 5 months ago.

    He is very overweight, 100% no libido and ED, and we had tried marriage counseling, meds, separations, I had left for a couple months and been with other guys. He's a great, over the top amazing person. I really felt he was my soulmate. He is the funniest person I know. I had so...
    Nix820 Nix820
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Jan 12

    As the puzzle pieces from the past 6 years

    start to fall together... An ugly ugly picture is being formed. It's interesting how when you are in the middle of something, you can't see the forest through the trees. Now that I've been out for awhile and have been seeking therapy I can see and what a sight it is! The...
    BijouBlue BijouBlue
    41-45, F
    18 Responses Jun 7, 2015

    Something has happened to Narcissus!

    A few nights ago he started to threaten and harass me with his "intimidating" contemptuous tone. He lost his cool demeanor and his rage came through. Although in a controlled way. I got pushed into a corner and I yelled back, which at that point he threatened to call the cops on...
    BijouBlue BijouBlue
    41-45, F
    32 Responses Apr 1, 2015

    Best decision ever! A bit late in joining this

    EP group because the fact is i left my SM nearly a year ago. There is life - lots of it - on the other side. Won't even care to look back at it. Thanks to my EPeeps for all their support. Onward I go.
    DolphinSmiles DolphinSmiles
    41-45, M
    1 Response May 14, 2014

    Yesterday, I met one of my mentors

    for a late lunch; I'm moving and I wanted to see her before I relocate. She's 77 years old and has been divorced for almost 20 years. She told me her daughter thinks she hates her ExH. But, she said, "I hated him when I married him. I don't hate him now. Hate requires emotion...
    PinkJeanie1970 PinkJeanie1970
    46-50, F
    3 Responses Feb 24

    So what have I learned?

    A **** ton. Am I glad I left? Hell yes. Is my daughter thriving? she's doing better then she was before. Do I feel different? I feel alive. Is it scary? Not anymore Is there happiness out there? Absolutely Is the change difficult? Surprisingly.. No. Is the change positive? In...
    BijouBlue BijouBlue
    41-45, F
    16 Responses Aug 6, 2015

    So I was part of the sexless marriage group

    from 2008, I have now been divorced for almost a year. At the time I finally decided on a divorce he was seeing 8 other women, some sexual some mental but all secretly. He had a phone just for his ******! March 2014 I had found out he was having an affair with a family friend...
    spiderb spiderb
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jan 23

    Ready To Date!

    Finally, I left that senseless marriage and am ready to date! The new found freedom is wonderful, rejuvenating, exciting!
    ncdude ncdude
    51-55, M
    1 Response May 28, 2013

    I didn't have a well-thought out plan

    when the Ex left me in November. When I agreed it was for the best, he made it difficult. It was emotionally difficult in the sense that he tried to smear my reputation amongst my family and peers. I disconnected from mutual friends and colleagues because of his toxic comments...
    PinkJeanie1970 PinkJeanie1970
    46-50, F
    Jun 25, 2015

    It's true.. Controlling people do not like to

    lose control. They will do anything to maintain the illusion of control. I say illusion because they fool themselves into thinking by behaving in avoidant, passive and hostile ways they have control. All they have from these behaviors is a person on the other end who thinks less...
    BijouBlue BijouBlue
    41-45, F
    21 Responses Mar 30, 2015

    Seeking Advice

    Hi All, I haven't left my SM yet but I have an exit strategy in place which 'should' be ready by the end of the year. I think I have thought of most things but I was wondering if any of you have any advice? I am looking for advice and/or tips as to what to expect as I am...
    Minxii Minxii
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Jun 5, 2013

    I tried and tried to get her to understand,

    we read marriage books and even went to counselling but she never GOT it. Career was and is still more important. I finally could take no more and divorced her last year and she has yet to tell me she was sorry. We are friends but that is all there is after 12 years. I have...
    TNnomad TNnomad
    61-65, M
    2 Responses Feb 9

    My best friend shared something with me today.

    It was somewhat mind boggling. She knows I lived in a SM for years, and how frustrating the refusal was and the epic struggles I had with maintaining marital fidelity and wanting a, "whole" marriage. She shared with me how she is the refuser in her marriage. She wants sex, but...
    PinkJeanie1970 PinkJeanie1970
    46-50, F
    3 Responses Jan 5

    I have to remember the slivers of gold in my

    former marriage, but I have no regrets about leaving my SM.
    PinkJeanie1970 PinkJeanie1970
    46-50, F
    1 Response Sep 21, 2015

    Best Decision Ever!

    Two years ago, I left my husband of 12 years. I had always felt deprived throughout our time together, even during dating. Our marriage had been more or less sexless the last 5 years of marriage. It took it's toll on me. My ex was a very kind and caring man. He was never mean...
    sofiek sofiek
    41-45
    3 Responses Dec 19, 2012

    I left a sexless marriage 6 years ago

    and I have no regrets at all. It was the best decision I could have made at the time. He was a selfish and heartless man and made me feel so unwanted and undesirable. It was awful feeling so dead inside and completely worthless and devalued. Yet, I somehow found the courage...
    WiltedTulip WiltedTulip
    46-50, F
    3 Responses Apr 15, 2015

    I officially left my sexless marriage this past

    weekend. Best thing I've ever done. Don't get me wrong I still love my STBX but couldn't take his non-caring attitude anymore. I felt myself getting deeper and deeper in a bad place. Both my daughter and I are much better spirits in just a couple days. I didn't realize how...
    Blackangel Blackangel
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Apr 7, 2015

    Not As Advertised

    My ex husband was a great fan of mine. He took care to cook, and bestow thoughtful gifts, frequently. During our two-year courtship, the sex was great, often whole weekends spent in bed, and he was a dependable guy as well. As soon as we moved in together, no so much. Honeymoon...
    junomoon junomoon
    51-55, F
    5 Responses Jul 11, 2011
More Stories