A Bad Pastor - A pastor was praying for a man possessed with a demon, He says.... In the name of Jesus say what you want this man & come out of him!! the demon answer, 'I want...
I have always liked the Joker. I am particularly fond of Heath Ledger's joker because I don't feel he is as crazy as he is smart. He's a genius. I used to not embrace this because...
A Man sharing a joke with his girl friend ! How sweet :)Jokes are typically for the entertainment of friends and onlookers. The desired response is generally laughter; when this...
Received this from a good friend ... sooo true.. lol
Advantages Of Being A Woman
1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return...
That a look lol good morning lol
Why are you yelling that?
A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job.
In the first room, she said she would like a pale blue.
The contractor wrote this down...
A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the...
I really like joking around and quoting comedy movies. Does anyone else do this? Or have sing alongs to the radio?
If only I could be like him, I'd be able to embrace my true identity. But then where would I end up? Seems scary but fun :)
There was a boy who liked a blonde and so one day he finally got the courage to ask her out. He said "Would you go out with me?"
She looked confused and said "Where are we...
Here is one for all you lady's out there ! Try not to slam me over it bahahaha ! Smh
A man comes home from work and his wife greets him at the door and asks, "Is dinner ready yet?!?" She grabs him and points across the street as a husband comes home and tenderly...
On the night of their honeymoon, a newlywed couple has an unfortunate accident, resulting in the amputation of the groom's left foot. Unable to control her grief, the bride calls...
W.O.R.K. - A Highly Dangerous Virus
When I was 14, all I wanted was a girl with big boobs
When I was 16, I dated a girl with big boobs but there was no passion. So I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for...
A blonde get's in her car and notices her steering wheel, dashboard, and windshield is missing. She calls the police and reports a theft. When the police officer comes, he looks at...
How do you kill a blonde?
Put a mirror at the bottom of a pool.
M & M Factory
Q: Why did the dumb blonde get fired from the M&M
A: Because she throw away all the w's
A blonde got a deck of playing cards as a gift but she
couldn't find anyone to play solitaire with.
Do you know where you were going?
A policeman pulled a blonde over after he/she'd been driving the wrong way on a one-way street.
Cop: Do you know where you were going?
What's in the bag?
A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde robbed a supermarket. As they were stealing, a police officer walked in the store and saw what was happening. He dashed...
Two blondes went to the pound where each adopted a puppy. The joy of their new best friend was quickly overshadowed when they got home and the first blonde said, "I think we're in...
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks.
The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks."
The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks...
Two blondes are driving to Disneyland. As they get close, they see a road sign that says, "Disneyland, left." So they turned around and went home.
Three women are about to be executed for crimes. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blonde.
Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has...
Q: What does a blonde have in common with a noodle?
A: They both wiggle when you eat them.
Q: What's the Blonde's cheer?
A: " I'm blonde, I'm blonde, I'm B.L.O.N....ah, oh well.. I'm blonde, I'm blonde, yea yea yea..."
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator?
A: The blonde works in the dark!
Q: What stops then goes then stops then goes?
A: A blonde at a blinking red light.
Q: There are 17 blonds standing outside a nightclub but why couldn't they get in?
A: The sign said "must be 18 to enter".
small things may discover to us our real and unreal friends who say we are best friends to you.
What's the best tv series you've watched? I mean the one you'd recommand to someone?
I was happy until I was five. My goals were to keep my parents and grand parents alive and safe forever, because that was what they did for me. I didn't worry about my death...
Tell me a good joke ! I need a good laugh :)
I love a good joke or story. I love to laugh :)
Q: Why do men like blonde jokes?
A: Because they can understand them.
All of my "best" friends are people who can make me laugh at any time. I hate always having to be the friend who makes the "good" jokes, sometimes I just want to bask in another's...
Love guys that can make me laugh. Anyone has any good jokes??
Winston Churchill, “We Shall Fight on the Beaches”
June 4, 1940; House of Commons, London
I have, myself, full confidence that if all do their duty, if...
Good looks don't last forever. But personality tells you a story about the person you are getting to know. I like to know things about the person I am getting to know because then...
A witch joke
What do you call a witch who drives really badly?
A road hag!
A witch joke
What kind of jewellry do warty witches wear on their wrists?
Q: Do you want to hear a joke about sodium?
That was a bad chemistry joke because all the good ones Argon.
I am not very good at remembering jokes but here are two I heard on a show last night.
What do you call 32 hillbillies in a room?
A full set of teeth. Lol
What's better than...
I hate the feeling of returning to reality after finishing an awesome book... Even worse the entire sequel. It's like, you don't know what do with your life anymore :(
One boring Monday morning, Mr. Akpos, our English teacher entered the class and addressed us. He started; "Lets show the principal and our guest how much we have learnt so far this...
I love funny people :)It’s true, think about it. Who are you friends with? Chances are that it is the people who you have the most in common with — who you have the...
Sister Margaret was a model nun all of her life, until she was called to get her just rewards. As she approached the pearly gates, Saint Peter said "Hold on, Sister Margaret...not...
There was an American, Canadian, and let's say Chinese were on a plane. (not to offend anyone or be racist).
The American dropped a penny on his country and said "good luck for my...
This is long but well worth reading the whole thing.
The Yellow Shirt
The yellow shirt had long sleeves, four extra-large pockets trimmed in black thread and snaps up the front...
Write this one down
Knock, knock Who's there?
You ever hear the joke about the broken pencil?
You ever hear the joke about the broken pencil who?
Nevermind, it's pointless.
During a cocktail in Washington, two guests strike up a conversation. After exchanging small talk, one of them said:
* Do you know the last joke about the White House...
I've always wanted to do Stand-up Comedy ever since I was little, like to make people laugh and see them smile with a good feelin in them. My favorite shows were "Mind of Mencia...
In the beginning God created the heaven and the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Devil said, "It doesn't get any...