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I Like Good Joke

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    A Bad Pastor

     A pastor was praying for a man possessed with a demon, He says.... In the name of Jesus say what you want this man & come out of him!! the demon answer, 'I want him to win the America lotto draw worth $400 billion tonight' The pastor lower the microphone and whispers, In Jesus...
    Opiah1 Opiah1 18-21, M Jun 20, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 2

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    So there's this man with a parrot. And his parrot swears like a sailor, I mean he's a pistol. He can swear for five minutes straight without repeating himself. The trouble is that...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 7

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    Q: How do you make an idiot laugh on boxing day? A: Tell him a joke on Christmas Eve!
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Jul 11

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    in astronomy class... le teacher: why are there rings on saturn? le student: kus god liked it so he put a ring on it le teacher: god is not a single lady badum tss
    mike8989 mike8989 22-25, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I could honestly say you've been on my mind Since I woke up today I look at your photograph all the time These memories come back to life And I don't mind I remember when we...
    jeannetjayy jeannetjayy 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 18

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    Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me < 3
    lottie1996 lottie1996 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 19

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    My friend and I had been friends for over 6 years. But when we started secondary school she changed. She wasn't her usual self anymore. She bullied me severely, I was pushed to...
    DreamingOfSunsets DreamingOfSunsets 16-17, F 1 Response 23 hrs ago

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    Don't ever say goodbye , that means bye for forever . Say cya later so the other person knows your not leaving
    alyssabay alyssabay 13-15, F Jul 18

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    The most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said and never explained.
    ConcealedWildheart ConcealedWildheart 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 19

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    I like watching crime scene investigation versions and bones when I'm doing ironing at the weekend
    LeahNl LeahNl 31-35, F Jul 19

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    My friend got fired from his job selling home security systems. If no one was home, he would leave a brochure on the kitchen table.
    Ludwigdrummerboy Ludwigdrummerboy 61-65, M 1 Response Jul 2

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    We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next Twenty-four years telling them to sit down and shut up!
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 3

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    When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker's circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 6

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    A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. "What are those machetes doing in your car?" asks the cop. "I juggle them in my act." "Oh, yeah? Says the...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 8

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    Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: don't step on the ducks!" So they enter heaven...
    run23456 run23456 46-50, M 1 Response Jul 10

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    There was a show opening up for the elephant man, my girlfriend went over to see and they thought she was making a guest appearance.
    DatRandomGinger DatRandomGinger 16-17, M Jul 18

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    When I awoke this morning, the air was soft and still. A little robin came and sat upon my window sill. He tipped his head and looked at me, with eyes so bright and clear...
    Byron8by7 Byron8by7 46-50, M a week ago

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    A traveling salesman was held up by a bad storm in the Hawaiian Islands. He sent an e-mail to his corporate headquarters advising them that he was stranded for a few days and...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    A mother carefully explained to her young daughter how children were created. She used the expression “carrying a child” instead of “pregnant,” but the girl seemed...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 14

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    Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!" "But why, Mom? I don't want to go." "Give me two reasons why you don't want...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 14

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    A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M Jul 15

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    This is something I'd totally do. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2us9iBZ-tQ&list=UUnOVVuoLJ_1YY8A0V802wHA&index=69
    Guuuu Guuuu 18-21, M Jul 7

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    One day I'm going to have to hack into the Pentagon . Jk...
    Living2Heights Living2Heights 13-15, F Jul 11

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    Blonde Sunday Q: Why did the blonde think it was Sunday? A: Because the sun was out.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Jul 18

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    **** gays, lesbians, transgenders, pansexuals, bi's, and heterosexuals...**** everybody lol
    georgefootball123 georgefootball123 16-17, M Jul 19

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    I read in my.local newspaper that the toilet was stolen from our Police station.., if you can believe that! The cops have nothing to go on! Bawhahaha! LOL
    AlwaysGood AlwaysGood 51-55, M 3 days ago

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    A new widow requested the epitaph "Rest in Peace" for her husband's tombstone. When she later found he had left his fortune to his mistress, she attempted to get the engraver to...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Why don't cannibals eat clowns? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ Because they taste funny!
    thisisdave thisisdave 31-35, M 2 days ago

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    What did the cannibal get when he arrived late to the party? A cold shoulder! 💀
    ThatDarnKatz ThatDarnKatz 16-17, F 2 days ago

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    The things that come to those who wait may be the things left by those who got there first. 😃😄👍
    lemongrass09 lemongrass09 46-50, F 2 Responses Jun 28

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    Great show!! Does anyone know if this show would be in hulu or Netflix ? It would be DYNO -MITE!!! If someone could tell me. Thanks :)
    AquariusLife AquariusLife 26-30, F Jul 3

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    Tonight I bleed myself dry. I bleed myself dry. I bleed myself dry. And nothing I could ever write, would help you understand this life There's so much beauty when your eyes lay...
    scarredbutrelentless scarredbutrelentless 18-21, M Jul 7

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    I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted I thought about our last kiss, how it felt the way you tasted And even though your friends tell me you're doing fine...
    nailwire nailwire 16-17, F Jul 7

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    I don't need no arms around me I don't need no drugs to calm me I have seen the writing on the wall Don't think I need anything at all No don't think I'll need anything at all...
    blackmountainside blackmountainside 13-15, F Jul 8

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    "If you don't know where you want to go, then it doesn't matter which path you take" - Alice in Wonderland
    RCardos RCardos 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 8

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    Ship is always safe at shore but that is not what it's built for
    nevergiveup99 nevergiveup99 16-17, M 3 Responses Jul 13

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    And life's just all a game, And we're here to play. But surely and slowly, I think that this flame has burned out. And I've seen what life does. Don't remind us That we can't...
    scarredbutrelentless scarredbutrelentless 18-21, M Jul 15

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    They can bite too hard. Or never come from jerks. Or require we lie about liking jerks. They really bite too hard.
    converted converted 46-50, M Jul 18

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    Life is a walk to remember. Our tomorrows are determined by the steps we take each day. Every sunset gives us one day less to live but every sunrise gives us one day more to hope...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 18

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    I watched one tree hill, prison break, now I'm watching Lincoln heights
    hennyforyourthoughts hennyforyourthoughts 18-21, F Jul 19

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    East Bound and Down hands down is the funniest show I have watched in a long time. Just bought all 3 seasons
    LoudProudCountry LoudProudCountry 22-25, M 3 days ago

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    Many people often doubt the powers of prayer. But God is there- listening. Satan wants you to throw in the towell on praying. But don't. Keep praying. God answers those who are...
    PrayerWarriorTeen PrayerWarriorTeen 13-15, F 14 hrs ago

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    Once upon a time I was on whisper ( an app that let's you tell secrets with out people knowing who you are)and I was looking up posts about suicide .One was of a girl/boy who was...
    rachelmu22 rachelmu22 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 18

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    Good books, like good friends, are few and chosen; the more select, the more enjoyable. Louisa May Alcott
    Katanakat Katanakat 46-50, M Jul 15

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    Oldie but goodie. ★★★★★★★★★ Adam and Eve said, 'Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome...
    vector8 vector8 46-50, F 4 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    THE EVE OF CREATION One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!" "What's the problem, Eve?" God asks her. "Lord," she says, "I know you've...
    ferrer95 ferrer95 18-21, F 2 Responses 7 hrs ago

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