“He speaks English, Spanish, and he’s bilingual too.”
— Don King
“It’s really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people.”
- Axl Rose
Questions And Answers - "Violence is never the answer. It's the question, and the answer is always 'yes'."
Australia's Imports - «Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.»
- Keppel Enderbery,
Former Australian cabinet minister
“Carbon dioxide is portrayed as harmful. But there isn’t even one study that can be produced that shows that carbon dioxide is a harmful gas.”
~ Rep. Michele Bachmann
«I'm not anorexic. I'm from Texas. Are there people from Texas that are anorexic? I've never heard of one. And that includes me.»
— Jessica Simpson
Newspaper Quotes - According to Colonial War Memorial Hospital staff the woman was brought in after the accident by witnesses at the scene and was taken for obliteration.
Stupid Celeb Quotes - Mariah Carey: “Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I’d love to be skinny like that but...
Worst Pick Up Line Ever? - CHRIS BROWN. The singer, who pleaded guilty in 2009 to felony assault for attacking then-girlfriend Rihanna, is apparently making light of the...
Balanced Diet - «Food is an important part of a balanced diet.»
- Fran Lebowitz, US writer
I Used To Have An Open Mind But My Brains Keep Falling Out - I say no to drugs, but they don’t listen.
If aliens are looking for intelligent life?! WHY THE HECK ARE YOU SCARED...
You Believe!! - "I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe -- I believe what I believe is right."
--Rome, Italy, July 22...
"I think the team that wins Game 5 will win the series. Unless we lose Game 5."
- Charles Barkley, NBA Basketball Player
Well More Funny- Blackadder - "We're in a sticky situation all right. This is the stickiest situation since Sticky the Stick insect got caught on a sticky bun."
"The internet is a great way to get on the net."
- Bob Dole, Republican presidential candidate
"Pitching is 80% of the game. The other half is hitting and fielding."
- Mickey Rivers, baseball player.
“The word ‘genius’ isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”
— Joe Theismann
Gotta Laugh - Gotta laugh,Some quotes,Funny,Stupid,Regardless,I like 'em.
“I mean, part of the beauty of me is that I’m very rich.”
- Donald Trump
"Does the album have any songs you like that aren't on it?
- Harry News, music reviewer
Do Signs Qualify As Quotes? Here Are Some Stupid Ones - PARKING IN REAR
Welcome to taco bell - now hiring all *****
New sour doug bacon cheese burger available
Stop mice with...
“I was asked to come to Chicago because Chicago is one of our fifty-two states.”
— Racquel Welch
“When you say I committed adultery, are you stating before the marriage of 1996 or prior to?”
— Dallas Cowboys cornerback Deion Sanders
*Shocked* - For most people, death comes at the end of their lives.
- GLR broadcaster, UK
"We are sorry to announce that Mr. Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is taking a short holiday to recover."
- Parish Magazine
Ice Cube? - That's just the tip of the ice cube.
- Neil Hamilton, BBC2
Geography/History Lesson - We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice...
Smoking Kills - «Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.»
- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal...
Re:Stupid Quotes - 640K ought to be enough for anybody.
Bill Gates, 1981
Reporters, Reporters!! - "Sometimes they write what I say and not what I mean."
- baseball Player Pedro Guerrero on reporters.
Wow ... News! - I have a God-given talent. I got it from my dad.
- Julian Wakefield, Missouri basketball player
Warning This Story Is Not Safe For Kids - James Joyce is regarded as one of the most important writers of the 1900s and his novel Ulysses is considered the epitome of Modernist...
But obviously we've gotta stand with our North Korean allies
- Sarah Palin
"People hate me because I am a multifaceted, talented, wealthy, internationally famous genius."
- Jerry Lewis, comedian
"A proof is a proof. What kind of proof? It's a proof. A proof is proof. And when you have a good proof, it's because it is proven."
- Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chrétien
“If Lincoln were alive today, he’d be turning over in his grave.
~ Gerald Ford (on Nixon and Watergate)
In the News - "Reports are sketchy, but we have heard that in the first heart transplant operation in Belgium, both patient and donor are doing fine."
- Radio news...
Fight! - I'll fight Lloyd Honeyghan for nothing, if the price is right.
- Marlon Starling
FORMER First Lady - Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.
"Cod are not very good swimmers so they are easily overtaken by trawlers and nets."
- British government report on why cod fish are disappearing from the North Sea
“I feel the best way to ensure Americans’ freedom is to tighten restrictions on that freedom in any way possible. Only through wiretaps, illegal searches and seizures...
“It’s not that I dislike many people. It’s just that I don’t like many people.”
— Bryant Gumbel
"I'm like the Pythagorean theorem, I can't be solved"
~ Shaquille O' Neal
A Computer Classic - "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943
“There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled...
“When I see a 9/11 victim family on television, or whatever, I’m just like, ‘Oh shut up’ I’m so sick of them because they’re always complaining.”
~ Glenn Beck
«For NASA, space is still a high priority.»
- Dan Quayle
"Don't fear the terrorists. They're mothers and fathers."
- Rosie O'Donnell
What A Big Organ! - “When a physician removes a child from a woman, that is the largest organ in a body. That’s a big thing. That’s a big surgery. You don’t have any other...
“Rarely is the question asked, is our children learning?”
— George W. Bush
Knee Surgery Where? - I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.
- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward
He Talks Too Much, Huh? - "Too caustic?" To hell with the cost. If it's a good picture, we'll make it
«We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?»
- Lee Iacocca, Chairman of the Chrysler corporation