Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device
This experience may contain mature content, as flagged by the community.
Please click away if you do not want to see this content.
To report inappropriate content, please email us.

I Live In a Sexless Marriage

Support, stories, and advice from real married men and women without sex in their marriage. 50,313 People

    So after a really bad couple of months I took

    my wife to the doctor and got her some anti-depressants and she has been a lot better recently - happier, more engaged and more open. It was a bad one, though, and I think it really rubbed in her face just how traumatised and intimacy-averse she actually is. She is now doing...
    unmatched unmatched 41-45, M 7 Responses 4 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Live Your Relationship Authentically, And Let Go The Outcome.

      A theme in my own formerly sexless marriage and most of the others I see in this board who have not yet changed their situation at home, is a lack of authenticity in their and communications with each other.   I see and have experienced magical thinking within dysfunctional...
    Apocrypha Apocrypha 36-40 43 Responses Jan 11, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Another massive argument/slanging match.

    This time he's the victor and I'm licking my wounds. I keep hearing in my head.... "This IS all you fault, you brought this on. This your fault, you are to blame". Again and again. Its like my self concious has abandoned me too. Its like its easier to blame myself.....I must...
    lass1 lass1 41-45, F 17 Responses 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Married a Narcissist - As part of my

    post-separation healing, I’ve been reading up on narcissistic personality disorders, and I’ve discovered a treasure trove of information that’s helped me understand a key source of the dysfunction in my marriage. So many of us chase the “why” in our crumbling...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 6 Responses 12 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Are You Staying For The Kids? Some Thoughts From Someone Who Left.

    One of the most common refrains here seems to be the line "I love my kids" or "I love my family", or "I don't want to destroy my family". There are plenty of reasons to not get divorced. If your sexless period was just a bump in the road, only 6 months, a year, right after...
    icancounttopotato icancounttopotato 36-40, M 64 Responses Jan 6, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Please...listen

    As I sit on my patio, sipping coffee and reading a book, I marvel at the calm of my being. Serenity, happiness, confidence. That is now my life. I am alone. But, I am in no hurry. When I eventually find that person for me, he will behold a whole person, not a broken one. I can't...
    imathinkin imathinkin 51-55, F 58 Responses May 14, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel
    sunnysokhal sunnysokhal 26-30, M 1 Response 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I just came across an article callex "Sexual

    Desire Descrepancy" that I think might be helpful to some of you. Here's the link: http://www.lehmiller.com/blog/2015/7/23/he-says-i-dont-want-it-enough-i-think-he-wants-it-too-much-dealing-with-a-sexual-desire-discrepancy
    SoftWillie SoftWillie 61-65, M 4 Responses 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    There are numerous older men in the world

    who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to find women for dating and companionship. The spokesperson reports that many older men have started finding perfect companions through their...
    alliecc11 alliecc11 26-30, F 1 Response 5 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    sunnysokhal sunnysokhal 26-30, M 3 Responses 20 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I recently found out my husband is cheating.

    He went to Bali to meet someone he met online. My son confronted him few months while he Skyped her. He explained to my son that he is having some problem with me. Son was very distraught & need to confide. He told his friends upon advice of kids helpline. I suspected as we had...
    cpep8 cpep8 51-55, F 30 Responses 3 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    sunnysokhal sunnysokhal 26-30, M 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Monday morning humor I just had a tough

    weekend with the man. . Before you all scold me for staying in the situation and tell me it's my own fault - STOP. I've heard that before. I know. . This isn't going to be a rant or a sob session. . The therapist I saw suggested writing him a letter. . Today, it's Monday - I'm...
    SmartKat SmartKat 46-50, F 78 Responses Feb 9

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Unexpected, Unwarranted And Unwanted.

    Earlier this year, I made my decision to pursue an affair. This option has since morphed into an exit plan from my marriage, but either way, my goal is the same. Have some sex. To that end, not having been seen naked by another man for over twenty years (for the most part), I...
    birdie39 birdie39 41-45, F 52 Responses Sep 10, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Outsourcing Your Needs

    So you live in a sexless marriage.  There is no sex (or very little sex) and your relationship lacks intimacy and emotional connection.   As a "sex person" you miss this badly and have tried, without success, to address the issue in your marriage. You love your spouse, who is...
    enna30 enna30 56-60, F 232 Responses Apr 2, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Perhaps An Insight Into the Guy's Problem...

    All of the stories here are all too familiar. What's frustrating is that they all reflect a fundamental change in the relationship early on in a marriage...which fortunately, is something I might be able to help out with. Many guys get married before they really understand...
    TheTreeIsMe TheTreeIsMe 36-40, M 100 Responses Feb 13, 2007

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Wife Has No Desire

    My wife was sexually abused as a child.  This has caused devastating effects on our marriage and her life.  Deep down, my wife is afraid to love.  She grew up in a home where if you didn't take care of yourself, you weren't taken care of.  Her mother died at...
    stinkcat_14 stinkcat_14 41-45, M 197 Responses Aug 31, 2006

    Your Response

    Cancel

    There are numerous older men in the world

    who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to find women for dating and companionship. The spokesperson reports that many older men have started finding perfect companions through their...
    alliecc11 alliecc11 26-30, F 6 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I don't think my wife fancies me at all

    and I think she settled for me because I'm dependable and settle down material. Does anyone else have this kind of relationship?
    stuographer stuographer 36-40, M 11 Responses 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    All That Glitters...

    I have read many of the stories here, and many seem to run along a typical theme. I am going to add my thoughts to those who are living in a sexless marriage, as I am, but who also speak of love and friendship with their partners -- who say they have a wonderful, warm...
    deleted deleted 26-30 554 Responses Apr 18, 2008

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It Ain't So Important "What" You Choose - - - -

    - But it is critical that you DO choose. (Readers might choose to file this story under 'self indulgent bullshit) No-one gets a pass on choice - although we like to kid ourselves that we do, at times. That we are "helpless victims of circumstances". That we are "prisoners...
    bazzar bazzar 56-60, M 7 Responses 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Looking Back, Looking Forward

    A lot of people have probably assumed or accepted that if everything else seemed okay that the fault for a loveless, sexless marriage was theirs. You go to therapy, aggressively root out your problems, go to the gym, work on your attitude, learn some new jokes, set the...
    Gearcynic Gearcynic 36-40, M 46 Responses Aug 18, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's not so much sexless,

    as it is boring! Lol it's the same routine over and over 'we get nude, I lay down, he opens my legs, puts a condom on, does his thing, and it's done' :3
    HiddenAgendas69 HiddenAgendas69 31-35, F 13 Responses 12 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I had an ex 10 years ago,

    and we weren't the most lovey dovey perfect couple. I met up with her every weekend or so, and frankly, -I'll admit- I wasn't too into her. But my ex, on the other hand, was completely obsessed with me. Obsessed. I mean, I used to love her very much. She had the most tiny...
    ymmas777 ymmas777 22-25, M 6 Responses 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Last night at dinner my wife accused me of

    flirting with the waitress because I asked her to tell the manager to start carrying my beer again. Wife got irritated at the waitress because she never asked if wife wanted a refill on her beer. I offered to call the waitress over and wife refused. Her and my idea of flirting...
    dynamic71 dynamic71 41-45, M 5 Responses 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Leaving isn't the "easy way out.

    " I didn't leave my marriage because I didn't want to put in the necessary work to fix it. I left because it couldn't be fixed, and the work that comes with leaving is just as hard, and I would argue much harder.
    HelenTarnation HelenTarnation 41-45, F 5 Responses 7 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Am Already Gone, And He Doesn't Even Know It.

    He went to bed first, he's always tired. As I stood at the side of our bed and saw the barricade of pillows he placed between us, I debated leaving my night gown on. Why take it off? He won't even notice. I let the blue, sheer cotton gown float to my feet. I'll be more...
    deleted deleted 26-30 52 Responses Sep 29, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Dehumanization Of The Opposite Sex: The Collateral Damage Of A Sexless Marriage

    I had an epiphany a few days ago. I thought I would share it. My marriage and my appreciation for it goes in cycles. I believe this is the case for most of us. Some days are optimistic. Some are awful. Some...you just don't think about it. Sometimes those are the best days, when...
    harveyspecter harveyspecter 41-45, M 73 Responses Mar 18, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    No Sex Tonight - Best Of Craigslist

    I just wanted to share something that gave me a good laugh this morning. It was posted in the "best of craigslist" section of craigslist. I thought somebody else here may find it funny, too. I have found it is easier to cope with a sexless marriage if I ...
    CynicalFreakGenius CynicalFreakGenius 36-40, M 297 Responses Dec 20, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Three things not to do in a sexless marriage:

    based on mistakes I see in these stories, let me suggest three things not to do. 1: Don't ask for a divorce. When it is time to move on, don't tell them you want a divorce. Tell them you are divorcing them. You don't need their agreement or permission, at least in the US. This...
    PhinheasGage PhinheasGage 46-50, M 2 Responses 1 hr ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    All He Thought About Was SEX SEX SEX

     ORIGINAL STORY (2007): Reading all the posts here, I guess I represented the other side. I hadn't been having sex with my husband because I didn't want to. All he thought about was sex, but not just with me. He had adult magazines, DVDs and videos hidden all over the...
    LostLeila LostLeila 31-35, F 437 Responses Dec 27, 2007

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Zzzzya Zzzzya 46-50, M 1 Response 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I just got a message today from my husband’s

    ex-wife. She wants the children to know each other, which is awesome. I want them to continue knowing each other too. But she doesn’t feel safe with them coming to us, and staying here anymore. My husband, has complicated manners. Apparently, my husband has been telling his...
    darktippedrose darktippedrose 31-35, F 56 mins ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    "The Overwhelming Advice Is To Cheat Or Leave"

    This story was written in response to a statement in a recent post. That statement is: "The overwhelming advice is to cheat or leave". What it comes down to is this: when you reach the point where you can no longer tolerate being in a sexless relationship, then you will...
    enna30 enna30 56-60, F 43 Responses Nov 11, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Wishful Thinking Being sent to a place

    that is both very far away and very hot every time we raise the subject of intimacy can be confusing and devitalizing in the long run. Being asked to travel or otherwise reassemble in hell is somewhat hurtful too if for no other reason that we are already there and do not need...
    purezinc purezinc 36-40, M 10 Responses Feb 23, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So I started typing a lengthy response to

    unquotequote's recent story and decided to toss it out as my own story instead. I will not say that everything is great in my relationship, bar the lack of sex. It's not. And the lack of sex is a HUGE thing - I have a marriage lacking the thing that actually distinguishes...
    nerio nerio 46-50, F 9 Responses 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm one step closer to being free.

    I've finished moving out of my married home. It hasn't sold yet, but it will. Showings have picked up again now that Spring is here. I just don't have to deal with them anymore. Not having to deal with the showings, has been a huge stress reliever for me. It was hard leaving my...
    Itsmytime2be Itsmytime2be 41-45, F 37 Responses Mar 31

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Im sick of living in a sexless marriage

    and more sick o watching TV where the couples fall all over each other declaring how sexually beautiful they are. I think my husband has a lot of nerve to watch that rap when i ***** all the wAy through it! But mostly im pissed that he cant even take it as a tip to say...
    bonniblu bonniblu 46-50, F 10 Responses 23 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Hi I have a high sex drive

    and my wife is always tired She works night shift as a nurse Last week I slept with her mom Should I feel guilty ?
    hasha743 hasha743 26-30, M 13 Responses 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Alright.. we've been together

    for over 6 years and married for a year and a half. Of course just like everyone else our relationship was real good at first had sex before work and evsry night. Now maybe once a month. This all happened right after we had our daughter. I work my *** off pay the bills make good...
    Country87 Country87 26-30, M 7 Responses 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    http://www.justiceschanfarber.

    com/marriage-why-women-leave-cheat/
    andie2007 andie2007 41-45, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I stumbled upon this article

    and want to know your thoughts. http://www.thefemininewoman.com/2013/01/understanding-men-5-insights-on-men-to-ease-your-worries/
    sweetplumeria sweetplumeria 36-40 7 Responses 3 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    A Sexless Marriage (SM) Vs. A Loveless Marriage (LM):

    A Sexless Marriage (SM) vs. A Loveless Marriage (LM): It would be reasonable to assume that this forum is home to many who have a somewhat similar experience to share, one that is a close match to the title of this group. However I now firmly believe that the majority of people...
    purezinc purezinc 36-40, M 20 Responses Aug 17, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Wishful Thinking: Your partner may state

    they love you, but this is trick: remember that actions speak louder than words. The cruelty of all: I read many variants of the following: “Lack of intimacy with my partner makes me miserably unhappy, damages me psychologically and physically, I am desperate, I am going...
    purezinc purezinc 36-40, M 23 Responses Feb 2, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So Is It Really About Sex? What I Have Learned From A Long Term Sexless Marriage.

    I read the stories here and see so many similar people in differing stages of understanding of sexless marriages. Some newbies are seeking a fix or cure. The older, more jaded, group having affairs, leaving the marriage or both simultaneously. We all believe or once believed that...
    footballbat footballbat 46-50, M 48 Responses Oct 8, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    A Brief Affair Of Two EP Members

    I am a regular EP member but for anonimoty I agreed with her to create a new username so that I can write our story. This happened six weeks ago. Through a thread on the forum, I was contacted by an EP member who was travelling overseas and was going to be near my hometown for...
    waiting2feelalive waiting2feelalive 46-50 184 Responses Nov 28, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel