I Live In a Sexless Marriage Forum & Chat Board | Sleep in same bed

Do you and your spouse sleep in the same bed?  If not why not?

No. Nothing happens anyway, so may as well get a good sleep. Both of us sleep better alone.

Yes we sleep together.   Now that the kids are gone I had given thought to sleeping in one of the empty bedrooms, but I just can't do it.  

My wife has begged for seperate beds. She says I toss and turn too much in the night and she can't get a good sleep.

I can't get a good sleep either... because of the lack of affection and imitmacy

Why should I make her happy if I'm not?

We sleep in the same bed but under different duvets (actually quite common where we live). I did move into the guest room for five months last year and he begged me back with promises to change. I moved back...for nothing.

I don't time my bedtime with his anymore, don't make moves on him anymore and come to bed in pjs - it help if I have the mindset nothing going to happen, I don't get disappointed and I have great sleep instead of tossing and turning and wondering whats wrong with me. I have a few minutes of those thoughts but I just let them go now and drift off peacefully.

Yes we do. We sleep in the same bed. She says that it is hard for her to sleep when I am not next to her.

Sometimes I sneak out of bed after she falls asleep and go sleep on the couch for a while. I then wake up and come back to bed when I am in a sleeping stupor. I do this because it is hard to fall asleep when the object of your desire is right next to you.

It has been really hard the last year. She started wearing sexier tops to bed. Before you think that it is an invitation, they are just cotton camis. I thought she was sexy in a T-Shirt.

Yes we do, but like anthropod posted, I often get so frustrated I get up and watch TV or read EP until I'm so tired I can't keep my eyes open.  If I have to lay there in bed and think, I'll never get to sleep.

We share a bed, but I wish we didn't. I get the same line Anthro does: he can't sleep without me. Unfortunately, the only other bed we have is a futon on a different floor from my son or I would have moved by now. I spend the night tossing and turning and trying not to touch him. It just hurts to touch him now.

"touch him?"

Lord knows, That hasn't happened in so long ! Sad, isn't it?

His choice!

I envy you.  I still got to sleep with hopes that he will come to bed wanting me.  The lack of desire is very disheartening and makes a good night's sleep almost impossible, especially being that he can be very affectionate outside of the bedroom or any situation that might lead to sex.

Nope.  Haven't for a couple years now.  She sleeps on the couch.  She says its because I have restless leg syndrome and it keeps her up.  Also, she has started menapose and has hot flashes in the middle of the night.  She doesn't want to disturb my sleep (how thoughtful).

At least I get the bed :-)

we sleep in the same bed but not by my choice.  I moved all my 'things' out of the master bedroom and into the spare room a few months ago thinking I could at least make a space for myself and frankly sleeping next to him is too difficult to deal with.  Then my daughter got laid off and ended up moving back home...and yep...into the spare room.  so I'm stuck...

Yep, my wife and I sleep in the same bed. We've had the pillow defence, the 'bedcovers tucked under' barrier and the the elbows in the ribs offensive.  

Mainly because she did not like that I used to hold her close and that I sometimes groped her when we slept (LOL). After the fortifications were erected, she complained that I stopped holding her.

Nope. Haven't for several years and the thought of it now makes me really shudder. The "why" is pretty obvious. We aren't a real married couple. We don't like to hang out together, especially in bed.

My H says that he can't sleep when I'm not in the bed. Since he has done overnights (a lot) since we've been married, I find this hard to believe. He doesn't look sleep deprived

The reason that I stay in the master bedroom is simple. We have a king-size waterbed that I love. I've tried sleeping in the other 3 bedrooms, but I don't like the beds as well.

So, I just let him go to bed first, and then curl up on my side of the bed and listen to him snore.

No way she would never let me get that close. she has slept on the sofa for about 2 years. the last time she came into the bed about 12 mnths ago she woke up in the middle of the night to find my arm around her, she had a fit and promptly stormed off never to return. Sh does not allow me to see her undress or to touch her at all

No way she would never let me get that close. she has slept on the sofa for about 2 years. the last time she came into the bed about 12 mnths ago she woke up in the middle of the night to find my arm around her, she had a fit and promptly stormed off never to return. Sh does not allow me to see her undress or to touch her at all

No I moved out some months ago as it is less lonely sleeping alone.

Yes we sleep in the same bed, after 6 years you would think I would quit being hopeful more that sleep will happen. But I usually get up and pace the house for an hour or so after he has fallen asleep.

My lover (now partner & housemate!) slept with his wife right upto the night we moved in together. His reasons: there was only one usable bed in the house and the couch was too short for a decent night's sleep. There were no pillow or bedding barriers; after 20+ years he'd taught himself not to touch her. Of course, if he did accidently touch her, she'd forcibly remove his hand.

Now when we sleep together, he is curled up beside me or touching me all night long. I wish I could post my favorite picture of us: his head on my breast, both wearing pajamas and he's sound asleep!

It was hard for him to leave his wife. Other than sexlessness they had an okay marriage, well as ok as sexless marriages can be with what sexless means to a relationship. But he told me that sleeping cuddled together is why he did it.