Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Live With Unbearable Shame

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 52 People

    This Is Hard To Talk About But ... The Shame Is Killing Me

    I live in deep shame for my childhood and all the sexual abuse-I went thru in silence -  that went on, and not one soul cared about me! I feel such deep guilt for the most minor of things that others would not even worry about. I feel shame and guilt over the way I let my great...
    czaristacrystals czaristacrystals 36-40, F 8 Responses Apr 15, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    God Damn It.

    I'm beyond that sick, soothing emotional balm thinking about suicide can bring. I am starting to push beyond that into the realm of planning. My reasons aren't situational. I have the perfect life- I have a fiance who loves me, and I love him. He is my true love, my only...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 7 Responses May 11, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Everyone Say's It's Nothing, But I Don't Believe It

    I was born missing a finger on my right hand. It has made me quiet and withdrawn much of the time and I battle depression most of the time. Everybody says I make too much of it. But I can't let it go! And the doctor who delivered me cut a nerve in my face which makes me talk...
    LonelyGemini LonelyGemini 41-45 3 Responses Feb 20, 2010

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Shame At The Job

    I am a young woman from Latin America living and working in Sweden. Last Thursday I had a two days trip with my job, where all the people from different locations had a meeting and a Christmas party afterwards. We have drank a lot during the dinner and after eating I went to get...
    petala petala 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 19, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Don't Know Why...

    I don't know when it began, but I've always felt like the things I do are wrong.  Everything!  I feel...Dirty?  Stupid?  Disgusting?  Undeserving of all things good... I am ashamed of everything I do, I think, I feel, I am.
    moonlit1 moonlit1 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 28, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    At My Lifestyle...

    And also because of things that I have done wrong in my life. I know, I know, guilt is a wasted emotion but sometimes there are words I just want to say and I can't or I feel I can't and it burns a hole in my stomach and crushes me. I hate knowing that I wasn't there for someone...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F Jun 19, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I've Lived With...

    I grew up with an unbearable sense of shame about myself. More like gave birth to it, nurtured it, and let it become the suffocating monster that strangles me odd hours of the day. A simple walk to school is like the march of the dead. Imagine being 17 years old and having a...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 8 Responses Mar 30, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Time to Be Honest.

    I feel mentally ill. I'm thinking about cutting down on the time I spend here, it's making me more reserved an anti-social, not to mention it's also triggering stress and flash anger. I couldn't even sleep because of some ridiculous debate I had here last night. I don't even...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 1 Response May 15, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Impending Doom...

      I've carried shame my whole life. Shame that has fueled my addictions and exasperated them. My current addiction is sex and love and an uncontrollable obsession to seek exterior validation at mine and others emotional expense. It's tormenting all of the time, but the...
    ClawingMyWayOut ClawingMyWayOut 36-40 4 Responses Mar 31, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel
    kiddishguy kiddishguy 26-30, M 2 Responses Dec 22, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Related Experiences

    I love my parents, but I've wanted to move out for some time now. The only problem is I couldn't afford to get an apartment by myself, so I considered getting an apartment with one...
    AgentSean AgentSean 18-21, M Feb 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Not Much of a Life It's been about 10 years since i broke my first vertebrae my L-5 then i broke it 3 more times and blew up a disc they did a fusion L-4 to L-5 to S-1 but the...
    2cool4school 2cool4school 36-40 1 Response 3 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    So I ran away a couple of days ago, and they made me come back (they= police and family). They said they were gonna change and so far that's bullshit. I am leaving when I turn 17...
    nomnommings nomnommings 16-17, F Feb 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I just need to save a bit more money to move out, I'll still be in Chicago but about a good distance away. I'm thankful I have a place to live but ready to move on.
    roaminglostsoul roaminglostsoul 31-35, F Feb 24

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Yes, unfortunately so... We are roommates (it's not much different than our marriage) except I live upstairs. It's awkward I won't lie... Especially since I really wanna just be...
    OrchidsNuBlu OrchidsNuBlu 36-40, F 40 Responses 6 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Its been many, many years. He did some time, he still lives in my city. My kids don't have grandparents. He took that away. But I don't have any other family here other than my...
    Alone1980 Alone1980 31-35, F 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Well today is my bday. I thought maybe just maybe my husband would get up with the kids this morning, let me sleep in. I got everything ready lastnight so this morning would be a...
    mrspf mrspf 26-30, F 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    My husband is depressed and everything I say makes him feel bad. I can't talk to him about anything. I feel like I have to bottle everything up because he thinks anything bad is...
    SecretScorpio12 SecretScorpio12 22-25, F 1 Response 15 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Vizsla is what the breed is really called, but velcro is what they are known for. Seriously, if he could sew himself to me he probably would. He is never out of sight, ever. I...
    StephanieLynne1125 StephanieLynne1125 22-25, F Feb 6

    Your Response

    Cancel
    We are a group of 8 people that met trough a game, League Of Legends, or well, i met them all at seperate moments and put us all in a group, we were all so alike and had the very...
    Soldottern Soldottern 18-21, F Feb 10

    Your Response

    Cancel
    That's an understatement . If we look at the countries around the world where they don't sit down and watch the television at every waking moment,the population I would think is on...
    JohnCrighton JohnCrighton 51-55, M 2 Responses Feb 16

    Your Response

    Cancel
    You were my bestfriend since 2 years.I shared all my secret with you but from inside I loved a the most.After my brakeup I never looked for any guy but don't know why I fell for...
    tinadhar007 tinadhar007 26-30, F Feb 22

    Your Response

    Cancel
    My disabled husband is getting a power chair next week. We're trying to get a ramp built so he can go outside. My cousin was supposed to come over today and build it. Instead he...
    kmgg kmgg 31-35, F 2 Responses Feb 22

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have been dealing with anxiety for the last four years. I think that I always had it but I self medicated with weed and whiskey. Since I got sober four years ago, I have had to...
    OhShucksGoDucks OhShucksGoDucks 36-40, F a week ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have recently been diagnosed with BPD and ADHD. My whole life I feel like I've never fully fit in but thought it was normal insecurity. I married my husband 6 months ago after...
    mrspf mrspf 26-30, F 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    So for the last few months my husband has been severely depressed. I've been on his side before, but never let others know about it. Plus it was way before him and I met. Not that...
    SecretScorpio12 SecretScorpio12 22-25, F 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I'm 15 anyone wanna text me? just ask me for my number
    ashleysokolik ashleysokolik 13-15, F Feb 6

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Songs like this move me http://youtu.be/tLbya5qPveA
    Burrrr Burrrr 31-35, M Feb 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I am a mute. I am a good listener. I appreciate the written word. I appreciate the sound.
    Fondanastasia Fondanastasia 18-21, F 1 Response 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Is vulnerability weakness? I thought it was until I listened to Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. Brown challenges everything we think we know about vulnerability and based on...
    KemiKill KemiKill 36-40, F 5 Responses 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    How does your family deal with your relationship? I need advice on how to deal with my family. My mother, father, brother and sister all know about my relationship (we live...
    MerDerLoves MerDerLoves 22-25, F 1 Response Feb 20

    Your Response

    Cancel
    All my life I have been deeply fascinated with the other side of town, the darker aspects of reality. I could live any life I chose and take myself anywhere to which I please but...
    Svetyevokov101 Svetyevokov101 16-17, M 6 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Biggest problem with wanting to live somewhere new in the world is the choices you have. When your born you don't have a choice. Your family is yours the country and region you...
    Str8MaleCD Str8MaleCD 26-30, M 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I know, I know, great right? Yet another confused teenager thinking their over hormone driven feelings mean they are in love. Typical right? Let me tell you my story maybe you can...
    camomeal camomeal 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 5

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I am a 14 year old girl who doesn't get along with my mum. Me and my mum would get along maybe 10% of the time, the other 90% we fight or don't talk to each other. I really want...
    coolgirl2112 coolgirl2112 13-15, F 1 Response Feb 10

    Your Response

    Cancel
    My husband and I have been together for almost 8 years now. We have no kids together, and he has 1 son from a previous marriage. When I moved in to my husbands house (8 years ago...
    bbstorm bbstorm 26-30, F Feb 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    This is REALLY long, but I feel I have to share my experience. My fiance and I met when I was in 9th grade and he was in 10th grade. We went to the same high school and met through...
    NewMommy2015 NewMommy2015 18-21, F Feb 17

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Why can't I just live and not care what other people think of me. I feel judged when someone stares at me. They think I don't notice but I do. I've felt that vibe far to many...
    trulyspoken trulyspoken 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 12

    Your Response

    Cancel
    It is thought-provoking to me, to look back over my childhood and realize that all I ever wanted was to run away. Don't misunderstand; I did not have a bad childhood, as they go...
    disastercupcake disastercupcake 26-30, F 4 Responses Feb 12

    Your Response

    Cancel
    So many people struggle with their body image, I don't think many people can say they are truly happy with what they look like. I envy people who can. In an age were a lot of...
    Superficialsaint Superficialsaint 31-35, F 3 Responses Feb 15

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I hate Long Island. Everyone is happy being miserable and happy being stagnant, so, at 14, I moved to Columbus, OH to live with my dad, and I was happy, I never wanted to come back...
    mevsme22 mevsme22 22-25, F Feb 17

    Your Response

    Cancel
    When people meet gay members of my family and start to name all the gay people they like it makes us all giggle on the inside. Their discomfort is so obvious, but they are trying...
    dbarr1992 dbarr1992 22-25, F 3 Responses Feb 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I step out of the house and have this stuck on smile and a happy attitude. NoOne, but I, knows how fake it is. I tell everyone my husband and I always have a 3 day long anniversary...
    umd30 umd30 31-35, F 11 Responses