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I Live With Unbearable Shame

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 59 People

    This Is Hard To Talk About But ... The Shame Is Killing Me

    I live in deep shame for my childhood and all the sexual abuse-I went thru in silence -  that went on, and not one soul cared about me! I feel such deep guilt for the most minor of things that others would not even worry about. I feel shame and guilt over the way I let my great...
    czaristacrystals czaristacrystals 36-40, F 8 Responses Apr 15, 2011

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    I Don't Know Why...

    I don't know when it began, but I've always felt like the things I do are wrong.  Everything!  I feel...Dirty?  Stupid?  Disgusting?  Undeserving of all things good... I am ashamed of everything I do, I think, I feel, I am.
    moonlit1 moonlit1 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 28, 2009

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    God Damn It.

    I'm beyond that sick, soothing emotional balm thinking about suicide can bring. I am starting to push beyond that into the realm of planning. My reasons aren't situational. I have the perfect life- I have a fiance who loves me, and I love him. He is my true love, my only...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 7 Responses May 11, 2009

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    Impending Doom...

      I've carried shame my whole life. Shame that has fueled my addictions and exasperated them. My current addiction is sex and love and an uncontrollable obsession to seek exterior validation at mine and others emotional expense. It's tormenting all of the time, but the...
    ClawingMyWayOut ClawingMyWayOut 36-40 4 Responses Mar 31, 2009

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    At My Lifestyle...

    And also because of things that I have done wrong in my life. I know, I know, guilt is a wasted emotion but sometimes there are words I just want to say and I can't or I feel I can't and it burns a hole in my stomach and crushes me. I hate knowing that I wasn't there for someone...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F Jun 19, 2011

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    Everyone Say's It's Nothing, But I Don't Believe It

    I was born missing a finger on my right hand. It has made me quiet and withdrawn much of the time and I battle depression most of the time. Everybody says I make too much of it. But I can't let it go! And the doctor who delivered me cut a nerve in my face which makes me talk...
    LonelyGemini LonelyGemini 41-45 3 Responses Feb 20, 2010

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    I've Lived With...

    I grew up with an unbearable sense of shame about myself. More like gave birth to it, nurtured it, and let it become the suffocating monster that strangles me odd hours of the day. A simple walk to school is like the march of the dead. Imagine being 17 years old and having a...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 8 Responses Mar 30, 2009

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    Shame At The Job

    I am a young woman from Latin America living and working in Sweden. Last Thursday I had a two days trip with my job, where all the people from different locations had a meeting and a Christmas party afterwards. We have drank a lot during the dinner and after eating I went to get...
    petala petala 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 19, 2011

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    Time to Be Honest.

    I feel mentally ill. I'm thinking about cutting down on the time I spend here, it's making me more reserved an anti-social, not to mention it's also triggering stress and flash anger. I couldn't even sleep because of some ridiculous debate I had here last night. I don't even...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 1 Response May 15, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    My dad was In the military until I was 3, my parents separated when i was 4 and divorced when I was 5. Once the divorced happened I did live with my father but stayed in my room. I...
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    My wife has an online boyfriend and has kissed and been fondled by several other guys on nights out and I love it. I love to watch her in action, it's such a turn on
    Jgbb123 Jgbb123 46-50, M 1 Response 18 hrs ago

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    So I kind of haven't been on much since I broke my phone Sunday night- haven't been on anything really. I hope I get it fixed sometime in the next few days but until then there is...
    AshleyWCSloth AshleyWCSloth 16-17, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I'm the spouse with chronic pain. he has it too but not as severe as mine and our daughter does too. it's really hard and I feel useless. he doesn't make me feel that way. he's a...
    crazybipolarchick crazybipolarchick 36-40, F 1 day ago

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    I would like to start a sort of sex group for people that are In a relationship with someone that has disabilities that keeps them from having sex. So we the healthy sex starved...
    Lordfiercelove Lordfiercelove 31-35 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I have a dream of living in a house or an apartment with other people, who would actually care about each other. Everyone would have their private space, but whenever you come to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response 3 days ago

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    My story begins Mexico I was 7 when I saw him for the first time he was 11,I didn't talk to him much because I didn't know him but once I got comfortable with him we played and...
    alexism2415 alexism2415 18-21, F 4 days ago

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    If i gave you a loaded gun. Told you to point in at my heart. Told you to squeeze the trigger, would you? What if you couldn't be jailed for it. Would you then? I don't really...
    white701 white701 18-21, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    My ex boyfriend was a coke dealer but he'd never give me any for free lol
    charljones charljones 22-25, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    When I left home. I didn't care. I truest didn't. My parents could go **** them selves. But Ayer almost a year of traveling from shelters, to houses, to paying rent, even went...
    londonbr1dge londonbr1dge 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    I got sick, moved back in, recovered enough to try to go back out, got sicker, not leaving until I get betterer. lol
    Iwnt2shareu Iwnt2shareu 31-35, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    I feel suddenly sad now, my mother notified me while on our way to go out to eat in the car that she would be getting a house and moving away from my father. She gave me the...
    Cooper802 Cooper802 18-21, M 1 Response a week ago

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    I've had this same pain since I was only a few months old. Some days are worse than others. I've come to accept it mostly. I do have my days where I'm just so angry at having to...
    TrueBlueKid TrueBlueKid 13-15, F 1 Response a week ago

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    I moved out a month ago, after graduating from high school. Since that time my mom only called me once, to ask what the wifi password at home was. My parents seem to be very...
    dzbura dzbura 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 22

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    Almost 50, omg...she can be annoying, needy, she can't stand to be alone, and forces herself to be more like me....but NOT..., and the one good thing to come from this...
    mrsrshaw mrsrshaw 46-50, F Jul 22

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    I dont live with my dad ever since the world began. I need to text or call him whenever i want to see him. I'm just stealing his time not only his time but his wife and my half...
    hawkeye000027 hawkeye000027 22-25, M Jul 22

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    They try to take me every day. I don't know how I live with Them, I just try to stay away. They takes my family one by one but, They can never seem to grasp me. I want to live...
    oliviawalter007 oliviawalter007 16-17, F Jul 20

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    Latest Blog post I talk about Flying, Airports and the TSA and dealing with incontinence. I also go through my first experience and how you can make yours go smoothly. Ask me any...
    archerstaley archerstaley 26-30, M Jul 20

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    I used to. For everyone still going through it, my advice would be to get out of the situation and fast. Otherwise you may end up being accused of trying to murder them. With the...
    Nenmir Nenmir 22-25, F 4 Responses Jul 20

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    Courage to focus on the mountain above and not the fall below! :)
    cloudedsky cloudedsky 26-30 Jul 20

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    My "family" keep trash in the house, don't clean their dog's ****, let food go bad until it's filled with bugs and smells horrible, they store useless things for years that they...
    PureBlueLight PureBlueLight 26-30, M Jul 20

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    I have gotten very tired of sweeping and cleaning the room everyday after both my roommates. they go to the gym everyday then come back and track mud everywhere and hang there wet...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 20

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    I have gotten very tired of sweeping and cleaning the room everyday after both my roommates. they go to the gym everyday then come back and track mud everywhere and hang there wet...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 20

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    I live with a control freak. It causes an extreme amount of stress on my health and I'm sure it has taken years off my life. How do you handle? From everything, meals, watching tv...
    mom4ce mom4ce 51-55, F Jul 19

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    My brother, his long time girlfriend, and their baby are currently living with us. His girlfriend has been on methadone for years now, but it is starting to affect me. My sister...
    shebastar shebastar 16-17, F Jul 18

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    My life has been altered, or, as one woman I met told me, "transformed." I liked that word because something positive can be associated with it. It reminded me that even in the...
    christina1219 christina1219 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 18

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    Not sure what the world is coming to. I feel like a wild animal that's been raised in captivity and taught to perform circus tricks in exchange for food and shelter. I just want to...
    Wildernesslover1 Wildernesslover1 31-35, F Jul 17

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    Divorced a narcissist 10 years ago. Have a son who is now 18. Any contact with her has been filled with anger, accusations,condescension ... A true intent to spread her misery...
    YYCMan YYCMan 46-50, M 2 Responses Jul 17

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    You were a lie From hello to goodbye When I learned what you had been doing from the start It broke my heart Red flags and alarms When I'd run my fingers up and down your arms You...
    marisolmarisolmarisol marisolmarisolmarisol 31-35, F Jul 16

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    Vents: My mom... Where do I start with my mom. She is the most caring lovable person you will ever meet. The one that will get out of way to make you happy. The one that will cook...
    TonyThach TonyThach 18-21, M Jul 14

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    My mother an alcoholic for about 2 years now won't speak of her reasons for drowning herself in alcohol . Whatever they might be I might not understand but it would certainly make...
    undeniablyflawed undeniablyflawed 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 14

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    I was able to get Marc from wearing-adult-diapers.com and Brittany from the Back in Diapers youtube channel. Both of them were great and you can check out their sites and blogs via...
    archerstaley archerstaley 26-30, M Jul 14

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    When we moved into the room we are in now, my boyfriend and I knew this was going to be a temporary situation. We had a rental unit that we were supposed to go half on with my mom...
    RebekahWriter13 RebekahWriter13 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 13