Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Live With Unbearable Shame

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 60 People

    Everyone Say's It's Nothing, But I Don't Believe It

    I was born missing a finger on my right hand. It has made me quiet and withdrawn much of the time and I battle depression most of the time. Everybody says I make too much of it. But I can't let it go! And the doctor who delivered me cut a nerve in my face which makes me talk...
    LonelyGemini LonelyGemini 41-45 3 Responses Feb 20, 2010

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Don't Know Why...

    I don't know when it began, but I've always felt like the things I do are wrong.  Everything!  I feel...Dirty?  Stupid?  Disgusting?  Undeserving of all things good... I am ashamed of everything I do, I think, I feel, I am.
    moonlit1 moonlit1 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 28, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    At My Lifestyle...

    And also because of things that I have done wrong in my life. I know, I know, guilt is a wasted emotion but sometimes there are words I just want to say and I can't or I feel I can't and it burns a hole in my stomach and crushes me. I hate knowing that I wasn't there for someone...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F Jun 19, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    This Is Hard To Talk About But ... The Shame Is Killing Me

    I live in deep shame for my childhood and all the sexual abuse-I went thru in silence -  that went on, and not one soul cared about me! I feel such deep guilt for the most minor of things that others would not even worry about. I feel shame and guilt over the way I let my great...
    czaristacrystals czaristacrystals 36-40, F 9 Responses Apr 15, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I've Lived With...

    I grew up with an unbearable sense of shame about myself. More like gave birth to it, nurtured it, and let it become the suffocating monster that strangles me odd hours of the day. A simple walk to school is like the march of the dead. Imagine being 17 years old and having a...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 8 Responses Mar 30, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Shame At The Job

    I am a young woman from Latin America living and working in Sweden. Last Thursday I had a two days trip with my job, where all the people from different locations had a meeting and a Christmas party afterwards. We have drank a lot during the dinner and after eating I went to get...
    petala petala 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 19, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Impending Doom...

      I've carried shame my whole life. Shame that has fueled my addictions and exasperated them. My current addiction is sex and love and an uncontrollable obsession to seek exterior validation at mine and others emotional expense. It's tormenting all of the time, but the...
    ClawingMyWayOut ClawingMyWayOut 36-40 4 Responses Mar 31, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    God Damn It.

    I'm beyond that sick, soothing emotional balm thinking about suicide can bring. I am starting to push beyond that into the realm of planning. My reasons aren't situational. I have the perfect life- I have a fiance who loves me, and I love him. He is my true love, my only...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 7 Responses May 11, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Time to Be Honest.

    I feel mentally ill. I'm thinking about cutting down on the time I spend here, it's making me more reserved an anti-social, not to mention it's also triggering stress and flash anger. I couldn't even sleep because of some ridiculous debate I had here last night. I don't even...
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 1 Response May 15, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Related Experiences

    I used to live with my mom and dad but my dad was sent back to Mexico (for certain reasons), and then my grandma got very sick a few months back so my mom went charging back to...
    mmanuel69 mmanuel69 16-17, M 1 Response 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Im 26 and i still live with my parents. They still think they have control over me by not letting me see my friends and not letting me go anywhere. They don't treat me like an...
    redphoenix02 redphoenix02 22-25, F 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have learned to live with my incontinence and have just got used to wearing a nappy all the time. For me accepting and embracing the problem was the way forward. I wet my bed...
    Stillwetshisbed Stillwetshisbed 46-50, M 2 Responses May 9

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Specifically, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Spectrum Disorder; I live with bipolar type two and a borderline personality disorder (BPD.) I first exhibited symptoms in 2002 and...
    grindhound grindhound 22-25, T May 12

    Your Response

    Cancel
    edguy save me pearl jam alive metallica nothing else matters staind so far away verve lucky man manic street preachers design for life puddle of mudd blurry micheal boulton how i...
    cmbryan316 cmbryan316 26-30, M 2 Responses May 14

    Your Response

    Cancel
    any linkin park song cant live without linkin park
    flamenskall flamenskall 18-21, M May 14

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Here's the 2nd song in my list of my 10 Songs I Can't Live Without. Dare to sit still while this is playing. Go on. I dare ya to try. Get Up Offa That Thing
    RobertaS RobertaS 36-40, F May 19

    Your Response

    Cancel
    This is the first time I've ever seen anything like this. If someone told me a few weeks ago I'd need to find support, education, and people in a similar situation to mine for...
    EmmaGuerra EmmaGuerra 22-25, F May 20

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I live with a family member. I recently told her I was moving in June. She asked me for rent in May knowing that I told her I am moving in June. There is also a family member...
    LadyHeyward LadyHeyward 41-45, F May 21

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I've always ended back with my parents for what ever the reason , my brother and sister hit the ground running although my brother lives not far , my sister has moved all over the...
    Prettibrowngirl Prettibrowngirl 70+, F 1 Response 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Few years ago my life were taken from me by a Mafia Ring. Once they found me again, trying to live about 3 years ago; they started to STALK me. On line Off Line. I have been living...
    kslilacs kslilacs 31-35, F May 21

    Your Response

    Cancel
    My mother is a hoarder we live is a 3 bedroom house with my room being the only room with a bed you can really sleep in. Everything around me is filled up with useless items...
    ksmith94 ksmith94 18-21 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I moved in with my boyfriend 2 years ago and right when we moved in I found out I was pregnant. I've been with him for 5 years and now that we live together have our daughter I...
    lailabunni lailabunni 18-21, F 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I actually thank God I've become an aggressive b***ch. The hoarding has made me so miserable that I have basically just started to go through the house like the white tornado...
    24toes 24toes 51-55, F 1 Response Apr 30

    Your Response

    Cancel
    after 18 years, I was told by a guidance counselor that I am autistic, now I am left to cope with it alone...
    omss omss 18-21, M May 3

    Your Response

    Cancel
    After a day in the ER. I lay in bed with 10 million thoughts running through my head. How can I be mad or frustrated and show my emotions when I know it will only hurt his feelings...
    lovewillkeepus2gether lovewillkeepus2gether 36-40, F 3 Responses May 6

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I love my wife. I must or how could I stay with her during her twelve years of illness and virtually no sex during that time. We no longer hike, bike or swim together. There are...
    greyballs greyballs 56-60, M 1 Response May 9

    Your Response

    Cancel
    This is my life. He just got a new job and found out today that he had lied about calling his old boss and talking to him about quitting. Before yesterday he lied about using his...
    armstrong7984 armstrong7984 31-35, F 1 Response May 9

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I'm 24 years old now, and I'm making steps to separate from my parents. Don't get me wrong, I love them very much, no unit of measure can fathom my love for them. I love them to...
    Sylphhound Sylphhound 22-25, M May 11

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Joan Jett & The Blackhearts I Hate Myself For Loving You Aerosmith Dream On Guns N Roses Sweet Child Of Mine Queen Dragon Attack Otis Redding Sitting On Dock Of Bay...
    ForbiddenFruitLove95 ForbiddenFruitLove95 18-21, F 3 Responses May 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    1) Kansas city- The New basement Tapes 2) Ghost- Halsey 3) Young folks- Peter Bjorn and John 4) Melrose Diner- The Wonder Years 5) Cute Without the 'E' (Cut from the team...
    aclockworkmegan aclockworkmegan 13-15, F May 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    1. Who You Are - Jessie J 2. Titanium - David Guetta 3. Chandelier - Sia 4. Nobody's Perfect - Jessie J 5. Thousand Years - Christina Perri 6. Lose Yourself - Eminem 7. King For A...
    pyrodexx46 pyrodexx46 16-17, F May 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    That's what i'm going to call it. It's hard living with someone who has problems comprehending certain things, and sometimes i forget it's out of their control and i become...
    SaintInHell SaintInHell 18-21, F May 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I need a phone with 500% battery
    RebeccaMontero RebeccaMontero 22-25, F 2 Responses May 15

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Can't make it without this dude right here; he's my best friend, my counselor when I get crazy & my bro from another mo haha
    TyranFarted TyranFarted 18-21, M 1 Response May 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Music is the blood that pumps through my veins that keeps me alive. Without it, I may as well die. It is the one thing that keeps me calm when all is wrong. It is the one thing...
    Majesticscribbler Majesticscribbler 16-17, F 1 Response May 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I just want to say thank you for everyone who is posting their experiences on this website. Until today I thought I was alone. My husband who is a truck driver has gone through a...
    klchipman klchipman 51-55, F 6 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I've been living as an incontinent person for 8 years. I'm used to wearing diapers and dealing with all the extra cost and work it involves. I prefer cloth diapers. I finally had...
    westway westway 61-65, M 1 Response 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have been together with my partner now for 18months. She unfortunately is a widow. Her husband died tragically 4 years ago. I know of her past before we got together and she was...
    Lostman84 Lostman84 31-35, M 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have always wanted to be an amputee ever since I was a little girl. We all have dreams for when we grow up but my dream was a little different than everyone else's. I was to...
    Stumplover123 Stumplover123 36-40 Apr 30

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Yes, imagining my life becoming ten times better is what keeps me alive. When I do not, I become sucked into the black hole. Imagine, by John Lennon.
    Keystomyheart Keystomyheart 31-35, F 1 Response May 4

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Keystomyheart Keystomyheart 31-35, F 4 Responses May 4

    Your Response

    Cancel
    my imagination usually keeps me out of trouble. I sit there and imagine punching people in the throat so I don't actually do it.
    CallmeHopelessNotRomantic CallmeHopelessNotRomantic 36-40, F May 5

    Your Response

    Cancel