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I Locked My Real Self Away For 9 Years

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support

    Leaving

    I'm leaving this group tootles
    Missing22Aquarius Missing22Aquarius 18-21, F Oct 10, 2013

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    Lost And Found?

    When I was younger I decided that after My parents got divorced I wouldn't survive. I had wanted to die for years, when I was just four I wanted to just die, and I prayed for it all the time. I had an amazing memory, but punched holes in memories I didn't like or thought were...
    Missing22Aquarius Missing22Aquarius 18-21, F Mar 24, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    [long story ahead because I need to get this off my chest] I have been struggling with solipsism my entire life. The people around me and my environment feels as though they are a...
    theflamechronicles theflamechronicles 18-21, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    If you really think about it -legitimately sit and think about it- the idea that this unconquered misery of yours is born of deficient chemicals is quite ridiculous- and...
    LittleWhiteRoom LittleWhiteRoom 18-21, F 1 day ago

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    I am a 26 year old lady, currently in a relationship with a 41 year old divorcee. We have been dating for the past 6 years and I love this man with all I’ve got, he has been...
    namein namein 26-30, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    my plan is to become more modest. more cultural. stress free. I want to find my inner self and spend more time sorting my life out and planning for the future. I'm going to look...
    candlejack21 candlejack21 13-15, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I was twelve years old when I took a razor to my wrist for the first time. That is the moment in my life I wish I could change because little did I know that one simple act could...
    kait52 kait52 18-21, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    So I'm not trying to write a sob story, I guess I'm just looking for some kind of motivation or support or even coping strategies that may have worked for some people. So this is...
    HippieRose HippieRose 22-25, F 5 days ago

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    It happened again only this time I bruised myself. I felt like cutting but the people around me notice more and get upset. I don't want to do this anymore but I don't know how to...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    G'day guys! My name is Aaron.. im 20 years old... i live in Australia.. and im really looking for a friend... that i can skype with ... and talk to ... and have understand me...
    walax229 walax229 18-21, M 2 Responses Jun 25

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    I am a 14 year old boy living in Tennessee, I have been a very quiet, shy, and emotional person, these past few years I would stay locked in my room and never come out unless it...
    santana772 santana772 13-15, M 1 Response Jun 24

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    This guy I've liked for over a year, apparently has liked me back for the same amount of time. Let's just call him Bob for anonymous sakes. I genuinely like and care about...
    mollzjanine mollzjanine 18-21 1 Response Jun 24

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    I love the feeling of having the ball gag in my mouth and forcing me to keep my jaw open it is so painful and I'm drooling so bad but I just can't take it off
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jun 23

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    I'm so so so sad :( I want to cry until I throw up or cry my sadness away :(
    wonderfulIam wonderfulIam 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 23

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    I'm not fake, I'm a real albino, and 22 years old. So stop reporting me has fake. Get a life
    PedroMiguel583 PedroMiguel583 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 23

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    today I don't know why I'm even here... I am so utterly depressed that I cannot comprehend any emotion besides being sad... I try to be nice to others and I get snapped at- I try...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jun 22

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    hello Darkness, we meet again :( so sad.. as always.. :(
    wonderfulIam wonderfulIam 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 22

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    hey guy I'm new to this app but I need out of my house. I'm so tired of my step dad and mom fighting and blaming every thing on me and I already had to beat up my step dad when he...
    KingofSwing69 KingofSwing69 13-15, M 1 Response Jun 22

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    To the man I've loved like no one else I remember the day I first saw you, We were sophomores back then, I was sitting near the window staring at the door waiting for my friends...
    officialwanderer officialwanderer 18-21, F Jun 22

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    I thought I was the only one who did this. I actually hired a maid for years to do little more than wash, fold and put my clothes away. I have no problem washing them.
    MikeL2017 MikeL2017 46-50 1 Response Jun 21

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    I should change the title of this story to "I Used to Strive for Spiritual Enlightenment, but now I Don't" Did I find it? Did I get it? I don't think so, but what did happen is...
    ILAMA2 ILAMA2 41-45, F 2 Responses Jun 21

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    High school was a terrible part of my life, and I consider this the point where depression started to affect me. Throughout middle school, I had a couple of friends I could be...
    erinw96 erinw96 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 20

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    I became depressed in the 6th grade. That was the year that I was sexually assaulted by a few students on my bus. They threatened to beat me if I ever told anyone about it, so I...
    neutralbeanie neutralbeanie 13-15, T 1 Response Jun 19

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    I've locked myself up in this ball gag! My how isn't to sore but the drool is bad at time! It's tight but I'm enjoying it! I'm going to stay gagged all weekend
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jun 19

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    I've suffered depression for many years indeed. For the longest time I would just bottle every screwed up thought that I had. In high school I turned to creative writing doing...
    mattywheels25 mattywheels25 26-30, M 2 Responses Jun 19

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    I used to go on and off with anxiety and then depression. However I never had any suicidal thoughts because I have a slight bit of arrogance thinking that I am very needed. People...
    ValhallaAwaits ValhallaAwaits 22-25, M Jun 19

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    Found this site randomly while browsing the internet in a depressed bout. Not sure what I'm expecting, I've sort of given up on the belief that human decency is even a real thing...
    Whitespark Whitespark 22-25, M Jun 19

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    Hi there I'm crying. My name is Andrea and I´m a sunshine, funny girl at college and sweetest kid at home but most of all I´m depressed. I feel alone at all times and can´t find...
    andre41697 andre41697 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 18

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    [Trigger Warning] It's kind of sad. I can't stop even though I want to. When I feel really sad or angry I hurt myself and it makes me feel better. I was only 11 the first time I...
    ThatOneUsername ThatOneUsername 18-21, T Jun 18

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    Today I went to turn in the final documents for a place to live. It didn't end well. Still homeless still depressed still angry. A friend asked if he could leave his weapon in my...
    BrokenWingedAngel BrokenWingedAngel 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 18

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    I haven't self harmed for year and half now. I stopped after I cut a 30 cm long, 1 cm wide and deep wound across my right thigh, with scissors. I bled so much and I can still feel...
    lenna99 lenna99 16-17, F Jun 18

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    I can't deal with society and day-today life any more. Going outside and facing the the negative judgement of others is too much to bear. I want to go completely off the grid. I'm...
    Parvus Parvus 41-45, M 1 Response Jun 18

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    More damage from meds than bullies. The wealthy committed a crime. And wont be punished. They paid to relabel seroquel. The new classification is legal. And the lawsuit...
    Converted Converted 46-50, M Jun 18

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    This condition runs in my family, and I was diagnosed when I was in 7th grade..
    SentimentalMood SentimentalMood 36-40, F 4 Responses Jun 18

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    I first started showing signs of major depressive disorder at age 9 and was officially diagnosed at age 14 in a psychiatric institution.
    leggyshay leggyshay 16-17, F Jun 18

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    So why tell a sad person to choose that. If they want to be gone why say okay. Why say they have to choose. Lately on ep i fight both. Staying And going. One member...
    Converted Converted 46-50, M Jun 18

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    Depression is like trekking through a thick, humid jungle. You're hacking away at vines and bushes that crowd your path, but only to find yourself halted at a river of quicksand...
    littlelostfox littlelostfox 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 18

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    So im really trying to stay positive and keep a positive mentality nowadays.. Part of the being so is embracing my self to actually start loving myself more and accepting how i...
    Sublevarse Sublevarse 18-21, M 1 Response Jun 18

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    Picture a long, deep, and dark tunnel. In this tunnel is nothing but absolute silence and stillness. Absolute darkness. At the end of the tunnel is a blinding, bright light that...
    littlelostfox littlelostfox 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 18

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    ok lets be real, everyone looking at this has a desire to run away for whatever reason, well so do I so I'm gonna get together a group of people to run away with me just send me a...
    dlusk12321 dlusk12321 16-17, M 1 Response Jun 17

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    my name is Dustin and I've been seriously thinking about running away for years now, I'm 17 and can't take this no more, if there's any one out there that's just sick and tired of...
    dlusk12321 dlusk12321 16-17, M 1 Response Jun 16

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