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I Lost My Partner to Suicide

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 21 People

    Is suicide genetic? My father committed suicide

    almost 3 years ago (I was 16) and ever since the age of 14 I've been battling with depression and all these overwhelming feelings of sadness, hatred, and guilt. I envy my father so much. For what he did. For what I'm not brave enough to do. But I'm just so tired of life.... Wish...
    Aquarius05 Aquarius05
    18-21, F
    8 Responses Nov 13, 2014

    I can't stop thinking about you.

    I still can't believe it hasn't even been three months but it already feels like a life time ago.
    katerbug7 katerbug7
    18-21, F
    Dec 19, 2013

    The Thing That Gets Me

    As the grieving time goes on, people ask me why I have no anger. I have none, and I carry none in my heart. They don’t seem to understand that sharing your life with a broken person means that you deal with the anger when they live. When suicide came up, as a topic or a...
    AwakeWithMe AwakeWithMe
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Oct 11, 2007

    I Think He Knew, Even Then.

    Miss him. The way he looked at me, the last time, I think he knew. As I stood on the stairs, in his eyes, so blue, so alone, He knew. And I think somewhere deep down I knew too. I miss so much, the winter picture, the mornings. The smell of his skin, his voice, all that...
    AwakeWithMe AwakeWithMe
    26-30, F
    Dec 3, 2007

    Precious Bones...Radiantly Beautiful.

    A boy. God was he beautiful. I just had to lose another one. That man had my heart. I never thought that I would lose him. I just could've sworn he was going to be one of those souls that was going to stay with me forever. But how I could I be so stupid? I should've known. The...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Mar 30, 2013

    I lost my late fiancé to this awful disease.

    It's so hard to cope with losses to this violent type of death. Whether it be a partner, family member or friend it's never easy.
    suzannenderekh suzannenderekh
    26-30, F
    Mar 10, 2015

    Just a Little

      Numb. I think that’s the best I can do right now. But it somehow doesn’t capture it. I mean there is so much going on, the practical pieces are annoying and bothersome. But overall, I guess I feel like I can’t connect to that part of me. The objective...
    AwakeWithMe AwakeWithMe
    26-30, F
    Jun 7, 2008


    Single file, step by step, circling around, walking a pattern. Standing still, watching. I can’t see you, and I wait. I don’t know what for, but I wait. Holding my breath, holding my tongue, wanting to see, yet unable. Do I not believe enough? What do I believe. I can...
    AwakeWithMe AwakeWithMe
    26-30, F
    Oct 14, 2007

    Lost Everything

    He was seventeen. I was sixteen. We were all kids. We were all bad. Everyone loved him because he was so pure, so honest, so kind and beautiful. Now his mother says that he was to good for this world. But I think the angel of God was mistaken when he took my friend that day. It...
    Angryletter Angryletter
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 2, 2012
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