I Lost Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 137 People

    Its been 9 months and 4 days

    since my dad passed away. Its been 9 months and 4 days since I knew who I was. I havent looked in the mirror and stopped recognizing who I was. I have looked inside to my deepest self and realized I have shattered. I was too afraid to admit it then and too afraid to admit it now...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Dec 4, 2015

    No Easy Way Out

    I am sat here up at an ungodly time of nite alone,unable to sleep..A mind full of thought and a heart full of pain,hurt and dread.....My partner of 8 years sleeps in the room next too me but his presence is not felt..I try to push aside the envatible but the pain is unbearable...
    kindredspiritalways kindredspiritalways
    26-30, F
    1 Response Sep 2, 2012

    I thought I knew who I was,

    energetic, athletic, whimsical, and just enjoyable. That's what I was all about that 3 months ago. Then bam. Depression came. I'm none of those, I'm antisocial, I barely utter a word or Show emotion everyday. Nothing makes me laugh or happy. I feel so NUMB.
    hopecatcher hopecatcher
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Apr 15, 2014

    I Have To Get This Out...

    How long have I been kidding myself? What a tangled web I've weaved myself into. I woke her up to drive me to school just as I have every Tuesday morning since the fifth of January. She cusses me, yells at me, the yanks the covers off her in a fury, gets up and comes after me...
    charlottes1web charlottes1web
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Mar 13, 2012

    I Found Me

    My 39th year and I am now, just finding me. I would not describe this time in my life as a mid-life crisis, but I am definitely experiencing mid-life awareness. I keep reminding myself that I am younger today than I ever will be again in my life. I turn 40 next summer. Over...
    Hollipop Hollipop
    36-40
    Oct 24, 2012
    wearefools wearefools
    18-21, M
    Apr 24, 2014

    I Lost Everything...but Am Trying To Rebuild Myself.

    I am twenty four and at times I still feel lost. I have dealt with years of severe depression stemming from the death of my father over eight years ago. My life had a plan but after his death my world fell apart and I was never the same again. I attended a great high-school and I...
    medt medt
    22-25
    2 Responses Dec 26, 2010

    I Wanted To Be Better

    I recently forgot who I was, completely lost myself in what I thought was the right thing to do. I was so scared of hurting people, and I was so desperate for love, I stopped being who I am. I tried to be what I felt was right, I tried to change in ways that would help people. In...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    3 Responses Aug 15, 2012

    The Total Opposite

    I had everything in life. More than actually what one needs. Great loving family, Loads of friends, the school and course i wanted. I played sports. I was in dance. I sing. I love animals. I paint. I enjoyed every single bit in life. And just before all this was taken away from...
    Maya08 Maya08
    18-21
    Jan 6, 2013

    Lost The Best

    I know, I'm not a normal girl. My best friend is a 6' 5" guy, named Ben. Seems normal..but he hasn't talked to me in 2 weeks.. He's everything to me.. Heres how I lost him.. He's always been so close to me.. We would talk everyday, and we'd share secrets, and he knew...
    Djarrett117 Djarrett117
    16-17, F
    Jul 31, 2012

    when i was 15, i started to really like girls.

    of all sorts. but i had a peculiarity: i liked depression. i was only mildly depressed, but i would seek out the depressed ones and do what i could. this leads to the second thing: it was all online, and i cheated. a lot. as in 20 girls who would exchange words of love and...
    Josephdalepi Josephdalepi
    18-21, M
    1 Response Mar 10, 2014

    The Fall Of Pride

    Ok, so I did it. I signed up on one of these forums and am going to post a personal story. I never thought Id be the one to do it but I guess that is one small joy of life. The inevitability of seemingly random spontaneity . If you read this whole story, thank you in advance...
    JohnRain1988 JohnRain1988
    26-30, M
    1 Response Sep 24, 2013

    Lately, I feel like I'm drowning.

    There isn't really a lot going on, it's just my inner demons trying to drag me into the darkness. I know I need help. I'm on meds, tried counselling.. this is something I need to face head on. I know all of the truths of my life, but these demons keep sowing negativity in all of...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses Mar 30, 2014

    Where did she go? There

    once was a beautiful flower Blossomed so bright and vibrant Her fragrance filled the rooms of a tower, Nothing could stop her sprout She grew so tall, so proud Her leaves and petals were at it's finest until anunstoppable darkness grew so loud Her vibrancy hid from it...
    hopecatcher hopecatcher
    18-21, F
    May 7, 2014

    Why are there so many weird people on here,

    im itSaying in great because I'm far from it but what's with the peopleSending weird ****? A while ago a guy asked me if I want to be his doggy, like what the hell people. This website if for people sharing things like what they are going through like hard times(like me) and...
    hopecatcher hopecatcher
    18-21, F
    May 27, 2014

    At 19 I decided that I was ready to fall in

    love. I met a boy through mutual friends, we talked all night, and I knew he was the one I would open my heart to. Our relationship started off amazingly well. I remember feeling so ecstatic; the sky seemed bluer, the birds seemed to be singing my name, everything seemed okay...
    Halfapersonn Halfapersonn
    22-25, F
    1 Response Feb 12

    I am passing out of high school this year.

    I'll be in college soon. I'm sure my grades won't be that great for I'm not the same me now. Since my very childhood I have been very responsible to my duties. My father is going through a mental disease, schizophrenia. My mother got to really know about it after their marriage...
    25mayni97 25mayni97
    18-21, F
    1 Response Mar 10, 2015

    I've broken down but I'm back.

    I haven't been on EP for a few months. I had a metal collapse and have only recently stopped retreating from everyone. I've missed this community. Reading your stories makes me feel strong and supported. To my friends who message me, I've missed you and cannot wait to catch up...
    tulsateacher tulsateacher
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Jul 13, 2014

    How I Lost Myself

    Everyone saw me as a good girl. I hated it! I should do no wrong, nor could I. I feel like if I made a mistake then I am a bad person. You have to be the role model and you have to do what is right even if you dont like it. I saw my self like that all the time. I could not...
    lostthoughts lostthoughts
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Dec 14, 2010

    Too May Emotions

              I think maybe it's because I'm extremely bipolar that when my mood changes are so fast I get confused..  I mean it's like "Oh, I'm happy." Then like ten seconds later "God you ******* **** I hope you choke on a ****!" I'm mean, then I'm nice. I'm not stable...
    TheRogueWolf TheRogueWolf
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Apr 27, 2012

    The Not Me

    But damnit, I'm trying to find me again.Back there in the depths of my eating disorder and the pit of my depression...  I don't have any clue who I was. I kept some journal entries and poems during that time.  When I go back and read them, my throat starts to close up and my...
    fadingvioletdawn fadingvioletdawn
    18-21, F
    May 9, 2012

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    EVER REMEMBER THIS - - > JESUS LOVES YOU.
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    Just a fantasy... (based on this ideal person... Fictitious of course) (Kind of bored, so I felt like posting it here too..) Us It's so dark in my room Like the kind of...
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