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I Lost Someone To Suicide

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 8,240 People

    I was 18 and quit tech school

    and my job to run away with my friends in my car to a month long festival in the Ocala forest. I met a guy my first night there he was mixed with bright blue eyes. We kept locking eyes, he played the guitar and had a dog that he loved the whole festival. His eyes pulled me in...
    Worleybirdie Worleybirdie 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 12

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    How Suicide Has Effected My Life..

    I am writing this story after reading other peoples horrifying experiences with suicide.  Mine seems mild compared to some of the stories i have read on here. My experiences with suicide started with my Uncle Paul.  He shot himself when i was a toddler so i dont...
    kim8701 kim8701 18-21 16 Responses Jul 15, 2008

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    Well , November 6th, 2014 ,

    my boyfriend at the age of 20 took his life. I feel so responsible . We were already not on good terms and we talked it out prior to that moment , but then I became enraged with his actions shortly after our talk which put us on irregular terms once again. As we traveled by car...
    KiNieeBee KiNieeBee 22-25, F 7 Responses 3 days ago

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    My name is jessica I'm 27 I lost my mom to

    suicide may17 th 2009 I'm starting a support group for families left behind after a suicide it called Julie's hope. I'm looking for other people that would under stand what I'm going through and to join me at my meetings I live in Garfield heights ohio message me or call me at...
    lifeafterasuicide lifeafterasuicide 26-30, F 7 Responses Aug 27, 2014

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    hello 9 years ago i lost my stepfather to

    suicide, he burned himself in his car to death and i still don't know the whole true. he was my stepfather only in name he was more like a friend because we were close in age (he was 7 years older) i got along got with him and we would often talk or cuddle. most time we spoke...
    sundina sundina 22-25, F Jul 10

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    Two People

    I was one of the first people to discover Alice dead. She had been growing quite distant for some time and one day she said to come to her house to talk with her a little. I was overjoyed! She's reaching out! I quickly put on some good clothes and walked to her place. The door...
    EmpowermentProject EmpowermentProject 31-35, F 8 Responses Jun 5, 2013

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    I Didn't Think I Would Actually Share This Here

    I really try to not dwell in the past, but someone asked a question this week that reminded me of the unique circumstances around surviving the suicide of someone you love.   My husband took his own life four years ago.  It was not his first attempt, although I had...
    edgargeorge edgargeorge 41-45, F 32 Responses Jul 31, 2009

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    "It's not like you to leave the stage in the

    middle of a song. Your absolutely beautiful song" the lyrics got me in the feels. "Why" by Rascal Flatts https://youtu.be/j3_85GXsKqk
    iusedtolovemyself iusedtolovemyself 46-50, F 4 Responses Jun 15

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    I'm scared a family member is suicidal,

    and there isn't anything I can do about it. I don't know how to deal with the possibility. I can't help. Legal issues. I can't stop the law. But I can't lose them. I've already lost one family member to suicide, this will destroy the family, and me.
    TechieGeek TechieGeek 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 3

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    Saying Goodbye To Luke

    I cannot believe it has been almost two years since we lost you. My emotions at times can feel just as raw as the day you left. But then there are days where you don’t cross my mind, almost like it was a nightmare, long forgotten, lost in a childhood full of dreams.Saying...
    girlbythebay girlbythebay 22-25, F 9 Responses Nov 7, 2011

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    I was married to one of the most beautiful

    women on the planet. She was a nurse for over 15 years. One of the most caring loving and by far to this date the sexiest woman I have ever known. She was absolutely the women of my dreams. We were the couple that you saw that always held hands kissed and you could tell we were...
    Curtazman Curtazman 46-50, M 5 Responses Jul 2

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    Hello everyone I gather you here today to tell

    you that my little brother has committed suicide I miss him so much he shot himself with a gun he was just laying there so lifeless why did he do it. Why. I didn't even know he was going through a lot my little bubby has just killed himself I saw the note and he gave this...
    kRaZeDmODDeR kRaZeDmODDeR 13-15, M 10 Responses Jul 7

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    My sister took her life 5 mos ago.

    I still have to walk myself through this new reality forgetting or finding it impossible to believe that this actually happened. Life is tricky and unpredictable right now. Feel wildly insecure and unbalanced. I'm finding it nearly impossible to do anything I used to find fun. I...
    missdioggi missdioggi 36-40, F 17 Responses Jan 9

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    I Lost My Dad To Suicide.....Paul Anthony.

    ([Edit] Just noticed over 2000 people have read this. I hope some of you found a tiny bit of something to relate to. and thank you all so much for taking the time to read this ) I found this thread so am taking a few moments to just put my experience out there. Feel kinda kooky...
    CharlieUniform CharlieUniform 31-35, F 74 Responses Apr 24, 2011

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    This story is going to be written

    as if I was talking to her, because its one of the only ways I know how to get it out. Please bare with me, this is a hard story to write, but it has be written.... We told each other we would always be there for each other, and I was always there for you, even if it was at 2am...
    BroknGirl89 BroknGirl89 26-30, F 5 Responses Jul 3

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    I've never really posted anything about him

    before. You'd have thought I would, considering I've been so open with everything else. But I had a conversation with someone else, who made me realise that it is real, and pretending like it isn't simply will not make it go away. He killed himself, that's it. One of my best...
    betruetoyourself14 betruetoyourself14 13-15, F 4 Responses Feb 16

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    Hi. I am new to this,

    I have just posted about my normal home life & what I have been through with 5 babies under the age of 5, but I would love to tell you a story that happen just after my twins were born. I had been friends with this girl called Grace, I met her on a opening day at college a few...
    Florence1994 Florence1994 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 19

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    We weren't close. She had her friends.

    I had my notebook. She was a beautiful dancer. I was a social outcast. She was always smiling. I was always looking at the ground. Her laugh was contagious. My colds were contagious. Her favorite color was pink. My favorite color was black. She was at war with her demons, I...
    mymartianromance mymartianromance 16-17, F Jun 17

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    It was January 23, 2015,

    just a few months ago. I woke up in the morning and the atmosphere felt different, almost as if I was in another country. The sky was eerily dark and I just felt a knot in my stomach. My mother hadn't woke my sister and I up for school so we were confused, but didn't ponder upon...
    Eneal1202 Eneal1202 16-17, M 6 Responses Jun 22

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    I don't really talk about him.

    Not because I'm mad or sad, I've been both of those things, but that's not why. He was my best friend in high school. The first two years of it anyway. We were both misfits, outcasts. He was the fat kid and I was the weird girl. Except he didn't see me like that. To him, I was...
    kbetweens kbetweens 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 27, 2014

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    My World Lost A Beautiful But Tragic Woman.

    My mother was a stunning woman. She was of irish, french and tahitian heritage. The clearest blue eyes, dark curly long mane for hair, a models body with the height to match. Apple of her fathers eye, eldest of three, spoiled by the love of a family. She had everything. She had...
    DarkHeartLove DarkHeartLove 26-30, F 6 Responses Jul 10, 2012

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    June 29th is always an emotional surprise.

    It was around 1pm and we were instant messaging on Facebook. Joking around as usual. We had no idea she was planning to do this for years. She said someone was at the door and she'd be right back. I didn't know she was already gone. The phone rang. My mother in law was crying...
    iusedtolovemyself iusedtolovemyself 46-50, F 8 Responses Jun 24

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    I lost the best mate I ever had,

    I didn't know him for long, he was my flat mate in a western suburbs halfway house I lived in after I got kicked out of home at 18. He was pretty much my partner in crime. He was more than a friend to me back the, he never knew I had feelings for him (not that I'm gay or Hetro...
    WokenandOpen WokenandOpen 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 19

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    R.i.p.

    You were an incredible friend. You were so kind and tender. You were never cruel to anyone. I am so sorry it happened like this. I don't pretend to know what was happening in your life, but you changed everyones' lives for the better who knew you. You were such a gentle person...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Dec 14, 2012

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    Happy birthday, Jess.

    I haven't forgotten.
    Sicarium Sicarium 36-40, M Sep 2, 2014

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    Suicide of a loved one survivors Hard to sleep

    when others think it was any thing but suicide. I always thought since I was the one who found the body, and the neighbor heard the gun go off fifteen minutes after I left for work, well, and the police and corner's pictures all pointed towards a self inflicted. In his white...
    jaymepopejoy jaymepopejoy 56-60, F 4 Responses Jun 25

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    When I was little, my mom

    and dad were separated. I'd go to his house every other weekend. Then he stopped coming to pick me up for a couple months and nobody knew why. Then my mom got a call one day and she started crying. I didn't know why, but I knew it was a deep, internal cry. Something my mom...
    ImJustMeAlex ImJustMeAlex 18-21, F 13 Responses Jul 11, 2014

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    I hate myself! how I wish I was there

    when he needed me the most. why did you do it? we were just talking last Saturday. I had a feeling you did something wrong when you said "you're done" I wished I didn't went to sleep that night to keep you away from those bad thoughts. I can't still believe that you took your...
    khrystyn khrystyn 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 20

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    So this is just funny to ppl.

    . How low.. Really low and to tell someone to take their life too is f*cked up
    FukYuhITellTheTruth FukYuhITellTheTruth 18-21, F 3 Responses Jun 30

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    On April 23, 2015 my ex boyfriend committed

    suicide.. We had started dating on April 29, 2014 and we broke up July 18, 2014 and I know that is not a very long relationship, but somehow between, the hugs, kisses, talks, smiles, and laughs I fell in love with him and I guess he didn't fall in love with me.. August 15, 2014...
    Brina99 Brina99 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 18

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    She was my cousin.My best friend.

    I miss her so much.She was drinking with her friends and she came home and her sisters started roaring at her and she ran out of the house and to my uncles house across the way she ran down to the river and jumped in.I found out she was found in the river at school.I nearly died...
    MusicLover4Eternity MusicLover4Eternity 13-15, F 7 Responses Jul 21

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    ashlynthewolf I think is her username.

    .. this gave me reasons to hate ep. everyone wanted her dead and they kept explaining how it would be an amazing thing if she had. well you know what? most of the people who talked to her are now the cause of her death and this ****** me off. I loved her and I cared for her and...
    Mistakesmakeus Mistakesmakeus 18-21, M 20 Responses Jan 22

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    here it is. Today. 6 years gone.

    We love and miss you more than you know. You're really missing out. Your precious girl is so much like you and growing up without her mom. I choose life. I choose to ignore the psycho on this site who had the nerve to blame me for your decision. I choose to honor your memory by...
    iusedtolovemyself iusedtolovemyself 46-50, F 8 Responses Jun 29

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    My big brother. He hung himself

    because he was bullied for being gay. I miss him more and more everyday. Rest in Paradise Richard <3 I love you. It still hurts, even though this happened nearly two years ago. May 5th will make two years since he's been gone. I just have to remind myself he's no longer in...
    shipmateelyssa shipmateelyssa 16-17, F 7 Responses May 3, 2014

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    My Best Friend....

    My best friend... we were both in 8th grade... She was beautiful, but she got bullied by not just girls... guys. She was called fat and she was called ugly... I tried to protect her... but then she got a facebook... by the time I realized what was happening on facebook, it was to...
    ADemonsFate ADemonsFate 18-21, M 14 Responses Oct 27, 2013

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    My Little Girl...

    This is such a hard thing to do. And honestly... I thought I would never be able to share something so hurtful and one of the causes of this terrible state I'm in... but I just read the story of one of my new EP friends, and have the feeling (can be mistaken) that finding the...
    sweetmeisje sweetmeisje 26-30, F 14 Responses Oct 31, 2009

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    I Was Waiting Until I Was Ready to Write This,,,

                                           A Dedication To Maddie        ...
    QueenOfHearts QueenOfHearts 22-25, F 33 Responses Oct 1, 2009

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    My Mom

    Sep 25, 2013 It hurts way more than I thought it would. It's like my mom was two different people. I want to throw up just thinking about it. Her service is Wednesday and I'm dreading it. I can't stop getting into a panic just thinking about it. I'm nervous because its her...
    leestrauss leestrauss 22-25, M 8 Responses Oct 1, 2013

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    [open letter] RIP Josh.

    I've been listening to your playlist. Honestly, I need you more than ever now. Some days I feel like ****. Some days I really do just want to quit and leave everything. But I will never forget my promise to you. I'm carrying on for the both of us. I miss you so much. I miss...
    EnigmaSings EnigmaSings 22-25, F Jul 16, 2014

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    I just found out my dad killed himself yesterday

    and I feel really really weird
    nachocheese0987 nachocheese0987 18-21, F 11 Responses Jun 28

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    in 2001 I lost my father to alcohol,

    drugs,and suicide. in all honesty the drugs and alcohol had taken him long before that. he hit my mother and siblings, but for some reason I still love him. even tho I have memories of him they are so vague and blurry, I can't even remember his voice. that's the part I hate the...
    Rache06 Rache06 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 1

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    3 years ago I lost my brother to suicide.

    ..and I swear it seems to never get easier to deal with...R.I.P Josh..until we meet again...love u
    gabrielle04 gabrielle04 26-30, F 10 Responses Apr 29

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    My Daughter Megan Shot And Killed Herself 11/3/13

    I just can't let her go. I was kept from seeing her with the best intentions. Maybe that's why I still can't believe it.
    megankentsmom megankentsmom 41-45, F 12 Responses Nov 21, 2013

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    Hello. My husband committed suicide I still

    can't believe it. He did it the last day of March this year. He was my caretaker he helped me with everything. I can't walk very good. Plus I just had surgery in May I wish I saw the signs. They were all there I ignored them.
    coolcindy59 coolcindy59 56-60, F 1 Response Jul 10

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    A Sign

    If you are thinkin of committing suicide tonight and you are looking for a sign not to, here is your sign. Do not committ suicide because there is so much ahead for you. I love you and I believe in you. You are amazing
    flippersteen flippersteen 22-25, F 1 Response May 22, 2013

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    June 27, 2015 : Stardate June 27,

    1990. He let me go to sleep that night knowing he would put than damn shotgun to his chest the next day. Knowing it would be me to find the bloody mess. How dare he think me such a friend.
    jaymepopejoy jaymepopejoy 56-60, F 7 Responses Jun 28

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