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I Lost Someone To Suicide

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 6,536 People

    I was adopted at 1 day old

    and I always knew I was. I just accepted my mother and father as my parents and didn't really think about the fact that we aren't blood related. But when I was 10 I found out my birth father committed suicide. It honestly still bothers me because I never got to meet him. It's...
    Madi1000 Madi1000 13-15, F 4 Responses Jun 13

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    My Little Girl...

    This is such a hard thing to do. And honestly... I thought I would never be able to share something so hurtful and one of the causes of this terrible state I'm in... but I just read the story of one of my new EP friends, and have the feeling (can be mistaken) that finding the...
    sweetmeisje sweetmeisje 26-30, F 12 Responses Oct 31, 2009

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    My Best Friend....

    My best friend... we were both in 8th grade... She was beautiful, but she got bullied by not just girls... guys. She was called fat and she was called ugly... I tried to protect her... but then she got a facebook... by the time I realized what was happening on facebook, it was to...
    ADemonsFate ADemonsFate 16-17, M 12 Responses Oct 27, 2013

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    I lost One of my closest friends in 2011.

    I still mourn the loss and I still think about him every day. My parents keep telling me I need to "get over it" but they don't understand.. They've never lost anyone to suicide. They don't realize that it's different than losing someone to a different kind of death. This stays...
    amazingcuzitis amazingcuzitis 18-21, F Nov 9

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    riddlesmile riddlesmile 31-35, M 3 Responses Oct 27

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    I met Noah and his brother in 2013.

    We were both in a dark place in our lives and pretty lost. His brother simon was the most beautiful person in the world and kept us both balanced. Through a crazy turn of events, we began a relationship in February of 2014 and stayed together until his death in June of 2014. His...
    MindlessMatters MindlessMatters 22-25, M 1 Response Nov 9

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    My World Lost A Beautiful But Tragic Woman.

    My mother was a stunning woman. She was of irish, french and tahitian heritage. The clearest blue eyes, dark curly long mane for hair, a models body with the height to match. Apple of her fathers eye, eldest of three, spoiled by the love of a family. She had everything. She had...
    DarkHeartLove DarkHeartLove 26-30, F 6 Responses Jul 10, 2012

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    as the one year marked passed in September of

    my Brothers life ending choice I find myself missing him more. missing the comfort he provided when I was down. I wish I could have done that for him. I still blame myself. I should have known or had a clue...but I didn't. I had no idea he was so unhappy and thought it was the...
    MsInked511 MsInked511 26-30, F 3 Responses Nov 5

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    i doubt anyone will reply.

    ..no one did to the other post i put up. I lost my first cousin to suicide in may. he jumped off a bridge and his body was never found. so we never had a service or a headstone or a formal memorial. i lost another cousin a year ago this november 20th to suicide also. that will...
    katariffik katariffik 31-35, F 9 Responses Nov 18

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    It's been two years this June

    since my cousin killed himself. My brother still loses his mind and sobs.... I'm not sure how I can help him or myself truly heal from this.
    leaguegirl97 leaguegirl97 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 15

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    I Didn't Think I Would Actually Share This Here

    I really try to not dwell in the past, but someone asked a question this week that reminded me of the unique circumstances around surviving the suicide of someone you love.   My husband took his own life four years ago.  It was not his first attempt, although I had...
    edgargeorge edgargeorge 41-45, F 32 Responses Jul 31, 2009

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    I thought he was killed.

    That's what my family kept saying for years. Now, I know the true, he hated living with my father so much that he killed himself. I loved him, he was my brother. I'm so sad he's gone.. We should have done something to get him out of there..
    everybodywantshappiness everybodywantshappiness 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 15

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    Two People

    I was one of the first people to discover Alice dead. She had been growing quite distant for some time and one day she said to come to her house to talk with her a little. I was overjoyed! She's reaching out! I quickly put on some good clothes and walked to her place. The door...
    EmpowermentProject EmpowermentProject 31-35, F 9 Responses Jun 5, 2013

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    I Was Waiting Until I Was Ready to Write This,,,

                                           A Dedication To Maddie        ...
    QueenOfHearts QueenOfHearts 22-25, F 33 Responses Oct 1, 2009

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    When I was little, my mom

    and dad were separated. I'd go to his house every other weekend. Then he stopped coming to pick me up for a couple months and nobody knew why. Then my mom got a call one day and she started crying. I didn't know why, but I knew it was a deep, internal cry. Something my mom...
    ImJustMeAlex ImJustMeAlex 18-21, F 13 Responses Jul 11

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    Bitter Battle Between Parents - Result : Daughter Commits Suicide

    The most important thing I've learned in life is not to let one's conflict with someone else affect others. Let it affect only the combatants and not innocent 3rd parties. My daughter committed suicide in part because this lesson was not learned early in life. Her parents allowed...
    sakamato sakamato 51-55, M 4 Responses Mar 3, 2007

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    I lost my father 5 years ago.

    I miss him so so much. Not a day goes by that I'm not thinking about him. I miss his smile, his smell, his laughter, everything little thing about him. If only I would've known how depressed he was. I was 18 and so wrapped up in my stupid teenage life, I didn't think to look...
    nukeemhigh nukeemhigh 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 3

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    I lost my sister to suicide almost 2 years ago

    on November 24th.. it haunts me everyday.. We were close at a time and then it went down hill.. I'm reminded of her everyday and it hurts.. it's been a crazy year.. moved in with my boyfriend, finished school, read a few great books.. but I just feel like I lost my self since...
    Allaboutacupoftea Allaboutacupoftea 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 17

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    Two of my friends committed suicide recently.

    Both were married and both had a child. The first time was a shock, but before I had the chance to get closure, I found my other friend dead at his house. I still can't get the image of his dead body out of my head and I had to inform his wife and I'll never forget her scream...
    MrMoJo13 MrMoJo13 31-35, M 6 Responses Jan 31

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    At my gymnastics club,

    one of my teams favorite coach, leader, and "mom" was killed in a murder/suicide. Her and her husband had been arguing when she called the cops, but when they got there it was too late. Her husband had killed her than himself. Worst part being, he did it in the gym. Prayers are...
    Theycallherelly Theycallherelly 13-15, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    A Sign

    If you are thinkin of committing suicide tonight and you are looking for a sign not to, here is your sign. Do not committ suicide because there is so much ahead for you. I love you and I believe in you. You are amazing
    flippersteen flippersteen 22-25, F 1 Response May 22, 2013

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    Even though it's been almost 6 years I still

    can't go a day without wanting to call you! Every time I hear your favorite song , see a dragonfly , or see anything purple I think of you. When you left ,a piece of my heart went with you to keep until we meet again, because nothing and no one will ever fill that void!
    FallenAngel0 FallenAngel0 31-35, F 2 Responses Oct 23

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    R.i.p.

    You were an incredible friend. You were so kind and tender. You were never cruel to anyone. I am so sorry it happened like this. I don't pretend to know what was happening in your life, but you changed everyones' lives for the better who knew you. You were such a gentle person...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Dec 14, 2012

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    I think the worst part about losing someone to

    suicide is when you see them spiraling down, and you know there isn't much you can do. I didn't ever know how to help him and next thing I knew it was over.
    avabellaforb avabellaforb 22-25, F 1 Response Mar 30

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    Saying Goodbye To Luke

    I cannot believe it has been almost two years since we lost you. My emotions at times can feel just as raw as the day you left. But then there are days where you don’t cross my mind, almost like it was a nightmare, long forgotten, lost in a childhood full of dreams.Saying...
    girlbythebay girlbythebay 22-25, F 9 Responses Nov 7, 2011

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    He killed himself today.

    .. I miss him more than anything.... I wish that I was there for him more...
    BloodRedDarkness BloodRedDarkness 16-17, F 9 Responses Nov 17

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    Kinda self-explanatory.

    Since I lost my father two years ago, I can't eat or form normally functioning relationships. I do a lot of drugs, and am barely passing my college classes. I'm drowning out here.
    bruhhhhhpls bruhhhhhpls 18-21, M 3 Responses Oct 25

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    My Daughter Megan Shot And Killed Herself 11/3/13

    I just can't let her go. I was kept from seeing her with the best intentions. Maybe that's why I still can't believe it.
    megankentsmom megankentsmom 41-45, F 11 Responses Nov 21, 2013

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    I Almost lost my "friend" twice

    but I was able to save her and now she doesn't even talk to me anymore.
    bvbandmcr bvbandmcr 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 16

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    It seems the people I get close to commit

    suicide :( 2nd one in the space of less than two years shows what an awful friend I am, I loved them though I don't even know if I can go on without them...i wish I could have stopped both of them from doing it and ik it's my fault that I couldn't stop them :( I want my friends...
    Il0veandre Il0veandre 13-15, T 7 Responses Nov 11

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    I don't really talk about him.

    Not because I'm mad or sad, I've been both of those things, but that's not why. He was my best friend in high school. The first two years of it anyway. We were both misfits, outcasts. He was the fat kid and I was the weird girl. Except he didn't see me like that. To him, I was...
    kbetweens kbetweens 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 27

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    How Suicide Has Effected My Life..

    I am writing this story after reading other peoples horrifying experiences with suicide.  Mine seems mild compared to some of the stories i have read on here. My experiences with suicide started with my Uncle Paul.  He shot himself when i was a toddler so i dont...
    kim8701 kim8701 18-21 14 Responses Jul 15, 2008

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    It has been ten years

    since my dad is gone. Whenever someone talks about family or my dad... My tears will fall immediately. Can anyone tell me how do I recover from this?
    applebeth applebeth 18-21, F 4 Responses Nov 13

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    She was fourteen when she first felt the

    emptiness within, a black hole in her soul. She stopped fighting it a couple of months later. She decided to live through the blade; letting its sharp lips draw kisses along her pale flesh. She was sixteen and by then all hope was lost, she had so many scars, countless as the...
    RozzebellConta RozzebellConta 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    My best friend, my mentor,

    my shoulder to cry on, sometime to laugh with, my daddy. I'm 22 years old and have mental illness myself (bi polar/OCD). Three months ago my daddy took his life, and when he did he took a large part of me with him. We had a bond that a lot of people don't get with their father...
    arigby arigby 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 16

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    My boyfriend's little sister committed suicide

    almost a year ago. He's in the marines and I probably won't be able to talk to him, but I want to do something for his mom, since now she's home alone without her son with her for the anniversary. I don't want to be too intrusive in case she doesn't want to be around people...
    Kaziopiah Kaziopiah 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 22

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    [open letter] RIP Josh.

    I've been listening to your playlist. Honestly, I need you more than ever now. Some days I feel like ****. Some days I really do just want to quit and leave everything. But I will never forget my promise to you. I'm carrying on for the both of us. I miss you so much. I miss...
    EnigmaSings EnigmaSings 22-25, F 1 Response Jul 16

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    His name was Dario and we met on a psych ward.

    He was doing well after he left hospital and got on to an art college programme. But his paranoia made him think all the other students hated him. He jumped from a car park a week ago. I don't know how to deal with it
    Ravenosiris Ravenosiris 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 30

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    He was 14 the first time I saw him.

    He was 16 when we met. He was 17 when he was no longer the boy I fell in love with. He was 18 when he died. He would be 21 today.
    amazingcuzitis amazingcuzitis 18-21, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    My big brother. He hung himself

    because he was bullied for being gay. I miss him more and more everyday. Rest in Paradise Richard <3 I love you. It still hurts, even though this happened nearly two years ago. May 5th will make two years since he's been gone. I just have to remind myself he's no longer in...
    shipmateelyssa shipmateelyssa 13-15, F 7 Responses May 3

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    Today I went to the cemetery to visit my

    cousin's plot. As I was sitting there I read his headstone inscription, and noted his date of birth. I sat there confounded and hurt. I was roughly eleven when he passed and he was twenty two. I sat there in utter shock, realizing he was about the same age I am now . It broke...
    MSCris MSCris 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 12

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    Ryan

    My best friend Ryan committed suicide 2 weeks ago yesterday. He's always been depressed and talked about it endlessly so I can't say it was a huge shock but it still hit me pretty hard..I'd never been to a funeral or even seen a corpse before and I had to be one of the pall...
    MrHazeinCherubsGrace MrHazeinCherubsGrace 26-30, M 38 Responses Nov 15, 2012

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    I lost my first love to suicide at age 19 (he

    was 20). I found him hanging in the attic. His parents were out of town…so I rode alone in the ambulance to the hospital with him. But I knew he was dead. I knew it then and I still knew when the doctor told me they were unable to revive him. In the hospital I stood alone...
    shylainey shylainey 22-25, F 7 Responses Apr 6

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    1 year and 3 months..

    I'm turning 21 in a couple of days, the age you were when you committed suicide. I think about it everyday and how we were soul mates. it's revelatory how someone can look past everything they have for something so futile and just end their existence without a moments notice.
    MooreVandervale MooreVandervale 18-21, M 2 Responses Nov 14

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    Happy birthday, Jess.

    I haven't forgotten.
    Sicarium Sicarium 36-40, M Sep 2

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    about a year ago i lost my sister

    because she took her own life. My family and i went out to dinner for my birthday and my sistef told us that she was feeling to "sick" to go. My mother didnt know that My sister was bullied or in depression. Heck she never saw the cuts on her arm or her legs, she was good at...
    meggg54 meggg54 16-17, F 1 Response Oct 26

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    I lost my boyfriend and best friend to suicide

    coming up 5 years ago. and I still miss him terribly. I still feel in shock really, and I still grieve. I get through the days now- I smile and I mean it. I can have conversations where I don't mention his name. I can live a pretty normal life. but when everyone goes home, the...
    electricgirl84 electricgirl84 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 24

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    Trevor was one of my best friends

    and past boyfriends but he just couldn't take it anymore i had no idea he had so many problems. He hid it well I miss him every day its almost been 4 years but feels like 4 days
    WendyDarlin WendyDarlin 18-21, F 8 Responses Jul 7

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    Suicide. Only One word.

    only Seven letters. Yet it holds such a powerful meaning to many lives. A few days ago.. My neighbor..my bestfriend.. My childhood friend.. I lost him to that powerful word.. He commited suicide and is no longer apart of us.. He may be gone but never forgotten.. I love you...
    believexo believexo 16-17, F 3 Responses Nov 4

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    It'll be 3 years in January

    but I lost my stepdad to suicide. It's his birthday today. That hit me over breakfast. It's also the first time I'm not with my mom for this day. And I feel awful. Even though he was selfish leading up to it, I still miss him. I wish I could stop. It'd be so much easier.
    mbellz424 mbellz424 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 19

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    His name was James and a piece of my heart was

    in love with him. He had piercing eyes and a kind smile. He would call me beautiful and parts of me would melt. He was a unique soul who embraced anyone he crossed paths with. Popular, athletic, artistic, and attractive. People said they didn't see it coming. I think that I...
    abcdefgh19 abcdefgh19 22-25, F 5 Responses Oct 27

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