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I Lost Someone To Suicide

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 9,329 People

    My best friend killed himself 3 weeks

    and 5 days ago. I don't really believe it. I know it's true but for the past three weeks I've thought, "this hurts so much. I need to call Eric to talk to him about it" and "if I call Eric right now, he'll answer. He always answers." Today's one of the bad days. I miss him so...
    ames14 ames14 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I don't really talk about him.

    Not because I'm mad or sad, I've been both of those things, but that's not why. He was my best friend in high school. The first two years of it anyway. We were both misfits, outcasts. He was the fat kid and I was the weird girl. Except he didn't see me like that. To him, I was...
    kbetweens kbetweens 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 27, 2014

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    Why did they go Did they know 2016 was

    coming Did they know wealth would win What did they know Aside from doctors faking caring And pill makers faking benefits For profit
    JustBipolarMe JustBipolarMe 46-50, M 1 Response Jan 10

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    EVERY time I see someone post a question

    or an experience about looking for ways to kill themselves, I ALWAYS post the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline number. 1-800-273-8255. Who knows? Maybe it's hopeless, but maybe I'm going to save someone's life. I've been to a point where I attempted it before, and I just...
    Boulier Boulier 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 8, 2015

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    My best friend's favorite song came on the radio

    and i had to turn it off i cant listen to it right now even after so long i just cant
    TeenmommyNikki TeenmommyNikki 16-17, F 3 Responses Jan 16

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    this year will be 7 years

    since I lost my daddy when I was 16. I miss him so much.
    lindseymc1993 lindseymc1993 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 17

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    well.... tonight one of Ashley's friends

    who knew her in real life messaged me saying that Ashley had committed suicide..... i had talked her out of it once before in the past, but i guess that wasn't enough..... she took her life on January 21st...... even though i didn't know much about her, i really wish i would've...
    randomgirl42 randomgirl42 18-21, F 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    My Mom

    Sep 25, 2013 It hurts way more than I thought it would. It's like my mom was two different people. I want to throw up just thinking about it. Her service is Wednesday and I'm dreading it. I can't stop getting into a panic just thinking about it. I'm nervous because its her...
    leestrauss leestrauss 22-25, M 8 Responses Oct 1, 2013

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    so I see a lot of questions being asked such

    as "what does it feel like" etc and I just wanted to give my perspective. it's unbelievable. every second that passes without them. just to know that they had been going through something terrible and heartbreaking but they didn't even bother telling you, you, someone who...
    sxvenfxld sxvenfxld 13-15, F 2 Responses Jan 19

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    I lost my little sister to suicide on May 23,

    2015. I miss her so much. I wish she was still here. My life is now broken into before she died and after. I hope she is no longer in pain and her boyfriend/partner finds peace.
    redmawbk redmawbk 36-40, F 9 Responses Sep 16, 2015

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    I lost the love of my life Dec 23rd last year

    to suicide. This past month has been the worst time of my life. The night before he died we had exchanged rings. We had been together almost 4 years and throughout that time he had talked of suicide but only when he was really drunk and coming off a bender. You see he was an...
    Sarah8183 Sarah8183 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 25

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    I still wonder if there's anything I could have

    said to help you. I know you had gone through some serious stuff, and I remember telling you that I was here if you needed me. It's been a long time 24 years, but I still remember your little red geo metro, me and the kids piled up in it, and we all went to the zoo. The giraffe...
    ZenLioness ZenLioness 46-50, F 7 Responses Jan 29

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    My World Lost A Beautiful But Tragic Woman.

    My mother was a stunning woman. She was of irish, french and tahitian heritage. The clearest blue eyes, dark curly long mane for hair, a models body with the height to match. Apple of her fathers eye, eldest of three, spoiled by the love of a family. She had everything. She had...
    DarkHeartLove DarkHeartLove 26-30, F 6 Responses Jul 10, 2012

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    I Was Waiting Until I Was Ready to Write This,,,

                                           A Dedication To Maddie        ...
    QueenOfHearts QueenOfHearts 22-25, F 31 Responses Oct 1, 2009

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    Ryan

    My best friend Ryan committed suicide 2 weeks ago yesterday. He's always been depressed and talked about it endlessly so I can't say it was a huge shock but it still hit me pretty hard..I'd never been to a funeral or even seen a corpse before and I had to be one of the pall...
    MrHazeinCherubsGrace MrHazeinCherubsGrace 26-30, M 45 Responses Nov 15, 2012

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    Yes, I have lost a family member to suicide.

    It was my first husband. We loved each other very much and we had three beautiful boys together. My husband was a military officer and had been to the Middle East war zones repeated times and it took its toll on him mentally. My husband was diagnosed with PTSD. He did not...
    happygoluckywife happygoluckywife 36-40, F 5 Responses Mar 19, 2014

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    I lost my childhood best friend,

    James, 4 years ago in July. We had lost touch in our adult lives but I always enjoyed running into him at work and getting a big bear hug. He always knew what I needed. I miss him everyday. Something always reminds me of him. It is a terrible feeling watching his family grieve...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jan 15

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    I Didn't Think I Would Actually Share This Here

    I really try to not dwell in the past, but someone asked a question this week that reminded me of the unique circumstances around surviving the suicide of someone you love.   My husband took his own life four years ago.  It was not his first attempt, although I had...
    edgargeorge edgargeorge 41-45, F 32 Responses Jul 31, 2009

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    Two friends in 3 months.

    A childhood friend whose brother & farther were already lost to suicide. Mom, I never had a real on due to her yearly attempts. She's still kicking but we have no connection
    teadiva teadiva 31-35, F Jan 7

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    I Lost My Dad To Suicide.....Paul Anthony.

    ([Edit] Just noticed over 2000 people have read this. I hope some of you found a tiny bit of something to relate to. and thank you all so much for taking the time to read this ) I found this thread so am taking a few moments to just put my experience out there. Feel kinda kooky...
    CharlieUniform CharlieUniform 31-35, F 73 Responses Apr 24, 2011

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    Today marks one year

    since my friend Carley Rose died. I miss that big smile of hers :c RIP angel save me a spot in Heaven.
    cute4me cute4me 16-17, T 2 Responses Jan 19

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    Tomorrow marks 10 years

    since we lost my brother. So far things haven't gotten any easier with time. I still get that weird knot in my throat around this time of year. Not so sure that it'll ever get easier, even though people always say it will.
    chickenstrips chickenstrips 18-21, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Two People

    I was one of the first people to discover Alice dead. She had been growing quite distant for some time and one day she said to come to her house to talk with her a little. I was overjoyed! She's reaching out! I quickly put on some good clothes and walked to her place. The door...
    EmpowermentProject EmpowermentProject 31-35, F 8 Responses Jun 5, 2013

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    When I was around thirteen,

    I watched my biological mother try to kill herself, and being the only one with her at the time had to call another adult to come help get her to a hospital. Luckily she survived. When I was fifteen, I remember my Nona telling me one of her classmates had killed himself at the...
    ToughLoveKitten ToughLoveKitten 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 26

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    3 years ago I lost my brother to suicide.

    ..and I swear it seems to never get easier to deal with...R.I.P Josh..until we meet again...love u
    gabrielle04 gabrielle04 26-30, F 8 Responses Apr 29, 2015

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    My big brother. He hung himself

    because he was bullied for being gay. I miss him more and more everyday. Rest in Paradise Richard <3 I love you. It still hurts, even though this happened nearly two years ago. May 5th will make two years since he's been gone. I just have to remind myself he's no longer in...
    shipmateelyssa shipmateelyssa 16-17, F 7 Responses May 3, 2014

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    I meet her here... We used to talk everyday,

    and when she confess me her depression, we talked even more, I was always there to support her, and she was always there for me. Then she found a boyfriend, I was so happy that she wasn't alone, cuz even that we talked everyday, I was just an online friend, we slowly stop...
    Rustedarmor Rustedarmor 22-25, M 2 Responses Jan 22

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    A good friend of my best friend committed

    suicide on Tuesday. I just wish he could see everything that people have posted and said about how much they love him and miss him. He had so much to live for and so many people cared about him. calling my best friend to tell him that our friend killed himself was probably one...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Jan 16

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    Bitter Battle Between Parents - Result : Daughter Commits Suicide

    The most important thing I've learned in life is not to let one's conflict with someone else affect others. Let it affect only the combatants and not innocent 3rd parties. My daughter committed suicide in part because this lesson was not learned early in life. Her parents allowed...
    sakamato sakamato 51-55, M 4 Responses Mar 3, 2007

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    I just lost a friend to suicide.

    I'm broken I need to talk with someone
    russianangel russianangel 18-21, F 19 Responses Oct 11, 2015

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    She was this amazing girl,

    we used to talk and she'd be so open & free, like she's in heaven, I could have fallen in love with her, we were poking each other on Facebook, she poked me, I poked back at 9PM, then she pokes back at around 3AM, and sends a message, I checked the poke, it seemed OK, though she...
    curiousdweller curiousdweller 22-25, T 7 Responses Jan 29

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    Saying Goodbye To Luke

    I cannot believe it has been almost two years since we lost you. My emotions at times can feel just as raw as the day you left. But then there are days where you don’t cross my mind, almost like it was a nightmare, long forgotten, lost in a childhood full of dreams.Saying...
    girlbythebay girlbythebay 22-25, F 7 Responses Nov 7, 2011

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    One of my friends committed suicide on Friday,

    January 8th, 2016. I didn't even know her that well, and I still balled my eyes out and I'm still crying writing this. If I barely even knew her I can't imagine how her friends and family must feel, and just imagine, it was probably her parents who found her, they must have been...
    xXShellyBeanXx xXShellyBeanXx 13-15, F 3 Responses Jan 11

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    My first boyfriend's name was Robert.

    He was a brooder. He thought about things a lot. I liked him a lot. But his was an obsessive nature which was very time managinng. At the age of fifteen, in 2013, he threw himself through his bedroom window. He had a white cord around his, neck, and his copy in his pocket...
    Beannie97 Beannie97 18-21, F 5 Responses Jan 13

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    When I was little, my mom

    and dad were separated. I'd go to his house every other weekend. Then he stopped coming to pick me up for a couple months and nobody knew why. Then my mom got a call one day and she started crying. I didn't know why, but I knew it was a deep, internal cry. Something my mom...
    ImJustMeAlex ImJustMeAlex 18-21, F 12 Responses Jul 11, 2014

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    My child attempted and failed

    but the whole experience was traumatic. My heart is with each of you who is suffering.
    v0lition v0lition 41-45, F 2 Responses Jan 22

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    As far as I'm concerned anyone

    who commits suicide is my friend. Life is so hard, so torturous. I know exactly how they feel.
    QuestionMarks QuestionMarks 41-45, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    My sister took her life 5 mos ago.

    I still have to walk myself through this new reality forgetting or finding it impossible to believe that this actually happened. Life is tricky and unpredictable right now. Feel wildly insecure and unbalanced. I'm finding it nearly impossible to do anything I used to find fun. I...
    missdioggi missdioggi 36-40, F 16 Responses Jan 9, 2015

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    ashlynthewolf I think is her username.

    .. this gave me reasons to hate ep. everyone wanted her dead and they kept explaining how it would be an amazing thing if she had. well you know what? most of the people who talked to her are now the cause of her death and this ****** me off. I loved her and I cared for her and...
    Mistakesmakeus Mistakesmakeus 18-21, M 23 Responses Jan 22, 2015

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    I lost my brother July this year to suicide he

    was dealing with a lot of inner demons as I am too we were sexually, mentally and physically abused by our father I have a investigation going on to charge him for all he has done its hard living daily without someone you'll never see again.
    beccalovesmovies beccalovesmovies 22-25, F 4 Responses Jan 19

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    I miss my gay best friend

    so much.. :( He's name was Adam and we met when I went to America to study there. Unfortunately he was a loner and me being the shy but kind girl, i approached him and we became instant best friends. It's because we could relate to each other's problems. I met him at the age of...
    xXGothicAngelxx xXGothicAngelxx 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 16

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    My older brother Chad <3 He was 33

    when he took his life. back in 2012. doesn't seem that long ago. I miss him terribly.
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Aug 25, 2015

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    I lost someone to suicide.

    not a very close person, I had only met him once, but when I did it wasnt awkward, or strange, it was like we were instantly friends, just like close. he was 17, I'm 14. I wasn't even allowed to go to the funeral. when he was 12, he tried to hang himself but his mother found him...
    sxvenfxld sxvenfxld 13-15, F 2 Responses Jan 10

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    Exactly one week ago.

    The wound is still open and bleeding. Miss you incredibly my angel, what have you done.. Hope you feel better now, wherever you are :-) may your soul rest in peace and may god have mercy on mine.
    russianangel russianangel 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 14, 2015

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    Grief is a funny thing.

    It sneaks up on you, quietly, stealthily, then mugs you of your belongings in a dark alleyway. Sometimes you can feel it coming, sometimes you don't. It comes in stages, like unwrapping a present from your grandmother you know you'll want to return, but instead you'll wear it...
    PaigeLawley PaigeLawley 16-17, F 6 Responses 2 days ago

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