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I Lost Someone To Suicide

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 7,823 People

    My sister took her life 5 mos ago.

    I still have to walk myself through this new reality forgetting or finding it impossible to believe that this actually happened. Life is tricky and unpredictable right now. Feel wildly insecure and unbalanced. I'm finding it nearly impossible to do anything I used to find fun. I...
    missdioggi missdioggi 36-40, F 17 Responses Jan 9

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    The telephone rings. It's troubling news.

    A father's distraught. I'm a daughter confused. A flood of emotions, Agony afflicting my mind. Will my prayers be answered, If I can make it on time? At the end of my tortuous drive, While I'm unlatching his gate, I hear that echoing sound, I know that I'm a minute too...
    Loverofpeace Loverofpeace 41-45, F 14 Responses Apr 16

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    I lost my first love to suicide at age 19 (he

    was 20). I found him hanging in the attic. His parents were out of town…so I rode alone in the ambulance to the hospital with him. But I knew he was dead. I knew it then and I still knew when the doctor told me they were unable to revive him. In the hospital I stood alone...
    shylainey shylainey 22-25, F 8 Responses Apr 6, 2014

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    Even though he was my EP friend I feel

    so heartbroken. He was my only friend :(
    SpiritualBunny SpiritualBunny 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 13

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    My name is jessica I'm 27 I lost my mom to

    suicide may17 th 2009 I'm starting a support group for families left behind after a suicide it called Julie's hope. I'm looking for other people that would under stand what I'm going through and to join me at my meetings I live in Garfield heights ohio message me or call me at...
    lifeafterasuicide lifeafterasuicide 26-30, F 7 Responses Aug 27, 2014

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    My Best Friend....

    My best friend... we were both in 8th grade... She was beautiful, but she got bullied by not just girls... guys. She was called fat and she was called ugly... I tried to protect her... but then she got a facebook... by the time I realized what was happening on facebook, it was to...
    ADemonsFate ADemonsFate 18-21, M 13 Responses Oct 27, 2013

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    September 14th 2014 I lost my younger sister to

    suicide and i miss her so much and wish I could have done somthing so she could be alive today but she ended up only able to stay alive for a few hours after she committed suicide but at least I got to tell her I love her
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response a week ago

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    My friend committed suicide on my birthday.

    Since then, my parents doesn't know about it. I've been depressed about it.
    TheHauntedSoul TheHauntedSoul 16-17, T 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    I've never really posted anything about him

    before. You'd have thought I would, considering I've been so open with everything else. But I had a conversation with someone else, who made me realise that it is real, and pretending like it isn't simply will not make it go away. He killed himself, that's it. One of my best...
    betruetoyourself14 betruetoyourself14 13-15, F 4 Responses Feb 16

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    I lost one of my only friends to suicide.

    I wish I could talk to her just one more time. I always wonder if there is something that I could have done... I always wonder if there's something I could have said... I miss her so much... She's only been gone for about a month now but it seems like she's been gone for an...
    TheRealSamsClub TheRealSamsClub 13-15, F 1 Response May 4

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    My best friend killed himself last night.

    He was an amazing person and like a brother to me. And now he's gone. I can't stop crying.
    FireFlames FireFlames 18-21, M 6 Responses Apr 14

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    My Little Girl...

    This is such a hard thing to do. And honestly... I thought I would never be able to share something so hurtful and one of the causes of this terrible state I'm in... but I just read the story of one of my new EP friends, and have the feeling (can be mistaken) that finding the...
    sweetmeisje sweetmeisje 26-30, F 14 Responses Oct 31, 2009

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    It's been almost half a year

    and yet I still think about my grandfather almost daily. It's agonizing because I can still try to ignore it and go about my work when I'm busy, but at night before I fall asleep there's nothing to distract myself with and all the emotions just come pouring out. I always end up...
    pistachiobagel pistachiobagel 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    When I was little, my mom

    and dad were separated. I'd go to his house every other weekend. Then he stopped coming to pick me up for a couple months and nobody knew why. Then my mom got a call one day and she started crying. I didn't know why, but I knew it was a deep, internal cry. Something my mom...
    ImJustMeAlex ImJustMeAlex 18-21, F 13 Responses Jul 11, 2014

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    April 16th will mark the one year anniversary

    since I lost my father to suicide. One year later, and it still hurts that your not here to hold me, go tell me everything will be okay. One year later, and I still cry knowing how long it's been since I've heard your sweet voice or have smelt your strong, but welcoming cologne...
    hrose69702 hrose69702 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 12

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    Ryan

    My best friend Ryan committed suicide 2 weeks ago yesterday. He's always been depressed and talked about it endlessly so I can't say it was a huge shock but it still hit me pretty hard..I'd never been to a funeral or even seen a corpse before and I had to be one of the pall...
    MrHazeinCherubsGrace MrHazeinCherubsGrace 26-30, M 43 Responses Nov 15, 2012

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    My Daughter Megan Shot And Killed Herself 11/3/13

    I just can't let her go. I was kept from seeing her with the best intentions. Maybe that's why I still can't believe it.
    megankentsmom megankentsmom 41-45, F 12 Responses Nov 21, 2013

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    My Mom

    Sep 25, 2013 It hurts way more than I thought it would. It's like my mom was two different people. I want to throw up just thinking about it. Her service is Wednesday and I'm dreading it. I can't stop getting into a panic just thinking about it. I'm nervous because its her...
    leestrauss leestrauss 22-25, M 8 Responses Oct 1, 2013

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    my husband killed himself.

    left myself and a 2 year old boy. our son is four now and I still miss him so much. I have moved on and have an amazing boyfriend but I still think about him everyday. I am just so sad. I fight depression daily. been on a ton of different meds. nothing is working. the worst part...
    kayliw kayliw 26-30, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    My step mom, almost 10 years ago now.

    I miss her. Mothers day is one of the hardest days of the year. Today has been rough. :(
    maggiemae89 maggiemae89 26-30, F 5 Responses May 11

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    I think the worst part about losing someone to

    suicide is when you see them spiraling down, and you know there isn't much you can do. I didn't ever know how to help him and next thing I knew it was over.
    avabellaforb avabellaforb 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 30, 2014

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    How Suicide Has Effected My Life..

    I am writing this story after reading other peoples horrifying experiences with suicide.  Mine seems mild compared to some of the stories i have read on here. My experiences with suicide started with my Uncle Paul.  He shot himself when i was a toddler so i dont...
    kim8701 kim8701 18-21 16 Responses Jul 15, 2008

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    Two People

    I was one of the first people to discover Alice dead. She had been growing quite distant for some time and one day she said to come to her house to talk with her a little. I was overjoyed! She's reaching out! I quickly put on some good clothes and walked to her place. The door...
    EmpowermentProject EmpowermentProject 31-35, F 8 Responses Jun 5, 2013

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    I can't believe it's over 2 years ago.

    He was the first one to show me it's ok to struggle but also the first one I knew who struggled. With his creativity and kindness came such an amount of sadness. He couldn't fight it any longer. He took his life just one week after his 16th birthday. Even though he died so young...
    VivienHope VivienHope 16-17, F 2 Responses May 21

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    My big brother. He hung himself

    because he was bullied for being gay. I miss him more and more everyday. Rest in Paradise Richard <3 I love you. It still hurts, even though this happened nearly two years ago. May 5th will make two years since he's been gone. I just have to remind myself he's no longer in...
    shipmateelyssa shipmateelyssa 16-17, F 7 Responses May 3, 2014

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    I miss you everyday, I think of you

    and sometimes I close my eyes so I can remember. I know the pain you felt was real and that the memories of war were too much for you to bare. PTSD was way too much and that night you took your precious life. I love you my dearest friend I hope and pray you have found peace.
    Oliviaa92 Oliviaa92 41-45, F a week ago

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    Bitter Battle Between Parents - Result : Daughter Commits Suicide

    The most important thing I've learned in life is not to let one's conflict with someone else affect others. Let it affect only the combatants and not innocent 3rd parties. My daughter committed suicide in part because this lesson was not learned early in life. Her parents allowed...
    sakamato sakamato 51-55, M 4 Responses Mar 3, 2007

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    I Was Waiting Until I Was Ready to Write This,,,

                                           A Dedication To Maddie        ...
    QueenOfHearts QueenOfHearts 22-25, F 33 Responses Oct 1, 2009

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    I don't really talk about him.

    Not because I'm mad or sad, I've been both of those things, but that's not why. He was my best friend in high school. The first two years of it anyway. We were both misfits, outcasts. He was the fat kid and I was the weird girl. Except he didn't see me like that. To him, I was...
    kbetweens kbetweens 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 27, 2014

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    I lost an old friend to suicide 3 months ago.

    Maybe if we had stayed friends I could have done something to help.
    imsoclassic imsoclassic 16-17, F 4 Responses Apr 29

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    Even now, after over a year,

    I still can't truly believe it. I still can't get my head around the fact that I'll never hear his voice, I'll never see his smile again. And it just breaks my heart every time that realisation sinks in a little more. I'm the only one who knows why he did it. And it kills me to...
    betruetoyourself14 betruetoyourself14 13-15, F Apr 14

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    3 years ago I lost my brother to suicide.

    ..and I swear it seems to never get easier to deal with...R.I.P Josh..until we meet again...love u
    gabrielle04 gabrielle04 26-30, F 10 Responses Apr 29

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    testing11 testing11 51-55, M 4 Responses Apr 18

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    Saying Goodbye To Luke

    I cannot believe it has been almost two years since we lost you. My emotions at times can feel just as raw as the day you left. But then there are days where you don’t cross my mind, almost like it was a nightmare, long forgotten, lost in a childhood full of dreams.Saying...
    girlbythebay girlbythebay 22-25, F 9 Responses Nov 7, 2011

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    Ive just heard that a dear friend of mine has

    taken their own life, I feel saddened shocked hurt and ******* angry
    wheels1972 wheels1972 41-45, M 4 Responses Apr 24

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    I Didn't Think I Would Actually Share This Here

    I really try to not dwell in the past, but someone asked a question this week that reminded me of the unique circumstances around surviving the suicide of someone you love.   My husband took his own life four years ago.  It was not his first attempt, although I had...
    edgargeorge edgargeorge 41-45, F 32 Responses Jul 31, 2009

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    My friend Ryan. We never talked much

    but I wish we had spent more time together. I miss him and pray that he found peace. I pray for his wife and daughter as well. I forgive him.
    ForTheFallen ForTheFallen 22-25, M 1 Response a week ago

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    The police said it was suicide,

    all the evidence say otherwise. That's what happens in a third world country.
    koh72 koh72 41-45, M 2 Responses Apr 10

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    I lost my step brother to suicide.

    The feeling I got after I found out, was a feeling I've never had before with such intensity; the only way I can describe it is, it felt like actual heart-break. It was so intense that I thought it would never go away. The feeling passed, but I still feel upset to think about...
    BexBaby84 BexBaby84 31-35, F 2 Responses May 9

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    I Lost My Dad To Suicide.....Paul Anthony.

    ([Edit] Just noticed over 2000 people have read this. I hope some of you found a tiny bit of something to relate to. and thank you all so much for taking the time to read this ) I found this thread so am taking a few moments to just put my experience out there. Feel kinda kooky...
    CharlieUniform CharlieUniform 31-35, F 74 Responses Apr 24, 2011

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    [open letter] RIP Josh.

    I've been listening to your playlist. Honestly, I need you more than ever now. Some days I feel like ****. Some days I really do just want to quit and leave everything. But I will never forget my promise to you. I'm carrying on for the both of us. I miss you so much. I miss...
    EnigmaSings EnigmaSings 22-25, F Jul 16, 2014

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    DoubleEOneL DoubleEOneL 22-25, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I met Noah and his brother in 2013.

    We were both in a dark place in our lives and pretty lost. His brother simon was the most beautiful person in the world and kept us both balanced. Through a crazy turn of events, we began a relationship in February of 2014 and stayed together until his death in June of 2014. His...
    MindlessMatters MindlessMatters 22-25, M 1 Response Nov 9, 2014

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    A Sign

    If you are thinkin of committing suicide tonight and you are looking for a sign not to, here is your sign. Do not committ suicide because there is so much ahead for you. I love you and I believe in you. You are amazing
    flippersteen flippersteen 22-25, F 1 Response May 22, 2013

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    Happy birthday, Jess.

    I haven't forgotten.
    Sicarium Sicarium 36-40, M Sep 2, 2014

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    ashlynthewolf I think is her username.

    .. this gave me reasons to hate ep. everyone wanted her dead and they kept explaining how it would be an amazing thing if she had. well you know what? most of the people who talked to her are now the cause of her death and this ****** me off. I loved her and I cared for her and...
    highomeal highomeal 18-21, M 19 Responses Jan 22

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