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I Love a Good Laugh

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 71,830 People

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    If Superman owned sheep,

    would they have steel wool?
    mmorgan0678 mmorgan0678 41-45, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    Of course women don't work

    as hard as men...they get it right the first time.
    BeautifulSurprise BeautifulSurprise 36-40, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    When I was younger . .

    . . .I used to leave the gas cap hangin off when I went out on a date . . . .that way she would think I was pretty popular when people waved at me . . ..
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M 1 Response Aug 26

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    Young Love.

    A boy approached the girl's father and asked,"Sir,can I have your daughter's hand?"The father replied,"You might as well,since you've already had the rest of her." Hahahaha..just kidding!!!!😜
    teachocolate teachocolate 41-45, F 16 Responses Feb 9

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    A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day

    and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it!”
    seniordingdong seniordingdong 26-30, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    Dear algebra, Stop asking me to find your X.

    She's not coming back. I don't know Y either.
    placeborealis placeborealis 41-45, M 7 Responses Jun 24

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    A study has revealed

    that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: if she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be...
    expressomarkie expressomarkie 46-50, M 16 Responses Feb 3

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    Laughing so hard, no noise coming out,

    so you sit there clapping like a retarded seal.
    BeautifulSurprise BeautifulSurprise 36-40, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    I asked a Chinese girl

    for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-*****...
    seniordingdong seniordingdong 26-30, M 6 days ago

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    Tried dark roast coffee.

    No cream No sugar. Result. Thats for people who love shaking their heads and grunting. Lmao.
    Converted Converted 46-50, M 6 days ago

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    Mother In Law After a husband

    and wife have a heated argument, the wife calls her mother. “He fought with me again! I’m coming over to live with you.”“No, no, darling,” replied the mother. “He must pay for his mistake. I’m coming to live with you.”From Reader's Digest.
    whitesunshine87 whitesunshine87 51-55, F 10 Responses Sep 22, 2014

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    Dear Warner Brothers: Now

    that I'm an adult, I feel I'm am old enough to hear what the "Beep Beep" is hiding when Road Runner talks to Wile E. Coyote.
    littlefroghere littlefroghere 41-45, F 14 Responses Apr 20

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    In 1964 Jack Weinberger,

    a free speech activist, said "Dont Trust anyone over 30". . . .I wonder if he trusts anyone over 80 now . . . .
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M 2 Responses Aug 26

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    Have you ever noticed .

    .. .. A person running around with a laptop chasing an unsecured WiFi signal. . . .. . . looks eerily like a cat chasing a laser pointer.. . .. . .
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M Aug 26

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    I got pulled over by a bicycle cop

    once . . . .he said "Do you know why I pulled you over ?". . . . I said "Hell NO, In Fact I dont even know why I stopped !"
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M 2 Responses Aug 26

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    A woman's mind is cleaner

    than a man's: She changes it more often.
    BeautifulSurprise BeautifulSurprise 36-40, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    my 5 yo niece told me this one today.

    "How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it". I'm still smiling.
    deleted deleted 26-30 12 Responses Feb 16

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    Some people say "If you can't beat them,

    join them". I say "If you can't beat them, beat them", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise.
    seniordingdong seniordingdong 26-30, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Of all the things I've lost,

    i miss my mind the most :)
    informal informal 31-35 6 days ago

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    Friendship between women: - OMG.

    I am so fat. - Silly, you are not fat, you are perfect. Friendship between men: - I am fat. - Yes dude. And ugly too. :-))
    placeborealis placeborealis 41-45, M 9 Responses Jun 19

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    I know it doesnt sound like much yet

    but hear me out , now on 4 in C. . . ." Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na BATMAN!!!!" Sooooo ? What do you think ?
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M Aug 26

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    Harry was shipwrecked on a deserted island.

    For several months, he longed for someone to talk to; searched the horizons for even the suggestion of a ship. One day, his committment was rewarded: A beautiful woman was washed up onto the beach, floating on a large steamer trunk. Harry got her all settled, and fed, and dried...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 6 Responses May 12

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    Pass it on (from a new friend) Girl: *calls

    911* Hello? I need your help! 911: Alright, What is it? Girl: Two boys are fighting over me! 911: So what's your emergency? Girl: The ugly one is winning.
    ladyryan ladyryan 41-45, F 13 Responses Dec 8, 2013

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    My neighbor's a moron .

    . .he volunteers as a cross walk guard a couple days a week , now he tells people he is in human trafficking. . . .
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M 7 Responses May 12

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    A man approached a very beautiful woman in a

    large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?" "Why?" "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."
    Sinjintiger Sinjintiger 41-45, M 4 Responses Feb 10

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    A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook

    for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess. The dad said, "Well it's what Mommy calls me sometimes." The little girl screamed to her brother, "Don't eat it. Its an *******!
    seniordingdong seniordingdong 26-30, M 6 days ago

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    My dear friend of 43 years passed away suddenly

    on Election day in November. She was my friend and sister (not biological) and knew everything about me..was there to witness everything. No one knew so much about my life or dysfunctional family.It's the kind of relationship that only comes once in a lifetime. During the last...
    Oddandsingular Oddandsingular 56-60, F 10 Responses Feb 24

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    I find it funny that 30-50 year old guys

    without profile pics and experiences all about sex message me and think im actually gonna reply 😂😂 dumbasses
    LoveEverMore LoveEverMore 13-15, F 11 Responses Jun 21

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    A successful man is one

    who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
    BeautifulSurprise BeautifulSurprise 36-40, F 6 Responses a week ago

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    There was a preacher

    who fell in the ocean and he couldn't swim. When a boat came by, the captain yelled, "Do you need help, sir?" The preacher calmly said "No, God will save me." A little later, another boat came by and a fisherman asked, "Hey, do you need help?" The preacher replied again, "No God...
    seniordingdong seniordingdong 26-30, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Just watched a commercial.

    . . . . . I dont get it . . . . ..How is it possible that the side effect for asthma medication is shortness of breath?
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M 1 Response Aug 26

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    When I'm really bored .

    . .I put a blank CD in and play it and turn the volume up to10. . . .it ****** the mime next door off
    woodyinya woodyinya 56-60, M 1 Response Aug 26

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    My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous.

    The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who the hell May was.
    placeborealis placeborealis 41-45, M 6 Responses Jun 23

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    the sun will always shine on those

    who live near the equator...
    Serendipitydoda Serendipitydoda 46-50, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    The teacher asked Jimmy,

    "Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?" Jimmy replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that p*ssy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"
    seniordingdong seniordingdong 26-30, M 6 days ago

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    The Mile High Club

    On a passenger flight, the pilot comes over the public address system as usual and to greet the passengers. He tells them at what altitude they’ll be flying, the expected arrival time, and a bit about the weather, and advises them to relax and have a good flight.. . Then...
    Myztikal Myztikal 41-45, F 18 Responses Oct 4, 2013

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    Last night, laying in bed with my wife,

    I said: "I love you.". She asked: "Is that you, or the beer talking?" I said: "It's me. Talking to the beer....".
    placeborealis placeborealis 41-45, M 17 Responses Jun 10

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    Cheating Wife

    A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the Head with a frying pan. "What was that for?" the man asked. The wife replied "That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket". The man then said "When I was at the...
    trilo2 trilo2 18-21, M 11 Responses Oct 31, 2011

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    Once I've advertised on Craigslist: "Wife

    wanted" I've got 23450 messages from men saying: "You can have mine".
    placeborealis placeborealis 41-45, M 13 Responses Jun 23

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    All I have to do is sit down with my brothers

    and Uncle, let them drink and talk, hit record on my phone...and I'm in tears for hours.
    dmc313 dmc313 26-30, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Lol this 15 year old just message me asking me

    for a picture of my d**k. And i just laughted at her message and told her "go play with ur dolls lil kid" this site is not only filled with pervs but also horny lil inmature 15 year old girls.
    Vinneh23 Vinneh23 22-25, M 4 Responses Jul 7, 2014

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    A husband visited a marriage counsellor

    and said,"When we were first married,I would come home from the office,my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking.Now after ten years it's all different.I come home,the dog brings my slippers and my wife runs around barking...
    teachocolate teachocolate 41-45, F 28 Responses Feb 7

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    My 6 yr old son was laying on my leather couch

    this morning watching cartoons when suddenly he sighed really loudly and said, "Mama, there's no butter on my back!" I'm sorry, what? "There's no butter on my back! I keep sticking to the couch!!"
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Jul 21, 2014

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    My 5 year old son has Charlie Brown pajamas,

    and he was wearing them this morning so I said, "Good morning, Charlie Brown!" His response was (with his R's making the /w/ and sometimes /h/ sound), "I am NOT Chahlie Bwown! I have tattoos and loads of haiw! Manliuh! Manliuh! Manliuh!!" That would be hair and manlier. He...
    deleted deleted 26-30 8 Responses Apr 6, 2014

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    Woke up with my credit card lying on my

    keyboard. I can't wait to see what drunk me bought sober me.
    littlefroghere littlefroghere 41-45, F 10 Responses Apr 9

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