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I Love Stupid Jokes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 814 People

    How Can You Drop An Egg

    4 feet and have is survive? Leave it in the chicken.
    coloco coloco 61-65, M 1 Response May 28, 2011

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    Stupid Joke #9

    How do you catch a squirrel?   You climb into a tree and act like a nut.   <hee hee>
    dyin2live dyin2live 31-35, F 3 Responses Feb 11, 2008

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    Stupid Joke #4

    Why do lions always eat raw meat? Because they don't know how to cook!  (Rimshot!)
    XW XW 46-50, M 2 Responses Jan 4, 2008

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    Stupid Joke #14

    A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that? "...
    dyin2live dyin2live 31-35, F 6 Responses May 31, 2008

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    WhatTheFrenchToast WhatTheFrenchToast 18-21, M Aug 19

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    Stupid Joke, #13

    Okay Ladies, maybe you won't think it is so stupid......   :-) A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath. · 'Mum', he asked, 'Are these my brains?' · 'Not yet,' she replied.    
    XW XW 46-50, M 2 Responses May 29, 2008

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    Stupid Joke #1

    I do love stupid jokes, they always make me snicker. A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Buddhist Monk walk into a bar, The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?" Hey, they can only get better (or stupider)!
    XW XW 46-50, M 1 Response Dec 29, 2007

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    Me: Who ever wondered

    why chocolate chips melt in your hand not the oven? You: Me! Me: Me too LOL
    iamnoor iamnoor 13-15, F 2 Responses Jun 28

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    Stupid Joke #2

    Okay, I'll jump in on this one...  here goes: How can you drop an egg four feet without breaking it? ... ... ...are you ready for the answer?... ... ... Drop it from five feet.  Then it won't break in the first four feet.       ...
    dyin2live dyin2live 31-35, F 5 Responses Dec 29, 2007

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    kitkat1000 kitkat1000 13-15, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Irish Wife

    Paddy is stopped by the cops, and gets really really loud and angry. his wife says "Ah you don't want to mind him, he's always like this when he has drink in him"
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M Oct 3, 2012

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    What did the duck say

    when she laid a square egg? "Ouch"
    rickie53 rickie53 41-45, M 1 Response Jan 20

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    So

    So this guy who suffers from premature *********** comes out of nowhere...
    KendraKitty KendraKitty 22-25, F 6 Responses Nov 21, 2013

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    Someone please spam me with laugh out loud

    jokes! In that kind of mood 😂
    kittyAloha kittyAloha 18-21, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    Okay It's a Bit Rubbish.....

    Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She couldn't control her pupils. Well I did tell you it was rubbish.......
    AWUK AWUK 26-30, F 2 Responses Feb 1, 2008

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    Stupid Joke #6

    A horse walks into a bar, the bartender looks up and says, "Hey!" The horse says, "Sure!" They just get worse!
    XW XW 46-50, M 2 Responses Jan 5, 2008

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    Stupid Jokes

    Stupid jokes,Love 'em,So corny,You have to laugh,They nearly make you sick!
    lazycrazybasket lazycrazybasket 46-50, M 1 Response Mar 28, 2012

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    Chinese

    "It's about time I told you an important thing," I said to my 15 year old son. "What is it dad?" He asked. "You were adopted," I murmured. "That's impossible!" He exclaimed, "We look the same." "Well," I replied, "That's because we are ******* Chinese."
    derekdob derekdob 56-60, M Nov 14, 2013

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    Stupid Joke #3

    Sally opened her refrigerator and found a rabbit inside. Surprised, she asked the rabbit, "What are you doing in my refrigerator?" "Isn't this a Westinghouse?" the rabbit asked. "Yes, it is," Sally answered. "Well, I'm westing,"...
    XW XW 46-50, M 8 Responses Jan 3, 2008

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    A Definition Of Irony

    Doing crazy stunts in your friends wheelchair, and you cripple yourself.
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M Oct 3, 2012

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    Silly But Funny

    I'm writing this slowly, Because i know you cant read very fast. I was going to send you some money, But I had the envelope sealed before I thought of it. Your sister had a baby, dont know what it is yet, So I don't know if your an aunt or an uncle.
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M 1 Response Oct 3, 2012

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    ebbiethebullet325 ebbiethebullet325 16-17, F 3 Responses Dec 25, 2013

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    What concert only cost 45 cents?

    50 cents featuring Nickelback *giggles*
    hiddenhands hiddenhands 13-15, F 2 Responses Feb 14

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    Two Monocles

    Two monocles got married, They made a spectacle of themselves.
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M Oct 3, 2012

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    Stupid Joke #15

    One more lame joke!   Nurse:  Doctor, there's an invisible man in the waiting room.       Doctor:  Tell him that I can't see him.      
    XW XW 46-50, M 3 Responses Jun 14, 2008

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    Stupid Joke #11

    What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are $4.50 per pound. And deer nuts are under a buck Cheers!  
    Nanoose Nanoose 51-55, M 2 Responses Feb 12, 2008

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    Stupid Joke #12

        Did you hear about the two guys who stole everything out of a house except the soap and towels. They were dirty crooks!  
    XW XW 46-50, M May 24, 2008

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    Stupid Joke #7

    Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?   A:  Because they have big fingers.   EEEWWWWW!!!!  <LOL>
    dyin2live dyin2live 31-35, F 6 Responses Feb 1, 2008

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    Me: do you know updog?

    Girlfriend: what's updog? Me: *starts laughing hysterically* Girlfriend: *facepalms*
    Dubstepdude25 Dubstepdude25 13-15, M 2 Responses Jun 20

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    One day mom was cleaning her son's room

    and under the bed, she found a bondage S+M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her with out a word. She finally asked him, "Well what should we do about this?" Dad...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Mar 23

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    Some guy at the bar turns to his friend

    and says: you are getting really fat!! His epic reply: yeah it's because every time I sleep with your wife she makes me a sandwich...
    wannahelpyou81 wannahelpyou81 31-35, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Stupid Joke # 10

    Why did Bob fall off the bike? Because Bob was an orange!
    ClearPier ClearPier 31-35, F 2 Responses Feb 12, 2008

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    Ok this is great what did the narwall say to

    the girls on the nude beach
    con7399 con7399 13-15, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    One day a guy decided to kill home self.

    Unable to decide the best way, he went to the library. After finding a how too book on suicide, he decided to read at home. At the checkout counter the librarian said he could not check that book out. She say once you read it your likely to not bring it back.
    Readytorun567 Readytorun567 26-30, M 2 Responses Mar 23

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    Related Experiences

    So funny haha cheesy jokes make my day :)
    MonsterRrR MonsterRrR 16-17, F Nov 3

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    Sometimes I'm so bad ... I don't cross all my 'I's or cross all my 'T's ... I really CAN believe its not butter ... jaywalk ... I fart in a crowded elevator ... I play hooky from...
    stupendusdude stupendusdude 46-50, M 4 days ago

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    I am a mathmation genious .... I can count to five if I remove one glove ... I can count to ten if I remove two gloves ... I can count to fiveteen if I remove two gloves and one...
    stupendusdude stupendusdude 46-50, M 2 days ago

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    What did the traffic light say to the car? Don't look, I'm changing!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Oct 27

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    What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Oct 28

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    What type of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Oct 30

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    Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? He had no body to go with him!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Oct 30

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    What do you call a deer with no eye? No idear!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 2 Responses Nov 6

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    Wife: "How would you describe me?"Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."Wife: "What does that mean?"Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."Wife...
    Ellainemaidess Ellainemaidess 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 7

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    A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He responds with, "No thanks, I'm traveling light."
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 13

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    Never trust an atom, they make up everything
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Nov 13

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    Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Nov 13

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    What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummi bear lol
    DorkyGuy90 DorkyGuy90 22-25, M Nov 13

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    Don't use straighteners! They're a waste of money. I've been using one for 3 weeks now and I'm still gay.
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 14

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    What did the envelope say to the stamp? Stick with me baby I'll take you places. 😜
    meekakitty meekakitty 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 16

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    I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 17