Irish Wife - Paddy is stopped by the cops, and gets really really loud and angry.
his wife says
"Ah you don't want to mind him, he's always like this when he has drink in him"
Stupid Joke #5 - Knock, knock
(are you ready for it???)
Adolph ball hit me in de mowf. Dat’s why I dawk dis way
Stupid Joke #11 - What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
Beer nuts are $4.50 per pound.
And deer nuts are under a buck
How many tickles does it take to get an octopus to laugh?
Stupid Jokes - Stupid jokes,Love 'em,So corny,You have to laugh,They nearly make you sick!
A Definition Of Irony - Doing crazy stunts in your friends wheelchair, and you cripple yourself.
What concert only cost 45 cents?
50 cents featuring Nickelback
So - So this guy who suffers from premature *********** comes out of nowhere...
Stupid Joke # 10 - Why did Bob fall off the bike?
Because Bob was an orange!
Stupid Joke #12 - Did you hear about the two guys who stole everything out of a house except the soap and towels. They were dirty crooks!
Stupid Joke #4 - Why do lions always eat raw meat?
Because they don't know how to cook! (Rimshot!)
Stupid Joke #2 - Okay, I'll jump in on this one... here goes:
How can you drop an egg four feet without breaking it?
...are you ready for the answer...
Stupid Joke #15 - One more lame joke!
Nurse: Doctor, there's an invisible man in the waiting room.
Doctor: Tell him that I...
Stupid Joke #14 - A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was named...
Two Monocles - Two monocles got married,
They made a spectacle of themselves.
Stupid Joke, #13 - Okay Ladies, maybe you won't think it is so stupid...... :-)
A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
· 'Mum', he...
Stupid Joke #6 - A horse walks into a bar, the bartender looks up and says, "Hey!"
The horse says, "Sure!"
They just get worse!
Stupid Joke #3 - Sally opened her refrigerator and found a rabbit inside.
Surprised, she asked the rabbit, "What are you doing in my refrigerator?"
Stupid Joke #1 - I do love stupid jokes, they always make me snicker.
A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Buddhist Monk walk into a bar,
The bartender looks up and says,
Stupid Joke #9 - How do you catch a squirrel?
You climb into a tree and act like a nut.
Stupid Joke #7 - Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
A: Because they have big fingers.
Chinese - "It's about time I told you an important thing," I said to my 15 year old son.
"What is it dad?" He asked.
"You were adopted," I murmured.
"That's impossible!" He...
Okay It's a Bit Rubbish..... - Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?
She couldn't control her pupils.
Well I did tell you it was rubbish.......
Silly But Funny - I'm writing this slowly,
Because i know you cant read very fast.
I was going to send you some money,
But I had the envelope sealed before I thought of it...
So I was watching the news today, cause... well.. Looney Tunes was over. Anyway the big story of the day was "woman arrested after firing shots through McDonald's drive-thru". So...
At a paternity trial, the blonde's lawyer asked, "On the night of July 16th last, at approximately 11:45 p.m., in the locale known generally as 'Lover's Lane' did the...
haha my joke of the day is
Q: what did one math book say to the other book
A: Boy, do I have problems
A blonde, brunette, and redhead are all on a building about to jump off. They all jump at the same time. Which one landed last?
The blonde because she asked for directions.
what is Long, hard and full of seamen ?
Do you realize what I am?
A blonde was telling her priest a Pollock joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don't you know I'm Polish?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," the blonde...
Blonde and Goldfish
A blonde had some goldfish and she did not know how to feed them. So she called her brunette friend, and she showed her how. Once they were done feeding them...
What's the difference between beef soup and pea soup??
Anyone can cut beef but nobody can pea soup
Who keeps calling here? The number is: 867-5309
A dumb blonde was standing in front of a soda machine outside of a local store.
After putting in sixty cents, a root beer pops out of the machine.
She set it on the ground, puts...
I want to be in love with a man who loves me for me, and someone who is in it for the long run and not just a fling. I want to fall in love wholeheartedly and know that I can...
Part 92... Wednesday 19/2
My excuse for not writing in so long ,I'm doing my best ,but I'm still on a vacation and you guys are writing to me personal messages about the next...
A substitute teacher was trying to make use of her psychology background. She began her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, please stand up."
Right away, Little...
I was born with a natural, life-long awe of girls, women, females, ladies. But particularly attractive women, meaning features that are proportionate, skin that's clear and glowing...
On the 10th of September 2013, a 34 year old man was killed in a car crash. He was my uncle. He had just had a baby who was 12 weeks old and he had another son at the age of 5, he...
One day in 1989, a young couple goes to the village fair.
While walking, the two lovers stop in front of a trailer.
On the poster they read :
IN FRONT OF YOUR AMAZED EYES Mr PETER...
Akpos works as a shop attendant in a grocery store. The shop sells fruits only in full basket. One day, a huge man came in and demanded to buy half basket of fruits. Akpos tried to...
Yo mama so stupid, I asked her what time it was, she looked at the sky then said, it's daytime!
To mama so stupid, she got pulled over for doing 130 MPH in a 65 MPH zone. When the cop asked her why was she driving so fast, she said she was only going to be driving for a half...
In the Desert.
Three men, Imra, Shah and Shiraj were wandering in a desert. They were very, very thirsty. Suddenly a magician appeared in front of them and said "Go down this...
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he's a maverick!
BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens...
IV-Truth, I'll miss every single one of you :'((I'm going to miss my high school life..Especially my senior year. I really have no idea that this is how it will turn out to be. And...
I'm a guy. I fall for girls who are much shorter than me, uglier, fatter, dumber, weaker, stronger, smarter, skinnier, prettier. I love them like a stupid dog likes people. I fall...
My first experience but not my last! :)
Uh-huh! I just finished my first internship as a RNA student!! It was my first time having real contact with patients. As students, we...
Yo mama so fat when she turns her body it's the next day.
Yo mama so fat Mount Everest wants to climb her.
I know it's an old jokes.. at least these 2 made me explode in laughter...
About a week ago, I put out an intention to the Universe to send me lots of clean jokes with riddles that I can share here at EP and I've been receiving them via email. Here's...
My high-school English teacher was well known for being a fair, but hard, grader. One day I received a B minus on a theme paper. In hopes of bettering my grade and in the spirit of...
Old Pilot Jokes and Quotes
Fighter Pilots are steely eyed, weapons systems managers who kill bad people and break things. However, they can also be very charming and personable...
I am not very good at remembering jokes but here are two I heard on a show last night.
What do you call 32 hillbillies in a room?
A full set of teeth. Lol
What's better than...