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I Love to Laugh

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 35,120 People

    Duck Hunters A woman brought a very limp duck

    into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." The distressed woman wailed...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 10 Responses Sep 30, 2014

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    FIFTY SHADES OF GREY ( FOR THE AGING LOL ) The

    missus bought a paperback down Shepton Mallet way, I had a look inside her bag. . . . T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey" Well I just left her to it, And at ten I went to bed. An hour later she appeared, The sight filled me with dread. In her left hand she held a rope, And in her right...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 11 Responses Feb 21

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    Bahahaha I'm sorry if this offends you

    but I think it's hilarious Enjoy your day lol
    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 4 Responses a week ago

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    NURSERY RHYMES – with a difference Mary had a

    little pig, She kept it fat and plastered; And when the price of pork went up, She shot the little bastard. Mary had a little lamb. Her father shot it dead. Now it goes to school with her, Between two chunks of bread. Jack and Jill went up the hill To have a little fun. Stupid...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 17 Responses Jan 4

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    IrisROE IrisROE 56-60, F 1 Response Apr 2

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    Earthlostangel Earthlostangel 46-50, F 2 Responses Apr 12

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    According to a new report,

    a certain private school in Chicago, IL was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12th-grade girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. Applying and wearing the lipstick was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 13 Responses Jan 23

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    Happy Easter to those

    that celebrate it.
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 1 Response Apr 3

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 2 days ago

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    Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a

    question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 20 Responses Nov 1, 2014

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 19 Responses Jan 12

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    A young couple decided to wed.

    As the big day approached, they grew apprehensive. Each had a problem they had never before shared with anyone, not even each other. The Groom-to-be, overcoming his fear, decided to ask his father for advice. "Father," he said, "I am deeply concerned about the success of my...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 10 Responses Feb 2

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 12 Responses Jan 5

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 11 Responses Jan 13

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    My mother-in -law is in town

    and she's a fanatical FOX News watcher...it's all that is on our television whenever she comes to visit. This time I took a stand. It was priceless watching her keep trying to view the channel and a dumb look on her face trying to understand why FOX News would be "restricted...
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 13 Responses Apr 17

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    I'm at Wendy's and it's

    so funny watching the Snow Birds try to figure out the Coca-Cola freestyle machine.
    greeneyz83 greeneyz83 31-35, F 6 Responses 6 days ago

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    Wife Texts Hubby Wife texts husband on a cold

    winters morning: "Windows frozen." Husband texts back: "Pour some lukewarm water over it." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really screwed up now."
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 7 Responses Apr 3

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    Anyone watch Bieber's roast last night?

    Some great jokes...personally thought the jokes at the expense of Snoop were the best. "Snoop you look like a retired WNBA player."
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 3 Responses Mar 31

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 13 Responses Jan 2

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    I heard this on the Last week tonight with John

    Oliver and laughed out loud. This show is great! "Isis, the ebola of people"
    rescueme99 rescueme99 41-45 1 Response Apr 12

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    A blonde driving a car became lost in a

    snowstorm. She didn't panic however, because she remembered what her dad had once told her. "If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, just wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it." Sure enough, pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 27 Responses Nov 17, 2014

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    Earthlostangel Earthlostangel 46-50, F 1 Response Apr 7

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    So I'm at Wal-mart buying a bag of dog food

    for the dogs. While in the check-out line, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT??? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog. "I'm starting the dog food diet again. I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 13 Responses Aug 1, 2014

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    I’m great at multitasking.

    I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
    HMC17 HMC17 13-15, M 2 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    Does anybody else get a super kick out of the

    show Undateable?! Omg! I love Danny & Justin & need people like them in my life! So excited too, cuz I get to see Danny (Chris D'Elia) this weekend!!!! Woot woot!
    saundra04 saundra04 26-30, F Apr 8

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    A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus on

    O Connell Street in Limerick City. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, So she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, The man burst out laughing, She...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 10 Responses Nov 28, 2014

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    IrisROE IrisROE 56-60, F Apr 2

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 15 Responses Jan 9

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    A Jewish daughter says to her mother,

    "I'm divorcing Nathan. All he wants is sex, sex and more sex. My vagina is now the size of a 50-cent piece, when it used to be the size of a 5-cent piece." Her mother says ….. "You're married to a multi-millionaire businessman! You live in an 8 bedroom mansion! You drive a $25...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 26 Responses Jan 21

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I am exactly like this lol .

    Im considered a joker in my own group of misfits lol
    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    This Woman Was Taking Too Long,

    So The Man Behind Her Decided To Do THIS As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 10 Responses Jan 16

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    LOL..Now you know the whole story.

    .. :P When God created Adam and Eve, He said: I only have two gifts: One is the art of peeing standing ... And then Adam stepped forward and shouted: ME!, ME!, ME!, I would love it please ... Lord, please, please! Look, it will make my life substantially easier. Eve nodded, and...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 16 Responses Jan 18

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    Check out this video

    if you're like me and you love laughing. I couldn't help it...but I sure felt for the little guy, poor baby. http://youtu.be/D53Pw2Y_fU4
    MsInvis MsInvis 46-50, F Apr 8

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    Woman Accuses Walmart Clerk Of Overcharging Her

    Then This Happens A lady goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel. She is not sure which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the register. There is a Wal-Mart clerk standing there with dark shades on. She says, “Excuse me sir…can you tell me anything about...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 7 Responses Jan 19

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    Why English Teachers Retire Early

    WHY ENGLISH TEACHERS RETIRE EARLY The following similes and metaphors were committed by high school students.    1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.   2. His thoughts tumbled in his head...
    RomanticRunner RomanticRunner 46-50, T 17 Responses Nov 27, 2009

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    Did you ever wonder why earrings became

    so popular with men ? A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. The man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense" The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 2 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 1 Response a week ago

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    A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the

    shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the sidewalk, and stopped centimeters from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, “Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 4 Responses Apr 10

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    LOL...A husband went to the sheriff’s

    department to report that his wife was missing. Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home. Sergeant: What is her height? Husband: Gee, I’m not sure. A little over five-feet tall. Sergeant: Weight? Husband: Don’t know. Not slim, not...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 16 Responses Jan 10

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    Accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty

    stomach and now I'm the proud owner of aisle 7.
    AwesomeAlert AwesomeAlert 46-50, M 11 Responses Mar 28

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    LOL..Well, Duh!!! As a trucker stops at a red

    light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says "Hi, my name is Heather and you're losing some of your load." The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. When the truck...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 15 Responses Jan 19

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    Rectum Stretcher While she was ‘flying’

    down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, ‘What’s your hurry?’ To which she...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 11 Responses Jan 17

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    Two Blokes and the Barber: Tim Matheson,

    the First Bloke and Tony Abbott somehow ended up at the same barber shop. As they sat there, each being worked on by a different barber, not a word was spoken. The barbers were both afraid to start a conversation, for fear it would turn to politics. As the barbers finished...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 4 Responses Apr 14

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