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I Love to Laugh

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 35,265 People

    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M Apr 19

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 12 Responses Jan 2

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    According to a new report,

    a certain private school in Chicago, IL was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12th-grade girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. Applying and wearing the lipstick was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 13 Responses Jan 23

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    FIFTY SHADES OF GREY ( FOR THE AGING LOL ) The

    missus bought a paperback down Shepton Mallet way, I had a look inside her bag. . . . T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey" Well I just left her to it, And at ten I went to bed. An hour later she appeared, The sight filled me with dread. In her left hand she held a rope, And in her right...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 11 Responses Feb 21

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 14 Responses Jan 9

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    By complete chance, Mr Walker

    and Mr Bell arrive at the remote Scottish kirk an hour too early for the funeral of their mutual acquaintance. Both men have been bitter competitors within the Scottish whisky industry for many years, but on such an occasion, they recognise it would be inappropriate not to be...
    treborsniknej treborsniknej 56-60, M 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    LOL..Now you know the whole story.

    .. :P When God created Adam and Eve, He said: I only have two gifts: One is the art of peeing standing ... And then Adam stepped forward and shouted: ME!, ME!, ME!, I would love it please ... Lord, please, please! Look, it will make my life substantially easier. Eve nodded, and...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 16 Responses Jan 18

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    BORN TO RUN - Parody - Bruce Springteen

    and Jimmy Fallon skit on Gov Chris Christie "Traffic Jam"
    Love2014nb Love2014nb 51-55, F 17 hrs ago

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    There are two types of human beings found on

    Facebook. One who gets an enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts. And the others are men... I hate to say it... But it's true
    HMC17 HMC17 13-15, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    NURSERY RHYMES – with a difference Mary had a

    little pig, She kept it fat and plastered; And when the price of pork went up, She shot the little bastard. Mary had a little lamb. Her father shot it dead. Now it goes to school with her, Between two chunks of bread. Jack and Jill went up the hill To have a little fun. Stupid...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 17 Responses Jan 4

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 10 Responses Jan 20

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    Did you ever wonder why earrings became

    so popular with men ? A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. The man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense" The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 2 Responses Apr 25

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M Apr 23

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    A young couple decided to wed.

    As the big day approached, they grew apprehensive. Each had a problem they had never before shared with anyone, not even each other. The Groom-to-be, overcoming his fear, decided to ask his father for advice. "Father," he said, "I am deeply concerned about the success of my...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 10 Responses Feb 2

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    A Jewish daughter says to her mother,

    "I'm divorcing Nathan. All he wants is sex, sex and more sex. My vagina is now the size of a 50-cent piece, when it used to be the size of a 5-cent piece." Her mother says ….. "You're married to a multi-millionaire businessman! You live in an 8 bedroom mansion! You drive a $25...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 26 Responses Jan 21

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 2 Responses Apr 24

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 11 Responses Jan 13

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    The Irish working for Telstra: TELSTRA needed

    to hire a team of telephone pole installers for the Stuart Highway, and McMurray and the boss had to choose between a team of two guys from Port Pirie and a team of two Irish guys. So the boss met both teams and said "Here's what we'll do. Each team will be installing poles out...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 1 Response Apr 23

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 12 Responses Nov 29, 2014

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    A piece of black tarmacadam walk into a bar

    and says "I'm the toughest one here!" No one disagrees and the bar noise resumes. Ten minutes later, a piece of red tarmacadam walks into the same bar and says "I'm the toughest one here!" No one disagrees, but the barman whispers to the piece of black tarmacadam "I thought you...
    treborsniknej treborsniknej 56-60, M 1 Response 17 hrs ago

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    I’m great at multitasking.

    I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
    HMC17 HMC17 13-15, M 4 Responses Apr 25

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    My mother-in -law is in town

    and she's a fanatical FOX News watcher...it's all that is on our television whenever she comes to visit. This time I took a stand. It was priceless watching her keep trying to view the channel and a dumb look on her face trying to understand why FOX News would be "restricted...
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 12 Responses Apr 17

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    I am exactly like this lol .

    Im considered a joker in my own group of misfits lol
    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 2 Responses Apr 20

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    Here is old age at its best.

    Larry and Bob, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Larry didn't show up. Bob didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something.. But after Larry hadn't shown up for a week...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 1 Response Apr 27

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 11 Responses Jan 5

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    Accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty

    stomach and now I'm the proud owner of aisle 7.
    AwesomeAlert AwesomeAlert 46-50, M 11 Responses Mar 28

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    Dave & Nadine are at the airport in Phoenix,

    awaiting their flight. They are dressed in heavy boots, parka, scarf, mittens, all ready to head home to the Canadian winter. An old American couple standing nearby in shorts are intrigued by their manner of dress. The wife says to her husband, "Look at that couple. I wonder...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 5 Responses Apr 25

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    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 19 Responses Jan 12

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    Anytime an EP friend starts a story with "Well,

    my husband went over to the Tractor Supply store to pick up a surprise today..." I know that it's going to be a damn good story!
    BBWand40 BBWand40 41-45, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    Gorilla My Dreams -  The best part starts

    when he takes BB for a walk....
    Love2014nb Love2014nb 51-55, F 1 day ago

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    Rectum Stretcher While she was ‘flying’

    down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, ‘What’s your hurry?’ To which she...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 11 Responses Jan 17

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    Q: If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey,

    what would Delaware? A: Idaho... Alaska! One of my favourites haha
    HMC17 HMC17 13-15, M 5 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    It was a dark night, I could see nothing,

    everything was deathly quiet then I heard him enter the room. He was Shuttle and so gentle, before I knew it he had taken his fill of me and entered me. He left me when he was done. Bloody mosquito
    avachat avachat 51-55, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Prepare for trouble Make it double.

    . lolz anyone gonna help me out with the rest?? xD
    Tripp93 Tripp93 18-21, M a week ago

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    Somebody just sent me this message.

    Thank you for cheering me up, buddy! lol
    Daniel0018 Daniel0018 22-25, M 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    Love2014nb Love2014nb 51-55, F 17 hrs ago

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    So I'm at Wal-mart buying a bag of dog food

    for the dogs. While in the check-out line, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT??? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog. "I'm starting the dog food diet again. I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 13 Responses Aug 1, 2014

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    HammerD08 HammerD08 31-35, M 1 Response Apr 22

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    Well, he asked for it.

    LOLOL ... love the Looney's. Enjoy ;)  
    deleted deleted 26-30 15 Responses Dec 13, 2014

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    A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the

    shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the sidewalk, and stopped centimeters from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, “Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 4 Responses Apr 10

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    Woman Accuses Walmart Clerk Of Overcharging Her

    Then This Happens A lady goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel. She is not sure which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the register. There is a Wal-Mart clerk standing there with dark shades on. She says, “Excuse me sir…can you tell me anything about...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 7 Responses Jan 19

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    This Woman Was Taking Too Long,

    So The Man Behind Her Decided To Do THIS As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 9 Responses Jan 16

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    The kind if laughing

    that makes your abs hurt. The silent kind too . You just feel so good after it all .
    Lvictoria101 Lvictoria101 22-25, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    WHILE ON A ROAD TRIP,

    AN ELDERLY COUPLE, STOPPED AT A PIZZA HUT FOR LUNCH. AFTER FINISHING THEIR MEAL, THEY LEFT THE RESTAURANT, AND RESUMED THEIR TRIP TO PHOENIX. WHEN LEAVING, THE ELDERLY WOMAN UNKNOWINGLY LEFT HER GLASSES ON THE TABLE, AND SHE DIDN'T MISS THEM UNTIL THEY HAD BEEN DRIVING FOR...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F Apr 28

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    A DEA Agent stopped at a ranch in Texas

    and talked to an old rancher. He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher said, "okay, but don't go into that field over there...", as he pointed out the location. The DEA Agent verbally exploded and said, "look mister, I have the...
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    Wife Texts Hubby Wife texts husband on a cold

    winters morning: "Windows frozen." Husband texts back: "Pour some lukewarm water over it." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really screwed up now."
    VanTraveller VanTraveller 51-55, F 6 Responses Apr 3

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    A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus on

    O Connell Street in Limerick City. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, So she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, The man burst out laughing, She...
    vickieprince vickieprince 51-55, F 10 Responses