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I Love to Make Jokes About Everything

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 95 People

    Funny Story

    T he other day my friend was singing the song "Do you know the muffin man the muffin man, do you know the muffin man, who lives on drooly lane!" I felt upset by his singing, so he asks what's wrong. So I go to tell him what happened to me last night. I have been...
    Dust329 Dust329 16-17, M 1 Response Sep 6, 2009

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    Some People Say I'm Funny

    But, I feel I need to learn timing and other things that complete a comedian.  Maybe comic school would help?
    moxiesurvivor moxiesurvivor 66-70, F 2 Responses Jun 7, 2007

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    Chuck Norris is the only man

    who can get a sandwich from a feminist >_>
    TouchesClouds TouchesClouds 36-40, M 2 Responses Oct 26

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    I Love to Make Jokes About Everything

    When I was 49 years old I fell off the roof of a three story building breaking 15 bones and had little chance to live but in my pain and agony I made jokes about it and about dying because I figured if I was going to die I was going out laughing. I was wheelchair bound for over a...
    le7m2d6 le7m2d6 70+, M 7 Responses Mar 2, 2007

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    Related Experiences

    I hate people who ALWAYS try to make jokes… which ARENT funny as well… it just bores me… I'm SO unimpressed. Why aren't people respectful and talk to you normally nowadays...
    Misscoconut Misscoconut 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 14

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    Having been laughed at BC people think I have Ebola I don't want to hear it again and who ever does say jokes about it... Then I hope you get Ebola
    jopage45wassup jopage45wassup 13-15, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    Isn't that what everything's there for? lol The greatest frustration is longing for answers you know you can never have. I was wondering about some mundane thing last night, just...
    niklb niklb 41-45, F 6 days ago

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    I love to dream about a world where everything is completely free. But of course we have limits to what we can get. There is no pollution and instead of cutting down trees, we...
    Guppy3113 Guppy3113 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 7

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    I've loved makeup, ever since I was about 12-13. I started out with eyeliner/mascara, moving into high school if tried out brows and lipgloss. Now here I am. Top is about 3-4 years...
    endofalldays endofalldays 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 9

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    Lol I absolutely love makeup especially being creative eye shadow blush foundation eyeliner lip gloss lip stick lip stain ect love it all. Lol my first experience when I was a...
    SexyLexie88 SexyLexie88 26-30, T Nov 18

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    What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Oct 28

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    Never trust an atom, they make up everything
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Nov 13

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    So funny haha cheesy jokes make my day :)
    MonsterRrR MonsterRrR 16-17, F Nov 3

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    Someone please spam me with laugh out loud jokes! In that kind of mood 😂
    kittyAloha kittyAloha 18-21, F 7 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    Some guy at the bar turns to his friend and says: you are getting really fat!! His epic reply: yeah it's because every time I sleep with your wife she makes me a sandwich...
    wannahelpyou81 wannahelpyou81 31-35, M 17 hrs ago

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    Wife: "How would you describe me?"Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."Wife: "What does that mean?"Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."Wife...
    Ellainemaidess Ellainemaidess 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 7

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    I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 17

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    I love hearing about it, reading about it, writing about it. Sex and everything about sex is amazing. It makes me wet just thinking about it. I'm a sex addict, I can never get...
    YoungForeverr YoungForeverr 22-25, F a week ago

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    All my friends say I never stop day dreaming! Well that's mainly because inside my head is a whole lot better than the real world! :( It's never upset me before... but I guess I'm...
    lizzie2001x lizzie2001x 13-15, F Nov 8

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    I strongly dislike people(their attitude basically.) that love to argue, I have a "short temper" (along those lines.) type of ADHD and makes me extremely angry when people insist...
    AlwaysAnonnymous AlwaysAnonnymous 13-15, M Oct 27

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    When lonesome seems a fever dream. Know misplaced doubt is not what it seems. Tread lightly on me for any pended smiles. I daybreak to a sunset from your faraway isle. My mind far...
    GivaCafeMatin GivaCafeMatin 56-60, M Oct 31

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    It's my escape from reality. When I need a break from all the stress and problems I just daydream about anything I feel like.
    PieBombs PieBombs 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 5

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    One of the things that I love about my love is that he knew how to make me laugh and making me happy.
    roselani2005 roselani2005 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    I love taking pictures. Photo hold memories.
    mstv1112 mstv1112 13-15, F Nov 14

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    I'm a bit of tomboy (I like to be girly sometimes) and I can do my makeup very well I just don't like applying it on everyday. And everyone always ask me who does it when i wear...
    glittercutie glittercutie 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 9

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    There is just something so absolutely so delicious about trying new looks. Every time I pop open my kit and let the brushes do the work I gain a little more pep in my step.
    Sparrowlynn03 Sparrowlynn03 26-30, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I don't always sneeze when I'm doing my make up but when I do it's right after I've applied my mascara FML haha
    Snnowflake Snnowflake 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 7

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    if I have to do my makeup everyday I would have to get up a hour early...which out of the questions cause I'm a lazy morning type of person
    glittercutie glittercutie 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 9

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    Yea I do love it I buy a lot of clothes but can't seem to style myself beautifully the way I see other women. I'm so lazy that all I do is get up put on sweats and exercise clothes...
    alostone alostone 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 7

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    I recently discovered this amazing product called lip enhancer! I personally bought it to try it out and loved it! No injections or lip gloss! I mean the picture shows the results...
    Pawes Pawes 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 16

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    I have a secret wish dwelling in my mind being lost and sharing with you a starry night... I'd love to be in your arms not knowing where we are not having any intention of...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F 3 Responses Oct 31

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    I love hearing peoples fantasies, turn on/turn offs 😛
    PB793 PB793 16-17, F 2 Responses Nov 15

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    I tend to dream of a world that I can just escape too, viewing a different reality than what I see everyday. Sometimes I tend to just look out the window or just sit there in...
    Thelogicinme2 Thelogicinme2 18-21, M Nov 17

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    I love reading dirty messages but can't ever write them
    ngardner621 ngardner621 22-25, F 3 days ago

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    Just uhhhhh just gunna go now.... Yep
    AlwaysAnonnymous AlwaysAnonnymous 13-15, M 4 days ago

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    What did the traffic light say to the car? Don't look, I'm changing!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Oct 27

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    What type of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Oct 30

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    Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? He had no body to go with him!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Oct 30

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    What do you call a deer with no eye? No idear!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 2 Responses Nov 6

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    A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He responds with, "No thanks, I'm traveling light."
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 13

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    Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans!
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Nov 13

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    What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummi bear lol
    DorkyGuy90 DorkyGuy90 22-25, M Nov 13

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    Don't use straighteners! They're a waste of money. I've been using one for 3 weeks now and I'm still gay.
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 14

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    What did the envelope say to the stamp? Stick with me baby I'll take you places. 😜
    meekakitty meekakitty 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 16

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    There once was a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils
    msilver msilver 16-17, F Nov 17

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    A dad walks in on his son ************ and says "son if you keep doing that you'll go blind", to which the son replies "dad I'm over here"
    MarxistLuciferKongJr MarxistLuciferKongJr 22-25, M Nov 17