Having been laughed at BC people think I have Ebola I don't want to hear it again and who ever does say jokes about it... Then I hope you get Ebola
Isn't that what everything's there for? lol The greatest frustration is longing for answers you know you can never have.
I was wondering about some mundane thing last night, just...
First: There may be writing mistakes, so don't judge pls :(
It began in April 2014, nothing special, thats what i thought.
A good friend of mine was celebrating her birthday in...
Lol I absolutely love makeup especially being creative eye shadow blush foundation eyeliner lip gloss lip stick lip stain ect love it all.
Lol my first experience when I was a...
I love makeup. I feel as if it's the only way I can actually express myself artistically. I'm not very good with drawing, painting, or sculpting, but hand me a makeup brush and I'm...
Someone please spam me with laugh out loud jokes! In that kind of mood 😂
Some guy at the bar turns to his friend and says: you are getting really fat!!
His epic reply: yeah it's because every time I sleep with your wife she makes me a sandwich...
Why didn't the toilet paper roll make it across the street?
Because it got stuck in a crack!
Want to hear a pizza joke…. nah, it’s too cheesy. What about a construction joke? Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one. Did you hear the one about the...
How do you make a handkerchief dance?
I love hearing about it, reading about it, writing about it. Sex and everything about sex is amazing. It makes me wet just thinking about it. I'm a sex addict, I can never get...
I was in church and the preast was giving a sermon about alcohol how bad it is for you .and to prove it he put a worm in a glass of water and one in to a glass of whiskey after a...
I have a bumper sticker that says, "honk if you think I'm sexy"...
Now, I just sit at green lights until I feel good about myself.
my 4 year old came up with this one ...
why did Darth Vader cross the road??
to get to the dark side lol
i love it!
I am usually very shy, reserved, "cold", and "dry" when I'm around others that I'm not too comfortable or familiar with. Or even with some people I know, I tend to hold back my...
One of the things that I love about my love is that he knew how to make me laugh and making me happy.
So I tried using more make up than usual today and I sadly love it! I feel like taking if off made me more self conscious and I feel like that's exactly what make up does. Makes...
*My mom is really good with makeup. The picture attached here is her work of Smokey Eyes.*
Makeup is something I wear only on special occasions, but I do love it nonetheless. I...
There is just something so absolutely so delicious about trying new looks. Every time I pop open my kit and let the brushes do the work I gain a little more pep in my step.
I'm struggling with one right now. I am out on my way shopping and the bus is stuck in traffic and its raining anyone want to make me struggle more? ;)
I feel comfortable without make-up, but I love putting make up for so many other reasons! It's the beauty of being a girl
I don't like to let on about this fantasy because the idea of it always seems to frustrate any boyfriend I've had.
I often have this thing about wanting to feel like an escort...
I love reading dirty messages but can't ever write them
So many people today are side stepping the "Sexual Taboo's" in life.. We should be a more open society in communication about topics. :)
Just uhhhhh just gunna go now.... Yep
What did the Pacific Ocean say to the Arctic Ocean?
Ok this is great what did the narwall say to the girls on the nude beach
Lady: Im s3xually harassed at office!
Friend: What happened?
Lady: A Man keeps saying your hair smells nice.
Friend: So whats wrong in that?
Lady: He’s only 3 feet tall!! Lolz.
Student: "is it ever ok to get in trouble for something u didn't do?"
Teacher: "no, its not okay"
Student: "okay, I didn't do my homework"
What is a mouses weapon of choice?
I went to the bar tonight and ended up piercing a girl's nipple for her.
I'm really bad at darts.
How do you get holy water?
You boil the hell out of it!
I tried to catch some fog.
My baby sister told me this one.
You want to hear a farm joke !?!?
Never mind, it corny.
What's brown and sticky?
2 muffins are baking in the oven.
the first one says "wow it's really getting hot in here" the second one says "I can't believe it a talking muffin!"
what is blue and smells like red paint?
what looks and smells JUST like a half an apple?
a half an apple
don't be one just eat one? one what?
A chicken lolol
Star Wars factoid: Back in college, he worked in the Imperial Pub, and was known as Darth Waiter.
Q: How does a blonde try to kill a worm?
A: Bury it alive!