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I Love to Make Jokes About Everything

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 106 People

    I Love to Make Jokes About Everything

    When I was 49 years old I fell off the roof of a three story building breaking 15 bones and had little chance to live but in my pain and agony I made jokes about it and about dying because I figured if I was going to die I was going out laughing. I was wheelchair bound for over a...
    le7m2d6 le7m2d6 66-70, M 8 Responses Mar 2, 2007

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    Funny Story

    T he other day my friend was singing the song "Do you know the muffin man the muffin man, do you know the muffin man, who lives on drooly lane!" I felt upset by his singing, so he asks what's wrong. So I go to tell him what happened to me last night. I have been...
    Dust329 Dust329 16-17, M 1 Response Sep 6, 2009

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    Chuck Norris is the only man

    who can get a sandwich from a feminist >_>
    TouchesClouds TouchesClouds 36-40, M 2 Responses Oct 26, 2014

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    Some People Say I'm Funny

    But, I feel I need to learn timing and other things that complete a comedian.  Maybe comic school would help?
    moxiesurvivor moxiesurvivor 66-70, F 2 Responses Jun 7, 2007

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    Related Experiences

    I am always daydreaming about different places and people that are so amazing. I get miss important things in class sometimes... Whoops. I try to focus, but I zone out so bad and...
    Megaleg6 Megaleg6 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 16

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    I love makeup. Period. Life without makeup (for me) is like life without air; just not possible. I love to experiment with my looks, what colors go with what, how pale I can make...
    sunatdawn214 sunatdawn214 18-21, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I've loved makeup for a long time, but never had the chance to go to school for cosmetology. So i sold avon and mary kay and failed miserable....MISERABLY. I slowly became a self...
    youniqueviatia youniqueviatia 31-35, F Apr 5

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    I love makeup :DD I put makeup on to express myself and to be creative, I do a lot of dramatic makeup or sometimes I can use eyeshadow or just eyeliner
    bloodyzombie19 bloodyzombie19 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 29

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    I love makeup too! One time I had a makeup malfunction. I was performing a dance and only had time to apply makeup to one eye.
    heyheynatalie heyheynatalie 18-21, F Apr 7

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    Are there any makeup groups I can join? I'm a nice person honest & I totally love makeup
    mazzaah mazzaah 13-15, F 6 days ago

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    Well I love makeup, but today I'm feeling like being myself 😊🙈 I can't believe that I'm posting a free makeup selfie, so don't be too harsh on me 😅
    Mjcabello Mjcabello 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I love to talk about sex with women, like a tease, not hoping for something to happen but just to fantasize. it's a turn on and my secret hope is that's the same for the woman I...
    matt769 matt769 31-35, M 1 Response Apr 16

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    Is that your horse? The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, "Who owns the big...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Apr 9

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    They're always far funnier than normal jokes 🙈😂
    Listentotherain123 Listentotherain123 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 1

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    You gotta love little johnny jokes !!! Teacher: If I gave you 2 rabbits , and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have? Johnny: Seven Sir Teacher: No, listen...
    AcousticAnne1 AcousticAnne1 26-30, F 2 Responses Apr 2

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    I must be an egg cuz all these jokes are cracking me up! ;D
    mclovin31321 mclovin31321 22-25, F Apr 5

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    Clarinet jokes Q: What's the definition of a nerd? A: Someone who has his or her own alto clarinet. Q: Why do clarinetists leave their cases on the dashboard? A: So they...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Apr 6

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    After serving 18 months of a 25-year sentence, a man escaped from prison. His escape was the lead story on the early evening TV news and knowing that there would be a huge search...
    hancockian hancockian 66-70, M Apr 13

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    Smart snake breeder There once was a snake breeder who had two snakes he was trying to mate. For the life of him, he couldn't get them within two feet of each other. Frustrated...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Apr 11

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    "They're ******* with my emotions, and I don't know how I feel about that."
    BadCatholic BadCatholic 13-15, F 2 Responses Apr 1

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    Love this lol when that guy that hits on you and he complements your butt lol
    bizzaregirl bizzaregirl 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 4

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    Haha I love this. What do u think?
    Juri0902 Juri0902 31-35, F 12 Responses Apr 10

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    Here's a tip MM and OW A woman began an affair shortly after celebrating her fifth wedding anniversary. Her best friend asked her how she handled the calls from lover boy on...
    hancockian hancockian 66-70, M 3 Responses Apr 15

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    With this new beer league I joined, I'm the "high guy that says random ****, but it's okay because it's funny" which makes me laugh even more because half of the guys have never...
    PuckDrop PuckDrop 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 12

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    I'm not feeling as overwhelmed anymore. Just alot of thoughts. I have the tendancy to analyse and overthink everything. I said that this year felt a bit different. And the year...
    HigherCalling HigherCalling 26-30, F Apr 13

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    I always receive make up and clothes as gifts. Always a woman's joy... "Smiles"
    lemongrass09 lemongrass09 46-50, F 1 Response Mar 28

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    when i wear makeup i feel powerful :)
    kandiikisses248 kandiikisses248 18-21, F 4 Responses Apr 3

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    makeup is one of my best friends
    maemae208 maemae208 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 9

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    Recently I've decided I wanted to Persue what I want to do and believe in regardless of how I will be successful- this was like 3 days ago so I honestly have no idea if it will...
    mazzaah mazzaah 13-15, F 6 days ago

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    I love talking about sex. I could do it all night. What I don't like is overly graphic ****, where the woman is constantly yelling obscenities at the top of lungs throughout the...
    Joei005 Joei005 46-50, M 1 Response Apr 3

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    Yeeeaaahhh, I love my stuff but I'm quite lazy in the cleaning my face after I've some ideas. -.- I barely practice but there really are a lot of tricks I wanna try! and the...
    abcdefghisabelmnopqrst abcdefghisabelmnopqrst 26-30, F 3 Responses Apr 9

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    I'm so in love with macs studio fix liquid foundation. I went through 3 bottles last year. But it's worth it.
    Mixedgoddess Mixedgoddess 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 9

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    My passion is for fiction law and crime books, especially J. D. Robb's Death Series. I also like John Sanford's characters Lucas Davenport and Virgil Flowers. If you like humor...
    Danielle1011 Danielle1011 51-55, F 2 Responses Apr 9

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    On my wattpad(wattpad.com/user/majikal_muzik) I have my own theory about this thing called the GWS. It's my world where all my friends and I live in happiness and I have my own...
    lunarsolar36 lunarsolar36 13-15, T Mar 27

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    I love imagining my own worlds, its awesome
    YoniKollin YoniKollin 13-15, M Apr 6

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    Ponder how deep of talk a lady would like talk about sex
    WyoDoug WyoDoug 46-50, M 4 days ago

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    A feminist joke: why does a woman need a man???? Cause a vibrator cannot cut the grass
    VeniceTheMenice VeniceTheMenice 31-35, F 4 Responses Mar 27

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    Q: What does it take to become a zombie? A: DEADication!
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Mar 29

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    Pic......................!!!!!!!!!! Huh?
    VeniceTheMenice VeniceTheMenice 31-35, F Mar 30

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    me and my Bestie are the greatest at this!
    CallmeHopelessNotRomantic CallmeHopelessNotRomantic 36-40, F 1 Response Apr 1

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    You can tell how attractive a women is by what heels she can handle, the thicker and shorter her max is, the thicker and shorter the guys she can get are.
    Jessicaliners Jessicaliners 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 1

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