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I Make Inappropriate Jokes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 148 People

    Jokes

    Have you seen Amy Winehouse lately? See looks like a campaign poster for abandoned horses Why did Hitler really die? He saw the gas bill
    Daveokay Daveokay 22-25, M Dec 12, 2010

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    Hey Baby

    how do you like your eggs   scrambled or fertilized
    theluckyduck theluckyduck 26-30, M 8 Responses Nov 7, 2008

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    LOL

    An ******* went to the store to buy cheese.  He was just browering through  cheese when the ******* noticed a big round cheese. He pick it up and put into his ***-hole. LOL....
    mother1983 mother1983 31-35, F 2 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    In assembly the other day,

    this kid was pulled up in front of the school for telling a really dark joke and was made to tell everyone what he said. The entire hall was in silence and I just let out the loudest laugh ever, I couldn't help myself. I know I shouldn't have laughed, it's a serious subject. I...
    AliceRigby AliceRigby 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 12, 2014

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    Hate It

    I hate upsetting people ...it's just a talent I have.
    HerrDoctorLiebenstrudl HerrDoctorLiebenstrudl 61-65, M 2 Responses Jun 24, 2011

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    I Just Don't Get The Snape Lust

    ...no offense, and I think Alan Rickman is very sexy... in 1988.
    Chrisanna Chrisanna 36-40, F 1 Response Jul 25, 2011

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    This is coming from Lydi- "Mom,

    what's easier to unload off of trucks?" Babies or Bricks Me- "Babies" Lydi-"Do you know why?" I'm not even going to attempt this, I'm over here thinking slicing and dicing, but I don't wanna be wrong. "Why Lydia?" Lydi- "Babies because you use pitchforks" "WHAT" and this...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Dec 23, 2014

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    Cocaine? Or Bulimia? Decisions.. Decisions....

    I am known for being inappropriate. The way my mother describes me is someone that "has no shame." Yes, that is right, I do have no shame. haha It's probably something I get from my father, oh yes, definitely so. Like for example, One time someone came up to me and...
    InsanelyMe08 InsanelyMe08 18-21, F 7 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    Makes It Easier.

     I do this all the time, I find things are easier to deal with when you can laugh at them. Recently I have been merrily freaking people out by making self deprecating jokes about my depression. Hey, I’m medicated what’s your excuse??   A few...
    deleted deleted 26-30 14 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    ._______.

    I did it the other day at the supermarket actually. I saw a jar of pickles labled "Sweet Midgets" and I said to my mom "Look, they have sweet midgets, and I don't mean really cool dwarves." I also made a few probably off-color jokes while watching Twilight...
    axelval axelval 18-21, T 5 Responses Dec 1, 2008

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    My Wife Gets Really Uncomfortable Around Deaf People Who Speak

    So one day we were out eating, and this table of deaf people were talking to each other in that odd way that deaf people do. She gets really uncomfortable around them, so I decided that since they couldn't hear me, that I would imitate them to make her laugh. What I failed to...
    Robf911 Robf911 36-40, M Oct 22, 2010

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    Inappropriate?

    Ok, here's the thing.  I don't usually realize that the jokes are inappropriate at the time.
    RagingSkillet RagingSkillet 31-35, M Jan 10, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    when I was 14 my older sister would when our parents weren't home dress me up as her little sister. She would get a wig and put it on me, and pick out a really girly outfit. I...
    Sexyrachel1406 Sexyrachel1406 22-25, M 2 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    There have been times where a chuckle was totally inappropriate, and I couldn't help myself. I was in an equal opportunity and treatment class, and the first thing the teacher...
    TW8NY TW8NY 41-45, M 1 Response 13 hrs ago

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    Every single movie I've watched the same thing happens. If it's a drama then I'm laughing at the most inappropriate times ever. Every time someone tells me about a very bad moment...
    crazyellie crazyellie 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Santa is a Woman I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he's a she. Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Hey ... me again next rule ... we all have "Blonde" jokes ... Irish jokes ... jokes of different "shades ?" 😨 FEK , I'm going to offend someone soon ... hey can we...
    shaggynz shaggynz 41-45, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    A sick woman was lying on her sick bed with her husband by her side, She turns to the husband and said WIFE : Honey, I have a confession to make.... HUSBAND : Save your strength my...
    Rosalindaag Rosalindaag 18-21, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealers showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he...
    Rosalindaag Rosalindaag 18-21, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    A man and his blonde wife are sitting inside, by the fire, when the radio announcer comes on: "We are expecting up to a foot of snow tonight, please make sure you are parked on the...
    lovingCuteSmartGirl lovingCuteSmartGirl 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    John was feeling guilty, so he went to church for a confession. John: Forgive me Father, I have sinned. I stole some wood from a construction site. The priest: Well what did you do...
    lovingCuteSmartGirl lovingCuteSmartGirl 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    A man is driving his five year old to a friend’s house when another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing an accident. "Douchebag!" the father yells. A moment...
    lovingCuteSmartGirl lovingCuteSmartGirl 18-21, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    two drunk guys one says to the other make us some tea and the other one replies we need sugar go out and ask neighbours for some. the guy goes out but can't find anyone and he...
    Mindlha Mindlha 22-25, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    What's a Quark? The noise a posh duck makes.
    Heideggerclone Heideggerclone 22-25, F 6 days ago

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    Just gimme a message if you're genuinely interested in being friends (no creeps or inappropriate messages please :) )
    CiorstaidhNicAnToisich CiorstaidhNicAnToisich 18-21, F 1 Response a week ago

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    It offends me because my sibling was raped and on top of that, he has special needs. Which adds more to my anger because some people i know make fun of peers who have special needs...
    celeryandcarrots celeryandcarrots 16-17, F Jul 19

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    like after abdominal surgery. I have to use the loo. I just realise it's freezing in the and pick up the warmest garment in reach: dad's fleece. I say dad can I borrow this a...
    cloudsoflife cloudsoflife 26-30, M 1 Response Jul 19

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    A lawyer was cross-examining the doctor about whether or not he had checked the pulse of the deceased before he signed the death certificate. "No," the doctor said. "I did not...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 4 Responses Jul 18

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    1. Thunderstorms because the sound of thunder is so relaxing as well as seeing lightning. 2. Animals that won't injure/harm me in a purposeful way because animals are all together...
    QuietlyLurking16 QuietlyLurking16 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 18

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    Cookie Monster A woman went into a restaurant for lunch, and noticed that the kitchen had a big window in front of it so that people can watch the chef prepare the food. As she...
    BadPam BadPam 56-60, F 4 Responses Jul 16

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    Make me laugh 😡 Pwease 😥😅
    maybelle001 maybelle001 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 15

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    What did the DNA of the fat one say to the DNA of the slim one? “Do these genes make me look fat?”
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jul 15

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    ARE YOU READY? Puns 1. King Ozymandias of Assyria was running low on cash after years of war with the Hittites. His last great possession was the Star of the Euphrates, the most...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 1 Response Jul 14

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    Chuck Norris can make a Diet Coke/Mentos explosion without the Mentos...or the Diet Coke.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Jul 13

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    What Is Politics? A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 12

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    Your mom is so fat She asked me to make her thin.... BUT IT WAS FAR BEYOND MY POWER Eternal Dragon DBZ
    bioshock22 bioshock22 31-35, F Jul 12

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    Cinderella is now 95 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now dead prince, she happily sits upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 5 Responses Jul 11

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    “I’m not sexist – I’m not! That’s why I let my female workers work longer than the men so they can make the same money.”
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 11

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    A man died and went to The Judgment, they told him , ?Before you meet with God, I should tell you ? we?ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn?t do anything...
    Infectual Infectual 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 10

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    Every time one of my friends are feeling down, I always try to make them laugh by acting a bit stupid, telling jokes or just starting at them with a creepy grin like i do to my...
    NeoNeko NeoNeko 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 10

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    What person likes to do geometry and algebra, but use balm on people that don't really move that much? A mathemortician
    DoorMattress DoorMattress 13-15, M 1 Response Jul 10

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    BEER ACCORDING TO SEVEN YEAR OLD`S A handful of 7 year old children in Australia were asked what they thought of beer. There were some interesting responses, but the last...
    openbook15 openbook15 26-30, M 1 Response Jul 10

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    The more inappropriate the more I want to laugh, it's awkward! My evil brain drags up something funny and keeps flashing it into my consciousness until I have sore lips from...