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I Make Inappropriate Jokes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 149 People

    This is coming from Lydi- "Mom,

    what's easier to unload off of trucks?" Babies or Bricks Me- "Babies" Lydi-"Do you know why?" I'm not even going to attempt this, I'm over here thinking slicing and dicing, but I don't wanna be wrong. "Why Lydia?" Lydi- "Babies because you use pitchforks" "WHAT" and this...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Dec 23, 2014

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    ._______.

    I did it the other day at the supermarket actually. I saw a jar of pickles labled "Sweet Midgets" and I said to my mom "Look, they have sweet midgets, and I don't mean really cool dwarves." I also made a few probably off-color jokes while watching Twilight...
    axelval axelval 18-21, T 5 Responses Dec 1, 2008

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    Jokes

    Have you seen Amy Winehouse lately? See looks like a campaign poster for abandoned horses Why did Hitler really die? He saw the gas bill
    Daveokay Daveokay 22-25, M Dec 12, 2010

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    Cocaine? Or Bulimia? Decisions.. Decisions....

    I am known for being inappropriate. The way my mother describes me is someone that "has no shame." Yes, that is right, I do have no shame. haha It's probably something I get from my father, oh yes, definitely so. Like for example, One time someone came up to me and...
    InsanelyMe08 InsanelyMe08 18-21, F 7 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    LOL

    An ******* went to the store to buy cheese.  He was just browering through  cheese when the ******* noticed a big round cheese. He pick it up and put into his ***-hole. LOL....
    mother1983 mother1983 31-35, F 2 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    I Just Don't Get The Snape Lust

    ...no offense, and I think Alan Rickman is very sexy... in 1988.
    Chrisanna Chrisanna 36-40, F 1 Response Jul 25, 2011

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    My Wife Gets Really Uncomfortable Around Deaf People Who Speak

    So one day we were out eating, and this table of deaf people were talking to each other in that odd way that deaf people do. She gets really uncomfortable around them, so I decided that since they couldn't hear me, that I would imitate them to make her laugh. What I failed to...
    Robf911 Robf911 36-40, M Oct 22, 2010

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    Inappropriate?

    Ok, here's the thing.  I don't usually realize that the jokes are inappropriate at the time.
    RagingSkillet RagingSkillet 31-35, M Jan 10, 2012

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    Hey Baby

    how do you like your eggs   scrambled or fertilized
    theluckyduck theluckyduck 26-30, M 8 Responses Nov 7, 2008

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    Hate It

    I hate upsetting people ...it's just a talent I have.
    HerrDoctorLiebenstrudl HerrDoctorLiebenstrudl 61-65, M 2 Responses Jun 24, 2011

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    In assembly the other day,

    this kid was pulled up in front of the school for telling a really dark joke and was made to tell everyone what he said. The entire hall was in silence and I just let out the loudest laugh ever, I couldn't help myself. I know I shouldn't have laughed, it's a serious subject. I...
    AliceRigby AliceRigby 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 12, 2014

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    Makes It Easier.

     I do this all the time, I find things are easier to deal with when you can laugh at them. Recently I have been merrily freaking people out by making self deprecating jokes about my depression. Hey, I’m medicated what’s your excuse??   A few...
    deleted deleted 26-30 14 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    being simple is beautiful.... real pretty comes naturally and no need for make ups ^_^
    whengster24 whengster24 26-30, F 46 mins ago

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    What is happiness..? Or How would you find it..? Some say you have to give this feeling of blissfulness to others.. In that way their happiness will in some way or the other...
    miandev miandev 22-25, F 1 Response 52 mins ago

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    I might be all sweet but my past was just a blur ... I can't really say it was awful because others have had worst. I am mute, I was born mute and I got bullied. One day my parents...
    TheMysteriousGirl TheMysteriousGirl 13-15, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I need some mates. Iv got some but two of them have children and I feel like they always busy. And I have low self esteem some of them make me feel bad about myself. I wanna be...
    issimma issimma 31-35, F 6 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    One hundred more. I need to remember these things more often. 101. Bubbles 102. Romance 103. Wandering the city 104. Letting go 105. Comfortable silence 106. Pianos 107. Soap...
    TheWildling TheWildling 22-25, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    When the giggles are not good! Like many young girls I was prone to fits of the giggles; only this particular one landed me in trouble. It happened in middle school. We had a...
    littlescamp littlescamp 41-45, F 3 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    I don't rage at people . . . my anger is mostly internal. But what I do have is just a weird mind. I think things that I know will make people squirm- and I mostly keep them to...
    rmcares rmcares 22-25, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    Most seniors never get enough exercise. Most seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their glasses, keys and other things thus doing more walking. It is good...
    OldPrepper OldPrepper 70+, M 1 day ago

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    Why did the skeleton NOT cross the road? BECAUSE HE DIDN'T HAVE THE GUTS TO DO IT HAHA Iamsosorrypleaseforgiveme
    bowsandarrows bowsandarrows 13-15, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    It has been a while, but when I was in my twenties, I was an *** after the addition of some suds. I have learned to control myself over the years, and now I am only inappropriate...
    TW8NY TW8NY 41-45, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Girl 15 years old here looking to make new friends. Open to most everyone, as long as it's not... Say... Inappropriate. You get my meaning.
    hime1008901 hime1008901 18-21, F 4 days ago

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    A Retired Person's Perspective: 1. I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people. I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out...
    OldPrepper OldPrepper 70+, M 4 days ago

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    Ever since my dad told me one of his dad jokes, I loved hearing and telling jokes and riddles. Thanks, dad
    aprisonerofazkaban aprisonerofazkaban 22-25, F 5 days ago

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    At first it seemed innocent enough. He asked me about my day. Then he asked what I was wearing. Then I told him that I have a boyfriend and he wouldn't be too happy that he was...
    TeresaRudolph71 TeresaRudolph71 41-45, F 5 Responses a week ago

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    I laugh at the worst times! I laughed during my exit interview when one of my jobs fired me without notice. I laughed when a cop gave me a ticket for doing 90mph in a 65mph limit...
    Xtinabytch Xtinabytch 26-30, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    Q: Why blonde jokes are one liners ? A: So than people can remember them. [follow for more. No offense to dear blondes ;) ]
    Adamsofeve Adamsofeve 26-30, M Jun 25

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    George W. Bush and his VP running mate, **** Cheney, were talking, when George W. said, "I hate all the dumb jokes people tell about me." Wise Old Cheney, feeling sorry for his old...
    lovingCuteSmartGirl lovingCuteSmartGirl 18-21, F Jun 24

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 Jun 22

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 2 Responses Jun 22

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 Jun 22

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 Jun 22

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 Jun 22

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 Jun 22

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 1 Response Jun 22

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    QUOTES TAKEN FROM ACTUAL FEDERAL EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS: 1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig." 2. "His men would...
    zydeko zydeko 18-21 Jun 22

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    Our ancestors created a device that could make us see through walls. What is it?
    xDarrell xDarrell 16-17, M 3 Responses Jun 21

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    I used to be a caregiver for A 28 year old who has severe autism and is paraplegic as well. the mother with the sheriff elevator Stickney police station in Stickney Illinois. this...
    Breeze82b Breeze82b 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 21

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    Little Charlie and his friend Jenny are only 10 years old, but they know they are in love. One day they decide that they want to get married, so Charlie goes to Jenny's father...
    Aryg Aryg 36-40, F 5 Responses Jun 21

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    I love jokes and riddles they make me smile and kind of goofy. I laugh to them and realize some laughs are just contagious. They make me stop thinking about just me but about the...
    copycat2 copycat2 18-21, F Jun 20

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    Ten year old is acting inappropriately. I cancel his play date after many warnings. He realized it was cancelled came downstairs and flips out. Husband or stupid gets involved. Do...
    alwaysmiling79 alwaysmiling79 41-45, F 12 Responses Jun 20

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    Chuck Norris can make apples from apple juice