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I Make Inappropriate Jokes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 121 People

    Hey Baby

    how do you like your eggs   scrambled or fertilized
    theluckyduck theluckyduck 22-25, M 8 Responses Nov 7, 2008

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    LOL

    An ******* went to the store to buy cheese.  He was just browering through  cheese when the ******* noticed a big round cheese. He pick it up and put into his ***-hole. LOL....
    mother1983 mother1983 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    Makes It Easier.

     I do this all the time, I find things are easier to deal with when you can laugh at them. Recently I have been merrily freaking people out by making self deprecating jokes about my depression. Hey, I’m medicated what’s your excuse??   A few...
    deleted deleted 26-30 14 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    My Wife Gets Really Uncomfortable Around Deaf People Who Speak

    So one day we were out eating, and this table of deaf people were talking to each other in that odd way that deaf people do. She gets really uncomfortable around them, so I decided that since they couldn't hear me, that I would imitate them to make her laugh. What I failed to...
    Robf911 Robf911 36-40, M 1 Response Oct 22, 2010

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    Jokes

    Have you seen Amy Winehouse lately? See looks like a campaign poster for abandoned horses Why did Hitler really die? He saw the gas bill
    Daveokay Daveokay 22-25, M Dec 12, 2010

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    Cocaine? Or Bulimia? Decisions.. Decisions....

    I am known for being inappropriate. The way my mother describes me is someone that "has no shame." Yes, that is right, I do have no shame. haha It's probably something I get from my father, oh yes, definitely so. Like for example, One time someone came up to me and...
    InsanelyMe08 InsanelyMe08 18-21, F 7 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    Inappropriate?

    Ok, here's the thing.  I don't usually realize that the jokes are inappropriate at the time.
    RagingSkillet RagingSkillet 31-35, M Jan 10, 2012

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    Hate It

    I hate upsetting people ...it's just a talent I have.
    HerrDoctorLiebenstrudl HerrDoctorLiebenstrudl 61-65, M 2 Responses Jun 24, 2011

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    ._______.

    I did it the other day at the supermarket actually. I saw a jar of pickles labled "Sweet Midgets" and I said to my mom "Look, they have sweet midgets, and I don't mean really cool dwarves." I also made a few probably off-color jokes while watching Twilight...
    axelval axelval 18-21, T 5 Responses Dec 1, 2008

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    I Just Don't Get The Snape Lust

    ...no offense, and I think Alan Rickman is very sexy... in 1988.
    Chrisanna Chrisanna 36-40, F 1 Response Jul 25, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    Vagina jokes aren't funny period.
    RrTrueAllMe RrTrueAllMe 13-15, F 1 hr ago

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    1. Sleep 2. Animals 3. Pokemon 4. Music 5. My best friends 6. My friends 7. Anime 8. Being weird 9. Singing 10. Dancing 11. Nail polish 12. Shopping 13. Mountain Dew~ 14. Warm...
    EmoSakurachan EmoSakurachan 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 26

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    I'm a married woman, and my three best friends are male. One has been my bud since high school, another has been my friend since college. My third male best friend always makes...
    FakeIsTheNewReal FakeIsTheNewReal 31-35, F Apr 4

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    My friends and I have this running joke called "Turbo Tuesday." Tuesday is the most boring goddam day of the week, because it's not Monday where you're fresh off from the weekend...
    BlueMetalChick BlueMetalChick 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 25

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    There are lots of reasons why I might laugh in an inappropriate time. It might some silly thought that pops into my head, that I personally find HILARIOUS (although I'm not sure...
    AnonymousEP77 AnonymousEP77 41-45, M 1 Response Mar 21

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    PUNOGRAPHY • I tried to catch some fog. I mist. • When chemists die, they barium. • Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. • A soldier who survived mustard gas...
    diablesse34 diablesse34 46-50, F 15 Responses Mar 24

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    A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Mar 26

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    Punography (A play on words) When chemists die, they barium. Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time...
    DanCan1 DanCan1 56-60, M 2 Responses Mar 28

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    My friend made a very funny joke - laughed to tears a and then I was on the bus going back home and remembered the joke again. It was impossible to hold in. Tears was running down...
    lecosc lecosc 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 9

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    This may seem weird, but please bear with me. I have recently created a new social networking site for all the weird and crazy people out there. It is appropriately named "The...
    TheTruePotatoKing TheTruePotatoKing 13-15, M 1 Response Apr 12

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    I want to make new friends, because my old ones suck. I really would love a friend who is genuine and doesn't want anything but to talk/listen, laugh with, and open with each other...
    PerfectlyImperfect13 PerfectlyImperfect13 18-21, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    Remember peter pipper? I'm not even sure if I mispelled it but remembering those riddle were like reminiscing of the past. I love humor, it does makes sense to me. O do love jokes...
    patooooots patooooots 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 22

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    How Many Sheep Do I Have? There once was a blonde who was very tired of blonde jokes and insults directed at her intelligence. So, she cut and dyed her hair, got a make-over...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    Animal Jokes Question And Answer Animal Jokes Q: Diner: I can't eat this chicken. Call the manager. A: Waiter: It's no use. He can't eat it either. Q: Which side of a...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    In anticipation of a TV drama that is going to be shown soon based on the life of my favourite comedian, Tommy Cooper, here are some of his jokes. ********************** I went...
    vector8 vector8 46-50, F 1 day ago

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    Mandrew the clown, that'll be my name. My real name is Andrewso it makes sense. I've just called a few hospitals enquiring about going in and cheering up the children. I know what...
    baconrind baconrind 26-30, M 1 Response Apr 2

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    Bill, Hillary and Vice President Gore were on their way back to Washington on Air Force One, when Bill said " I'd like to drop a $100 bill out of the plane and make one person very...
    halo198 halo198 51-55, M 1 Response Apr 6

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    A policeman sends his wife and kid to a resort for a vacation. After a week, he joined them in the hotel. As soon as he came to the hotel room, he wanted to make love to his wife...
    enriqueclasico enriqueclasico 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 21

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    How can it be when I can't see, The man who means so much to me!! The thrill I get when he answers my post Warms my heart like golden toast!! I don't know what he looks like, Or...
    Sandyshaw13 Sandyshaw13 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 4

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    What makes a pizza maker and a gynecologist alike ? They both can feel and smell but not allowed to taste :)
    Bigbadwerewolf Bigbadwerewolf 22-25, M Mar 22

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    Idk if this counts as a joke but I thought it was funny! I was having dinner with my hubby and my sister in-law and her hubby as well as our kids, we were talking about my husband...
    queediana82 queediana82 31-35, F Mar 25

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    Make It Off The Island There were three people stranded on an island, a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 4 Responses Mar 27

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    At all. My sister saw the movie "This is the End," and she told me one of the many off-putting elements of the movie was a rape joke that was made in it. It turned me off from...
    Whoami30 Whoami30 26-30, M Mar 28

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    Coworkers. . . My job as much work as I do getting paid really **** for it has made me realize somethings. I've met some people that have become like family to me. Their opinions...
    TaurasiWade TaurasiWade 18-21, F Apr 6

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    The REASON that I'm TIRED! For a couple of years I’ve been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but now I found out the real reason: I’m tired...
    StarSphere StarSphere 51-55, M Apr 8

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    So Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny...
    leoP87 leoP87 22-25, M Apr 8

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    A teacher is getting to know her new pupils on the first day of school. She turns to one little girl and says, “What does your daddy do?” “Whatever Mummy tells him,” the...
    mona87 mona87 46-50, F 8 Responses Apr 8

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    The problem of modern comedians these days is that they rely heavily on sex jokes, drug references and profanity. Jay Leno doesn't need to do that because he's a down-to-earth...
    Monstermaster13 Monstermaster13 22-25, M Apr 11

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    Delivering a speech at a banquet on the night of his arrival in a large city, a visiting minister told several anecdotes he expected to repeat at meetings the next day. Because he...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Apr 12

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    What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment. I like BAD jokes :)
    CaptainBenza CaptainBenza 18-21, M 3 days ago

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    Following a courtroom exchange between a defense attorney and a farmer with a claim of bodily injury, due to a car collision. The case was against an insurance agent, driver of...
    jenga1 jenga1 41-45, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    My uncle revisited our hometown in Kerala after long years in America. The place had changed so much and there were vehicles coming at him from all directions. “Sir, how do you...
    mona87 mona87 46-50, F 1 day ago

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    A man walked out to the street and caught a taxi just going by. He got into the taxi, and the cabbie said, "Perfect timing. You're just like Ryan" Passenger: "Who?" Cabbie: "Ryan...
    ssluvsvms ssluvsvms 36-40, M 1 Response Mar 21

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    A very old woman realizes that she's seen and done everything and the time has come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she...
    Joseph86 Joseph86 26-30, M 3 Responses Mar 21

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    A new monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old texts by hand. He notices, however, that they are copying copies, not the original...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 4 Responses Mar 23

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    Two blondes are talking to each other: - When you make love, do you speak with your husband? - If he calls me.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Mar 26

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    Serious question about a joke. Here is a joke. At the end of the joke, I ask some questions about your reaction to it. A man and a woman are alone in the elevator of a tall office...
    eddiecarbone eddiecarbone 61-65, M 7 Responses Mar 27

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    I saw this and thought it was funny. THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN: Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa , half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful! Between...
    CopperHeart CopperHeart 41-45, F 10 Responses Mar 28

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    Once upon a time, a married couple celebrated their 25th marriage anniversary. They had become famous in the city for not having a single conflict in the 25 years they had spent...
    enriqueclasico enriqueclasico 26-30, M 7 Responses Mar 29

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    An Irishman, a Mexican and a blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said: "Corned beef and...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Mar 31

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