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I My Spouse Or Partner Has Asperger's Syndrome

Do you think you are with an aspie? This is the group for you! 1,307 People

    Hi, Im new to this site,

    and anything like this. I recently found out that my BF, and as of last month, Husband has AS. I am not a Doctor, but he has all the characteristics and is on a high functioning level of it. I love him more than anything in the world, and knew he had this before i married him...
    Metalmissys Metalmissys 46-50, F 4 Responses Nov 24, 2014

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    I have been married for 8 years to a man

    that has AS. It is very challenging and I am at a point where I need support from people who get it. My friends and therapist have told me that his behavior is abusive. I have tried to talk to him about it, but he doesn't see how that is the case. I have read what many people...
    Jenni720 Jenni720 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 5, 2014

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    Well it's finally happened.

    A site that gives information and the opportunity to talk to and meet up with other NT partners. www.different-together.co.uk. There are lots of other sites and support groups for our AS partners. This one is just for us. Hope that can be respected. Had three months in a...
    Mercgirl007 Mercgirl007 51-55 1 Response Oct 10, 2014

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    I Think My Husband Has Asperger's Syndrome, But He Denies It.

    Hi, my name is Corina and I think my husband has Asperger's syndrome, but he denies it.  I met my husband Peter when we were very young and two years later we became a couple. Now, 20 years later, we still are. When I was young, I had never heard of Asperger's. I only...
    corina72 corina72 36-40, F 5 Responses Jul 21, 2011

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    I have been doing a lot

    if research on AS and I am almost 100 percent sure my husband has it. In the beginning I was attracted to him because he was SO different. I had been with a real piece of work for almost four years and when I met my husband I remember just almost feeling like I had stars in my...
    Allaboutaddi Allaboutaddi 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 30, 2013

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    It makes me so sad to write this,

    but I think it's over. I can't continue in a marriage that is so one-sided and hurtful. I want so badly to keep my family together, but trying to make it work with someone who has no regard for anyone but himself is breaking my spirit. I am exhausted. I am no quitter, but after...
    Elasticgirl Elasticgirl 36-40, F 3 Responses Oct 5, 2014

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    I have e been married

    for 20 years to a man who I suspect has HFA We have split up many times but ended up back together..we live apart a lot of the time...he is incapable of discussing our problems and takes any criticism by lashing out at me...I feel so full of resentment and anger I don't have any...
    Cls99 Cls99 51-55, F 3 Responses Feb 27, 2014

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    Whole Family of Aspies

    When our son was in 3rd grade, a teacher suggested that he might have Asperger's.  I went immeditely into denial.  My husband went home and got on the internet and read a lot of stuff and self diagnosed three days later. Now, 6 years later, I know that both my sons and...
    SheelaNGig SheelaNGig 46-50, F 9 Responses Dec 29, 2008

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    I'm at a crossroads now,

    as I have four young children with my husband of 8 years, who has undiagnosed Autism. I have always just given my husband his way. I thought I was just making him happy, and that made me happy. Until I realized that if he does not get his way, I do not deserve to be talked to...
    GMetz34 GMetz34 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 20, 2014

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    Hi I have just found this group

    and I am delighted to find I am not alone. Please forgive my comments only focusing on negative aspects of my husband, he has good qualities too. My husband of 11 years has Aspergers is telling me he can't take the pressures of family life. He is divided between staying or...
    mcecr mcecr 41-45, F 2 Responses Jul 8, 2014

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    Hi I am wondering if others have experienced

    that their spouse is asexual due to the syndrome ? This is my first time writing here. Thank you
    v636 v636 41-45, F 3 Responses Apr 2

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    Near End

    It's getting close to the moment when I realize for certain that enough is enough and that is not going to change. We've been together for a little over a year now. The first six months or so were great. He was attentive, almost obsessive. He has not been home in three days...
    zorla zorla 31-35, F 7 Responses Dec 16, 2011

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    I am currently beside myself!

    I think my partner (and father of my 17month old) has Asperger's Syndrome. We are currently separated but "trying to work it out" except he insists that i am the one with the problems and i need to see a psychologist to deal with the way i speak to him. He believes my tone and...
    graciesplayground graciesplayground 36-40, F 4 Responses Mar 30

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    I wish I could talk to my Aspie husband about

    the issues I have with our relationship, but as soon as I say anything, he gets so defensive and turns it back on me or becomes verbally abusive and punches walls or doors. He rarely admits that he contributes to our problems and on those rare occasions, he follows up with...
    TiffanyPerkins TiffanyPerkins 36-40, F 6 Responses Sep 9, 2014

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    Times, They Are A Changing.

    What the heck is going on here? I mean, I say this on a daily basis while living with a husband who is an aspie. Over the past couple of months I have strictly thought about putting into action my divorce. I recently thought about a question that he asked me sometime ago, about...
    Misspurple Misspurple 31-35, F 3 Responses Mar 19, 2012

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    I've been in a relationship with an auspie

    for over a year. I recently noticed it, while doing a case study for college. I am studying my bachelor's degree in Speech Therapy, Language and Communication. Anyway, he is 39. I am 26. I love him and I am sure he loves me. But... I am so frustrated because arguments go nowhere...
    MaggieVakarina MaggieVakarina 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 29

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    My Husband Has Aspers

    hi everyone i joined this group as i feel like i need some help or people going through and understand what im going through..i married my husband almost a year ago..he is the love of my life,my world i love him so much..but sometimes he really hurts my feelings by saying things...
    sydney2009 sydney2009 22-25 24 Responses Aug 10, 2009

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    I'm learning to deal with Asperger

    since my partner and his son moved with me and my son; his son has asperger and we have just known about it, it helps us to explain things... now I'm thinking my partner also has asperger but has not been diagnosed. He constantly shuts down with "normal" stressing things, he's...
    moniperu moniperu 46-50, F 1 Response Oct 25, 2014

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    Husband has Aspergers,

    delusional worthlessness syndrome, anxiety, and major depression disorder. Any suggestions?
    enoughrollercoaster enoughrollercoaster 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 10

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    Ah, Yes... Now It All Makes Sense.

    I just realized my husband of 3 years has Asperger's.  I always knew something was different, but I just assumed he was your typical smart, nerdy guy who was a bit socially awkward.  But, alas, that is not the case.  My man is quite clueless with non-verbal cues...
    Bella724 Bella724 26-30, F 15 Responses Oct 10, 2010

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    Autism is not a mental disorder,

    it's a developmental disorder. There is no cure for Aspergers or Autism at any age. Early Intervention like Speech Therapy, ABA Therapy and Sensory Therapy CAN help a young child to develop speech. But not always, many are nonverbal. Autism is a spectrum disorder.. No two...
    mo9906 mo9906 46-50, F May 7, 2014

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    This will be long and rambly,

    mostly because this is the first place I've found where I can vent to others who may be in similar situations that’s not FB related where everyone I know might see it. I've been dating my boyfriend (P) for about 6 months now. He has not been formally diagnosed, but he...
    lisabug75 lisabug75 36-40, F 4 Responses Nov 17, 2014

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    Just Realized What Is Going On.

    I have been with my husband for seven years plus two dating and cant believe that it has taken me this long to put all the pieces together. The signs/ red flags were all there. many many stories just like the ones I have read about in this blog. I have been in disbelieve for so...
    sameostuff sameostuff 41-45, F 3 Responses Feb 19, 2012

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    SithLordofCanada97 SithLordofCanada97 16-17, M Mar 18

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    I am 31 and my husband is 31

    as well?we are a gay couple? for the last 7 years My husband has been aware of his Aspergers Diagnosis and I, Have done a very extensive amount of research on AS. I do what I can to help him but I end up being the villain in every argument?I tell him how the lack of action and...
    KnightOfTheMadHatter KnightOfTheMadHatter 31-35, M 2 Responses Feb 22

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    Cassandra Syndrome

    I was an emotional wreck when I met him, I was 25 and divorced with an 18 mo daughter. He represented the security I longed for. He was the strong  silent type, good-looking, the perfect husband. So what if he was a little cold and distant? I figured this was the price of...
    magicbeet magicbeet 36-40, F 32 Responses Jul 14, 2011

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    Update: Divorce. I hope you're all doing well,

    and wanted to give you an update, since we've all considered divorcing our asp. spouse (or many of us at least). I got lucky in a sense, because he initiated the divorce. I'm not sure I would have had the guts. A bizarre string of events lead him to believe I've been cheating on...
    Mannon Mannon 36-40 5 Responses Jul 4, 2014

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    I NEED HELP! My boyfriend of 7 months has

    aspergers (low on the spectrum i think). I have tried communication, i really have, but i wonder how much of it is his personality, and how much is the aspergers. Let me start from the beginning. Today, I was offered a lift home by a male co-worker who i know well enough to...
    misselenamasen misselenamasen 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 11

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    I am adult ADHD and have Parkinson's.

    My wife has Asperger's and various chronic illnesses. I love my wife dearly, but most of our marriage I've wondered whether she loves me. I know she's a good person, but so many things she does are so cruel. Then again, I know I'm a good person too, and looking back I realize...
    rw57 rw57 56-60, M 1 Response Mar 22, 2014

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    I have never posted to a forum such

    as this. Things have gotten really bad for me. I am married to a man that I suspect has AS. We have a child who was recently tested and it was discovered that there is a social delay. My husband and I have been married for 3 years and things are up and down, but mostly bad...
    faithfulhope faithfulhope 26-30, F 6 Responses Feb 5, 2014

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    When I read about women in relationships with

    Aspies, I see my own life and relationship reflected so clearly in their stories. But I think my ADHD is making it even worse. My Aspie husband will never accept any role in our disharmony and blames me for everything. He tells me almost daily how he feels unloved...
    TiffanyPerkins TiffanyPerkins 36-40, F 2 Responses Sep 30, 2014

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    Help

    I don't even know where to start . . I know I am going to write a book here . . but I have been waiting so long to talk to someone. I have been married to my husband three years now. I am so alone. We dated for four years and I noticed he was different . . but I guess that is...
    jends jends 26-30 10 Responses Jan 4, 2012

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    Should I let it go one more time?

    I've become a pathetic human being, waiting for someone to give me any sort of affection, any sort of recognition. I feel that this relationship I am in is wrong on so many levels but I cannot let go and move on with my life. My bf works long hours. He devotes his life to his...
    misslonelyplanet misslonelyplanet 31-35, F 6 Responses Apr 30, 2014

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    Non Relationship

    My hubby of 7 years can go weeks barely speaking to me. he tells my friend things he should tell me and then my friend tells me. When I bring it up he always says he told me. I get so tired of being married but not having a partner. i work more hours, do most of the house work...
    crazk crazk 36-40, F 5 Responses May 21, 2010

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    Has anyone tried Neurofeedback?

    I have read that individuals on the spectrum have great results with this treatment. I met with a therapist that is specialized in this and we are hoping to get started next month. I will post if there are any positive results!
    Jenni720 Jenni720 31-35, F 3 Responses Mar 5, 2014

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    Paths To Peace

    The gift of being married brings it's own challenges without adding any diagnoses into the mixture. However, when one spouse has Aspergers, the dynamic becomes very skewed and often neurotypical spouse feels like a martyr viewing the other as a barnacle. Painful. Difficult...
    Rebecca0071 Rebecca0071 36-40, F 4 Responses Jul 7, 2013

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    Hope: 5 Stages Of Loss

    I am going to start this by explaining that I am a nurse.  I am married to a man I believe has asperger's.  He is not diagnosed, but fits the description perfectly and every quiz he has taken (or I have taken for him) has confirmed my suspicions. Suddenly all the weirdness of...
    jends jends 26-30 62 Responses Jan 30, 2012

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    Lonely, Insecure, And In Love With An Aspie (?)

    I have been in a relationship with what I am pretty sure is an Aspie (male) for 2 1/2 years now. It has been an extraordinarily painful, frustrating, ambiguous, maddening, and psychologically damaging (to my ego and emotional sanity) odyssey. I am only still in the relationship...
    pebbles111 pebbles111 41-45 4 Responses Jul 25, 2012

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    Why Does He Push Me Away Just When Things Are Getting Good?

    I have been dating a man for the last 1 1/2 years.  To my knowledge, he is not aware that he has Aspergers, but I am 99% certain that he does. There were definitely sparks flying for both of us when we first went out.  I was confused by his blunt, inappropriate...
    es42 es42 41-45 10 Responses Aug 23, 2010

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    He aspi, has ignored me

    for 2 months now above the regular ignoring as if that weren't enough already. His latest specia interest besides his laptop is his childs toy, a technical game that resides on the cell phone. Since we both work and have kids with busy lives and schedules we have very limited...
    Telah Telah 46-50, F 6 Responses Feb 2, 2014

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    Aspergers And Selfishness

    My resolve to criticise less, hold my tongue and see amazing results didn't last long. Last week Ethan came home with an iPad. A week earlier we'd had a discussion that went something like this: Ethan: Do you think we should get an iPad. Me: Absolutely not. Why do we need one...
    muddlingthroughaspergers muddlingthroughaspergers 36-40, F 4 Responses Mar 22, 2013

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    Would You Marry Your Aspie Again?

    I have a developing relationship with a man that I am very confident has Asperger's. In the first few months of our friendship he seemed quirky but harmless, but once we got to know each other and the friendship deepened I began noticing things. Things that really didn't make...
    Truthquest Truthquest 46-50, F 19 Responses Sep 3, 2012

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    Top Three Reasons I Love My Aspie

    There are a few posts up here wanting to put a positive spin on loving an Aspie and I think that is what we all need. I have been reading a book called Loving Someone with Asperger's Syndrome: Understanding and Connecting with your Partner by Cindy Ariel. I highly recommend this...
    gingerxbaybee gingerxbaybee 22-25 8 Responses Oct 6, 2012

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    New Website For NT Partners!

    Hi - I've posted about this before (when it was just a theory!) and now, today, it's starting to become a reality. This website WILL happen. If you are an NT partner and have been struggling with getting support, advice and resources, it hopes to help you: a) to understand...
    Mercgirl007 Mercgirl007 51-55 Oct 23, 2013

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    My husband has Asperger's Syndrome.

    I am having a difficult time with our marriage. We have been married two years. He is a good provider and has good traits, such as being highly focused on a hobby that interests him. He is brilliant, and has an excellent photographic memory. He excels at his career. He is...
    Solfeggio Solfeggio 36-40, F 7 Responses Jul 11, 2014

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