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I My Spouse Or Partner Has Asperger's Syndrome

Do you think you are with an aspie? This is the group for you! 2,042 People

    New Website For NT Partners!

    Hi - I've posted about this before (when it was just a theory!) and now, today, it's starting to become a reality. This website WILL happen. If you are an NT partner and have been struggling with getting support, advice and resources, it hopes to help you: a) to understand...
    Mercgirl007 Mercgirl007 51-55 Oct 23, 2013

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    I think I have reached my breaking point.

    I have tried everything to save my marriage and it never gets any better. I need to get out, but I'm terrified. He's told me that he will ruin my life if I try to leave. Has anyone successfully left their Aspie spouse?
    TiffanyPerkins TiffanyPerkins 36-40, F 2 Responses May 6, 2015

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    It makes me so sad to write this,

    but I think it's over. I can't continue in a marriage that is so one-sided and hurtful. I want so badly to keep my family together, but trying to make it work with someone who has no regard for anyone but himself is breaking my spirit. I am exhausted. I am no quitter, but after...
    Elasticgirl Elasticgirl 36-40, F 4 Responses Oct 5, 2014

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    I think my significant other has Aspergers.

    He is 55. He thinks his differences are because he was the only child of divorced parents. The mention of Aspergers sends him into a rage. We are both teachers. We have seen young students that really don't fit in. He has friends. That's mostly because he lives for sports...
    Rivercheryl Rivercheryl 51-55, F 3 Responses Jan 18

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    my husband has no sense of humor,

    im at fault a lot of the time, I prefer to do things w/out him more and more what do I do?
    megsyB megsyB 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 18, 2015

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    High Functioning Adult = Low Functioning Spouse

    Ok, so low functioning perhaps not the right words to use, but boy do I feel like that sometimes. This is suppose to be a safe place, so hopefully I won't be judged too much :} My husband of 20 years (I'm 38 he's 45) has been diagnosed recently. As many people here who are...
    perspectives perspectives 36-40, F 14 Responses Feb 25, 2012

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    Top Three Reasons I Love My Aspie

    There are a few posts up here wanting to put a positive spin on loving an Aspie and I think that is what we all need. I have been reading a book called Loving Someone with Asperger's Syndrome: Understanding and Connecting with your Partner by Cindy Ariel. I highly recommend this...
    gingerxbaybee gingerxbaybee 22-25 9 Responses Oct 6, 2012

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    Pretty Sure My Husband Has Aspergers, Feel So Angry And Disappointed

    Together for about 25 years now, he always seemed different (shy, social anxiety, trouble with change, weird outbursts at times, never able to make bond with my son), but somehow it kind of worked. For many years I felt happy with him. Then we had a child of our own. He...
    LindaTGJ LindaTGJ 56-60, F 5 Responses Aug 1, 2011

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    I have to say, that this has been an extremely

    long road. My husband has Asperger's. We didn't know, we had a pretty normal life for the first two years or so. After we had a child, moved, work got more intense, it hit. I had no idea what was happening, I began to feel misunderstood, ignored, lonely... It was awful. I...
    DeeDoo1 DeeDoo1 41-45, F 3 Responses Sep 2, 2015

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    Living With An Aspergers Spouse, A Daily Struggle!

    I have been married to a dependable, honest and caring man for almost 20 years. He is an undiagnosed case of aspergers and we have a 14 year old son on the Autism spectrum quite high functioning. It is almost enough to drive a spouse crazy dealing with the unpredictability of a...
    rubymonday rubymonday 36-40 18 Responses Mar 19, 2012

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    i think Asperger Syndrome is very similar to

    Obssesive Compulsive Personality Disorder...
    Hanahbee Hanahbee 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 16, 2014

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    Hello all, My partner of 5 years has Aspergers.

    We have a 14 month old baby girl who we adore and we are both very gentle to. The worry I have is how much my partner I shout at each other and how this must be slowly damaging her. I try so hard to make things peaceful for her and him and while no one else is involved this is...
    jewlie1975 jewlie1975 36-40, F 1 Response Jun 13, 2015

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    Hi I am wondering if others have experienced

    that their spouse is asexual due to the syndrome ? This is my first time writing here. Thank you
    v636 v636 41-45, F 2 Responses Apr 2, 2015

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    A Realization...

    Just now I was reading some older stories to help me feel less lonely, and I came across a response to a story that really resonated with me. This is part of what the response said "He continues to be selfish and I allow him to, even apologizing for being upset when I have...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Nov 19, 2013

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    So Depressing

    It's so depressing to find out the problem after a year of being with my boyfriend. Yes, he has Asperger's. For so long, I thought I was doing something wrong. I thought the reason he hurt my feelings and neglected me was somehow MY fault. He seemed like such a nice person, I...
    vavaviolet vavaviolet 41-45 12 Responses Apr 3, 2012

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    Hope: 5 Stages Of Loss

    I am going to start this by explaining that I am a nurse.  I am married to a man I believe has asperger's.  He is not diagnosed, but fits the description perfectly and every quiz he has taken (or I have taken for him) has confirmed my suspicions. Suddenly all the weirdness of...
    jends jends 26-30 62 Responses Jan 30, 2012

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    I am currently beside myself!

    I think my partner (and father of my 17month old) has Asperger's Syndrome. We are currently separated but "trying to work it out" except he insists that i am the one with the problems and i need to see a psychologist to deal with the way i speak to him. He believes my tone and...
    graciesplayground graciesplayground 41-45, F 5 Responses Mar 30, 2015

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    Autism is not a mental disorder,

    it's a developmental disorder. There is no cure for Aspergers or Autism at any age. Early Intervention like Speech Therapy, ABA Therapy and Sensory Therapy CAN help a young child to develop speech. But not always, many are nonverbal. Autism is a spectrum disorder.. No two...
    mo9906 mo9906 46-50, F May 7, 2014

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    Would You Marry Your Aspie Again?

    I have a developing relationship with a man that I am very confident has Asperger's. In the first few months of our friendship he seemed quirky but harmless, but once we got to know each other and the friendship deepened I began noticing things. Things that really didn't make...
    Truthquest Truthquest 46-50, F 24 Responses Sep 3, 2012

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    Paths To Peace

    The gift of being married brings it's own challenges without adding any diagnoses into the mixture. However, when one spouse has Aspergers, the dynamic becomes very skewed and often neurotypical spouse feels like a martyr viewing the other as a barnacle. Painful. Difficult...
    Rebecca0071 Rebecca0071 36-40, F 4 Responses Jul 7, 2013

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    My husband is a sweet man with Asperger's.

    The Asperger traits are mild in him, he has a job, he's social and has a normal kind of empathy. Still, It hurts. at times I feel like my life kind of stopped when we got married. Because of the extra responsibility, the meltdowns, all the things I have wanted to do that couldn...
    Gonnamakeapie Gonnamakeapie 36-40, F 1 Response Aug 30, 2015

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    I probably have it too,

    based on the info I've studied. But I never got tested.
    GreenButtercup GreenButtercup 36-40, F 2 Responses Jun 16, 2015

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    I NEED HELP! My boyfriend of 7 months has

    aspergers (low on the spectrum i think). I have tried communication, i really have, but i wonder how much of it is his personality, and how much is the aspergers. Let me start from the beginning. Today, I was offered a lift home by a male co-worker who i know well enough to...
    misselenamasen misselenamasen 18-21, F 4 Responses Mar 11, 2015

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    SithLordofCanada97 SithLordofCanada97 18-21, M Mar 18, 2015

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    how is it with someone with aspergers syndrome?

    I have it. I had one serious relationship. I wonder if its very miserable being with me. since she cheated and my other short relationship.
    Tallestdavid Tallestdavid 26-30, M 1 Response Aug 28, 2015

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    Should I let it go one more time?

    I've become a pathetic human being, waiting for someone to give me any sort of affection, any sort of recognition. I feel that this relationship I am in is wrong on so many levels but I cannot let go and move on with my life. My bf works long hours. He devotes his life to his...
    misslonelyplanet misslonelyplanet 31-35, F 5 Responses Apr 30, 2014

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    He has gone to bed early upset with me.

    I am slowly going mental I think. We have spent all our savings and committed to a real estate program to get ahead. My main goal for it to work is so that I may finally be free with enough money for both of us to move on. We are not young. He is 61 I am 58. We just discovered...
    nannyraine nannyraine 56-60, F 2 Responses Oct 27, 2015

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    Cassandra Syndrome

    I was an emotional wreck when I met him, I was 25 and divorced with an 18 mo daughter. He represented the security I longed for. He was the strong  silent type, good-looking, the perfect husband. So what if he was a little cold and distant? I figured this was the price of...
    magicbeet magicbeet 36-40, F 34 Responses Jul 14, 2011

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    I am married for 4.5 years,

    i met my husband in the other side of the world... i moved whit my two kids to him (this is my second marriage)... when we started living together i found out some things were not as they were supposed to be, first i tought it was the cultural diference... but whit the time i...
    TikaBuendia TikaBuendia 41-45, F 4 Responses Sep 24, 2014

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    Ah, Yes... Now It All Makes Sense.

    I just realized my husband of 3 years has Asperger's.  I always knew something was different, but I just assumed he was your typical smart, nerdy guy who was a bit socially awkward.  But, alas, that is not the case.  My man is quite clueless with non-verbal cues...
    Bella724 Bella724 26-30, F 15 Responses Oct 10, 2010

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    Feeling sad. As an aspie,

    I'm wondering are we monsters? Because all we ever seem to do is hurt people. Never make them happy or feel loved, we just hurt them. It's not are fault were too logical and have less range of emotions. We were born this way, so are we born monsters or not?
    Amichelseaoramichris Amichelseaoramichris 18-21, T 6 Responses May 2, 2015

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    Lonely, Insecure, And In Love With An Aspie (?)

    I have been in a relationship with what I am pretty sure is an Aspie (male) for 2 1/2 years now. It has been an extraordinarily painful, frustrating, ambiguous, maddening, and psychologically damaging (to my ego and emotional sanity) odyssey. I am only still in the relationship...
    pebbles111 pebbles111 41-45 4 Responses Jul 25, 2012

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    I have aspergers syndrome

    and I also have depression and anxiety as well as attention deficit disorder
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Dec 24, 2015

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    Help

    I don't even know where to start . . I know I am going to write a book here . . but I have been waiting so long to talk to someone. I have been married to my husband three years now. I am so alone. We dated for four years and I noticed he was different . . but I guess that is...
    jends jends 26-30 9 Responses Jan 4, 2012

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    Husband has Aspergers,

    delusional worthlessness syndrome, anxiety, and major depression disorder. Any suggestions?
    enoughrollercoaster enoughrollercoaster 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 10, 2015

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    As ive done extensive research on the matter I,

    along with my 3 children ages 5,4,3 all have aspergers. It is a dominant genetic, heredetary trait. It's intelligence based and for some comes with a steep price. My price., the girl i loved. She left. Me after my diagnosis at age 13. Ik wat you're thinking... 13 year old cant...
    turbojc20 turbojc20 22-25, M 1 Response May 2, 2015

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    I've been in a relationship with an auspie

    for over a year. I recently noticed it, while doing a case study for college. I am studying my bachelor's degree in Speech Therapy, Language and Communication. Anyway, he is 39. I am 26. I love him and I am sure he loves me. But... I am so frustrated because arguments go nowhere...
    MaggieVakarina MaggieVakarina 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 29, 2015

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    I am 31 and my husband is 31

    as well?we are a gay couple? for the last 7 years My husband has been aware of his Aspergers Diagnosis and I, Have done a very extensive amount of research on AS. I do what I can to help him but I end up being the villain in every argument?I tell him how the lack of action and...
    KnightOfTheMadHatter KnightOfTheMadHatter 31-35, M 2 Responses Feb 22, 2015

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    Aspergers And Selfishness

    My resolve to criticise less, hold my tongue and see amazing results didn't last long. Last week Ethan came home with an iPad. A week earlier we'd had a discussion that went something like this: Ethan: Do you think we should get an iPad. Me: Absolutely not. Why do we need one...
    muddlingthroughaspergers muddlingthroughaspergers 36-40, F 4 Responses Mar 22, 2013

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    Just Realized What Is Going On.

    I have been with my husband for seven years plus two dating and cant believe that it has taken me this long to put all the pieces together. The signs/ red flags were all there. many many stories just like the ones I have read about in this blog. I have been in disbelieve for so...
    sameostuff sameostuff 41-45, F 3 Responses Feb 19, 2012

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    He's my Teddy Bear. Sometimes he says the most

    surprising things without realizing how they sound. Yesterday he told his Mama Bear that 'we' don't know how to make soup, so he was wanting her to show him how. She said in whatever Spanish words it takes, 'You're both in big trouble if you don't know how to make soup.' I...
    GreenButtercup GreenButtercup 36-40, F 2 Responses Jun 16, 2015

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    Whole Family of Aspies

    When our son was in 3rd grade, a teacher suggested that he might have Asperger's.  I went immeditely into denial.  My husband went home and got on the internet and read a lot of stuff and self diagnosed three days later. Now, 6 years later, I know that both my sons and...
    SheelaNGig SheelaNGig 46-50, F 9 Responses Dec 29, 2008

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    it's a battle all my life.

    He refuses to do or go anywhere new. I have to find the way when we are in a new place. Even in a trip, I had so many problems with him cause he didn't listen. It's so hard to enjoy him. But deep inside, he is a kind and giving man that I love.
    Fannie3 Fannie3 61-65, F 5 Responses Sep 25, 2015

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    Is it the asperger's

    or is she just not that into me? I am in a new relationship with a woman who was diagnosed as a very mild aspie as a child. Other than being a self-proclaimed introvert, she reacts fairly normally to most social situations. She tends to become overwhelmed in large or loud...
    colenickel colenickel 31-35, F 4 Responses Sep 10, 2015

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    I Used To Ask His Mother If He Was Slightly Retarded!

    I married a man with Asperger's Syndrome in 1995...but didn't realize it until 18 years later--after he was formally diagnosed at Kaiser.I always knew Ron was very "different" from the scores of other men I had dated: He was alway super awkward in social situations (example...
    Cloudy45 Cloudy45 51-55 1 Response Dec 27, 2011

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