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I Never Let Anybody Too Close to Me

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 86 People

    Well, I Used to Not Let Anybody Close to Me...

    but I'm learning to open up to people. But only to very, very, very few people. It can get very lonely sometimes though.
    minnie22mouse minnie22mouse 18-21, F 5 Responses Dec 10, 2008

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    My Mask Refuses to Crumble

    Being numb and distant is an easy way to avoid getting hurt. However, it's also an easy way to never really connect with anyone. I've opened up to people before and they've crushed me. So it makes it really hard to open up to anyone. EP is a different story, everyone (well mostly...
    XxSperanzaXx XxSperanzaXx 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 10, 2008

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    just a little...

    ....just only so much then no more. too fearful of what they may think, i hide again. and it's a terrible thing to want to step closer, yet have to give in to my fears and pull back, away and be left with just my loneliness as company. again again. never knowing how to lay it...
    Cinderelly Cinderelly 36-40, F 3 Responses Aug 31, 2008

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    Rogue

    I never let anybody close to me. Not to spare me, but to spare them. So they don't get hurt. I allow myself to love others unfortunately, because I don't  have much of a choice on that. But as soon as their is a whiff of them getting too close, I remove myself. I know...
    RogueAlphaFemale RogueAlphaFemale 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 31, 2008

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    Somethings Never Change

    I talk - on a very superficial level, to many people.  I talk for a living - it's not a problem making small talk, making people feel good.  I don't let anyone in on the interpersonal level though -- I avoid this like the plague. It hurts WAY...
    MizzBlue72 MizzBlue72 36-40, F 2 Responses Dec 3, 2008

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    I Don't Know Which To Choose

    I want nothing more in this entire world than to just be one with someone. And because of this, I would jump at every oppurtunity I could, fall 500 feet, and break my heart. So I have to protect myself from being stupid enough to get too close to someone, because it would break...
    Angelwings7 Angelwings7 13-15, F 2 Responses Oct 8, 2011

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    Just Because

    In my lifetime, I have had too many individuals that I allowed past the inner walls that I built to protect me from those that only want to use what they can, without reguard to my feelings.  I have finally built them strong enough that even my own weaknesses can not break...
    beentherendonethat beentherendonethat 56-60, M 1 Response May 9, 2009

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    False

    They're all fake, wearing masks. Hypocrites who have no real interest. They say things like "you can tell me anything", "cheer up", "it will get better". They make false promises just to shut you up. No one truly gives a crap what happens to anyone else. They all want help fixing...
    L96Arctic L96Arctic 22-25, M 4 Responses Jan 21, 2012

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    Afraid!

     I'm afraid of letting someone close to me and getting hurt...Either physical and emotionally. Mostly because i'm like an open book and get easily hurt.....
    andreinac13 andreinac13 22-25, F 2 Responses Oct 4, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    I am sure lots of people can relate to this but I grew up in an emotionally abusive environment. My parents fought every single bloody day, screaming at each other, screaming at me...
    thiswatermelonlovesme thiswatermelonlovesme 22-25, F 7 Responses Jul 2

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    I have struggled with depression and self harm for several years now. I always feel so alone but I know part of that is my fault, because no matter how hard I try I can never let...
    mmccarth mmccarth 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I'm afraid to let anyone get close to me again because I can't stand the fact of being hurt all over again, I don't want to get attached to someone and then they leave me. I'm not...
    Blueeyedprincesss Blueeyedprincesss 16-17, F Jul 1

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    I am selective about letting people get close to me. I have come to realize that it probably doesn't matter how selective you are or not. Most people do what they want in the end...
    NerdyGirl78 NerdyGirl78 36-40, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I came to EP to be honest, and yet I still hide. I believe it's because I don't have much trust. Or is it my insecurities? I've never been with a genuinely perfect person, I've...
    Destinyyy Destinyyy 16-17, F 2 Responses Jun 28

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    Even though people may see me as a very sweet person, but the downside about it is that people can easily take advantage of your kindness and think that you're naive. You meet...
    texaschic35 texaschic35 31-35, F Jul 7

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    I crave the deepest connections with others, yet I'm too afraid to let anyone in. I love to socialize, I love to make friends, and I have a boyfriend. But that true connection has...
    laurennhem laurennhem 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 1

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    I can make friends, that's the easy part but you have to be pretty damned special to get really close to me. I've been hurt too many times to let anyone close enough to really hurt...
    elegantstorms elegantstorms 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 1

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    Basically my selectivity comes from an incident that happened to me when I was around 13 years old. I was in secondary school and I went though a phase where I was confused about...
    oknyritchie oknyritchie 18-21, M Jul 2

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    I've been hurt too much. People always leave me. I end up getting treated like crap. I put up walls. I crave physical and emotional contact with that one person. I hope that day...
    laubrown1 laubrown1 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 7

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    I'm afraid of getting close to others or having a new best friend because my best friend died over a year ago. Not only that, I have had lots of friends who have died. Others, I...
    ninathecat ninathecat 31-35 6 days ago

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    Me and my bestie were doing trust exercises because he thinks that my lack in trust is keeping me from getting close to people . He said I'm so afraid that someone will hurt me...
    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies 16-17, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    When i was 4 my aunt died of cancer, she was the first person i trusted, the only person in my family that actually believed in me. the rest of my family was absorbed with making...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jul 3

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    I try and study them first and be observant. For example if a friend that is close with the person I'm studying and the person I'm studying talks crap, I'll know not to get close...
    jacithepanda jacithepanda 13-15, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    i love to socialize however i have this fear of getting close to someone, cause its always hard when eventually they realize they don't want to be in your life anymore cause they...
    theblindbandit theblindbandit 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 1

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    It probably would be nice to have a lot of people in my life but I've realized that you can't allow just anyone in your life without really getting to know them. A person may have...
    strawberry38 strawberry38 36-40, F 5 Responses Jul 1

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    It has it's pros and cons.I like being close to people,I love getting affection and emotional intimacy and giving it back and feeling like I have this great person i can count on...
    seeminglypossible seeminglypossible 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 6

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    I am selective because I think it is important to make sure that there is a mutual compatibility rapport with one another. I think when one releases their inner most thoughts and...
    Olivia2014 Olivia2014 31-35, F 10 Responses Jul 9

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    i dont mean to get close to people it just happens.. cuz ever since my dad left my heart felt empty. so now as soon as someone comes in my life they get close to me and leave out...
    xxxalyssabrownxxx xxxalyssabrownxxx 13-15, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I prefer to be very selected in my life to reduce pain, and only care about those wants a true friendship.
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 25

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    Scared of commitment? Nope. Scared of rejection? Yes.
    Ryanholmes20375 Ryanholmes20375 18-21, M 4 Responses Jun 26

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    I hate being touched. No it isn't ptsd, i think its a phobia. It just feels awkward and uncomfortable.
    Mi5h Mi5h 16-17, F 1 Response a week ago

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    Sorry ...but I will never compromise my integrity for anything or anybody. My soul means a lot to me. Although I feel we all swerve from our true path sometimes, we are guided by a...
    johnny048 johnny048 46-50, M 1 Response Jul 8

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    Imagine this: you have a business trip in which you have to leave home for a month to meet and interact with another branch of your company. Now, imagine you're a closeted...
    youtubeninja youtubeninja 18-21, F Jul 15

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    I know I held on far longer than I should have. I know I already lost my wife/my best friend years ago. I couldn't let go of the deeply routed genuine love, the amazing memories...
    someonerandom someonerandom 22-25, F Jul 5

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    I didn't know where to write this so I guess this group seems appropriate enough.I'm pretty angry at myself,that i thought I had something under control and apparently i don't..I'm...
    seeminglypossible seeminglypossible 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 26

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    I have never killed anybody and hope I am never in the position where a choice like that has to be maid no one has the right to take another persons life but sometimes things go to...
    scotchbonit scotchbonit 26-30, M 2 Responses Jun 25

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    My husband and I started dating when we were back in high school as sophomores. He was a jock and I was attracted to that. When we graduated high school we broke up for a few...
    akahlig2 akahlig2 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 26

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    My mom throughout my childhood has had about ten boyfriends since my dad. She never got too close, never revealed secrets. She also never put me first. It's always been about her...
    naturalnobody naturalnobody 18-21, F 3 Responses Jun 28

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    I can't be with anyone, 'cause I know how I'll get.I think too much about it and I really try to be normalbut it's hard to keep myself calm. I'm ****** up.I haven't been with...
    Jakalope Jakalope 18-21, M Jun 26

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    always there is something that causes me down. but then i aint let god win! ever!!its always been some thing that god pulls me down. its the situations. he s never handled for me...
    jayr123 jayr123 31-35 Jun 30

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    When I get too close to someone...I always mess it up..smh
    sisi19 sisi19 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 17

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    I've recently started writing letters to a guy I've known for 7 years. We have a very complicated relationship and I can never let him in, so writing the letters helps because I...
    bittersweetlemonade bittersweetlemonade 16-17, F 1 Response a week ago

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    I enjoy walking around the house ;loose and free. I do not get too close to windows where someone might be able to see me. But even then, I think that they would probably be...
    raysmith344 raysmith344 66-70, M Jul 10

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    I wish I could let go of so many people and so many things but these are part of me I can never let them go!! No matter how much it hurts me I endure the pain I wish I was numb or...
    catxfreak catxfreak 18-21, F Jun 28

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    There was a time I felt that our love was pure and real. I say that with all confidence...even if I was only 16 then. The moment I felt sure I loved you, I knew I could never un...
    takaw takaw 22-25, F 5 days ago

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    I always help my friends and never let them alone cause i know what it's like to feel alone and i always try my best at helping them with their problems like they always help me...
    elissahindoyan elissahindoyan 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 5

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    I've had a difficult time forgetting about my past its a dark place that haunts and bothers me to this day. I've had many problems with being adopted I would cry for hours on end...
    eliteforces1001 eliteforces1001 16-17, M Jul 15

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