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I Never Thought I'd Be Where I Am Now

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 224 People

    I hate it, I hate where I am now.

    I know I should just try and be positive. I know life isn't always easy but I always had life easy. I know other's have it worse then me but I can't help but feel unsatisfied with life. I went from being a trophy wife and mom to girlfriend/part-time mom. I honestly thought my...
    Angela1989 Angela1989 22-25, F Apr 6

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    Never In A Milion Years

    I never in a million years thought I would end up in Iraq. But never the less I landed their in January 2008. I got through just fine and thought I would never be over here again and lo and behold here I sit in Afghanistan. It is crazy how life works out but it has been good and...
    donjames61 donjames61 31-35, M Jan 6, 2011

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    Not Too Bad

    When I was a kid, lets say I had different dreams for myself. I wanted to become a lawyer, fight for rights, become a lecturer one day. I wanted a family and children. I was so dilligent too. Then I took up smoking, drugs, and lying. I was the Worst liar. I must say that now...
    ThisIsMediocritiesOldAcc ThisIsMediocritiesOldAcc 18-21, F Nov 9, 2012

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    Because Of Where I Started...

    From third grade to fifth grade I been everyone push over.. The one who'd be picked on.. the one who would cheer you up regardless of how you treated me.. Then we moved to sixth grade where I believed you can have one best friend.. The one that is always there for you ( I miss...
    Kzinlove Kzinlove 13-15, F Dec 31, 2011

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    All's Well That Ends Well?

    If you told me two years ago that I'd be going to a new school which is an hour drive away, be best friends with the class 'geeks', lose my friends whom I've known for four years, have a crush on someone online, worry about getting bad results, flunk in physics, attempt to slit...
    DarkAngel123 DarkAngel123 18-21, F 4 Responses Jun 13, 2010

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    I Hate It..

    but i should stay posoitive...cause things could always, always be alot worse than they are right now.. still.....i cant help but be unsatisified with the life ive put myself into by rushing into things without considering consequences due to emotional outbursts and lack of self...
    foamborn foamborn 18-21, F 3 Responses May 4, 2010

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    When I Was Younger

    when i was younger i would sit and stare out my window and look at these teenagers with there baby's and siting in class next to people with cuts up there arm never did i think that one day they would be me pushing a baby in a pram buy the time im 13 never did i think i would be...
    shanallia shanallia 13-15, F Mar 24, 2013

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    fungirlmmm fungirlmmm 41-45, F Apr 26, 2010

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    Never Thought I'd Get Fired

    I always thought that people who got fired got fired for a reason. A real, solid reason. As in if you get fired you are a crappy worker with a crappy attitude and you deserved it. I mean seriously, who would fire somebody who was doing well for their company? Well guess what...
    KoteRahl KoteRahl 22-25, M Aug 8, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    1. Take a trip- I want this to be a trip sans relatives. Even if it's a trip by myself. I just wanna go somewhere and get some peace of mind and enjoy myself in a place where no...
    fairytalesandspiderwebs fairytalesandspiderwebs 18-21, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    You came into my life as just another person. I didn't accept for you to be the one I'd start falling for.. The one who finally made me happy. But I'm the dumbass who didn't...
    KittayGoesRawrxD KittayGoesRawrxD 16-17, F Jul 13

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    I'm depressed, I'll be the first to admit if. But it's not that bad anymore. It's a matter of getting over it. I was On and off with this British guy for a year and a half and I...
    kxCobra kxCobra 18-21, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    TESTIMONIALMY PERSONAL STORYI am 64 years old and have had nine years of chronic pain following an accident. I have numerous blown discs in my back and neck, and for about two...
    kurtrbr1975 kurtrbr1975 36-40, M Jul 4

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    Numb Numbness how did you come to hold, So strong a grasp that's crushed my soul? How did you rob me, strong and vain, and now you linger where once was pain, Like Fire raging...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 7

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    I spent the last 11 years spending my entire life savings in a long, drawn out custody battle for my son, who I lost custody of to my ex-wife when he was two. On July 4, 2010 I...
    OneLostFather OneLostFather 31-35, M 4 Responses Jul 1

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    Mind of Mirrors I glance in a mirror, I realise I fear her, This feral dirty *****. She's scratching where I itch. She glares through her hair, I'm caught in her stare. Who is...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    I've never had children and lately I've been having a feeling that I don't want to. I loved reading the experiences on this feed because some mums actually wish they never had...
    Alf8964 Alf8964 18-21, F Jun 29

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    There are stupid things ive done and said and i just wish i didnt. Idk i feel like everyone all my friends and everyone looks at me like im stupid. Even now i just am annoying...
    personidk personidk 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 5

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    Blank Walls All around me are blank walls Never moving, always the same Full of fools and a numbing pain Constantly wailing for a change These stupid grey walls Have me trapped...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    I've always had dreams of going traveling, just getting on a boat and exploring all different countries taking in all different cultures and learning new stiff about them countries...
    Vik91 Vik91 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 2

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    Drifting into Numbness I'm so tired of drifting through life. dragging my feet, not knowing or caring which way I'm heading. The world turns around me and I'm left behind. I just...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Lost There is nowhere to go Life like a maze Almost every turn a dead end Is there no way out Why am I here The lowest level of hell I'm cold and numb I can't find my way back...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    I had been talking to and sharing my everything to a woman I met on experience project. Now, she has deactivated her account and I feel so bad about it. :( . I had been in love...
    kchahajur kchahajur 18-21, M 1 day ago

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    My Savior, Pain Too numb to care, far too broken inside, bring on the pain. Just let me know I'm alive. The pain made me numb, now let it bring me back. Let it undo this torture...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Slumber I surrender to the sacred slumber as the sun rises in the sky. An aching numbness pulses through my body as I have not slept for a little while. I surrender to the...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    **Pitiful Numb** Dear diary, Can anyone see this pitiful, being inside of me? Broken hearted, yet always singing? Nothing to smile for, yet always smiling. Torn apart, and never...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Lost In Numbness Lost in numbness for years Running from pain Trapped in the freezing rain Constantly numb Pain is better than nothing at all Pain without reason, a cause, or...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    numbness lately I've been having the feeling that I don't feel anything at all and nothing is as quite as concealing as this emotional wall all these painful situations occurring...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Nothing Feeling Nothing Feeling Confusion What do I want to be? Happy or sad? Medicated or not? Hopeless or hopeful? Why do I always have to be in the middle? Or am I in the...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Louder than... Insanity of thought pervades my mind; if only incessant thinking would cease, but it runs rampant here, there, everywhere like a swelling stream into river...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Water Negative doubt creeps in like water slowly trickling down the drain. I try to submerge them but somehow they have air. I’m in a time and place were everything’s...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Not What I Used To Be I am not what I used to be. At least I don’t think it’s me. I would not know, Since now I just go with the flow. I used to be able to feel, I used...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    I thought he was my soul mate, but I see I was wrong. We liked all the same things, we were best friends. We raised two dogs together and started a business together. We started...
    FakeIsTheNewReal FakeIsTheNewReal 31-35, F a week ago

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    1. Better at piano. 2. Find a true friend. 3. Save enough to do a kitchen remodel 4. Go scuba diving 5. Get my mom dad and In laws wills done 6. Pay off all debts. 7...
    ldlbell ldlbell 41-45, F 2 days ago

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    I spent most of my life with one woman, We raised one child together, built a house together and lived a very comfortable life financially for almost forty five years. She was...
    bjf102 bjf102 66-70 2 Responses Jul 5

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    darkness, defined These empty pages, devoid of any defined reality, reign over hope more than any ink stains could bear, for this numbness resides, when pain no longer haunts the...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Numb I feel nothing at all. Inside I am dead. I hit the ground, but do not fall. I'm lost within my head. I swallow the pill that makes it go away. I become numb. I feel no...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 7

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    I would beg My ex-husband to do things with me. Things such as a date night, movies, or just taking our kids and me to go watch Fireworks on the 4th of July. He always gave me an...
    readinglover readinglover 36-40, F Jun 30

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    as the sun rises, like a zombie,Numbness trapped in this dream i watch life pass by; i wandered alone, fighting all that came in my way, struggling to make sense of this war, that...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 7

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    Numbness Numbness. Contradicting the pain I felt. Flooding through me like a dose of anesthesia. I lay. Paralyzed by the nothingness. Unable to bring myself to move. Conditioned...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 7

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    Numb I lie here, Intoxicated by numbness, It surrounds me like a cloud of thick smoke, Choking me, Seeping into my veins, my brain, I desperately search for some feeling, But my...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    I Am Emotionless pit, endless fall To the depths of insanity I crawl Timeless confusion, reeking decent Can’t find my wits I am bent Lost feelings, numb mind Destination...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Well, besides working out a lot, I only do that to stay in shape for firefighting and EMS medic work. Some patients are very, and I see a lot of things out here. Not much to me...
    quietfighter quietfighter 18-21, M Jul 15

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    1)Finish education. 2)Go to Scotland. 3)Move out. 4)Get over anxiety and become more confident. 5)Get back into writing, music and art. 6)Get a tattoo or two. 7)Get a job. 8)Do...
    labyrinthandinfinity labyrinthandinfinity 18-21, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Comfortably Numb (Addiction) I feel so numb Unfeeling even I was feeling in the beginning Of my day today Though I didn't like what I felt So like any addict I turn to my...
    Nataliefosterdoglover Nataliefosterdoglover 26-30, F Jul 7

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    Life is a roller-coaster right now i honestly don't know what to do. I feel pain mentally and physically, don't know who or what to turn to 😒
    k4m4r k4m4r 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 30

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    But I feel like ice cream and/or beer would make it better.
    ZombieBaitMaiden ZombieBaitMaiden 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 30

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    It's not a bad feeling it's more of the fact that it was unexpected. My boyfriend owns his own landscaping business and he asked me to help him with some things. apparently I did a...