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I Push People Away Even When I Dont Want to

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 8,278 People

    I Do It Unintentionally

    I don't want to push people away but whenever i am hurt. I just want to disappear, not talk to anyone and be on my own. In the process i cut off all the people from my life. I know that i need time alone to deal with the situation. I've realized that it effects the people...
    lazyangel lazyangel 22-25, M 2 Responses Feb 3, 2012

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    I push people away because I feel I'm not good

    enough. I push people away because I'm scared to let them know the real me. I push people away because I don't want unnecessary attention or the backbiting or the gossips. I push people away, Even when I don't want to.
    Dictatorse Dictatorse 22-25, M 2 Responses Nov 26, 2014

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    I always think "what if"?

    What if I never pushed that person away? It only takes one person to betray you and you completely change, you learn not to trust and keep your guard up. I always question people and their motives, it honestly scares me when people have pure intentions, it seems too good to be...
    aurorabutterfly aurorabutterfly 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 16, 2014

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    I Need You

    I want to tell you how I feel. I know that you would understand. I know that you could help me but I just can't seem to get it out.  Rather I watch myself avoid your hugs and tell you I am fine; When actually I feel like I am burning to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Sep 1, 2009

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    I just have a hard time trusting people.

    I've been screwed over by people who meant the world to me and because of those past experiences I always will keep my guard up.
    AlexisH94 AlexisH94 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 24, 2014

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    Whenever anyone gets too close to me I find

    ways to push them away. I build a wall around myself to keep them from getting closer and I distance myself from them in an attempt to make them go away. The twisted thing is I want someone to push back. I want someone that will push back and not let me push them away.
    curiousgirl1214 curiousgirl1214 26-30, F 5 Responses Jun 29, 2014

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    i cant seem to let go of all the bad my bf the

    father of my 2kids has done,so i tend to let that anger come between the little love thats left for him,
    cynR1993 cynR1993 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    Younger women dating older men mainly

    because younger women are attracted older men. older men mature, confident, stable .Mature guys always know how to treat their women.These younger women are looking for their age gap love romance.For older men, Younger women older men relationships will surely make an older man...
    minnieccaa minnieccaa 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    Younger women dating older men mainly

    because younger women are attracted older men. older men mature, confident, stable .Mature guys always know how to treat their women.These younger women are looking for their age gap love romance.For older men, Younger women older men relationships will surely make an older man...
    minnieccaa minnieccaa 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    I can't let anyone not

    even my best friends get close to me. I want to so much but old habits are hard to break. I smile everyday and laugh so their happy but I'm so scared from my past I don't want to get anymore. I'm so scared that someone will be that one person to break me. I'm already hanging by...
    Frozensilence Frozensilence 16-17, F Dec 12, 2013

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    I've done this as a way of protecting my

    feelings, I am getting better at expressing
    ElissaAcosta ElissaAcosta 16-17, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I tend to push away the good people in my life

    and I complain about having no good people in my life. I let my emotions get the best of me and sometimes I push away people when they try to help me because I'm afraid of getting to close to someone then them leaving or giving up on me like a lot of people in my life have.
    theultimatesashacourtney theultimatesashacourtney 13-15, F Dec 25, 2014

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    simplywhite simplywhite 22-25, F 2 Responses Dec 25, 2014

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    I Need You

    I pushed you away to keep you safe from hurting further.I broke your heart to make you hate me otherwise you wouldn't give up and leave.I need you in my life and miss you but I know you will not forgive me.I have lost you forever.
    memoriescargo memoriescargo 70+ 2 Responses Apr 10, 2012

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    ClaireH19 ClaireH19 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 24, 2014

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    I do this because I have a hard time letting

    people in and don't find that I trust people easily. I made the mistake by letting people see who I really am in primary school.
    InfiniteTearDrops InfiniteTearDrops 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 25, 2014

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    The newspapers call me "The Pusher.

    " I know they'll catch me eventually, but I can't help myself. I can't stop. When I get an urge to push somebody, there's no fighting it. It will happen and nobody is safe. Men, women, children, ethnics... I've pushed them all. I've pushed more people than I can remember. I don't...
    Eristocrat Eristocrat 22-25, M 3 Responses Dec 26, 2014

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    tothestars tothestars 13-15, M 5 days ago

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    He pulled the covers over her naked,

    sleeping body. She seemed at peace with herself he thought as he brushed the hair from her face. In the corner a candle flickered, sending dancing shadows around the bedroom. It had been an eventful night, one that he hadn't planned for. Stepping silently into his trousers he...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jul 24, 2014

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    I Don't Know How To Fix It

     My therapist says it stems from being an ACA and abandonment issues. She's right, when I find that I care about someone, I feel obligated to be whatever that person needs (so long as it doesn't compromise my values). Then I proceed to screw it up. Say something or do...
    ArabellaBlythe ArabellaBlythe 22-25, F 12 Responses Oct 10, 2009

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    It's Christmas Eve and I am pushing everyone

    away. I don't want to feel like I don't belong, and don't know what else to do.
    poojibp poojibp 18-21, F Dec 24, 2014

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    I look back and wonder how she was able to

    break down my walls. And everyday I think of how I'm so grateful she did. She resisted any obstacle thrown at her. She came into my life and helped me. She loved me.
    Audrina14 Audrina14 13-15, F Jan 4

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    The Wall

    I've recently figured that I don't push people away. I pretty much drive them away.  What I'm noticing is that I keep people at arm's length.  Apparently this is something everyone has major issues with.  Which is a whole different novel for a whole different time.  I'm...
    SooperSarah SooperSarah 22-25, F 7 Responses Oct 2, 2013

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    In a world full of people

    who have somebody, I find it difficult to ignore the fact that I don't have anybody. Always. At first I used to think it made me a stronger person because I never need help or anything from anyone, but I'm starting to realize it only makes me isolate myself even more. I heard a...
    yettiluch yettiluch 26-30, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    When I choose not to.

    I have a fortress of solitude and I am comfortable in my monotonous solitude.
    Minimes Minimes 31-35, F 2 days ago

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    I'm always getting hurt

    so I can never trust anyone not even my closest friends I keep everything locked up inside I can't trust anyone..
    MyScarsTellAStory2000 MyScarsTellAStory2000 13-15, F 3 Responses May 24, 2014

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    I'm afraid to get close to people,

    and when I feel vulnerable, I go into what I like to call a "self destruct" mode. I burn all the bridges I've ever built because I know I still have control of the flame. It's scary to be able to fully trust someone, and I'm scared of getting hurt. I don't let many people in.
    hornewrecked hornewrecked 16-17, F 4 Responses Jun 23, 2014

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    Whenever I have a problem

    and someone try's to talk to me about it I shut down and push them away I don't mean to I'm just scared I feel like no one really cares idk how to fix this problem and I know if I keep doing it I'm going to loose the people I love most
    Youareallbeautiful Youareallbeautiful 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 29, 2014

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    kiernanstevens13 kiernanstevens13 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 25, 2014

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    Younger women dating older men mainly

    because younger women are attracted older men. older men mature, confident, stable .Mature guys always know how to treat their women.These younger women are looking for their age gap love romance.For older men, Younger women older men relationships will surely make an older man...
    minnieccaa minnieccaa 26-30, F 5 days ago

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    The girls I'm unattracted to are the ones I run

    from. The pretty girls who seem like myths, are always so unbelievable that I tense up, like, what's the catch? I always think that it's to good too be true, I got hurt so bad by fake people that I jump to conclusions and assume people are fake...
    dksl14 dksl14 18-21, M 3 Responses Dec 1, 2014

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    I push people away because I have no hope

    for myself. I don't believe them when they actually believe in me. I push people away because I don't want they're sympathy but down inside I do, but they're better off without my weight on their shoulders. I push people away because they act like they know what's going on but...
    lportra24 lportra24 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 8, 2014

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    I push away everyone

    even though I don't mean to. Maybe it's the commitment I'm scared of or I can't give them my trust. Either way it's left me depressed and alone .
    jebony jebony 16-17, F 5 Responses Nov 24, 2014

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    sometimes I don't think it's possible

    for someone to actually love me. So when people that actually care for me try to show me I take it as they trying to play with my emotions and I push them away before they hurt me.
    Ludjina1415 Ludjina1415 18-21, F 6 days ago

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    This has happened to me

    for as long as I can remember. I feel as if people just get bored with me. It's like things are really good for awhile and then out of nowhere, I'm only an acquaintance. Maybe it's only in my head, but it does seem to happen a lot. If they don't like me, that's fine. They're...
    Jennifer337 Jennifer337 31-35, T 1 Response Jan 8

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    ActuallyGrace ActuallyGrace 13-15, F Nov 25, 2014

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    I Am My Own Worst Enemy.

    I don't understand why I do this, I don't mean to. I cannot help but push people away. I want to let people in and get close, have a loving group of friends and talk and just I don't know, feel normal. But something always does this, it pushes people I love away as well. It is...
    AreYouMadCool AreYouMadCool 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 13, 2013

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    I always do this! Not only does it get on my

    nerves but I think on my friend's nerves too. I don't mean to do it, it's just, I think ever since the incident, I tend to push people away without even realizing.
    MacabreCannibal MacabreCannibal 16-17, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    Pull.

    I always push. I never have a good reason to push. Things can be going just fine but then I get scared and push. Or the fact that even when things are truly OK, my head won't let me believe it. Thoughts will enter my head, thoughts that will tear myself down and give me some...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Dec 30, 2012

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    Goodbye My Light

    Apologies whisper behind my lips. Memories ring inside my head. The pain, the loss, the tears. Dancing with my heart, many do. Light fingertips turn to blades. I let go. So, I've blown out my light. So warm and bright. Lighting my way in the shadows. Crackling peacefully...
    SgtWalrus SgtWalrus 22-25, F 4 Responses Sep 13, 2013

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    irreelevance irreelevance 16-17, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Anytime I even make new friends I just push

    and push..it's not until someone really stops and pushes back that I try and not push. I know a lot of people but no one knows me
    Janstis Janstis 22-25, F 3 Responses Mar 9, 2014

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    I feel like I isolate myself

    because I end up caring too much. Friendships, relationships, etc. they all end sadly in my case. I contradict myself because I want to have close meaningful relationships but at the same time I don't wanna get hurt. When I feel myself caring too much I kinda retreat into my own...
    FireQueen10 FireQueen10 22-25, F 6 Responses Mar 4, 2014

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    I'm a loser and I'm ashamed of my life

    and because of that I pushed away people even when I needed them the most. I don't answer calls nor text from my friends and it's been almost a year since I talked to my best friend, I'm ashamed to tell her that I'm in the same hole that I was a year ago. I'm lost in life and...
    almasolitaria312 almasolitaria312 31-35, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    Being without a job and without anything to do

    since June, the isolation tends to make me feel as if I am alone and freaky, since I physically have no place to work that puts me in the presence of coworkers and acquaintances. It would be nice if I had people who were okay with my financial dependency on parents and some...
    WayOfDominique WayOfDominique 36-40, M 4 Responses Dec 14, 2013

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    Even when I felt like i needed to talk to them,

    I am just to scared to say what i need to say. My feelings might just be hurt even more just by misunderstood judgement. When ever i have reached out to people to help me through the problems that i had they would only just end up making me feel worse. Now I don't even know who...
    Onlyoneme18 Onlyoneme18 18-21, F 6 Responses Nov 26, 2014

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    I hope later down the road,

    if we meet again, and we're older, and we've done things with our lives, that we just sit down together and have a drink. You were very special to me... And I know you are with people you love and care about and you need them to tell you that.. The words just could not escape my...
    Shoutittotheworld23 Shoutittotheworld23 26-30, M 3 Responses May 26, 2014

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    I always feel like a joke is being pulled

    when something good happens, and I just can't let anyone in without them destroying me.
    beautifulxxsoulxx beautifulxxsoulxx 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    I don't push them away,

    they choose to be with someone else when i'm in need.
    4everShiNee18 4everShiNee18 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 24, 2014

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    This always happens once I get close with

    somebody (be it as friend or in a relationship sense) I usually like to control the pace at which I get to know someone, but once I realize they're interested in getting to know me and ask their own questions I always get scared and push them away. I don't always mean to but...
    Mikssi Mikssi 18-21, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    swegmoney swegmoney 16-17, F 2 Responses Jun 14, 2014

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