Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Push People Away

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 2,030 People

    Only just realising how much I do it.

    Being too close to anyone just ends in pain usually caused by me. It sounds like a pity party but it isn't. It simply is what it is.
    IllusiveLittleMe IllusiveLittleMe 26-30, F 1 Response Oct 22

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I crave close relationships with people

    but I always end up pushing friends away cause I feel like they don't know the real me or something. When I'm alone I feel lonely and want to be with friends but when I'm with friends I just want to be alone. What gives?!
    marskie05 marskie05 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 23

    Your Response

    Cancel

    A Void

    Sometimes I don't believe it's possible for anyone to infiltrate the heavily guarded fortress that is my psyche. If they somehow do manage to get close to the heart of "me" (probably because I've stupidly let them in), I quickly and unconsciously adjust my labyrinth walls, and...
    AllySecretSubmissive AllySecretSubmissive 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 29, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Sure Way - If You Get to Close ....

    I know that this is a defense mechanism, but I can't stop. When I care for you, and you start getting to close to the 'real' me, the one who hurts, who is scared, who really needs you -- I will push you away.  It hurts me to do this - but it is so much...
    MizzBlue72 MizzBlue72 36-40, F 4 Responses Feb 22, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Please Just Go Away...but Stay.

    You're so flipping irritating and clingy. I appreciate and am grateful for all the care that you show to me, but I don't like the extents you go to to show me how much you like/care about me. It was cute for a little bit, but then it just got annoying. And then you act all hurt...
    behindthefacade behindthefacade 16-17, F Jun 16, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I keep pushing people away

    when all I really want is a hug
    InternetKid905 InternetKid905 13-15, F 1 Response Sep 10

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Friends travel in and out of my life constantly.

    I am a difficult person and I tend to shut down. I turn off the world. I wish I could find a way to fix myself. But it's just who I am.
    DayDreamingDragon DayDreamingDragon 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 26

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I push people away when all I really want is

    someone to hug me and tell me it's okay.
    skeletonskater skeletonskater 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 9

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I try so hard not too

    but I know they'll leave when they realize how annoying,immature,and hideous I am as a person, so I have too.today my aunt told me she thinks I'm embarrassed of my family but it's the exact opposite I feel like I come short to my families expectations
    xosydneeox xosydneeox 16-17, F 2 Responses Dec 24, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Used To Push Away The Wrong People...

    ...nowadays, I only push away toxic people who try to drag others down with them. Like so many others with a lack of self-respect, I used to push away decent and supportive people, and it is a surprise that I am still on speaking terms with at least a couple of them today. To...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Mar 2, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I can't keep looking at him

    and think of what could have been anymore...
    bluegirlie98 bluegirlie98 16-17, F Oct 27

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I hate people. Just everything in our nature.

    Our human nature to get jealous. Our human nature to make bad mistakes, which can f-up everything. &So much more. I just don't understand why we're created like this. Of course sometimes it can do good but and can also do bad. Oh, and what about our human nature feelings. Like...
    ThatGirlAhtumn ThatGirlAhtumn 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 29, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    This is about the 5th time this has happened.

    I talk to a girl for a couple weeks, get to know her, we start to like each other. Then it is like a switch goes off in my brain. I lose all interest, i turn reclusive, and just want to be left alone. Slowly conversation degrades till we lose touch, then I feel a great sense of...
    System113 System113 18-21, M Jul 3

    Your Response

    Cancel

    A guy, a jerk said he cared

    for me. I really want to believe it but i know it's fake. Love i will never feel it ever.
    fuglygirlonthebench fuglygirlonthebench 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 19

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I pushed my so called best friend away

    because he changed since he lost weight. Now that he's in shape he's confidence went sky high and speaks before he thinks I've been biting my tongue because I hate arguing with him but I can't take it anymore. He keeps texting and messaging me I don't know how to make him...
    IamaKhaleesi IamaKhaleesi 22-25, F Jun 18

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I have a bad habit of pushing people away.

    I try not to though. When I go through hard times of numerous sorts, my first instinct is to push people away. I have this mad desire to isolate myself from everyone and everything forever and live my life in complete solitude. Sometimes it's because I loathe myself and I...
    topsykrit topsykrit 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I push people away, guys especially.

    They did nothing wrong but I hate getting attached. Once they start liking me, I get scared and annoyed. Ill feel pressured and I hate it. And the worst part is ill end up feeling guilty and lonely. I feel lonely all the time. Im scared of getting attached.
    blcvk blcvk 16-17, F Jul 12

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Whenever I get attached to someone I think,

    this is going to hurt like a mother ******
    Wynnieskye Wynnieskye 16-17, F 2 Responses Aug 9

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm pushing my family away sometimes they are

    nice people and this is an awful thing to write . I talk to them sometimes but I'm trying to spend as little time with them as possible these days. I don't feel that they fully understand me. I think the dynamics between us are somewhat better than they used to be, ( at least...
    ajrestless ajrestless 22-25, F Aug 27

    Your Response

    Cancel
    RememberingSunday22 RememberingSunday22 36-40, F Nov 20

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I don't do it on purpose.

    . I just have no idea who's gonna leave and who's gonna stay..
    myhappylittlepill myhappylittlepill 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 19

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I lost a life friend in high school.

    Every guy after that cheated, and every "friend" turned their back. I went down a bad path, and it taught me I need to protect myself. But now I'm just hurting myself because I can find no companion. I find reasons to push people away, and once that thought is there I can't let...
    NotFirstNotLast NotFirstNotLast 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 5

    Your Response

    Cancel

    i really like this guy,

    but he's JUST like my father! he's an alcoholic and he has ambition to work for the same company my dad does. i can't be with him. and i told him this today. i hate catching feelings for people because now its complicated. nobody's innocent anymore. everyone has problems and i'm...
    ana95j ana95j 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 3

    Your Response

    Cancel

    ... Yeah...

    I sure do. I get attached way too easy.. and my heart goes all out. and I've been done with it. I'm kinda tired of "my friends" stepping on it.. like I'm some kind of rock to kick when they're bored or pissed off about something. Not my fault your life sucks. Everyone has...
    Cosreal Cosreal 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 11, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Demanding To Be Loved

    On this rather depressing evening, something hit me. The proverbial "light bulb" went off in my head.. I realized more details about a pattern of mine. The pattern is pushing people away..especially the people who i care about the most.. Often, people i have had or currently am...
    SweetGG SweetGG 26-30, F 4 Responses Oct 26, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's Not Me.. It's Someone I Care About...

    I've been having a hard time dealing with it, she keeps pushing me away and I miss her.. I really do.. . I wanna talk to her, hear her voice, tell her I'm just here, but I don't know what to do.. I haven't done anything wrong.... So I needed a friend's advice.. I asked a friend...
    jazzME jazzME 26-30, F Oct 30, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Push People Away

    Like most of you I had a bad childhood to. I got to know my birth parents, saw a lot of violence at an early age. Then at the age of 6 I got To be in my first group home, was there 3 different times. Nothing to brag about but at least I was safe and had food to eat, next I got...
    runawaybride3 runawaybride3 31-35 2 Responses Apr 14, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Here I go again :/ I don't

    even mean to anymore. But today I realized that I've pushed everyone away and no one knows what's actually going through my mind anymore. I tell you I'm okay and fine, but really in not... I just don't want to talk about it anymore. I want to submerge myself into my projects...
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F Oct 8

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Feel Comfortable Being Alone

     I am friendly with everyone, easy to talk with, a good listner and can make peaple laugh. But there is always this red line, a front that I can't let people pass it. Once I feel that I am getting closer with anyone, I withdraw immediatly, especially with friends. I ...
    ransha ransha 26-30, F 10 Responses Mar 5, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I think I've pushed away everyone

    who has ever cared about me. I don't even know who to talk to anymore.
    LisaTorres LisaTorres 16-17, F Dec 9

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So I have always had a really rough time

    letting myself get close to people. Once a relationship gets to a certain point, I begin to pull away and eventually let go. Usually a week or two after the "L" word comes out, I bolt. I don't know why I do this. I guess there is something wrong with me.. I don't know. I just...
    CharityDanae32 CharityDanae32 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 4

    Your Response

    Cancel

    You people walked away

    but I am not surprised. Why? Because this isn't the first time. I dont mind though. I befriended you but I bored you with being myself. So goodbye friends. Just know that if I befriended you, I'll be here as a friend for you. Just know that you have someone to talk to when...
    YoureMyDemonMyDemise YoureMyDemonMyDemise 18-21, M Jun 7

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Almost did today. Told my GF I need more,

    want more... In a relationship. That I need time to figure out if who she is is good enough for what I want. I wasn't being a dink. She swas upset, but never fights to hold on to US. No, she simply says she is who she is. And in fairness, it isn't right I should hope she...
    OldNRusty OldNRusty 41-45, M 2 Responses 31 mins ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Oh My, There's A Group For Everything, Eh?

    Okay, well I could probably write a book on this particular topic because it has truthfully been the story of my life.  I consider myself to be a pretty good guy with a pretty bad past when it comes to family and that has caused terrible trust issues.  I make a great...
    lonely031 lonely031 31-35 Dec 4, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    im tired of being alone

    but any time some one gets too close to me i push them away, i just cant seem to bond with people on an emotional level.
    m4mak91 m4mak91 22-25, M 2 Responses Oct 17

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I've Changed Because Of You

    It feels like EP is the only place where people can understand this.  More than that, there are people here who actually do it. I feel the strong urge - a sad urge - to push you away ...  because I'm afraid of hurting you. So go on, please just go away.  Go back...
    TheThird TheThird 36-40 1 Response Aug 8, 2010

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Because they will eventually leave.

    they always do.so why not be the bigger person and save them the hustle
    jollie90 jollie90 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 14, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Even if we're Best Friends

    after a while I will start to doubt you and unintentionally push you away.
    Holmesdown Holmesdown 16-17, F 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I always do! I learned

    that from my father and now I'm in therapy ! Why do we do it?
    rubysmom rubysmom 51-55, F 2 Responses Aug 26

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Painfully Ironic

    I have a really bad habit of pushing people away in my life with an ungodly intent.  I am good at it becuase I can use words to cause destruction in the most henious way possible.  I don't do it usually unless I've been hurt, but if I have, watch out as there's no limit to my...
    Breakurselfagainstmystones Breakurselfagainstmystones 36-40, M 10 Responses May 15, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Like Being Alone But I Hate That I Love It

    i had a hard childhood screw it i had a hard life. still do. i battle myself constantly. i love being alone. when im with people i get anxious and sometimes a little intimidating. i push everyone who loves me away. i am alone, because i made it this way. but i hate it also. i...
    shadowhuntersoforegon shadowhuntersoforegon 22-25, F Mar 31, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I don't want to push people away

    but I'm afraid I'll hurt them either way
    InternetKid905 InternetKid905 13-15, F Sep 14

    Your Response

    Cancel

    All my life I have been an odd duck

    so to speak. Feeling awkward all the time and never fitting in. I have a deep love of having deep intellectual conversations about many areas. I am an old soul so to speak. I have friends but nobody I have called my beat friend. When people get close to me I push them...
    willowofthewoods willowofthewoods 36-40, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I've known some people

    for 5 years who couldn't tell you a thing about me. I try to have normal relationships, but I can't bring myself to open up to anyone. I don't know how to overcome the fear that I'll hurt them or they'll hurt me
    msilver msilver 16-17, F 2 Responses Oct 25

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Im Too Scared To Be Hurt.... So I Push U Away

    i let my first boyfriend get way too close to me and he took over my life at a young age. He controlled my thoughts, my actions and my friendships. He dictated my life for 8 years and i lost my identity as well as all my friends. So when the next man came along i was very stand...
    Happymum1313 Happymum1313 26-30, F Aug 1, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Can'T Stop

    Over th years i'm not too sure how or when I did pick it up, but I've been pushing people from getting close to me almost every and any aspect. Family, relationships, friendships, etc... And its become almost a subconcious addiction,like a safey mechanism that should only be a...
    lon3lygam3r lon3lygam3r 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 30, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I always manage to push the ones I love away.

    It seem I just want to know or feel like I'm worth something. I meet someone who loved me for who I was no matter the situation I was in. And every time I dug myself into a deeper hole, he'd be by my side assuring me the rain will stop if I let the storm calm.
    TexasGypsyMommy TexasGypsyMommy 22-25, F 4 Responses Oct 26

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm afraid of becoming too attached to someone,

    because I know when I start loosening up they'll leave. It's happened too many times before to the point where its hard for me to make friends.
    12love34 12love34 16-17, F Oct 21

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm use to losing people

    that it doesn't even hurt anymore. I hate the feeling I get when I know it's inevitable. That because of how I am, people won't like me. But I know that I can't change it. I'm not gonna worry about it. Just gonna do school and live my life.
    DayDreamingDragon DayDreamingDragon 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 11

    Your Response

    Cancel

    scared to get close to anyone

    because everyone who said that "I'll be there" left.
    msj02 msj02 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 20

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Push People Away

    I have a big problem with pushing people away.... I have huge trust issues and when they come close to me I end up pushing them away when I don't want to...I just don't want to get hurt like I did in the past... and I push them away so I won't be sad when they walk out my life...
    rae16 rae16 18-21, F 4 Responses May 7, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I have commitment issues

    so when someone starts to get close I get scared and I try to push them away. I don't like doing this because I often care about the people I'm pushing away. Like my exes I've broken up with all my bfs after they told me they loved me I don't know why and then they continue to...