I Read Bumper Stickers

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 762 People

    She Drives 55

    I saw a sticker that says "I drive 55 to help free America From Foreign oil" Now she was really driving 55 in a 70mph zone. Now I am all for freeing us from Foreign oil and putting your money where your mouth is, but please, do the speed limit! You could get some...
    Frogs2010 Frogs2010
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Aug 8, 2008

    Tailgating Bumpers

    Tailgating Bumpers     Do I look like a Hemroid? Then get off my *** Backoff I'm a postal worker. Of course you're faster, but I'm driving in front of you...
    dasmuggler dasmuggler
    36-40, M
    3 Responses Mar 19, 2009

    A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker Lord,

    help me to be the person my dog thinks I am.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    2 Responses Mar 3, 2014

    No Fat Chicks Allowed

    One of the stupidest things I read on a bumper sticker was one that said.'No fat chicks allowed!' The most ironic thing about it was the guy driving it was as big as a house with the biggest man boobs Ive ever seen on a guy! lol..WTF.      Peace...
    mojo7 mojo7
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Dec 30, 2007

    Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker: "GOD LOVES

    YOU WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!"
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jan 18, 2014

    Best One Yet....

     Obi-Wan Kenobi for President 2012- Our only hope. Saw this on a vehicle on an interstate....  Now I want to know where I can get one.....
    ComradeOwl ComradeOwl
    18-21
    May 29, 2012

    For Those Tailgaters.......

    I've seen many funny bumperstickers, but this one actually made me laugh hysterically........ "If you're going to ride my *** at least pull my hair" If I'd put bumperstickers on my car, this one would be there.
    DietIcedTea DietIcedTea
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Mar 20, 2009

    A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker: "I believe

    in dragons, good men and other fantasy creatures."
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jan 31, 2014

    Sexist Bumpers

    Sexist Bumpers     Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition. Grow your own dope, plant a man. Good Girls Go To Heaven, Bad Girls Go...
    dasmuggler dasmuggler
    36-40, M
    3 Responses Mar 19, 2009

    Just Have To Be Careful When I Read Them Driving

    I love reading bumper strickers! I do not put them on my car though I have seen some funny ones One time I was walking to my car in the parking lot and it was a bumper sticker that said it but are close enough to read this get off my tail! I laughed.
    Babeondwy Babeondwy
    41-45, F
    1 Response Dec 9, 2011

    A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker: "Freedom is

    the distance between Church and State."
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jan 19, 2014

    My Three Favorites

    "Beam me up, God, there's no intelligent life down here." And, "Mean People Suck" (there's something about that irony... the first time I saw it I came unglued laughing!) The third one reads, "do you follow Jesus this close?"
    LivingDavid LivingDavid
    46-50, M
    1 Response Jan 19, 2013

    Not Really

    I'm not actually the one that read this, but Dasmuggler is in his car at this very moment just told me he saw a great bumper sticker on the back of a Toyota Pick Up, that read: "Other than that, Miss Lincoln, how was the play?" Dasmuggler is still currently laughing...
    CuriosityKitten CuriosityKitten
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Mar 19, 2009

    You Heart What??

     Seen in the back of a Council van this morning... I ♥ sewage seriously!!
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Oct 5, 2010

    "Change is inevitable,

    except from a vending machine."
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    2 Responses Feb 5, 2014

    "God Bless John Wayne"

    The only bumper sticker that ever made me stop and actually think. I saw it in Austin, Texas of all places and it made me want to go throw on a cowboy hat, put on my spurs, wrusttle up some beers with a little lady and spit tobacco. I miss that guy.
    Inman Inman
    31-35, M
    6 Responses Jan 7, 2008

    Food Bumpers

    Food Bumpers     Bright red meat is good for you. Fuzzy green meat is not good for you. Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter There are...
    dasmuggler dasmuggler
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Mar 19, 2009

    Amusing

    At every stop sign, every light. They are my amusement for the time being when I have that minute if waiting as the cars around us rush back and forth to their area of choice. While we are stopped I begin to see your personality unfold on the bumper of your car of choice. I...
    CowgirlMagic CowgirlMagic
    18-21, F
    Nov 24, 2010

    A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker: "Life isn't

    too short. It's the longest thing anyone will ever do."
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jan 27, 2014

    A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker: Lord,

    walk beside me with your arm on my shoulder and your hand over my mouth.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jan 8, 2014

    I Do

        i read bumper stickers they are really funny  and cool . some are lame and while who wrote that **** .
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Jul 29, 2009

    A Few Favorite Bumper Stickers

    Club Soda, Not Seals I Support Your Right To Arm Bears DMA: Mothers Against Dyslexia I May Be Slow But I'm Ahead Of You My Other Car Is A Piece Of Crap Too Pennsylvania - The Best Politicians Money Can Buy Kentucky - Land Of Beautiful Horses And Fast Women Honk If You're...
    ElLagarto ElLagarto
    56-60, M
    6 Responses Jul 14, 2007
    Babeondwy Babeondwy
    41-45, F
    Jul 10, 2015

    I wish they were more popular

    where I am now but sure thing I always read stickers on cars.
    4biandu 4biandu
    31-35, F
    1 Response Nov 1, 2014

    Here's The One I Love Best...

    If slaughterhouses had glass walls, we'd all be vegetarians.
    GottaHaveHope GottaHaveHope
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Aug 1, 2011

    If You Can Read This....

    I love bumper stickers, they are such a great way to gage a geographical location; what is important to the community? Who is that person in the car, if they give you a funny hint. People don't wear their political viewpoints or hobbies on their sleeves but they will on a bumper...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Aug 1, 2008

    Sweet Surprise

    While I enjoy reading bumper stickers, I also love to read the random things "written" in the dust on the back of vehicles. On our way to Illinois one summer, we came across a semi-trailer that had "Flash me for a free balloon" written on the back with a...
    PoeticRejection PoeticRejection
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 19, 2007

    "Few women admit their age,

    Few men act it! " "I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!"
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Mar 23, 2014

    Some Are Just Wrong

    I once saw a bumper sticker that read "If you are what you eat... I could be you tonight"
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Aug 3, 2010

    Great Escaped

    " Don't Follow Me, I'm Lost To" That was my fav. bumper sticker that I have come through. I think it help for those who felt scared if anybody following them. It can help us in great way, to avoid the follower on the road.
    LisaWiserLiser LisaWiserLiser
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Mar 20, 2009

    I Can't Help But Read Them

    I love the policical ones out there right now. There are tons of them. heres a couple I found that I liked:
    allyKat allyKat
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Jul 22, 2007

    Baby Car

    one bumper sticker i wont forget in a hurry was a prominent one stuck at the back of the littlest car you've ever seen..........''DENTAL ASSASSIN"
    alieninewyork alieninewyork
    36-40
    1 Response Sep 1, 2008

    This Morning I Noticed....

    I am prone to be more or less courteous to drivers based on their bumper stickers.  For example, if someone has bumper stickers that reflect political statements that I agree with, I will happily let them in front of me.  If I disagree with their political views based...
    frontier frontier
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Sep 26, 2007

    Personal Favorite:

    "Never argue with stupid people, They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience."
    Elf Elf
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Oct 23, 2007
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Jun 6, 2013

    Does Anyone Else Do This?

    I will sometimes see a bumper sticker while driving and I will go home and see if I cant find it online and maybe print it off myself and then put it on my door to my house, or some place else in the house? I really like the striking ones that make you sit back and think a little...
    master219 master219
    31-35, M
    Dec 17, 2012

    My Favorite

    Dieters don't praise the Lard.
    retiredmother retiredmother
    56-60, F
    1 Response Aug 5, 2009

    Sometimes You Just Have To Chuckle.

    Oh my gosh, I have seen some pretty wickedly funny bumper stickers.1. I belong to P.E.T.A- People Eating Tasty Animals.2. Jesus loves you, Everyone else just thinks your an *******.3. I love to fart.4. Horn broke, watch my finger!!!I love love love love bumper stickers!! I have...
    abilene8907 abilene8907
    22-25, F
    Mar 21, 2012

    Bumper Sticker – CAUTION!

    – Driver legally blonde!
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jul 3, 2014

    I Want This One..

         And i'm not usually big on bumper stickers because i think they look tacky. "If your going to ride my *** at least scratch my back and pull my hair"
    heatherxx heatherxx
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jul 16, 2009

    I Look For Them Like A Mad Woman

    Every time I'm on the rode I'll look all over until I find one. Some of them are really funny like "I had a life but my job killed it." and "Lost your cat? Try looking under my tires.".......ok that last one was a little dark but you get the idea. The only times that I get kind...
    ChaosOutOfOrder ChaosOutOfOrder
    18-21, F
    Oct 28, 2010

    Random Bumpers

    Random Bumpers     Auntie Em. Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy. Just because my name is buddy doesn't mean you have to scream it to get my...
    dasmuggler dasmuggler
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Mar 19, 2009
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