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I Relapsed

A group for those who have gone back to addictive behaviors that we thought we had left behind 102 People

    I relapsed again Saturday night,

    I was thinking about doing it for so long. I craved it, and it just kind of happened. I feel much better now after I did it, hopefully I'll make it longer next time. Summer is coming and I don't need more scars/cuts on my legs!
    trippyprincess trippyprincess 13-15, F Mar 17

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    I didn't self-injure

    for 3 years. About a month ago now, I started again. There were a lot of stressful events around me at that time, and I can think of a million reasons why I did it, but the only reason I SI was because I chose to. I could have chosen another coping strategy, but I went back to...
    needtotellsomeone needtotellsomeone 18-21, F 4 days ago

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    What Else Is New?

    Well once again i've relapsed after i've told myself a number of countless times that I would do my best to stay focused, and remain sober...so tired, and so sick that i've gotten to the point where I no longer make promises that i'm going to stay sober bcuz, there's always a...
    Alan132 Alan132 22-25, M 1 Response May 20, 2012

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    Kind of bad, probably,

    possibly very bad.
    azigzaggylyss azigzaggylyss 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 5

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    Should I Feel Bad!?

    Long story short, I first tried crystal Meth with my two older brothers and my sister-in-law. That was about 5 years ago. We used to tweak every day. Thought we had it all under control but eventually things got ugly in a blink of an eye. So my oldest brother and his girl moved...
    M060110M M060110M 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 15, 2012

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    Recovery Vs. Relapse

    I have been an addict to self harm and a victim to bulimia since 7th grade but it had gotten progressively worse throughout high school. After a bunch of warning signs, my social worker and my therapist both had me checked out at the "crisis center" just to make sure I wasn't...
    FarrahSpada FarrahSpada 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 30, 2013

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    Insanity

       Here I am after a relapse,  hating myself for it but wanting to go out and pick-up again,  I am really sick and need help but think I am one of those addicts that will never quit, this is my 2nd relapse, 1 after 8 months clean and this one with 11 months...
    LanBobway LanBobway 51-55 2 Responses Dec 3, 2007

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    oops... not my fault.

    . I just want I be pretty...
    shannacobb2000 shannacobb2000 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 13

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    ****

    Argghhhhhh....I have relapsed and spent the last 24 hours smoking crack.  After 8 months of sobriety.  There were various triggers that contributed to my relapse like excess money and time off work.  Plus I don't think I ever fully accepted that I don't want to do...
    ReformedAutomaton ReformedAutomaton 36-40, M 27 Responses Sep 20, 2007

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    I'm so overwhelmed I've been using meth

    since November of 2013. Four days ago I had 16days clean and sober, but I relapsed. That was the longest I had gone without meth since I first used. I'm not sure if I really want to stop. I miss feeling sober and healthy. I only stayed clean off meth because I got put in rehab...
    confusednabused confusednabused 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 30

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    Again And Again

    Last night I relapsed back into self harm and purging. But it seems like the self injury is something that I relapsed back into every other month. It's getting really annoying. A few hours ago, someone also posted a triggering picture that ended up on my tumblr dashboard. I wish...
    JustForTheStories JustForTheStories 22-25, F Jul 4, 2013

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    5 months. I was so proud.

    :( Today wasn't even an especially bad day I just couldn't stop myself. I had a feeling I was going to cut again I got the blades days before I did it. I feel like such a failure... I have PE on Thursday it's gonna be so hard to hide them :(
    unfaiir unfaiir 13-15, F 1 Response May 6

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    Better Now

     Coming up to six months clean, feel great, went to treatment and it was a great help, feel confident in my recovery and myself.  My spirit is growing strong and my faith is powerful, have lots of hope today,   :D
    LanBobway LanBobway 51-55 1 Response Aug 10, 2008

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    Last Night

    I relapsed and only after 3 months of not cutting I broke last night. On my hip. Blood is all I wanted. They aren't deep but they're there. I'm seeing my boyfriend today and if he sees them I don't know what will happen. I need help. Major help.
    autumnfahey autumnfahey 16-17, F Sep 8, 2013

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    Last Night

    Last night I relapsed. I have always had an addiction to cutting/self-injury. I was doing really well. Couldn't even remember the last time I had a slip, but last night, I had a relapsed. It wasn't too severe. I cleaned up, but I can't deny for that short time, the pain felt good...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jun 25, 2013

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    ive been doing okay but ive completely relapsed.

    i havent self harmed in a while now, probably a month and everything just got all bottled up inside me and i just cant deal with anything anymore i really just want to jump in front of a train or traffic lately life has been really difficult i feel like im going crazy
    mariie97 mariie97 16-17, F Jan 29

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    I Am The Definition Of Relapse

    Whether its cutting, throwing up, not eating, or getting high. I relapse. Time and time again. I don't know why and I don't know how I just know that I can't stop. However I do know that my mom is such a *****. She causes me to feel like i need relief and I have to cut to feel...
    southernbelle864 southernbelle864 18-21, F Apr 17, 2012

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    Yesterday I Cut

    i cut yesterday during church....not the best place to do it...long story short i cut because i felt fat so i tried to cut away at my ugliness and my fattiness...
    bellamajors bellamajors 13-15, F 1 Response Apr 10, 2012

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    Well the other day I relapsed

    for the first time in a month. I was doing so well. It was so bad. I feel like im going down hill again. I have so much going on I can't seem to cope with. Everything in my life is messing up. I don't know how much longer I can fight this. I feel like giving up with life.
    WhatsThePointInLifeAnymore WhatsThePointInLifeAnymore 16-17, M 1 Response Jun 8

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    3 and a half weeks clean i couldn't make it to

    four but this is what happens when you dont want to live anymore. relapsed today. bad but not bad enough to take away the urges. i want to do it again but im scared of getting caught...
    sademptynothing sademptynothing 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 9

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    I have been clean for almost a month

    but I relapsed and now have 3 bright red scars on my left wrist, kinda obvious but i use bracelets or my watch to cover them up, coz i always cut in the same small area. Its being covered by aloe vera gel right now... i read that some people use it, but does it really work?
    LetMeGiveYourHeartABreak LetMeGiveYourHeartABreak 13-15, F Apr 7

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    NemoNoMore NemoNoMore 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 26

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    Orrale Pues

    I fuck1n relapsed god dang it life is a ***** was set up to fail since birth ..plus god is toying with my emotions ....its like COME ON f uCK ............IT LIKE A ROLLER COASTER AND IM NOT BIPOLAR
    AngelTrey AngelTrey 22-25, M 1 Response Nov 19, 2012

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    I Hate This ****

    I relapsed after 11 months clean.  ******* crack, what an evil drug itr is,  I thought I was done with it, was doing all the right things, went to treatment, was attending N.A., have a sponsor and was working the steps.  One month away from my medallion too, ...
    LanBobway LanBobway 51-55 10 Responses Dec 3, 2007

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    Legalizing Pot

    I've convinced myself that marajiuana is a safe, medicinal and harmless plant that actually trumps the pharmacucdical drugs that are synthetic and unsafe. I am an alcoholic, but pot is safe.
    gcaiken gcaiken 36-40, M 2 Responses Nov 15, 2012

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    I Relapsed For The First Time

    I stopped cutting for 2 weeks, not very long but it's a start, and i cut a few minutes ago, i don't know why i even try im only going to fail, i promised my best friends that i wouldn't ever cut myself, now how do i tell them i broke my promise and that im a failure? I hate...
    KremKalashnikov KremKalashnikov 13-15, M 1 Response Sep 8, 2013

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    You knew I’d fall in love with you the from

    the very first day when you eliminated my sadness and numbed all my pain. You gave me the confidence that before you I lacked but deprived me of things that I'll never get back. The whole time I believed you were harmless and fun; I was blinded of the damage you truly had done...
    addictionbarbie addictionbarbie 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 13

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    And just like that, one

    and a half months of progress was obliterated. And I broke more promises than I can count in a matter of 10 minutes.
    tryingtokeepcalm tryingtokeepcalm 13-15, F Jun 18

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    Relapse

    I've been battling these feelings off and on for eight years now. Sometimes it's months in between them, but the longer in between, the worse it feels when it returns. This weekend my ex came to visit, and it affected me so much more than I ever thought it would, I ended up...
    PaigePerry PaigePerry 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 19, 2013

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    so yeah.... i relapsed😭 i cut again.

    i need help... HELP ME😭🔫
    shannacobb2000 shannacobb2000 13-15, F May 29

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    I haven't cut since before Christmas,

    I go on these long brakes without it and I think I have it all under control but everything just comes back harder. I tried to resist, but I broke apart a disposable razor and relapsed. I did it right before my boyfriend got home and even when he walked in they didn't stop...
    FarrahRelates FarrahRelates 18-21, F Jan 31

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    I didn't self-harm for over a month up

    until tonight. 0 days clean again..
    IamGods IamGods 13-15, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    The Stuggle of An Artist

    I relapsed, my drug of choice was crack cocaine, and alcohol.  I entered a rehab group a few weeks ago and Ive been learning alot.  At first I was struggling with talking about my emotions especially guilt, which is ironic because i can express my feelings fluently...
    reichofthedead reichofthedead 22-25, M 1 Response Mar 12, 2009

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    My Sweet Prince..

    I could never feel this good sober..here I am, I admit it.. The human mind is a great sophisticated thing.. And i agree that the power of the mind overcomes it all.. Well this is why i wanna get so high.. I don't want to have all this "power" that is quite useless especially in...
    Rauw Rauw 26-30, M 1 Response Sep 24, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    I relapsed after 2. 5 years on drugs. I didn't think that could happen but I didn't address the depression and it took me away. I back I'm the room but I am half the person today...
    joeygolucky joeygolucky 41-45, M 2 Responses Jul 22

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    After six months of doing just fine, I relapsed with my cutting. I don't know what had gotten over me...I've been really stressed out lately and I can't seem to do anything right...
    Alto2Soprano Alto2Soprano 16-17, F Aug 11

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    9 weeks ago I decided to quit everything I was doing wrong. Cutting. Drinking. Smoking weed. And having sex. I'm having the hardest time with the cutting and drinking. I just...
    RavenEP RavenEP 16-17, T 2 Responses a week ago

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    I've been clean for 11 months and it all went away last night. What the **** is wrong with me? I have so much to lose and my family is just starting to trust me again. I feel like...
    MissA520 MissA520 31-35, F Aug 8

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    I do not believe in the supernatural. I was born and raised Catholic but I do not practice the faith. I am not sure if I could really sense death. I am not sure if it's a...
    octaliug octaliug 36-40, M 1 Response Jul 22

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    When my mom first found out I was cutting all she said was: don't let anyone at school find out. I stopped for 45 days before I relapsed this time my dad said what are people going...
    haileemattis haileemattis 16-17, F 5 Responses Jul 25

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    It's been rough. I'd tell you all about it but I know what would be said, and frankly I don't want the advice. What's right for you won't always be what's right for someone else...
    MyMonstersHideUnderMySkin MyMonstersHideUnderMySkin 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 25

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    And I relapsed... Great. I was even shaking. It felt so good but I felt bad I don't know how to put it in words but it was weird because I felt both things, is that even normal?
    Kimberlynnn Kimberlynnn 13-15, F 3 Responses Jul 26

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    i'm just in so much heartbreak i'm shaking and crying and have been for the past hour. i relapsed. ive been three months clean and it had done me so well. thank you mom, i cut...
    meowshelbs meowshelbs 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 26

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    My mum had recently relapsed on heroin. She'd tried so hard to get off them, then fell back on them. She's been clean for a few days now, my dad's trying to help her too. I...
    TheEnemyWithin TheEnemyWithin 16-17, F Jul 28

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    Its been about 6 or 7 weeks clean now. Relapsed a little and still am but not as much as i expected. I even stopped my meds which i regret because now i have stopped everything in...
    patches1999 patches1999 13-15, F Jul 29

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    After staying clean for almost a month, I relapsed tonight. It would be appreciated if you guys would pray that I can completely place my faith in God and let him lead me out of...
    IamGods IamGods 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 29

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    I'm still in recovery and I relapsed a few times already about a week ago I think. Sometimes I want to be fully recovered and other times I never want to end my ednos. School is...
    XxbixtchybellaxX XxbixtchybellaxX 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 30

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    really i wish i could turn back time . i am not making excuses, but i grew up deep in a city with a strong drug culture (Miami). a week before my 13th birthday, i smoked my first...
    Chulazon Chulazon 31-35, F 2 Responses Aug 2

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    First a brief history of me so you can get to know the skeleton of my life, but not necessarily the essence. Life can still be a b-itch, but I love it anyway: it’s my imperfect...
    WisteriaGrace WisteriaGrace 51-55, F 3 Responses Aug 3

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    My 22year old son snorted heroin for 10 months last year. I found out on Jan 31and got him into am outpatient program in early Feb. he stayed clean for 5 months and then relapsed...
    SweetPeaLove SweetPeaLove 51-55, F Aug 4

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    I was looking through some old pictures, deleting a lot of them and I saw how thin I was in my prime... Gah. I always aspired to be thinspo lol and it looks like I am, for myself...
    KilljoyKitty KilljoyKitty 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 5

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