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I Secretly Suffer From An Eating Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 146 People

    My Ed

    iv had an eating disorder for nearly 3 and half years now. its been a secret for these years - everyone thinks im really happy and normal etc but i feel so sad all of the time. its like i cant do anything right. i tried to tell my friend but it was awful and now our...
    mia27 mia27 18-21, F Feb 11, 2010

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    Depression and Eating

    I go 5 day straighy without eating.Im not hungry ,sometimes I want to vomit from the smell of food. When we have to go out to eat w/fam i worry  that im going to have ti eat. I understand depression and eating go hand an hand, Im dealing with my babies deathits only been 5...
    eyeonu1020 eyeonu1020 31-35, F 2 Responses Oct 27, 2008

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    Surprised?

    i have lately have been getting so sick, people look at me and say but why is she so sick? its because i skip meals, i dont eat. i just dont eat. i run everyday, and do lots of exercises to get rid of all the fat. i weigh less than what i should. but i stop at a certain point...
    ProfessorPsycho ProfessorPsycho 13-15, F Aug 24, 2013

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    I don't eat on purpose.

    When my parents call my name to come eat, i eat as less as possible. Before i take a shower, i look in the mirror and hate what i see. I exercise everyday for tennis in order to obtain a scholarship. I weigh around 110 and i still want to go down. I want to stay skinny and get...
    jess53139 jess53139 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 1, 2014

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    None Of My Friends Know.

    It's sooo hard to have anorexia and not be able to tell my friends! I don't want to be judged, one of my friends even said that people "choose" to have an eating disorder!! The only person that knows (Other than my family) is my boyfriend! I have no one to talk to about this!!
    Hannahs30 Hannahs30 13-15, F 1 Response May 4, 2012

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    Tomorrow I start a strict starving diet.

    I can't take this anymore. :'( im giving in...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 1 Response Feb 15

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    I used to weigh myself everyday.

    I don't now because my scale is broken. I purposely skip meals sometimes. I calorie restrict a lot. I binge. I am on both extremities of eating and not eating. Sometimes I don't tell people what I eat. I exercise randomly. Sometimes accessively. I am an emotional eater...
    Jackiebh Jackiebh 22-25, F Aug 25, 2014

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    What a Waste...

    For me, it's the best secret I've ever kept. Nobody knows. Some suspect, but it is so easy to make them believe otherwise. "Ana consumes me. I don't consume anything." That's what these pro-anorexia websites say. I am disgusted by them. I don't think these stick...
    AllysonH AllysonH 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    My Secret Battle....

    Its a secret battle that I deal with....When you hear about eating disorders, you think of skinny girls, who just think they are fat, you don't expect to see a fat girl who is struggling to lose weight, and who will skip as many meals as it takes to be skinny. So what if a fat...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Sep 4, 2010

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    Be Happy

    I am scared, genuinly scared. It's like there is a hand tightening around my neck. With every passing day, I feel it's closing my windpipe more. How is it that you believe you are so in control of everything, but in fact you'll find that that's not much the case? It starts out...
    AllysonH AllysonH 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 29, 2008

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    Compulsive Eating & Food Addiction

    I'm very sure that I suffer from Compulsive Eating Disorder and food addiction. Nobody knows this. Everyone thinks I just need to make myself stop eating. Like all EDs, it just doesn't work that way. I've done a lot of research on both and I fit so many of the criteria. I'm...
    DietIcedTea DietIcedTea 36-40, F 2 Responses Jul 4, 2009

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    I Don't Know What To Do...

    I suffer from an eating problem (disorder sounds like skin and bones, and that isn't me) I've recently told my boyfriend and my very best friend. My boyfriend doesn't know how to help, one because he doesn't understand the mind of a women and two, he worries and doesn't know...
    mandycat992 mandycat992 18-21, F Apr 9, 2012

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    Clueless

    I have been battling with Bulimia and Anorexia since I was 11. I have gone to the hospital twice from dehydration, my voice is always raspy, I always feel lightheaded, But my family has no idea. Sometimes I wish they would find out so I dont have to fight this anymore, but I'm...
    StarvedAndScarred StarvedAndScarred 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 5, 2012

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    My Secrete

    I've secretly been having a eating disorder and i've been making myself throw up after I eat. I can't even eat without throwing up I'm in the middle of a really confusing situation I either starve myself or eat and throw up. I do it about 9 times a day. I can do silently now I'm...
    666zamara 666zamara 18-21, F Aug 25, 2013

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    I secretly suffer from EDNOS.

    . I mostly suffer from symptoms of Anorexia but if I feel like I've eaten to much or I feel sick, I then feel the need to make myself vomit, which makes me feel better.. I'm currently around 173cm (5ft.7)and weigh 64kg (141.1 pounds) and currently I want to be about 60kg (132.3...
    Catho Catho 18-21, F 4 Responses Oct 24, 2014

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    Secrets

    I don't consider myself anorexic per se, only because I haven't been diagnosed. Although to say that I don't have an eating disorder would be a lie.  In the beginning of October I started having some health issues, the doctors originally thought it was an ulcer because  I was...
    pinkcorsage pinkcorsage 18-21, F Nov 21, 2012

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    I secretly suffer from bulimia,

    i am not skinny or average weight I am over weight and I'm not stupid, I know that having an eating disorder is horrible. I know that I should really tell someone but I can't. I have the fear of letting my family down, I have a fear that people will laugh at me at school. I have...
    falloutsarah falloutsarah 16-17, F Sep 28, 2014

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    I guess a lot of people have it worse

    than I do. But I still wish I didn't think the way I did about food and weight. I really don't think body size matters in other people so why do I care so much about myself? I "on-and-off" starve myself and last week I lost around 5 pounds in 3 days and I'd give anything to do...
    annafairy annafairy 16-17, F Jan 22, 2014

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    Here Goes Nothing

    So I am new here and I don't exactly know if it qualifies an eating disorder (I am not stick thin yet). I have had issues with my weight almost all my life (I am 15 yrs old) My parents have always told me to lose weight. My mother tells me I have to lose weight almost every day...
    Anonymous1297 Anonymous1297 13-15, F Apr 11, 2012

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    Selfish Needs.

    I feel embarrassed about myself. I don't fit in with other girls... I don't eat during the day, but when I get home, and my mom has made dinner, I take a few different laxatives and eat as much as I possibly can. When I'm sitting in the bathroom, I repeat over and over to myself...
    slowlyinternallyeat slowlyinternallyeat 16-17, F 2 Responses Dec 22, 2010

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    I Hate Myself..(possible Trigger For Some)

    I haven't been diagnosed with an eating disorder because I haven't seen a doctor personally about it. I just told my case manager I have body issues. I fit some of the criteria for anorexia nervosa, but I fit nearly all Ednos criteria. I am so ashamed. I have been binging several...
    brokenangel82 brokenangel82 26-30, F 3 Responses May 31, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    so my bf's ex gf is so skinny... i'm the ugly fat new gf. i hate it!!! i've had an ED for about 6yrs, on & off on recovery... relapse, you know how it is. right now i'm on my fat...
    screambloodygore screambloodygore 26-30, F 5 hrs ago

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    She has been suffering from this neuro disease for almost 2 years now. We've now hit a roadblock. As an only child, I am almost about to give up. We are short on funds and it's...
    Pugggles Pugggles 22-25 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Have had it for a long time getting the best of me now trying to battle back not going well working out everyday and eating well still not working need to get past...
    JackBull281 JackBull281 46-50, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I was just diagnosed with this today. So I'm trying to learn as much as I can. Anyone taking Topamax for it? My Dr prescribed it. We'll see how it works. What has ur experience...
    BeautifullySickkk BeautifullySickkk 31-35, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I knew it was I thing I always did but I just didn't know it had a name until a few hours ago. Since I was about 5 years old I always made up scenarios and created this world in my...
    RussianMatryoshkaDoll RussianMatryoshkaDoll 13-15, F 2 days ago

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    I am looking for a friend, gender/location/age doesn't matter as long as you won't hurt my feelings. I'm struggling with eating disorder and anxiety. I can be supportive and my...
    veronicarosy veronicarosy 16-17, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    I think it's been a bit over 5 years, but that depends on when I should count that it started. It esentially started with a semi-trauma. Maybe a bit before that but holy damn did...
    bluecupcakes bluecupcakes 18-21, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    more than one. this isn't something I like to think of as a way of being sick. you know? I just don't like the term "mental illness" it bothers me more than my own ******* illness...
    itllkillme itllkillme 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    Again, another moment of struggling... Just been wanting to give up on trying to get better. just hate eating and feeling horrible afterwards. I don't know anymore... I hate...
    brknsilence79 brknsilence79 31-35, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    I feel like I want to tell someone about my eating disorder but I think they will judge me and I'm not at my goal weight so I don't know what to do I just hate feel like this....
    Maria134747 Maria134747 16-17, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I wouldn't say I suffer from this. I actually quite like this, and my parents are encouraging me to think of it as a good thing. At first my parents didn't believe me when I told...
    kayshep kayshep 16-17, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I suffer from Bi Polar depression. When I was first diagnosed with depression, they diagnosed me with chronic depression which is depression caused by the fact that somebody wants...
    AnyExperience AnyExperience 13-15, F a week ago

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    My mom and brother were talking about eating disorders and my mom looked at me and said Emily's the one I worry about she's the one who's always looking at thins proration and...
    butterflybaby123 butterflybaby123 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 23

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    I feel like complete and utter crap. Everything hurts, and it's a result of me having this binge eating disorder thing for the majority of my life. Personally, I think it's kind of...
    philosocrastinator philosocrastinator 22-25 Jul 22

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    All these years, I've never quite known what my escapism was until recently. Is it normal? Is it a disorder? Am I mentally ill? Is it common? What is normal? Well to me, in...
    Tamikles Tamikles 26-30, F Jul 22

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    I have never officially come out and told anybody that I have/had any type of eating disorder. I used to be very restrictive with what I ate. I would have a spoon of peanut butter...
    MaraSD MaraSD 18-21, F Jul 22

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    Im always being judge by people because i have anxiety and major depressive disorder. People who don't go through this is always the first to judge me. I just want somebody to...
    bigmamajoe bigmamajoe 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 21

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    help. my boyfriends 4 year old daughter is coming to visit for a week or two. this would be my first time meeting her. Im scared and had a panic attack. I'm emotionally unstable, I...
    Kikiana1 Kikiana1 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 20

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    people just need help and encouragement...sad some people do not understand and negative comments will only push a person further down the bad road. What's really disgusting is...
    PetiteChica PetiteChica 18-21, F Jul 19

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    while I do not have an eating disorder I can relate to these kind of people a little. when I was a teen I used to make myself puke on purpose after eating ( I think it's call...
    PetiteChica PetiteChica 18-21, F Jul 19

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    I'm looking for support from someone who understands Maladaptive Daydreaming. I absolutely love daydreaming and could do it all day long. It definitely has it's rewards for me & it...
    livinglifeonpause livinglifeonpause 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 19

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    I don't like food!!! I don't want to eat, if I do it's only a very little... I'm very picky... A lot of foods make me sick... I don't know why.... I use to throw up every morning...
    auroradennen auroradennen 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 18

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