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I Secretly Think I Have Gone Mad

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 8,459 People

    The things I said I ll never do are the ones I

    do first I ve been curious about life in aspects that I never thought I would How programmed we are we ve been pretty much conditioned to be that that was accepted and ok... but are we happy?
    livingtruthfully livingtruthfully 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 26

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    why do it be like this?

    when I speak English, some American can understand me clearly but some others can not. I just wonder that why they come from same country but... I feel mad when a native speaker could not understand my English, it make my spirit completely down.
    tranglib tranglib 26-30, F 3 Responses Apr 8

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    I used to have nice long hair,

    then one day I thought it got dry and I cut it and it was ok. Then I started cutting it with my own hands which made it look ridiculous and ugly, until now I just can't stop cutting it and it looks so horrible. I think I have gone mad it's really out of my control I can't stop...
    nx10 nx10 18-21, F 1 Response May 11

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    What Is Happening To Me..?

    I've always had an assortment of issues but lately things have been getting weirder and weirder. I have been assessing myself and have noticed that I frequently have very strong ideas & thoughts about things and at the same time I have completely different thoughts that go...
    KawaiiDoll KawaiiDoll 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 4, 2011

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    I used to and maybe still get paranoid

    when I overhear random bits of conversation and think people are talking about me instead of to me like I am Mr. Scrooge in the Christmas carol when he's out and about with the ghosts. It's very weird.
    Letmebepatient Letmebepatient 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 10

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    MikusWife MikusWife 16-17, F 1 Response Feb 1

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    Is there an easy way to die thats painless

    and quick. Im sick of life and theres no hope for me
    tec129 tec129 18-21, M 5 Responses May 12

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    I am feeling hopeless.

    ... going college at the end of semester lok
    Harsh94155 Harsh94155 22-25, M Apr 15

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    I don't have anything to live for.

    nobody truly cares or loves me. It's been proven to me. I'm a failure.
    societykillss societykillss 18-21, F 9 Responses Mar 18

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    nelizabth292 nelizabth292 13-15, F 2 Responses May 2

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    So the scenario is this gal a little younger

    than me gets hired at the office I work at. She's attractive and after meeting her seemingly very gregarious, at least after a couple beers. She is looking for a place to rent in the town I live in and I just happened to finish up fixing up the spare bedroom. It makes sense...
    Letmebepatient Letmebepatient 31-35, M 2 Responses May 10

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    So, who's to determine who's gone mad

    or not? Much like every other emotion, the individual dictates if they have gone mad. I feel nothing anymore. To the point where I'm suffocating and I don't care. I don't blend in with this cruel world. I don't feel I belong. Who's to say I've gone mad and that I am just...
    inkedmommy inkedmommy 22-25, F Dec 17, 2013

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    There are days were I think I could lose my

    mind! Between work drama, drama with my kids, and my family not supporting me, it would be quite easy
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Mar 23

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    I don't know that it is much of an secret,

    and pretty sure I was just born this way. I have a hatter to keep me in check, who am I kidding the hatter Is as mad as I am. So curious as this soul. I must not be impassible. So I am indeed entirely bonkers, let me give you a lil smidgen of a secret- ALL OF THE BEST PEOPLE...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Apr 16

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    I wonder just how much hurt

    and emotional pain the human heart can actually take...before it just ceases to beat.
    tenderhearted1 tenderhearted1 46-50, F 6 Responses Dec 15, 2014

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    I have an extra voice in my head thats louder

    than the other and it disagrees with everything I say/think unless I say that I want it gone. Its the same voice as the other but just louder and it responds without me having to think of what its going to say. I've had it for as long as I can remember, is it schizophrenia?
    NocheSombra NocheSombra 18-21, F 6 Responses May 4

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    Okay so I get this weird thing

    where I start intensely psycho-anylizing my own thoughts. Like I'll just start by feeling kinda sad or happy or lonely, it usually starts with an emotion. I start thinking "Why am I feeling this? Am I really feeling this? Well I'm thinking about it so I must not be otherwise I...
    jacepierson jacepierson 18-21, M 1 Response May 12

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    I don't know how other people think,

    but based on what I can observe I don't think people think how I think. So I think my thinking must have deviated into a kind of destructive mess without me realising it and now I'm slowly getting madder and madder with time. I wonder where I'll be in 30 years.
    ImNabooThatsWho ImNabooThatsWho 18-21, T Apr 8

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    Sometimes reality just doesn't seem "real"

    enough for me and I think I'm in a dream .... Have I gone mad
    Rapsest99 Rapsest99 16-17, M Jan 4

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    Nowhere

    Run if you wish Pray your legs will save you Cry if you wish Pray your tears will clean your wounds Jump into the ocean if you wish Pray your soul will flee with the water But in all your passion for nonexistence I'm praying you would stay Us, nobodies Here, nowhere to go In my...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Sep 30, 2011

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    I Do Not Understand "normal".

    I'm a smart person.....i can tell you what an Atom is made of, what a quark is, what a gluon is, about all the earth like planets we have discovered so far, the largest star, the smallest particle, binary star systems or about how color is actually just a reflection.....etc...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Jul 2, 2012

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    My dad hates his in laws.

    For over years my dad just couldn't seem to see eye to eye with my mom's side. I've never really understood this matter till I hit a certain age. It's been 21 years of my parents marriage and whenever an event from my mom's side is about to occur my dad finds a way to ruin my...
    AtM123 AtM123 18-21, F May 15

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    It's actually not a secret.

    I tell people and then they laugh and say you're not crazy. If they can look around in the depths of my mind, they would take those words back.
    SapphicMinion SapphicMinion 26-30, F 14 Responses Apr 7

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    leon46drago leon46drago 13-15, M 3 Responses Apr 29

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    Now these days, I think I have lost my

    inhibitions of my mind. I want to drive really fast in streets, I blow all my money just because, I did my GF in Wal-Mart, and I almost drank alcohol last night. I think It's my depression or whatever. I can really look down on a guy and be friends with him the next day. I feel...
    SpiritualStoner SpiritualStoner 16-17, M 3 Responses Mar 3

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    Stickers

    So I wrote a story for my breadth subject at uni... had to hand it in a few days ago... let's hope it goes alright... Thought you people might enjoy it. NOTE: the bits that are supposed to be italicised are in *askterisks* because you can't italicise stuff on here... STICKERS...
    CaitieLynn CaitieLynn 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 16, 2012

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    You Say That Like Its a Bad Thing?????

    Actually I don't even bother to pretend it's a secret. I have begun to revel in it and I may be mad as a march hare ....But I'm lots more at ease in my own skin. This is not to make light of others pain . Just the reflections of someone who has been on this path for a long while...
    Mountainman923518 Mountainman923518 56-60, M 4 Responses Jun 6, 2007

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    the word "sad" can't

    even describe me anymore
    societykillss societykillss 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 20

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    I often confuse memories

    and dreams. Too often.
    lostboy2k lostboy2k 31-35, M 1 Response 14 hrs ago

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    Mike3569 Mike3569 22-25, M 1 Response Apr 5

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    This is no secret...I haven't GONE,

    I was simply never there to begin with...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 19

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    I personally think I'm at the verge of going

    insane. I view actions differently than others. For instance most people would think it would be cruel to experiment chemicals on small animals to see the effect. I think it is rather humorous. Anyway at least asylums are banned.
    smartish smartish 18-21, M May 3

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    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Mar 25

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    Bloody Nightmare

    I had this dream last nite, the entire length of the dream I was hoping it was only infact a dream. But the entire time i thought that " no this is it.. its not a dream and this is crazy" My dream took place outside of a house, just like every other dream I have. My...
    ginger ginger 18-21, F 4 Responses Nov 11, 2006

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    seriously it just feels like it.

    ...I don't know why but it just feels that my thinking is not normal...well as long as I keep my thoughts in my head I think everything should be fine. ( -.-)
    DarkKinkster DarkKinkster 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 30

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    My life was like I was in a horror movie

    before I got on diagnosed.
    Dahlia86 Dahlia86 26-30, F 3 Responses May 25

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    What Was I To Do

    spring break, I noticed she was always stealing a glance at me her boyfriend was a close new friend, we all went for a vacation together in a group i went with them just because one of my friends forced me all i wanted was to have a vacation on my own, to release some of the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Nov 7, 2011

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    Yep. Im There.

    This last year has been the absolute hardest and most traumatic years of my life thus far.And it literally has driven me insane.YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
    Punk1n Punk1n 31-35, F 9 Responses Oct 13, 2011

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    Some days don't u feel like u want to give up?

    To not do anything.. To be away from the world? To not talk to people or text them anymore... Sleeping is worst because then you think so much and it gets to you... And idk some days you just want to forget every memory you have
    fragmentsoftheheart fragmentsoftheheart 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 5

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    Something is trying to force me to go crazy.

    It knows everything I despise and makes sure that my life is full of it. It has a number, and I see that number when I'm most vulnerable - like it's reminding me it's there ready to screw me over again. One morning I woke up and I could feel it hovering over me like a black...
    Prisoner111 Prisoner111 31-35, F 6 Responses Apr 2

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    Sometimes really late at night.

    . to get really fast to another room in my house, I run full speed laughing like a maniac!
    lilmissdgaf lilmissdgaf 31-35, F 2 Responses Jan 2

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    I want the confess to all of you a little secret

    that I kept it hidden for the last few years ...which is I used a man who was setting the police on me ... I repeat lay phoned him even though he had asked me not to contact him because I knew he was going to get the police and once he gets the police ,the police will get the...
    Soullesss Soullesss 31-35, F 4 Responses May 16

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    I dont wanna believe it ,

    i have to type more than 25 characters this isnt good
    misssixtylime misssixtylime 16-17, F Apr 16

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    HELP PLEASE. I'm straght I thought I was bi

    but no I got super drunk and basically are a 69ed with a girl ! I have a boy friend! It was at an all girls sleepover ... The oy thing I told him was that we made out and it makes it even worse I have really bad anxioty and its a long distance relationship ! Help me .. Does this...
    helpmeplease8383 helpmeplease8383 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 22

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    it's not particularly a secret.

    It's been a long time coming and now I'm just to a point where I'm incline to let the crazy flow free.
    MyCircus MyCircus 26-30, F 2 Responses Apr 16

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    Probably am if I have to take antipsychotics.

    But seriously, my mind races with perpetual thoughts of philosophy and science and math and random things that would drive anyone else insane. Sometimes my mind clutters up with so many thoughts, I just have to sit there and wait for my brain to calm down. There are so many...
    Shadowspider15 Shadowspider15 13-15, F 4 Responses Jan 12, 2014

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