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I Self-harm

For those who self-harm and want to share their stories. 3,120 People

    I'm zero days clean again.

    I hate how people think that self harming is just cutting because it's not. I scratch. Today was the first time that I actually drew blood. It wasn't much but it was still some. I felt like I needed to do this at the time but now I feel so stupid for doing it.
    bvbandmcr bvbandmcr 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 10

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    I'm trying the Butterfly Project.

    For any of you who don't know what it is: Its when you draw a butterfly on wherever you self harm, and you write a name of anyone who wants you to stop. You can't wash these butterflies off. If you cut while the butterfly is on your arm, it dies. If you don't, it lives.
    zbubbly603 zbubbly603 16-17, F 4 Responses Mar 30

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    One cut Two cuts Three cuts Four.

    .. The voice in my head whispers "Do one more." One turns to two and two becomes five Soon I've done so many I'm risking my life It's okay though Who would care if I'm gone Sure some would cry, but, they'd move on I slice a bit deeper feeling the pain My head swimming It's a...
    Trish12321 Trish12321 13-15, F 3 Responses Jan 6

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    Started In Grade 6, Now I'M A Sophomore In High School

    I started self harming in 6th grade - my first year of middle school. I count myself lucky because I've never really been bullied... My self harm stemmed from self-hate, anxiety, depression, parental issues etc. It started with harsh snaps on my wrist and thighs with thick hair...
    TheCrookedYoung TheCrookedYoung 16-17, F 11 Responses Nov 25, 2013

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    I've been self harming

    since I was 10 years old and I'm 18 now. I don't really want to stop. It helps me in ways nothing else can. Well nothing else except maybe drugs, but I don't want to go there. I refuse to. That's why I won't see a therapist. They'll just drown me in pills until I don't know who...
    DarkEyedDreamers DarkEyedDreamers 18-21, F Nov 6

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    Had to deal with bullshit people at the

    university. Haven't been hitting my head. But I scratched the **** outta my arm. At least it's not my head.
    misanthropemeow misanthropemeow 22-25, F 4 days ago

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    If you don't understand my silence You will

    never understand my words.
    kikisalamo22 kikisalamo22 13-15, F Dec 11, 2013

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    I was walking around my house with cuts on my

    left arm from 3/4 up my arm to my wrist... I forgot to put on a long sleeve and I sat on the couch, looked down and saw my cuts. I panicked a little inside... I bolted to my room and threw on a sweater. But I'm so relieved cause I don't think anyone saw (my whole family is up...
    Waterstorm Waterstorm 13-15, F Nov 8

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    My girlfriend just took my blades away it was

    prob one of the hardest things I have ever done but I couldn't have done it with out her I have no blades with me now four years cutting this needs to be the end.
    thatone6 thatone6 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 6

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    sm1ttay sm1ttay 16-17, M 3 Responses Jul 8

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    debonaireash debonaireash 16-17, M Nov 13

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    I Have My Reasons

    Life is never easy, death is even harder. Through all my time I have only knowing pain. People always go on about how hard their life is. Many go on about how they would cut themselves if they lost their boy friend or girl friend. More say that those that self harm are attention...
    CrimsonSnow CrimsonSnow 18-21, F 5 Responses Apr 11, 2013

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    I Am Sad.

    I'm listening to slow, beautiful instrumental music in a darkly-lit room. I slowly roll back my sleeve, exposing my pale forearm. With one hand I hold my sharpest pair of scissors, and with the other I gently finger the blades, then open them wide. Bringing the fine point of the...
    noonewouldriotforless noonewouldriotforless 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 8, 2012

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    From the age of 13 iv'e had bouts of crippling

    depression, developing into insomnia, losing dangerous amounts of weight from not eating, and generally hating myself. I remember walking into science in yr11 with my hand bleeding and completely covered in cuts, my hand is mostly scar tissue on the surface now..the reaction...
    smokentokes smokentokes 22-25, M Nov 7

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    People that don't understand the feeling of

    self harm think it's 'disgusting' but they don't know how you really feel. Wanna know what it feels like? It's relief, relief from how you feel, takes your mind off things, it makes me feel human again. It's so wrong but it feels so right. It's a mental addiction. If anyone...
    cam2476 cam2476 16-17, F 5 Responses Dec 23, 2013

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    I had a dream: I woke up on the couch at my

    Nana's house. The first thing on my mind was a razor blade. I got up and rummaged through my stuff, until my fingers found the little piece of metal who had become my only friend. This time would be just like the first. But when I pulled up my sleeves, showing my wrists in all...
    sincerelymetes sincerelymetes 16-17, F 4 Responses Jan 29

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    I think ppl should know

    that the words they say hurts the are as sharp as any blade :(
    rawan99 rawan99 13-15, F 3 Responses Apr 10

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    Not only do I do it but I am obsessed with it.

    When I watch famous youtubers or even celebrities on tv I listen carefully to hear for them to mention self harm of any kind. Even if the movie doesn't involve it. At the time I want to know that these people I love and admire understands and knows what it is. But then moments...
    battlefighter battlefighter 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    I'm going to talk about something

    which is really important to me. I'm going to talk about self harm. This is serious. Self harm isn't a game. People like me don't do this for attention or something like that, no... We're just in pain. And we just need some help. We just want to live again. So please, If u know...
    sempiternalHell sempiternalHell 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 1

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    My first time I was in the bathroom crying,

    looking at the mirror. I took off all my clothes, nd just started to scratch at my skin, nd if I had any pimples or something I'd pop it. Then I started to do it more often but instead used needles, and poked myself with it, nd curve circles on my chest. I started to cut, but my...
    Tognoni2 Tognoni2 13-15, F Nov 15

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    I relapsed Sunday night.

    I was almost 4 months clean but I didn't make it. There's stuff going on with my family, and I'm just so overwhelmed with sadness, frustration, anxiety, and fear. I stayed up late at night crying, but it didn't help much. After I cut, I felt a bit more calm.
    christarose96 christarose96 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 4

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    Butterfies

    I'm 16 years old and i started cutting myself at the top of my right thigh in the summer holidays of 2012, so not that long ago, 3 and a half months? god it feels like longer...i had been down for a while about many things in my life and had honestly thought about cutting myself...
    butterflies123 butterflies123 16-17 3 Responses Nov 19, 2012

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    Cut again today after school.

    Why can't people just look past the way someone looks and dresses before they judge? It's kinda stupid.
    EmotionalEmoBoy EmotionalEmoBoy 13-15, M 4 Responses Sep 25

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    I had been clean because of him.

    He was the only one there when I started in the beginning and he knew everything. Now he hates me and everyday I break a little more. I'm just tired of it all and I don't know how much longer I can stay away from cutting. It relieves the pain. I am just so broken that even he...
    blondechick0130 blondechick0130 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I use to hit myself, really hard in the shower

    on my hip with any object, whether it be my fist, soap bottles, shower head! Anything.. The bruises were beautiful & I loved them, they helped me through everything, so I thought anyway.. I stopped about 4/5 months ago. But the last few weeks everything kinda got to me...
    Kodie99 Kodie99 13-15, F 3 Responses Nov 7

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    My first time I was in the bathroom crying,

    looking at the mirror. I took off all my clothes, nd just started to scratch at my skin, nd if I had any pimples or something I'd pop it. Then I started to do it more often but instead used needles, and poked myself with it, nd curve circles on my chest. I started to cut, but my...
    Tognoni2 Tognoni2 13-15, F Nov 15

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    sm1ttay sm1ttay 16-17, M 5 Responses Jun 3

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    My Self Harm Story

    First of all, I am a 34 year old Male and I Self Harm. I don't really know what led to this, but I have many factors. I have had Bipolar since I was young, and also had to deal with a lot, so any of those things could have been a factor I guess. My mother got severe brain...
    ManiacalTom ManiacalTom 31-35, M 4 Responses Sep 5, 2012

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    I finally told someone about my depression,

    anxiety and suicidal thoughts but I still can't get enough nerve to tell them I cut but I feel so much better to tell someone I know all of this!
    sm1ttay sm1ttay 16-17, M 3 Responses Jun 18

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    I have been depressed

    and lonely for the last month. I thought I was over this since I've been doing good in school and work. but then my friends decided to stop talking to me, I've been having hard time in class and I'm so stressed out. I don't have any one to talk to. I've thought about suicide...
    ash2533 ash2533 16-17, F 7 hrs ago

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    I'm cutting again but I was strong

    and I just don't understand how I relapsed... I'm crying and I don't even know why.. I don't talk to anybody about this cause I don't want to be an extra weight on them. I just found out my really good friend is depressed and with all my other things going on I just can't hold...
    Waterstorm Waterstorm 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 7

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    I've been clean for 5 days now

    but I don't know how much longer I can stay clean for. It's getting harder to not self harm. 5 days ago was the first time that I actually drew blood. I don't cut though I scratch. I don't think I can stay clean for much longer.
    bvbandmcr bvbandmcr 13-15, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    And, after 7 years of self-harm,

    I came to the conclusion, I had to be a masochist. Every step I took from then on, confirmed that conclusion. I felt like I finally understood this part of me. It was allways confusion before that. Questions. Why? Why are you doing that? You shouldn't do it. But since that day...
    kami2 kami2 22-25, F 5 Responses Feb 16

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    because I hate myself,

    simple really.
    24wildroses 24wildroses 13-15, F 2 days ago

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    it's weird because when I'm in

    that mood I really crave a cigarette, even though I've never smoked before. It's like my body is addicted to this toxic feeling and I need a fix
    xoxoCharlierose xoxoCharlierose 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 3

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    Today i cutt again at shool my social teacher

    was angry at the whole class for studying social study at english class and made the english teacher leave the class so he failed the whole class by tearing the test paper i was so upset so i cutt in the bathroom the next subject is biology and guess what"s the lesson it"s...
    reginacs reginacs 16-17, F 5 days ago

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    i can't stop self-harming,

    and i'm tired of it. I will get anxiety real bad, like I'll sweat, start trembling, my adrenaline pumps, sometimes I can't breath and start hyperventilating, and I used to start scratching my arm over and over and over again until I was bleeding. I have a scar on both arms and...
    killeyj killeyj 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 15

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    I've started cutting again today.

    I can't take the pain anymore.
    PokeyPringle PokeyPringle 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 7

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    How I See Self Harm

    The pain we feel inside, it is worse than any form of physical pain, it eats at you from the inside. Ever feel like nothing is right? That there is no way out? This feeling it, has not words to describe it. It kills you inside, it feels like a never ending torture. So what is the...
    TaintedSnowflakes TaintedSnowflakes 18-21, F 7 Responses Jun 20, 2013

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    My Selfharm Story

    My names Brianna, my selfharming started when I was 13, then I never really understood what it was all about, but the more I read about it and seen pictures I then started to get an idea. It began when I was going with this boy, after a month into our relationship I told him that...
    briannaduffy briannaduffy 16-17, F 2 Responses Jul 20, 2013

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    "If you're strong enough to draw

    that blade across your skin, if you're strong enough to take those pills when you think you're alone, if you're strong enough to tie that rope and hang it from the ceiling fan, if you're strong enough to jump off that bridge, my friend, you are strong enough, to live."
    indecisivebye indecisivebye 13-15, F 6 Responses Jun 18

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    The solid flow in blood glides down my wrist

    For the reasons why I cannot list I live in silence, for I would yell But my life is one big secret I cannot tell The blood stained sheets, however, tell it all They tell the sleepless nights with no one to call With nowhere to hide And only one to confide The blood stops, but...
    Anyone5 Anyone5 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 22

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    Telling someone who self-harms to "just stop

    doing it" is like telling a drug addict to sit in a room full of drugs and touch nothing
    blondechick0130 blondechick0130 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 11

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    Well, it's been about 2 weeks sense the last

    time I cut.Some would say self-harm is an addiction, and some would say it is a habbit. Either way, both are hard to break. But, they are very posible to end.Self-harm is a form of coping, but not a good one. It gives us a way to forget about our troubles and everything that is...
    screaminginshadows screaminginshadows 13-15, F 6 Responses Dec 25, 2013

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    People don't understand I don't do it to kill

    myself I do it to save myself
    sg123457 sg123457 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 6

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    Yeah. Who would? Looks a bit gay no?

    Well guess what, he cuts himself because you people make him do it. He cuts himself because of your atrocities and bullying. Because of your ignorance and hate. You made him hate himself and now he finds the solution in the blood and in the scars he have. You, society, are the...
    YoureMyDemonMyDemise YoureMyDemonMyDemise 18-21, M 5 Responses Jun 7

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    Today, I am 1 week clean,

    hopefully I can keep it up!
    sm1ttay sm1ttay 16-17, M 3 Responses Apr 29

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    You would think at 19 I would be able to move

    past it but I still struggle with it. Its been over 70 days since I last cut but I burned just a few nights ago. I'm just so done with this addiction.
    TryingToLoveLifeNow TryingToLoveLifeNow 18-21, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    I didn't used to think

    that what I was doing really counted as self-harm--I dig my nails into myself, or, recently, scratch myself with plastic silverware I've snapped in half to make it sharp--but it doesn't seem bad enough to count. The one friend who does know is pressuring me to get help, but I've...
    Flutist343 Flutist343 18-21, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    imjusttrying imjusttrying 18-21, F Nov 13

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    15 small cuts to the palm last night.

    I wasn't sad or overwhelmed, I have no idea why I did it but to be honest I don't care. I wasn't cutting deep enough to make it bleed but on the last one I accidentally cut too deep because I was using a pocket knife and it's sharp as ****. I actually plan on cutting near my...
    DarknessFalls101 DarknessFalls101 13-15, F 5 days ago

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