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I Sometimes I Feel Like I Am Not Alive

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 109 People

    I'm Not Alive

    I'm not alive,The past year,Or so,That's how I felt,now,All that's gone,I'm livin' again.
    lazycrazybasket lazycrazybasket 46-50, M Feb 19, 2012

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    Dead

    makes me think of the song "beauty from pain" by superchic... "lights go out all around me, one last candle to keep out the night. then the darkness surrounds me. i know I'm alive but i feel like i've died."
    xxbloodyfretboardxx xxbloodyfretboardxx 18-21, F May 29, 2009

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    Numb

    I don't know if feeling numb and feeling as though you aren't alive are the same thing but I'm sharing my story anyways.  This whole week, keeping in mind its only just the end of Wednesday, I've felt like a robot.  Get up at 7, go pick my girls up (I babysit, I ...
    thatonegirl18 thatonegirl18 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 10, 2009

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    Like Now

    My body is actually numb. The Neurontin does that. Bu tlately it's been hard to get out of bed. I don't see much in my future. I have smeone I like alot and plan to visit in June, and that will be like a bright star in my dark night. Right now, depression has me in its grip. I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Apr 9, 2010

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    What Is Being Alive?

    What is being alive even like anymore? It gets old, not feeling alive or feeling like I can be real. What's even the real me? I mean...how fake have I become recently? Is the pain being masked day by day starting to define who I am now? I wonder if that's how everyone works...
    7blondemoments 7blondemoments 18-21, F Mar 20, 2013

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    Last Night

    I surely did feel dead last night. I thought I was dyING! Panic attack & crying. After being hurt for so much, for so long, you really do feel numb, eventually.
    otad12 otad12 26-30, F 2 Responses Sep 16, 2008

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    Am I Still Here?

    Sometimes I feel like I am not alive, as if I am no longer a resident of my own body.  I'm forced to ask myself, "Am I still here?  Is there any part of me that is still alive inside?"  I ask myself, but I receive no answer.  Even I am not sure if I truly...
    oneandlonely12 oneandlonely12 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 21, 2010

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    Numb, Dead, Empty, Not Alive

    Sometimes things don't hurt that should. I can touch a hot pan or cold ice or someone does or says something that should hurt me, but I don't notice or care.
    KisKat KisKat 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 30, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    I feel like screaming! Just to get the anger out. I love my life but sometimes...there's a small rage inside that wants to grow into a volcano. Just angry at everything. Right now...
    ADifferentRoad ADifferentRoad 36-40, F 1 Response Jun 27

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    Does it not sound like all beings, whether animals or humans are plagued by loneliness. I think they are, isn't it common for most of us to be in company of many yet feel like an...
    toohottoresist toohottoresist 36-40, M 1 Response Jun 23

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    I'm 19 years old and I've never experienced sex or even kissed a girl. I know I'm not a talkative person but it's still strange and unfair. Am I really that bad? Everywhere, every...
    jakob95 jakob95 18-21 2 Responses Jun 28

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    You know when you want something to happen but your not sure how it will happen. So you dream about that something and you know that you cant really live there but its OK for a...
    jellybean113 jellybean113 41-45, F 6 days ago

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    I dont know what to do! Im 33 years old and im lonely. I have a husband and family and relatives but im still lonely in my heart. I never had good friends. All the girls in my teen...
    angel8i angel8i 31-35, F Jul 8

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    I have a baby father who does nothing for my son who acts like the victim 24/7 im tired of it. I always knew deep down i was gay because as women we understand each other and when...
    Khriistle182 Khriistle182 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 27

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    I know he/they all have talked to me online before about my 'issues' but it seems to go nowhere. I just need to find more things to do otherwise I'm an empty shell.
    Yleng Yleng 26-30, F 2 days ago

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    Ok so my step brother and I don't get along very well, and I know that I don't start the fights because even my dad has told me that he gets in his nerves and he is a very...
    geneticgeorge geneticgeorge 13-15, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Sometimes, I get tired. I am always looking for a surrogate family. Both my parents are alive and live within relatively close proximity to me and we could not be more distant. My...
    nightkrawla nightkrawla 22-25, F 1 Response Jul 4

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    God I wish I had a friend. I feel like I need someone to tell me that I am okay, that things will get better if I try. I guess I don't believe in myself anymore... sometimes I...
    crazyhobo crazyhobo 26-30 1 Response Jul 8

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    there are no words to describe this lack of feeling. its just there. & im struggling to find ways to know that im alive. i've been cut-free for almost a whole year now, and i dont...
    KATarinatillinghast KATarinatillinghast 16-17, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Ever since my little cousin was born five years ago I feel like my grandmother has pushed me to the side for her. She used to actually sound and look like she was actually...
    bambi147 bambi147 13-15, F 2 Responses Jun 23

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    Everywhere I go I'm looked down by because people can't understand the things I do, the clothes I wear, the way I laugh or how I sometimes feel as if my heart will explode with...
    MorbidPeaches MorbidPeaches 13-15, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I feel like I've been through so much and go through so much each day. Sometimes it's so much I do not bother sharing or talking about because - for me talking has never solved any...
    Quanitta Quanitta 26-30, F 3 days ago

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    it's weird .. even though I've lived by myself with me and my dad for 14 years , until now I suddenly feel really lonely Maybe it's because I miss my friends form school since I'm...
    lonelybeast1346 lonelybeast1346 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 4

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    He's not my husband yet, we are getting married in October, but sometimes I wish we weren't. I'm so torn in my own mind I can't even think. Over the last few years, I've been...
    wantingtobehappy84 wantingtobehappy84 22-25, F 4 Responses Jul 11

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    Sometimes I can't help but feel like a failure and that I'm letting my dad down. All he talks about is how I wanted to go to Harvard, be a doctor, got straight A's. Part of me...
    WoundedDreamer WoundedDreamer 16-17, F 2 Responses Jul 14

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    This past year has been the hardest experience of my life. I went through a break up, my parents' divorce, and a transition from high school to college all in a span of 8 months...
    lifeinthecity lifeinthecity 16-17, F 6 Responses Jun 24

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    I grew up in an abusive household. I don't think any of my friends, not even my husband, really understand how it feels and how destructive having had an abusive childhood can do...
    downwardsunflower downwardsunflower 22-25 2 Responses Jun 25

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    I'm a teenager and I do things that "normal" teenagers do. I've been to parties, I've experimented but I also play sports, and I get good grades. I can carry a conversation with...
    findingmytrueself findingmytrueself 13-15, F 3 Responses Jun 29

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    My parents almost always make fun of me or my questions. They even avoid my questions then laugh because it's 'obvious'. It makes me cry - inside. I don't want them to see me cry...
    Silencieuxz Silencieuxz 13-15, F 5 Responses Jul 2

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    This is mainly because people don't want to talk about the big stuff. People just be scratchin' the surface of everything. Everything is superficial. Everywhere I go. And I sure am...
    nadsxo2 nadsxo2 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 14

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    When I was younger I was a very happy child. Always smiling, laughing and loving everything about life. Even though I am naturally an introvert and somewhat shy I loved being...
    elderflower4 elderflower4 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 15

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    For the past 8 years of my 'life' I have suffered with severe anxiety and depression. They say it's meant to get better, but every day just gets harder. I'm almost starting to feel...
    36chambers86 36chambers86 26-30, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    I moved back home after college and all my college friends stayed on the east coast and my high school friends moved away and the ones that are still here I feel I have grown up...
    SofaRose SofaRose 22-25, F 6 days ago

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    The second time I'm posting about the same experience. Last time I didn't receive any help or any feedback and I'm not doing this for that but I just feel like it would be nice if...
    PursuitofHappiness1 PursuitofHappiness1 16-17, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I feel like no one understands me. But for some reason, I feel like ghosts and spirits understand me. I feel like I can talk to and trust ghosts and spirits. I feel like I can't...
    Ambria101 Ambria101 22-25, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    My father raped me when I was 6-10. My brother saw and raped me when I was 6-12. My two sisters were told and asked if they want me too and they said yes and raped me from 6-12. My...
    gardengirl17 gardengirl17 22-25, F 4 Responses Jun 23

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    I have anxiety and am a huge hypo. Sometimes I think it's something else though. I fall asleep and feel like I'm being swallowed whole, I feel like I'm not going to wake up the...
    Wolloo Wolloo 18-21, F Jun 29

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    or someone. when i'm leaving home i always had this feelng of emptiness, something's not with me that i should had, something's missing and i kept thinking what it is or is it...
    lachrymosejessa lachrymosejessa 13-15, F Jul 4

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    Okay so today.... Let me first say that I work in a retail store. I work in the shoe department and I'm the only one in this shoe department, which sometimes isn't the best, like...
    daisymetcalf daisymetcalf 22-25, F Jul 5

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    I can't fight this feeling anymore.sometimes i feel like i wanna tell her how i feel,but i know she won't feel the same.at the same time i don't want to freak her out.but this...
    urbanmellow urbanmellow 22-25, F Jul 8

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    Why does my family hate me so much? Ever since my nephew was born they completely forgot about me they just don't care anymore they favour him like they did me now i don't even get...
    otakugamerwolf otakugamerwolf 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 8

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    Like, everything is crap. Worthless ****. Nothing.. And that I can go on no more. But i been there, and I dont want to go there again. I read many books over my time now... Much...
    mirkwood86 mirkwood86 26-30, M Jul 11

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    I'm so tired of loving people who only toss me crumbs. My H loves me in a lukewarm, old-man kind of way - but there's no passion in it. We haven't had sex since March. My...
    TheTruthIfItKillsMe TheTruthIfItKillsMe 46-50, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I finally feel like life is going the right direction, and slam, hit in the head by a curve ball. I wasn't wearing a helmet. So I'm picking myself up, dusting myself off and...
    LoveEntangled LoveEntangled 41-45, F 2 days ago

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    Increasingly I am feeling like I was born with a mask on my face... I mean, here I am, this 39 year old lady with a wealth of experience, I speak several languages, am well...
    Hhaawke Hhaawke 36-40, F 1 day ago

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    I am constantly worried that I annoy the people around me all the time and theyre just to nice or scared to say anything. I know with some people it's not the case and I realize...
    WhirlwindR WhirlwindR 18-21, M 7 Responses Jun 26

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    It’s as if I came to live with a friend 18 months ago and I have long since worn out my welcome; now everyone is wondering when I’ll finally find my own place and leave them to...
    annadee annadee 41-45, F Jul 3

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