Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Sometimes Want to Have An Eating Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 130 People

    Sometimes I Try To Be Anorexic

    I sometimes want to have full blown anorexia so that I can focus on anorexia all the time instead of me focusing on things in my past like this one guy. When I focus on not eating and feeling the hunger pains, I can escape reality for a bit. And if I am in a really bad stage of...
    reset reset 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 23, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It Comes and It Goes

    i'm 20 years old, 5'7" and around 140 lbs. (although that's an estimate because i really don't weigh myself) sometimes i feel pretty good about my body, and i'm happy with it. other times though, i look in the mirror and i'm like, "you are too fat!" i used to be...
    runnagirrl runnagirrl 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 3, 2008

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Kno Iz Stupid...

    i kno iz stupid but evrytime my parents start telling meh  **** i just imagine wat they wud do if i started starving myself....
    iluvnerds12 iluvnerds12 13-15, F 2 Responses Mar 7, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Don't Have the Will Power

    I am 20 now...  and since I was about 17, I have had a few little month or so spells where I will eat literally nothing but maybe a granola bar a day.  I will lose 15 pounds or so...  But then I get happy with the way I look, satisfied... and I...
    pinkkennel pinkkennel 18-21 1 Response Mar 29, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Do I Have An Eating Disorder?

    I'm really not sure. In school I wouldn't eat anything, but then I would get home and eat a little bit of everything. I would kind of feel bad about it because I really hated my thighs, and I wanted to have stick legs like every other girl at school. I went through something...
    LeniGail LeniGail 13-15, F 3 Responses Jun 6, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Real Bad Sometimes

    I am 5'2" and I weigh about 155.  I have hypothyroidism so I gain weight really easily and have a horrible time losing becusae dieting just makes me sleepy.  It seems like I could lose if i could be anorexic, nervous like they are so I would be awake and obsessive...
    alisheaskylar alisheaskylar 26-30, F Aug 12, 2008

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Eating Disorders.

    I've been chubby ever since I can remember. I was never one to blame my weight on anything medical. But 2 years ago, I was diagnosed with Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome and a year prior to that I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism. My doctors and I came to the conclusion that these...
    collision collision 18-21, F 6 Responses Nov 29, 2007

    Your Response

    Cancel

    "Its No Big Deal."

    Here's the thing. I love to eat but hate it at the same time. Someone once told me that they feel like a failure when they eat and i feel the exact same way! I find it so difficult to not eat. And yet difficult TO eat. I am over weight, however much i deny it. I'm 5'3 and about...
    Isabellesheart Isabellesheart 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 8, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Hate My Eating Disorder!

    I saw this and felt really sad. I've had anorexia and bulimia for almost a year and trust me you don't want it. I'm still recovering so I'm not so full of knowledge onn an eating disorder. You loose your period, have no boobs, get tired really easily,I looked like a 9 year old...
    SaraC09 SaraC09 13-15, F 2 Responses Aug 12, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    *gasp* How'd That Finger End Up Down My Throat?...

    Sometimes I think it would just be sooooo much easier to just make myself puke instead of hating myself for being fat. I've done some eating disorder-ish things before. I've starved myself for a week here and there, I've eaten next to nothing for a couple months, I've taken...
    Warmthoughtsofyou04 Warmthoughtsofyou04 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 7, 2008

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Wimp

    I tried to throw up but I chickened out. I'm really disappointed with myself right now...
    LeniGail LeniGail 13-15, F 1 Response Jun 6, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    As Horrible As That Is To Say

    I'm fat. Against my will.Because of an endocrine disorder I have, my body is under the impression that I am in a condition of famine. Therefore- I gain weight SUPER easily no matter how healthy I eat, and if I starve myself, my body holds tight to the existing fat I carry. I am...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 6 Responses Jun 6, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It Sounds Weird..

    I really hate eating sometimes.. I just feel like I'm putting on loads of weight there and then. I do love food.. but sometimes I wish I wasn't so greedy. Most of the time I eat it's because I just feel like it not because I'm hungry. Recently I have basically lost my appetite...
    BrokenAngelWishes BrokenAngelWishes 18-21, F Nov 9, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm still in recovery

    and I relapsed a few times already about a week ago I think. Sometimes I want to be fully recovered and other times I never want to end my ednos. School is coming up soon and I already know what that means...at school I always skip lunch, always, and it's very rare that I eat...
    XxBadXVibesxX XxBadXVibesxX 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 30

    Your Response

    Cancel

    ??

    sometimes i would rather go through a eating disorder than to be called and look and feel fat . this extra 30lbs sucks . i wonder how fast i could lose 30lbs by puking ??
    bandgeek2 bandgeek2 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 18, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Im Recovered And Miss It

    ive recovered (some say you never stop recovering) from EDNOS. started at 13 ended at 16. i miss it. i miss not being able to eat; i miss seeing fat in the mirror. i miss not feeling the need to eat, the absolute anger at my body. i started college and am living in residence...
    abittobright abittobright 18-21, F Oct 16, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Obsessed

    I am obsessed with eating disorders. I love anything relating to ana, mia, or obese people. I have the movie/documentary "Thin" and I watch it all the time. Anything that has to do with models I love. I even watch discovery health on obese people to see what they go through.
    chelsia1 chelsia1 26-30, F 6 Responses Jan 8, 2008

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Are You Kidding Me?!!!

    Eating disorders suck major nuts. I'm fat. Really, I am. Supa chubby. And I struggle with Bulimia and Anorexic tendencies. Before this, I used to be a binge eater. So I go through binge cycles without "getting rid" of the food. I did lose some weight by starving. I mantain my way...
    CrazyHippieChick CrazyHippieChick 22-25, F 2 Responses May 30, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Related Experiences

    I've been taking a class in my college that recently the topic of eating disorders came up. Now at first I felt like staying out of the conversation because I couldn't figure out...
    cookii cookii 18-21, F Oct 9

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I don't know exactly what kind of disorder I have. Or if you can even call it that. Sometimes I have it and other times I can block it all out. But it always comes crawling back. I...
    candellightloveletters candellightloveletters 18-21, F Sep 26

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have been diagnosed with bulimia. My school found me skiving my lesson in one of the toilets and binge eating and then throwing back up afterwards. They informed my parents and...
    annonymususer15 annonymususer15 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 5

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I secretly suffer from bulimia, i am not skinny or average weight I am over weight and I'm not stupid, I know that having an eating disorder is horrible. I know that I should...
    falloutsarah falloutsarah 13-15, F Sep 28

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Yes :(( and when I get a comment about me eating I get more upset 'oh that's low fat..' I hates it because I had to stop dieting and I'm almost in my ideal weight goal and I had to...
    nonichecliche nonichecliche 18-21, F Oct 11

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I start my first day in an eating disorder treatment tmw. I really want to be okay with myself
    tokitten tokitten 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 8

    Your Response

    Cancel
    My eating disorder is relapsing. I know this because I've become so much more obsessive about food and calories, and I purged for the first time in a year last week. Also I'm...
    lalaloopsytrollpony lalaloopsytrollpony 18-21, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    How do I tell my friends and loved ones that I have Schizoaffective disorder?
    ParanoidGirl ParanoidGirl 26-30 2 Responses Oct 5

    Your Response

    Cancel
    At first it started out by eating too much and then throwing up because it was uncomfortable. I thought it was my body's way of saying I was too fat and needed to be bulimic. Life...
    heatherrrbee heatherrrbee 22-25, F 6 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I am 17 years old - 18 in November - and I have struggled with my weight and wanting to lose weight since I was 15 years old. I've been told many times that I do the things I do...
    kaylxlynn kaylxlynn 16-17, F 1 Response 3 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I used to be skinny could eat whatever I wanted to without gaining weight then got on this medication that changed it all.... I got so fat and that wasn't me at all. it went up and...
    elyayamama elyayamama 22-25, F 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    It all started the second semester of my Senior Year in high school. To say my anxiety started then would be a terrible lie, but that's when it spiraled to a point I could no...
    Honeydip521 Honeydip521 18-21, F 3 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    And its a horrible thing for me to have to admit to. Its been going on since high school grade 9 about. It started when I lost 10 pounds instantly after getting half my thyroid...
    Grrrrgirl Grrrrgirl 22-25, F Oct 8

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Maybe, just maybe I'm overcoming this...I'm wanting to eat more than I used to, but still struggling to get it down. And at the end of the day I feel terrible for eating and...
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 2 Responses Oct 6

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I've been perfectly fine for the last 1.5 years, but I think I'm going back to my old ways. It started with me being sick, I've last my appetite for the whole month afterwards, I...
    ChanelLove12 ChanelLove12 70+, F 1 Response 21 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have all 3:/ and I stopped myself from starving, binging, and purging about two months ago and I was doing well and my body image was getting better..until tonight. I was eating...
    XxBadXVibesxX XxBadXVibesxX 13-15, F 1 Response Sep 26

    Your Response

    Cancel
    i used to be really skinny, but now im so fat and cant stop eating im so depressed
    alm2511 alm2511 16-17 1 Response Sep 28

    Your Response

    Cancel
    This is such bullshit. I know food is important for me , but it feels like the enemy. I know food nourishes people but i feel so disgusting after eating it. I know food is a normal...
    LeilaOlivia LeilaOlivia 13-15, F Oct 7

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I hate this disorder with all of the scrapes of passion I have left in me. I've lost 90 pounds but I still perceive myself the same way I did when I was obese. I have a split down...
    punicorn1 punicorn1 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 12

    Your Response

    Cancel
    frustrated. been eating one salad a day before fasted for two days which ended today, while taking new meds and no weight loss. i can't take this shyt.
    arewehuman arewehuman 22-25, F 1 Response 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Relapsing bad these past few days. My insurance isn't covering my day treatment anymore because I need more help than they're providing. Not sure what my next step is going to be...
    misanthropemeow misanthropemeow 22-25, F 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    For me, it has been going on for several years. I'm just growing more angry, stressed, and depressed as this goes on. I do it as some form of punishment, I love the pain... I...
    Aliviah Aliviah 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 7

    Your Response

    Cancel
    My best friend is threatening to leave me because he's so worried about my anorexia and I don't know what to do because I can't eat but I don't want to lose him
    turntherecordover turntherecordover 18-21, F Oct 4

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Yup. Want to look like her though!
    Tigerlily53 Tigerlily53 18-21, F 3 Responses Oct 7

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I became controlled by my partner, an had no control over my life. So I decided to control my weight an lost so much I ended up in hospital, a few years ago an had a mini hart...
    10hayleigh85 10hayleigh85 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Just found out by accident that I am WEIGHT RESTORED!!! I'm so excited you guys! They've been doing blind weights on me which has been kinda stressful because I actually want to...
    misanthropemeow misanthropemeow 22-25, F 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I want a girl to talk to that understands.
    KyleeNichole94 KyleeNichole94 18-21, F 1 Response 3 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    'Ana' buddies? Not going to give tips or aid in weight loss, glorify whatever ED you have or anything of the like. I just want someone to speak with who i can empathize with and...
    CanisCanem CanisCanem 18-21, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    My friend and I went to mcdonalds... First of all I just wanted two small hamburgers... That's it... Instead he decides to buy me 3 mcdoubles.... A Large fries and a large drink...
    MrCutBleedSmile MrCutBleedSmile 18-21, M 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Down another 5 pounds...don't have much more loose
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F Sep 24

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I'm so sorry. I was gaining and loving it for about 6 days I think I gained about 4 pounds, and I was already loosing muscle but then my dad, starts verbally abusing me about it...
    Fatteristheshit Fatteristheshit 18-21, F 7 Responses Sep 27

    Your Response

    Cancel