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I Struggle With Bipolar 1

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 32 People

    I am in a mixed state of mania

    and depression today. Actually the last few days. My doctor said it's bc of my ptsd acting up. It makes my mood change second to second. And my "other one" is fighting to come out. I feel like I'm going crazy!!
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Mar 28

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    Up Up Up Then Down Down Down

    Depression has been a part of my life as long as I can remember.  It plagued me as a child, teen, young adult then into adulthood.  Treated for depression since I was in my twenties I didn't recognized the up side of the disorder.  Needless to say I didn't go to the doctor...
    rubyetuesday rubyetuesday 56-60, F 2 Responses Apr 4, 2012

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    I Don't Stuggle!

    Yes, I am diagnosed with Bipolar Depressed Severe with Psychotic Features anf add to this Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Acute Anxiety/Panic Disorder, and it all makes for an interesting day every day. Once you reach my age - 50 years- you start to get a bit wiser and...
    KrazyAuntKim KrazyAuntKim 46-50, F 1 Response Jan 6, 2013

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    A Glimpse...

    You feel the energy pulsing through you. It throbs through every cell of your body. Your nerves are on fire, completely inflamed and outstretched, receptive to every whisper, any twitch of motion near you. Touch is so amplified. A pat becomes a slap, a light grasp a clutch, a...
    m2extreme m2extreme 31-35, F 14 Responses Jun 22, 2011

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    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Mar 19

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    Memories

    I'm beginning to see medication as a reasonable alternative to my moods, but is this really right? Is this ridiculousness medication withdrawal (I've been off of Abilify for over a month) or am I really this rapid cycling? There's a maximum of one day at a normal mood between my...
    InvincibleHelpless InvincibleHelpless 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 26, 2012

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    Bipolar And Relationships.

    I think of the stigma associated with mental problems and depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and related conditions. The seemingly automatic, there’s-something-wrong-with-you kind of judgement. I think of myself and why I never quite felt right...
    Trancefreak Trancefreak 22-25, F 7 Responses Nov 15, 2009

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    My Head Won't Leave My Head Alone

    I was diagnosed with OCD when I was 17.  For years that's all I thought I had.  When I was 29 I was diagnosed with Bipolar 1 Disorder after almost accidentally killing myself with a mixture of vodka, valium, and Vicodin ES.  I had no intention of hurting myself but...
    silk123 silk123 31-35 1 Response Feb 7, 2008

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    Years Past And Years To Come

    You suddenly realize that people have roots and the world is lit up in the brightest of colours you are thinking clearer than everyone elsebutyourthoughtsflashbysoquicklylikesurrealistpoetryfishglue. And now you're laughing. Are you high? You get asked. Are you on drugs. You...
    InvincibleHelpless InvincibleHelpless 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 4, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    I've struggled with self harm since about 7th grade. I am now in 10th. I have not cut since January 28, 2014 but I still struggle with other types of self harm. I binge, perge, and...
    ForeverLostPoet ForeverLostPoet 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 3

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    I'm done. I'm sick with all the negativity. I'm turning 17 in a few weeks and for once I want to control this body image im struggling. I'm 5'5 and weigh around 160 pounds (or...
    burningdesir3 burningdesir3 16-17, F 3 Responses Jul 12

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    Tomorrow I am going to my friends sisters bridal shower. My friend told me to wear a dress and if I wanted to wear one of hers I could. I hate when she says I should wear her...
    Lipsofred Lipsofred 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I have just become a farther to a beautiful girl. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for a long time, I wonder how I can be a farther when I hate myself. I would really...
    headerz headerz 36-40, M 2 Responses Jun 29

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    I struggle with my body image everyday, but nobody can tell. I walk around like I have high self-esteem because I refuse to let people see me down. In reality, I hate the way my...
    XxMarxX XxMarxX 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 5

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    I do not romanticize self harm, or believe it to be good. This is just my experience with it. I've never been a "hard-core" self harmer, but it's still an addiction that I...
    terribletaytor terribletaytor 18-21, F Jul 13

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    I've struggled with my weight for most of my life. Looking back though I really wasn't that bad, but in my mind I was disgustingly & impossibly overweight. Rather than feeling...
    dukelostboy25 dukelostboy25 26-30, M 2 Responses Jul 13

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    I wouldn't say I'm ugly, but I don't think I am pretty. Id say im cute at most but not pretty and certainly not "hot". I've struggled with my weight my whole life and I've recently...
    adimarie adimarie 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    At times I struggle with rejection and other times I feel almost immune to it. My hubby and I have been married for almost ten years and have been together 12. He rejects me...
    1SweetL 1SweetL 36-40, F 43 Responses Jun 25

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    I'm torn. I'm torn about accepting the mental illness labels doctors have diagnosed me with, such as having bipolar and depression, because I don't want the labels to define me...
    JadedDivinity JadedDivinity 18-21, F 3 Responses Jul 15

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    I Love Somebody Who Has Bipolar Disorder Nineteen years ago - at about this time of the year - my brother made a suicide attempt. Thank all the gods, he had second thoughts and...
    SmartKat SmartKat 46-50, F 2 Responses Jul 1

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    I'm a miserable contribution to the human species. It's as simple as that. I suffer from deep depression and I sometimes seem like I have bipolar depression, but i'm not diagnosed...
    DejectedJoe DejectedJoe 16-17, M 1 Response Jul 11

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    This is a response I wrote to an anorexic woman. I'm bipolar, but I've talked to enough people with other kinds of mental illnesses to see we have a lot in common. I wrote this to...
    wundayatta wundayatta 56-60, M Jul 13

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    I am struggling harder now with body image than I ever have in my entire life, to the point that I sometimes can't look people straight in the eye because I'm so convinced others...
    TryingToFeelGoodAboutMyself TryingToFeelGoodAboutMyself 36-40, F 2 Responses Jul 11

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    Since I was 12, ( I am now 15) I have had a larger labia then everyone I know. I struggle to even feel confident enough to wear a bikini ( I'm a fairly thin girl). I don't ever let...
    lollipopsnliquor lollipopsnliquor 13-15, F 5 Responses Jul 3

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    Here I am again being dragged back in to the darkness, that evil inside me trying to push its way to the surface but I am fighting with all I have to push it back in to stay near...
    Gentleandlovingsoul Gentleandlovingsoul 36-40, F Jun 29

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    I have had panic attacks for as long as I can remember. A few years ago my doctor prescribed Ativan to quell the anxiety. I took them with no problem until earlier this year. They...
    stl2nite stl2nite 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 25

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    When I was little my mum used to give me drugs dunno why she just made me use them and after growing up with abuse and violence I started doing them a lot as a young teen and I'm...
    tomjimmy tomjimmy 16-17, M 3 Responses Jun 25

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    Why do every person I care about always leave me...I've only had 1 real relationship in my life before. The very first one last almost 3 years. We broke up after I moved back home...
    Sorasai Sorasai 22-25, F 5 Responses Jun 26

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    I used to be the absolute worst with this. Though I have been completely faithful for over three years now, I can't help but desire just to meet new people...but that turns into...
    Allibecca Allibecca 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 26

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    I cannot look in the mirror without listing all my flaws. I can't shake my feeling the rest of the day. I've turned cold, and even my medication isn't helping.
    OrionConst OrionConst 18-21, M Jun 28

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    When my mum died my brother wanted to be the hero, he even tried to stop me going to her funeral and his lucky i did't whack him on the day because he hurt me more than anyone...
    Gentleandlovingsoul Gentleandlovingsoul 36-40, F 1 Response Jun 29

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    "Sometimes being drug free, has less to do with addiction, and more to do with sanity." ~To This Day, Shane Koyczan
    sumthinoriginal sumthinoriginal 16-17, F Jun 30

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    I'm a Bisexual male. I find that I see beautiful men a lot but my mind goes through stages. First I notice how gorgeous they look and how composed they are. Second I hope to meet...
    Shiznitone Shiznitone 18-21, M 2 Responses Jun 30

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    I'm trying to learn how to love myself as a person. I am having such a difficult time with this.. I just turned 29 and feel 50. I have three beautiful children who mean the world...
    greeneyedmomma greeneyedmomma 26-30, F 4 Responses Jun 30

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    well after my depression my weight has dropped from around 100 kg's to the range of 75-77 kg's and I kept that weight for about 2 years, knowing that I couldn't go to the gym...
    LoneDovahKiin LoneDovahKiin 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 2

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    At my best I'd like to think that I'm charismatic, a good friend, funny, with resolve. But lately it's so hard to control my temper after dating a sociopath and other things that...
    Kimbahbay Kimbahbay 16-17, F Jul 4

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    I hate everything about the way I look. I've never told anymore in person, but it kills me to see other people so happy. It makes me do terrible things to myself. All my pimples...
    NPkid97 NPkid97 16-17, M 3 Responses Jul 5

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    ^ This, this picture here is a prime example of how some people are towards others with hearing loss. Usually the way they say it varies but it always means the same damn thing...
    NaturallyPeculiar NaturallyPeculiar 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 6

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    I am on methadone. I've been on the same dose for a few years. I am beginning to have problems with it. Withdrawal feelings. The doc raised my dose 5 mills but it doesn't seemed to...
    bellaboo68 bellaboo68 36-40, F 1 Response Jul 7

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    I'm writing this post to help people whom are struggling with there body image, specifically skin wise eg: acne ect ( I am one myself😉) . I recently discovered an AMAZING DIY...
    EmmaSheppard EmmaSheppard 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 7

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    Im 110 lbs now, i need to lose 10. Thats what happens when your roomate makes a huge *** cake in a house with only vegetables and fruit in it :/
    EffyXOXO EffyXOXO 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 11

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    I haven't cut for almost a year now because I learned that I am perfect the way I am. But I used to cut all the time a few years back. I still have scars but I show them off with...
    SamLGirl SamLGirl 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 12

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    Im 15 and have been struggling with an eating disorder for three years , i don't know how to tell my mom :(
    LeilaOlivia LeilaOlivia 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 12

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    I am 13 years old and I never use to like the way I look at school people would always call me fat and ugly and I would tell my self you are beautiful don't let those comments...
    ChaceMarie ChaceMarie 13-15, F 3 Responses Jul 13

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    I wish I can be how I wish I was before I had two children it all jus happen so fast feel so uncomfortable with my body don't feel good dont look good to the point that I feel not...
    precious805 precious805 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 13

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    Its so easy to turn to alcohol when life gets too rough ... It's only a temporary solution but once that stage is done then u wake up with a mean hangover an full of regret from...
    ev23 ev23 31-35, F 3 Responses Jul 14

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    I honestly am not content with my body. I think partially because of sexual abuse and partially because of bullying. I used to try to starve myself but then I would get so hungry...
    Xander8905 Xander8905 18-21, M 2 Responses Jul 16

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    I have hated my body since I could remember and I have been suffering with an ed for three or more years. I don't think I'll ever like myself.
    Skinnieminnie91 Skinnieminnie91 13-15, F a week ago