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I Struggled With Anorexia and Bulimia

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 486 People

    I Want To Be Perfect

      I’m never enough for you, I try my best and I fail miserably.  My best will never be enough, no matter how hard I try.  And as I stand with arm wrapped around my stomach, the other extended upwards to my mouth, two fingers ready to work, I think of...
    lehu349 lehu349
    13-15, F
    Mar 9, 2010

    8 Years Recovered! :)

    I struggled with eating disorders since the age of 11. At the age of 21 I was admitted to the River Centre Clinic in Northwest Ohio. I had hit rock job, no friends, not in school, no motivation, no future. All I had was my eating disorder. When I was admitted, I...
    meggierenee meggierenee
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Dec 17, 2012

    I have recovered from anorexia

    and am at a normal weight now. Pro ana sites are horrible, please nobody ever go on them.
    crazyraindances crazyraindances
    18-21, F
    1 Response Nov 2, 2014

    Basically, an ED sometimes I can't eat at all,

    or I starve myself but if not I have to throw up. I'm doing it even after drinking something sweet. It all got out of control. My body hates me for that, I feel bad all the time and it's killing me. I don't know what to do, but I want to be thinner, all the time-like that could...
    Iamscaredtodream Iamscaredtodream
    18-21, F
    Aug 12, 2015

    Bulimia A Gift?

    I’m grateful for my bulimia, i could think. It seems, after 17 years of it, it is like smoking, as far as addictions go. I’ll let it go completely, then it comes out of no where... other times it comes back full force. I think its mission is to keep me grounded and in...
    anadas anadas
    3 Responses Jul 22, 2013

    I purged the 3rd time yesterday.

    .. Before I was only restricted type. Than I started to exercise and also chew and spit and finally also purge... I'm forced to eat and need to put on weight... Otherwise they may send me to a treatment center... I feel guilty and ashamed... Nobody understands me... Nobody can...
    fatuglyduckling fatuglyduckling
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 25, 2014

    I've struggled with restrictive type bulimia.

    I still struggle sometimes, but I constantly think about my weight. I cant get past it
    SuicidalTeen16 SuicidalTeen16
    18-21, F
    Jan 21, 2016

    Growing Up With Anorexia And Bulimia

    I woke up and marched to the bathroom. I peed, took off my clothes, my watch, and stepped on the scale. I was nervous even though I did it six times a day. I looked at the scale like one looks to god when she prays and read the number: 92 pounds. This would have been normal if...
    Lisabel Lisabel
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Mar 7, 2010

    My Story.

    I guess I will just start from the beginning. I think it started in year 4. I dont have much memories from my childhood, but I can remember I started throwing my lunches in the bin. I was positive people where watching me, were judging me, where thinking that I shouldnt be eating...
    princesskairi princesskairi
    18-21, F
    Nov 13, 2012

    I started competitive swimming

    when I was ten years old. My fitness levels escalated quickly and I soon became one of the most athletic students in my grade. Swimming became a great joy of mine and racing and going to meets was a thrill. Eleven years old and I was confident, doing well academically...
    laurenkirishima laurenkirishima
    18-21, F
    Nov 16, 2015

    I've always had the disease,

    but it became obvious a couple of months ago. I couldn't eat without being physically sick afterwards. I had lost half a stone in 3 weeks. I am 5ft 1, and I weigh 6st. It's a horrible cycle that is impossible to escape from.
    ameliap ameliap
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 29, 2013

    trigger warning (just in case) hi,

    i read online a lovely beautiful quote "son asks, mummy why are u so squishy and cuddly, she replies because im happy" this reminds me of when eating was not ever a pleasure, that when i got to age of fifteen, when i left home, where eating was my choice i could not acknowledge...
    Pennycaca Pennycaca
    41-45, F
    Apr 13, 2015

    Hence why the experience title has "struggled"

    meaning past tense.. Having an eating disorder is very difficult, at least for me it was. There were days i would just randomly become dizzy and feeling no strength to do anything something as simple as opening a water bottle, I physically could not do it. And to me that was...
    MichellexxLevine314 MichellexxLevine314
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Dec 9, 2014

    I know it's unhealthy

    and I shouldn't do or try it, so please don't tell me that! But I have tried making myself puke at least 15 times and it never works! How can I help myself puke? What can I do?
    skysplits skysplits
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Sep 23, 2014

    Throughout my younger teenage years I dealt

    with bulimia really bad. I had no idea what to do with my life anymore, I didn't want that for myself, I didn't want to be that way, no one else was so why was I? I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep and I found it incredibly hard to talk to anyone until my mum sent me to a...
    bxttlebxrn bxttlebxrn
    18-21, F
    Apr 6, 2014

    I've lost so much weight I went from 160 to 129

    and I still feel so fat my self esteem is at an all time low....
    krodz13 krodz13
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jun 26, 2014

    The Monster Within

    Bulimia is a monster Bulimia will steal your pride, self worth, and sense of self. A snake in the grass ready to strike. An addiction of the worst kind. Everyday you have a choice. Everyday you can choose to fight. You are fighting for you. You are fighting for what you...
    empemp26 empemp26
    31-35, F
    Sep 15, 2013

    Secrets Be Secrets No More

    so i have bulimia there you go it is a real love hate relationship as I'm sure most bulimics would know or just Eating Disorder suffers in general It look a long time to over come that shame to run and spread its wings to send it out to the world like a dove inner peace...
    brittstaXD brittstaXD
    22-25, F
    Aug 21, 2013

    Not skinny enough ana is everything.

    .to me now..ana helps I've always wanted to be perfect so I will be if i lose a couple of pound.. 200 calories a day or less I only want to lose a couple and I'll feel perfect.
    butterflieana butterflieana
    16-17, F
    Jan 20, 2015

    I've struggled with various eating disorders

    since being bullied at 11 years old, but the anorexia vs bulimia was the worst. I never lost or gained enough weight for anybody to realise anything was wrong. I probably fitted more into the EDNOS category, but I had symptoms of both. I used to think I was fat. I remember one...
    22-25, F
    Mar 31, 2014

    ok, not with bulimia thankfully.

    ..but with anorexia in a very serious, I still hate myself for this, hate how much trouble I caused to my family...My parents deserve eternal respect for their stoicism...if I had a 14-year old kid who is needlessly dieting to the point of starvation, fainting, and...
    AmarieOfTheVanyar AmarieOfTheVanyar
    22-25, F
    Jul 20, 2015

    83 pounds and I still suck in my stomach

    for pictures . I really need to lose weight 😒
    Piercedprincess17 Piercedprincess17
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jul 1, 2014

    I'm recovered since May,

    16th 2014. It's recent, but I'm proud of myself. This expérience had changed me a lot. Now I accept who I am, I am more self-confident. It was a hard step, but it allowed me to grew-up
    MechanteMargot MechanteMargot
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jun 1, 2014

    Please keep strong. It gets better.

    It gets easier. Just stay strong. I'm here for you all.
    Chelsea56 Chelsea56
    18-21, F
    Jan 13, 2014

    when people get a cold

    or a virus it's easy to see that they are unwell. when you don't eat anything though people just presume it's because of a choice. not a lot of people look at it like an illness to. illnesses are not just physical but mental as well. i mean sure at first it may have been a...
    deleted deleted
    6 Responses Apr 20, 2014

    I’m in big big panic… I gained weight.

    Didn’t weight me on the scale since 2 weeks however today even my pants were fitting (34 slim cut) which were really lose at my belly. Not anymore… My Dr. was very strict and warned me he might admit me to the hospital and that I need to gain weight (1 kg per week), no...
    fatuglyduckling fatuglyduckling
    22-25, F
    Dec 8, 2014

    I Got Through It

     I was a ballerina in high school.  In ballet, the pressure to be pretty and perfect and THIN is ten times worse than the normal pressure of high school.  I never felt good enough because I wasn't pretty enough, wasn't talented enough, wasn't THIN enough. So I...
    ksiezniczka ksiezniczka
    18-21, F
    1 Response Oct 20, 2009

    I did in 7th grade .

    and sometime still do . people call me fat nd I get pissed off I rather not eat nd throw up . now I'm exersizing . but I fainted at school sand I told my mom I didn't want to eat cause I didn't feel like it . it scared me and I hated it . and I acutlly didn't make me loose...
    veroisme veroisme
    16-17, F
    Mar 9, 2014

    I never actually succeeded

    but I have tried bulimia many times! I don't understand why it never works! I mean I know I have a bad gagging reflex but how bad can it actually be?
    skysplits skysplits
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Aug 13, 2014

    Ana Is Back...

    Ana is back. I haven't been eating for a while now. I am dropping weight faster than the easter bunny drops eggs. I eat 300 calories a day, and I am addicted. I count calories constantly, measure my waist, throw up, run, work out...everything. Ana is short for Anorexia. I have...
    NotTheAmericanAveragexx NotTheAmericanAveragexx
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Oct 15, 2013

    When I was growing up,

    my view on beauty was different. I remember going online and talking to people. There was this one boy whom I was falling for he asked me my weight. I was 5'2 and 120 pounds. He said " are you fat? i dont want a fat girlfriend. no one does." That's how it started. Society...
    chunkyislandgirl54 chunkyislandgirl54
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jan 12, 2015

    Hunger Birds

    I have always had self image problems.. And always hating how i look.. I never felt in control of myself mostly on the outside of my body.. i was called fat all the time at school.. and one day there was a girl at school who was walking home with me and told me a good way to lose...
    HeartAndWings HeartAndWings
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jan 28, 2013

    I'm actually still struggling & i'm on the road

    to recovery *points into direction of recovery fearlessly* Starting at my next appointment, i will be given medication to help me gain weight. & i'm going to put myself on a healthy diet, & i hope i don't relapse because i'm really feeling it this time!
    AnorexicHiddlestoner AnorexicHiddlestoner
    22-25, F
    May 17, 2014

    Lately, I've found it impossible to eat.

    And even when I do (because my roommates get suspicious), I have to go throw it up almost immediately. I've also been running miles and biking miles everyday. My throat has been so sore. I wish I knew how to make it stop hurting.
    RosieJay RosieJay
    22-25, F
    Sep 11, 2014

    Gonna do 500 cals tomorrow .

    . Tips for not bingo so i dont need to p,,u,,rge please ??
    Unstableteen Unstableteen
    16-17, F
    Sep 4, 2014

    I still struggle daily.

    ..and I am scared it's beating me..
    allisonbrookwhite allisonbrookwhite
    22-25, F
    1 Response Aug 13, 2014

    My Teenage Years

    all through my teenage years i struggled with the way i looked and my self esteem. that was when i started to starve myself, try to make myself throw up (never worked, i don't have a gag reflex apparently) and i hurt myself. my parents never recognised what was happening, i hid...
    dallasalmighty dallasalmighty
    22-25, F
    2 Responses May 31, 2013

    I Can Say Its The Past!

    I still remember that fateful day when I was only ten and some kids were laughing at me because of my size. I was not fat only chubby, but they made me feel like I was an enormous cow :( I was just a child and this had affected me greatly though I took time to acknowledge that...
    tryharder45 tryharder45
    13-15, F
    2 Responses Nov 5, 2012

    Binging,purging, starving,

    restricting. The one thing I know is that I will lose weight and work out starting tomorrow.
    NemoNoMore NemoNoMore
    18-21, F
    Apr 22, 2014

    every day after lunch i would wait

    for my parents to go to work so i could go in the bathroom and vomit.soon my parents noticed my weight so they knew something wasn't dad beat the **** out of me and since then i'm scared to do it again
    forkinyoureye forkinyoureye
    18-21, F
    1 Response Apr 7, 2015

    Bulimia Controls Me

    I know that some people may say that nothing's really wrong with me, because i'm struggling with this for 2 and a half weeks now, and it's really not that much. But i throw up every day, after every meal, if i have a chance. I don't eat that much, just normal portions. But food...
    mia3511 mia3511
    22-25, F
    Oct 15, 2013

    The urge is back. I thought I'd finally got

    over all this. I've just eaten some toast, and I want to purge. I have no idea why, this hasn't happened in a few months now..
    betruetoyourself14 betruetoyourself14
    16-17, F
    May 2, 2015

    I’m in big big panic… I gained weight.

    Didn’t weight me on the scale since 2 weeks however today even my pants were fitting (34 slim cut) which were really lose at my belly. Not anymore… My Dr. was very strict and warned me he might admit me to the hospital and that I need to gain weight (1 kg per week), no...
    fatuglyduckling fatuglyduckling
    22-25, F
    1 Response Dec 8, 2014

    I think I still do. When I have

    even a tiny bit of fat anywhere on my body, I don't eat every good. I give myself, on the first day, a 1,600 calorie diet. I'm 5.4in tall. My weight is between 120-130lbs. I have an hourglass figure. I already know, with my age, height, and figure I'm not supposed to be skin and...
    17paredkay00 17paredkay00
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Aug 29, 2014

    i use to had anorexi

    and bulimia now i have a binge eating and sometimes i.purge its that normal
    passamaya passamaya
    26-30, F
    Jun 4, 2015

    I feel like I've finally beat my anorexia.

    As of today I'm 5'6" 113 pounds, finally a normal weight. For once I don't look in the mirror and see the fat ugly girl I used to see. Hang in there. It gets better.
    pepperred17 pepperred17
    22-25, F
    Jan 25, 2014

    I feel like lately I've been slipping into my

    old habits. Like for two years I've been great but when I was 13 I was starving myself and I did eventually get myself to stop (with no help) and I was fine, I think I kind of scared myself when I passed out at school. But these last few days I've been feeling disgusted with...
    naysgirmonkeybutt naysgirmonkeybutt
    Feb 4, 2014 fat, let me tell you- (12 on Jan.

    22!) im 11,110 pounds,female and i dont feal hungery anymore,i didnt eat breakfast nor lunch today or yesterday (jan 12 2015) and today i forced myself to eat a salad....i know,im weird.... please reply to me....pretty pretty PLEASE!!!?????
    ilovecatsforever777 ilovecatsforever777
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jan 12, 2015
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