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I Survived Sexless Marriage and Divorce

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 29 People

    I Am Not Divorced Yet So

    I have known my husband for ten years. He comes from Sri Lanka and was raped by soildiers as a results the war. He has never told me this exactly, but I know enough to know why that he why doesn't want to have sex with me. I broke up with him twice, but we...
    elansdale elansdale 26-30, F 2 Responses Nov 1, 2009

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    Pointless Arguments

    Yes, the names have been changed to protect the innocent... Christopher was a high school romance. He was a dark, moody man who I saw as an insecure mess in need of unconditional love and support, and I knew I could change him, make him happy and secure. At the tender age of 18...
    bforpreader bforpreader 41-45, F 4 Responses Oct 30, 2009

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    I in a sexless divorce.

    I haven't dated since my divorce was finalized. Before actually.
    boadiccearose boadiccearose 51-55, F Mar 20

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    And the Light At the End of the Tunnel Is Not An Oncoming Train ....

    So here I am, about 16 months since I last wrote. It's been a long hard haul. The only real constants in my life have been my family and my beloved INTP friend. I have changed jobs twice, moved home three times and, surprising for me, cried bitter tears. I've even broken the...
    Joyspring Joyspring 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 26, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    I have started living a selfless life. My son only has me and my husband (as a father figure) with whome I have a sexless marriage. The rest of his immediate family hv passed away...
    Mamta123 Mamta123 41-45, F 3 Responses 44 mins ago

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    Before and After … Nearing 8 months after my separation, I reflect on the emotional desert I have called my marriage. During those years, I was starved for a smile or a hug. A...
    SleeplessKnight SleeplessKnight 41-45, M 11 Responses Apr 6

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    Psychology Today has a couple of recent articles regarding "Does Sexless marriage justify adultery". The articles are reasonable and informed and the comments worthwhile. They...
    hl42 hl42 51-55, M 8 Responses 2 days ago

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    Note from opposite land My post sexless marriage love and I debuted this weekend a skit about our romance. It was part of a cabaret show at the community theatre where we met...
    Mettamomma Mettamomma 61-65, F 6 Responses Mar 22

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    Update from Opposite Land Even though I normally have sex 3-4 times a week with my beloved post sexless marriage lover, I haven't had sex for a week. Why? He is sick with...
    Mettamomma Mettamomma 61-65, F 13 Responses Apr 10

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    Two weeks ago, I shared what I thought would be my current status for awhile. Life being what it is - it has thrown me into a crazy roller coaster loop once again. The good news...
    lightblueeyes lightblueeyes 46-50, F 21 Responses Mar 28

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    I asked for a divorce 2 months ago. He moved out 2 weeks ago. Divorce will be final in 6 months. I wrote all my stories in I live in a sexless marriage group. I have been a member...
    Cucly80 Cucly80 31-35, F 5 Responses Apr 2

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    I'm on my way out. We filed the papers to end our marriage yesterday, so in thirty to ninety days I will be single. It's a little sad. He and I both have said we never in a...
    couldbeheaven couldbeheaven 26-30, F 5 Responses Apr 1

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    Update: I was active on this site about 2 years ago. I read all the posts and despite the enormous body of experience laid out I still somehow thought I would be different. I...
    NeedingToVent NeedingToVent 36-40, F 12 Responses Mar 30

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    Here I am, Just like all of you husbands, sexless marriage, WTF, what to do about it. Who am I: been married for 20 years, one child, in college (Doing great !!). So now its a...
    Larsimages Larsimages 51-55, M 10 Responses Mar 25

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    A good friend of mine has started talking to me about his divorce last year in more detail and it turned out he was in a long time sexless marriage (and I believe his account of it...
    celtusa celtusa 46-50, M 11 Responses Apr 2

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    A year ago I found out that the reason for this is that my 'husband' is a sex addict and has been screwing hordes of other women and prostitutes. PUKE!!!! I find myself with three...
    shanm shanm 46-50, F 2 Responses Apr 9

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    Rules of Engagement - A few new members have posted in this forum recently, and while I've only been a member for few weeks, I thought I'd share my opinion on the purpose of this...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 15 Responses Mar 20

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    Make that, that I used to live in a marriage that was becoming a sexless marriage. Today would have been our second anniversary. The story is complicated, but to make it short, she...
    soundtrackforantarctica soundtrackforantarctica 26-30, M 8 Responses Mar 25

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    This is a little scary, posting about such private matters to people I've never met, but here goes. I googled sexless marriage for the first time today. What triggered it was the...
    TCKat TCKat 36-40, F 11 Responses Apr 10

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    It really does amaze me how many people are in a sexless marriage. I guess maybe because I'm an extremely sexual person, and my partner matches that, that I could never see myself...
    NYSlilAngel NYSlilAngel 26-30, F 3 Responses Mar 23

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    I had an incredible night. I have to share my experience. I was raised by my Grandmother, who lived in a sexless marriage. My Grandfather was a mean, cold, loveless husband. He...
    ifoundmehere ifoundmehere 41-45, F 11 Responses Mar 25

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    Remember the Peanuts cartoons where Charlie Brown tried and tried to kick the football held by Lucy? Charlie Brown would approach the ball, skeptical and questioning: "If I try to...
    indianoutlaw indianoutlaw 31-35, M 9 Responses Apr 2

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    Those who do not have to deal with this situation must find it odd that those of us who do, express such deep sadness and longing. How often do the comments suggested the simple...
    DumbLondoner DumbLondoner 51-55, M 18 Responses 6 days ago

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    What would you consider sexless marriage? no sex in 1 month? 1 year? 5 yrs? How can anyone survive a sexless marriage without cheating? Just curious as I didn't know so many people...
    wiredwolf wiredwolf 31-35, M 9 Responses 5 days ago

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    I stumbled across this song on YouTube. I'm a Natalie Merchant fan and was surprised I hadn't heard this song before. I've done some research about the meaning of the song. I read...
    greeneyedlady72 greeneyedlady72 41-45, F 9 Responses 2 days ago

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    You think you have all the time in the world. You don’t. I live in a sexless marriage. I made major decisions and made many choices to live alongside a man who found it...
    ifoundmehere ifoundmehere 41-45, F 26 Responses Mar 20

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    Another thing missing from this sexless marriage, besides intimacy, love and respect is fun and laughter. (Jeez, what exactly do I get from this marriage) I thought that I had...
    Gingersnapped Gingersnapped 51-55, F 13 Responses Mar 25

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    There are 2 whys in the sexless marriage. The first is: why does my spouse not want sex? This leads to a huge cycle of reason-chasing, smokescreening from the refuser, magical...
    hl42 hl42 51-55, M 8 Responses Mar 26

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    Well I lived in a sexless marriage for 9 years. About 14 months ago I left finally and an starting over. I tried everything I could to revive our marriage. From candle light...
    Leavinstevin Leavinstevin 41-45, M 21 Responses 4 days ago

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    Thank you to everyone who took the time to respond to my post yesterday. I was overwhelmed by the friendship and advice that you guys gave. As I think about the situation I am in...
    DumbLondoner DumbLondoner 51-55, M 10 Responses 4 days ago

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    Things are going great, why wouldn't they? I've completely dropped the intimacy topic in our marriage. I've started focusing on other parts of myself that I would like to change...
    gracehopepeace gracehopepeace 31-35, F 22 Responses Mar 22

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    Survey Says 1 In 5 Unhappily Married Women Are In A Sexless Marriage http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/21/marriage-infidelity-study_n_5009245.html
    LynxKitty LynxKitty 36-40, F 10 Responses Mar 23

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    My mother passed away peacefully on Monday, March 24, 2014. She had battled long and hard against the ravaging effects of years of smoking cigarettes. The last thing my mother...
    rosieapparition rosieapparition 51-55, F 28 Responses Mar 27

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    I have been together with my wife for 18 years and been married for 8 years soon. And the past 8 years there have been less and less sex. For now, no sex at all. All these years i...
    WhereIsHome WhereIsHome 36-40, M 16 Responses Apr 9

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    I am new here. I haven't participated in online discussions in years so this is quite awkward but I like the anonymity an could really use an ear. I will be married for five years...
    gardinel gardinel 36-40, F 12 Responses Apr 10

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    Well it's been a month and this may be a new record in our sexless marriage. I'm actually going to call it a intimacy-less marriage. Frustration is gone and realization has hit...
    BiHow BiHow 41-45, M 6 Responses Apr 11

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    I want to have an affair. My spouse cheated on me. I don't knw if cheating will make me feel better. I would however be having sex as I am already in a sexless marriage
    reasonseasonlifetime reasonseasonlifetime 26-30, F 10 Responses Mar 22

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    Stuff I Used To Think (but don't any more) In regard to sexless marriages, I once used to think that the complainant person - - was probably a hopelessly bad root - wasn't...
    bazzar bazzar 56-60, M 7 Responses Mar 24

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    Is there a sign in my forehead that says "Anyone want to f#ck me - going once, going twice?" I'm at a resort in Florida with one of my girlfriends enjoying the warm weather. I...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 31 Responses Mar 24

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    I can't believe it. Over two years and a half years gone....And, let me tell you I have had more sex in these past two years then the twelve years of that relationship combined...
    rosedl rosedl 41-45, F Mar 26

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    I've been separated 6-months after being in a sexless marriage. I didn't stay in one place much during the separation. But after being overseas for a while (spent time in Australia...
    NeedingToVent NeedingToVent 36-40, F 5 Responses Mar 28

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    I wouldn't want to be in a sexless marriage, I'd make it a priority to have that alone time with my husband if I was to ever get married, especially with kids. & I sure as Hell...
    alizex7x alizex7x 18-21, F 8 Responses Apr 1

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    A quote worth pondering for those who are or have been in sexless marriages: ""It's one kind of victory to slay a beast, move a mountain, and cross a chasm, but it's another kind...
    Mettamomma Mettamomma 61-65, F Apr 2

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    Hip Hip Hooray! After 5 years of a hopeless sexless marriage I'm free! I am now dating again (:
    xobluebirdxo xobluebirdxo 31-35, F 4 Responses Apr 7

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    For anyone still on the fence bout getting out: I am much less lonely alone(as alone as you can be surrounded by a pack of dogs!) than I ever was while still living in my sexless...
    Solonely80 Solonely80 31-35, F 11 Responses Apr 9

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    I have been living in this sexless marriage for several years. I haven't had sex in about 8 or 9 months. My husband refuses to admit there is an issue. Well, I finally had sex but...
    nurse594 nurse594 41-45, F 19 Responses 4 days ago

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    I love that I found this app and people out there in sexless marriages. My husband has a ****/************ addiction which he sees a therapist for on a weekly basis but I just don...
    dmb8927 dmb8927 36-40, F 12 Responses 4 days ago

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    Anyone know of any sexless marriage conventions?
    SheldonJPlankton SheldonJPlankton 41-45, M 20 Responses 3 days ago

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    I have read many posts now, and I cannot claim to know what is the best route for others. I love my wife and I have amazing young kids, but our problem with sex goes back from...
    travelight travelight 41-45, M 5 hrs ago

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    I'm not married but I was engaged and I had to break it off it did hurt because I really loved him but I'm a sex addict and I thought I could change that and he wanted me to...
    June4U June4U 22-25, F 10 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    For Kids Sake.... As part of our divorce and the process both my stbx and my therapist suggested a seminar called For Kids Sake. I got quite a bit out of it myself. I attended...
    Usernametbd Usernametbd 36-40, M 7 Responses Mar 30

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