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I Survived Sexless Marriage and Divorce

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 32 People

    I in a sexless divorce.

    I haven't dated since my divorce was finalized. Before actually.
    boadiccearose boadiccearose 51-55, F Mar 20

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    And the Light At the End of the Tunnel Is Not An Oncoming Train ....

    So here I am, about 16 months since I last wrote. It's been a long hard haul. The only real constants in my life have been my family and my beloved INTP friend. I have changed jobs twice, moved home three times and, surprising for me, cried bitter tears. I've even broken the...
    Joyspring Joyspring 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 26, 2009

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    I Am Not Divorced Yet So

    I have known my husband for ten years. He comes from Sri Lanka and was raped by soildiers as a results the war. He has never told me this exactly, but I know enough to know why that he why doesn't want to have sex with me. I broke up with him twice, but we...
    elansdale elansdale 26-30, F 2 Responses Nov 1, 2009

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    Pointless Arguments

    Yes, the names have been changed to protect the innocent... Christopher was a high school romance. He was a dark, moody man who I saw as an insecure mess in need of unconditional love and support, and I knew I could change him, make him happy and secure. At the tender age of 18...
    bforpreader bforpreader 41-45, F 4 Responses Oct 30, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    The compromise promise. I ran into a former colleague yesterday. When I worked with him I got to know his wife and kids, and the couple seemed happily married, but got divorced a...
    something2talkabout something2talkabout 51-55, M 8 Responses 2 days ago

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    When I originally posted in April of 2011, I was living in a sexless marriage. I was confused, heartbroken and angry... What happened in the 3 years following has nearly destroyed...
    malms malms 51-55, F 1 Response Sep 8

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    I wanted to post and solicit some advice. I have been waiting for my wife to go our of town for a few weeks now. I was/am planning to see a divorce lawyer, one that specializes in...
    hoss350 hoss350 41-45, M 12 Responses 6 days ago

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    Well. It is finally official. I am divorced! After all the craziness, after years of sexless marriage and emotional distance, after emotional and physical abuse, after having an...
    unexpectedlove15 unexpectedlove15 26-30, F 9 Responses Aug 22

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    I live in a sexless marriage have been for the last 6 years... Just didn't realize I was until recently. In my situation i never married for love, didn't even find him attractive...
    Sobeit06 Sobeit06 36-40, F 5 Responses Aug 28

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    Is there any woman out there who lived in a sexless marriage and they were able to fix this problem? I just don't want to believe that my only option is divorce! WTF?
    Brownie27 Brownie27 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 25

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    I would like to get a divorce, but my sexless marriage is the part of my life that's going best. I hate my job and got warned recently that I am on the edge of losing it. I wish...
    Aubergine7 Aubergine7 36-40, F 17 Responses a week ago

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    I found an interesting study on sexlessness in The Journal of Sexual Medicine. I can't share the full pdf because there's no way to upload it here, but I will copy and paste the...
    RedOctagon RedOctagon 22-25, F 9 Responses Sep 2

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    I'm sure we all have read the story of the guy who emailed his wife a spreadsheet of his failed attempts at sexual advances. I've read more than a few articles on the story...
    chuckdaly chuckdaly 36-40, M 12 Responses Aug 22

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    Short comings, short sex drive, short of expressing love are all part of Sexless Marriage. Denial and refusal are very familiar. Pay attention to your spouse's messages. My s/m...
    musicinme musicinme 56-60, F 7 Responses Aug 19

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    Neglect - One of the most important things I've learned from my decision to end my sexless marriage is that I will never again tolerate being neglected by my partner. We all...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 11 Responses Aug 30

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    I had to choose a section, so I chose "I Live In a Sexless Marriage." Call it what it is. I denied it. True. If you do live in a sexless marriage, please tell me and if anyone...
    Avek Avek 61-65, F 4 Responses Sep 5

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    I've heard the technical definition of a sexless marriage is sex less than 10 times in a year. But what about quality? What about a partner who doesn't just roll over and tell you...
    frogchop frogchop 46-50, M 14 Responses a week ago

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    I am going to tell how trying to keep my husband in a sexless marriage turned into a terror. When my husband came back from the military his father and other wanted me to assist in...
    isis55 isis55 56-60, F 6 Responses 4 days ago

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    Bear with me because this may seem off topic, but it isn't. I've been recently thinking about death. Yesterday, my post sexless marriage lover had to put his beloved dog of 14...
    Mettamomma Mettamomma 61-65, F 13 Responses Aug 21

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    Today's Dear Prudence: " Dear Prudence, My wife hates sex. Over the years, her libido has gradually faded to nothing and she now finds even the thought of intercourse unpleasant...
    Mettamomma Mettamomma 61-65, F 19 Responses Sep 4

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    Does anyone else notice a sharp increase in people who are NOT in sexless marriages that are jumping in to tell us all what we are doing wrong? Is there a troll convention in town...
    ImBatmanNow ImBatmanNow 51-55, M 18 Responses Aug 22

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    A sexless marriage is like a gift you are not allowed to unwrap! What is the point of giving me a gift if I can't enjoy it?
    chasingdreamss83 chasingdreamss83 31-35, M 5 Responses Aug 23

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    Not necessarily a sexless marriage, but one lacking intimacy. I have sex often...not as much as I would like, but often. I think I'm an above average sexual guy, so I kind of...
    Thediary Thediary 26-30 8 Responses Aug 24

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    OK, so I don't actually have a totally a sexless marriage but here's my input & what we have that others don't have. Communication. We've been together for 20 years, married for 13...
    Xlandria61 Xlandria61 61-65, F 5 Responses Aug 26

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    I had a thought today. Has anyone tried to direct their refuser to EP? My wife and I each have our own laptops, she leaves hers around the house so it's easy to access. I was...
    LifeinWoodinville LifeinWoodinville 41-45, M 17 Responses Aug 30

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    I've been in a sexless marriage for most of 30 years. While it has always bothered me greatly it has gotten much worse the past year. For financial reasons, I can't see getting...
    beachguy1056 beachguy1056 56-60, M 7 Responses Sep 3

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    I my name is Ross Ian in sexless marriage situation . Ian married have kid's all of them out of home.lam married for 30e everything wasood until one day my wife disaided that we...
    kingofmassage kingofmassage 56-60, M Sep 3

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    I am trying to learn to cope in a sexless marriage, And was wondering if there are any other couples out there that would like to talk and relate with.
    ooomooo ooomooo 18-21, F 4 Responses Sep 3

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    I have noticed that many people living in a sexless marriage describe a sudden stop. Or that initially all was fine. Has anyone else been in a relationship where it started out...
    ICanBeMe ICanBeMe 46-50, M 17 Responses Sep 4

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    im in a sexless marriage And I need to talk with someone who can relate, and not judge me or my situation. because the random person would call a sex addict, but its not that.. I...
    ooomooo ooomooo 18-21, F 13 Responses Sep 4

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    How many of you are staying in your Sexless Marriages purely for financial reasons? How's that working out for ya?
    lycheechan lycheechan 31-35, F 24 Responses Sep 8

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    I my name is Ross Ian in sexless marriage situation . Ian married have kid's all of them out of home.lam married for 30e everything wasood until one day my wife disaided that we...
    kingofmassage kingofmassage 56-60, M 2 Responses Sep 8

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    I haven't yet written about my own on-going experience with this, but plan to soon. In the meantime, I came accross this and thought it too good to not share now. http://open...
    ace4444 ace4444 41-45, M Sep 8

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    After 20 years of blind loyalty I just realised something significant. After everything I have said and done, after everything we have been through together, and after...
    dadonthesofa dadonthesofa 46-50, M 14 Responses Sep 8

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    I feel like crap. I'm stuck in a funk I cannot pull myself out of. I had an email interaction with my wife last week about our sexless marriage. I tried my best to convey my...
    LifeinWoodinville LifeinWoodinville 41-45, M 18 Responses a week ago

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    I'm struck with a big picture thought about being in sexless marriages... If sex is not happening regularly with our spouses, WHATEVER they say about it, whatever excuses they...
    ace4444 ace4444 41-45, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    I am a young man that has never married, I'm really curious as to how it is to live in a sexless marriage. My thing is, if you love them, you are attracted to them, how can you Not...
    confushin confushin 22-25, M 8 Responses 5 days ago

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    Was in a sexless marriage...he couldn't ( or wouldn't) . We now live in different towns..still married and see each other on occasion for "dates" or trips out . Still no sex and no...
    freewayz freewayz 41-45, F 12 Responses 3 days ago

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    I was warned by several people on here that having had our child, the sexless marriage thing would get a lot worse than before I was pregnant. How right you all were. Husband has...
    Pattycakey Pattycakey 36-40, F 12 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I lived in a nearly sexless relationship for almost a decade. At first, of course, it was great, but it faded so very quickly, and became routine and VERY infrequent, like, four...
    incorporealist incorporealist 36-40, M 4 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I just want to give an update. My divorce was finalized this past Wednesday. My wife's last words to me were "Have a nice life." I am currently living with my best friend while I...
    NMBtruth1 NMBtruth1 41-45, M 14 Responses Aug 31

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    Undecided whether to post this under this group or under the other one "I'm having random thoughts", I believe posted here the discussion shall be more thoughtful and sensitive...
    TheDreamyWoman TheDreamyWoman 36-40, F 8 Responses 2 days ago

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    These are just random thoughts of mine recently as I have gone about my journey. Probably not very clear, so apologies if its a rough read:) My divorce was absolutely the hardest...
    Usernametbd Usernametbd 36-40, M 2 Responses Aug 23

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    Me, myself and my parents marriage... I asked my wife to go to a shrink with me about 3 years ago. she did not refuse the idea, but she ways always too busy, or tired or had a...
    frozenhere frozenhere 31-35, M 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    "A first meeting with a lawyer. It is that simple." As I progress in my journey towards exit, I just realised that it is quite helpful to allow sufficient time to stop and ponder...
    TheDreamyWoman TheDreamyWoman 36-40, F 13 Responses Sep 7

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    Why Did We Get Married? - My STBX continues to struggle with my decision to divorce him, yet my conviction to break free grows stronger everyday since I triggered our divorce...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 18 Responses Aug 17

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    I met my husband in the 7th grade but we didn't connect until high school. I became pregnant in our Senior year and we were married while still in school (a week to the day after...
    olderbutnotdead olderbutnotdead 51-55, F 5 Responses Aug 25

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