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I Think About Suicide

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,197 People

    I ******* hate it... I just want her back how

    can she be so happy with out me!!!! I don't want to do it any more!!!! I ******* done!!!!
    Landon6464 Landon6464 22-25, M Jan 7

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    Bipolar Freak

    dduuhhh!! Have tried on more than one occasion but never completed the task. Scared I guess, young perhaps, but I think if/when I get to that point again that I won't be afraid anymore. I've come to grips with it and promised myself that if I do hit THAT low, that place of no...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 12 Responses Sep 22, 2007

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    Sometimes I really identify with

    comedian/actor--the late Robin Williams. I am like him in some ways although much less talented or wealthy, obviously. Like Robin, my public persona is much like his---a funny guy with a good sense of humor and quit wit. But also like Robin, I have thought about suicide...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Dec 27, 2014

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    Despairingly longing what others have

    but I never had and never will. That's about summing it up in a simple way.
    Imoveryou Imoveryou 26-30, F 2 Responses Dec 28, 2014

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    I am 48 years old male

    who suffered a heart attack in 2010 which resulted in emergency open heart surgery with 8 bypasses. My wife found a new man while I was recovering and now I am going through a divorce. I am also in financial ruin because of this. She has also been successful in turning my...
    Rusty627 Rusty627 46-50, M 3 Responses Jan 5

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    About Facing Your Demons

    From 16 to 18 I'd had many suicide atempts; the most serious one was when I took 37 sleeping pils and slpet for 3 days and the time I've thrown myself in the river.I changed alot since then, I am 21 now and see things in a whole new light.The diference is that my old demons never...
    ruedecascades ruedecascades 18-21, M 5 Responses Oct 20, 2008

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    All the things that brought me out of the

    darkness and got me friends are linked to this hurtful situation and now they make me think about what she did I no longer find joy in anything on top of that she drove me to cut again
    1losthope 1losthope 18-21, F 4 Responses Dec 16, 2014

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    A lot. More than I like to admit.

    I just hate myself so much. I want all this pain inside to just go away, I can't handle it :(
    gybe gybe 18-21, M 4 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    So I don't know what I want to do.

    I dont want to kill myself but I dont want to be around. I feel like everything I do causes a problem for those around me, I feel like I am a terrible burden, I have absolutely no self worth, I have no drive to do anything. I know killing myself isn't the answer and besides I...
    SumireLythrum SumireLythrum 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 18, 2014

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    It's harder then I thought to kill myself

    but I won't fail a 2nd time
    defwish99 defwish99 31-35, M 2 Responses Jan 16

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    I don't know whats wrong with me.

    Sometimes I can't even get out of the bed. I try to look at the bright side of things but its hard an I can't.
    arestlesssoul arestlesssoul 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 7

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    I........I want to do it

    but I can't take pain and I don't want someone to be blamed for my death how can I do it?
    tonyxdeltorix tonyxdeltorix 22-25, M 12 Responses Jan 14

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    Sadly, I Do.

    I have tried to commit suicide three times before, and came quiet close twice but It never happened. I still think about it often because I am not satisfied with my life at all. But In reality, I'm not actually sure If want to die or If I just want to end my unhappiness. For now...
    KawaiiDoll KawaiiDoll 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 12, 2011

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    From a Friend....

    Hey you- tell me what has got you down. There’s no need to cry or wear that frown.   You dont have to commit suicide Because I will be by your side. I’ve been there and I understand you Lean on me and I’ll carry you through. I’m not going...
    fungirlmmm fungirlmmm 41-45, F 11 Responses Aug 8, 2008

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    WintergreenChew WintergreenChew 18-21, M Dec 29, 2014

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    Trying to Cope

    It was Dec 11 2006 when my life was turned upside down. I was injured at work. Since then I have been treated like a liar, my friends form work have stopped calling, I'm in pain 24/7 and the Workers Comp and Social Security system has striped me of all dignity and made me...
    HurtAtWork HurtAtWork 41-45, M 5 Responses Dec 12, 2007

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    No Prince Charming Came to Save Me

    I have been through so much, and the only person who came to help me was me. If I didn't do it, it didn't get done. I've tried killing myself before, and those feelings are coming back. My body was too strong and I woke up, no one came to my aide. I'm tired of being nice to...
    Readerblackchic Readerblackchic 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 9, 2009

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    I'm too scared to live I was just talking with

    my mother about something and I said "maybe I'll get hit by a car and die" She got mad xD Now I'm lucky to have a mother who loves me But I'm afraid of the day when I have no one My future is really dark. This is why I quit the hard road to my dream job,and now I'm studying...
    AutoLove0 AutoLove0 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 1

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    I hate when I am like this,

    but I can't help it . I need help 😢😢
    spookiemoogie spookiemoogie 22-25, M 2 Responses Jan 7

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    It's not what happen to me

    when I was younger. It's knowing I can't change. And the cycle repeats.
    BEARNDN BEARNDN 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 6

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    Why... Why Not...

    I've had this hurt in the stomach for so long. No one should live with that daily. I sleep very bad, and I think it doesn't make my jugdement clearer, far from it. But i have to functionate like if nothing was wrong. that's what our society is. A friend here posted...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 3, 2009

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    To any of those thinking about this,

    I want you to know my story. I was suicidal for my entire senior year of high school. We had moved from the place where I had lived longest in my entire life. My home life was a mess, my parents highly stressed, nothing was together, there was a lot of yelling, screaming...
    PinkMellow PinkMellow 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 30, 2014

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    I just got. Sudden rush of sadness.

    . My meds aren't working tonight and I feel stuck and I just want to relapse so bad. Go ahead and say I want attention but I don't. I just don't know what the **** to do
    Tinylove0973 Tinylove0973 22-25, F 5 Responses Jan 20

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    From Someone Who's Been There...

       For all of you thinking about suicide, let me tell you about something from someone who’s been there. I contemplated suicide in my teens. Gawky and loserish, I had zero friends and no prospects for a fun high school life whatsoever. My mom used to get drunk and...
    readnwritewithwine readnwritewithwine 31-35, M 4 Responses Nov 7, 2007

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    these days so many things happened to me

    and made my stupid life worse , my dad is going to talk to me tonight and i know he will yell at me and say i did things that i didn't and make me feel like **** , he always do that but idc anymore ,if we get to a point so okay but if we don't i don't have any other reason to...
    imscum imscum 18-21, F Dec 16, 2014

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    There's only so far you can bend

    before you break, and I think I've reached my breaking point.
    Crispy25 Crispy25 22-25, M Jan 16

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    31 years old and all I want do do is end it.

    It'd be better for everyone... this is the strongest feeling I feel at this moment and I'm just tired of hurting everyone. I think life would be better for them all if I just ended things and let them get on with life... This is the only pulse in my system right now.. I'm tired...
    Celebi83 Celebi83 31-35, M 3 Responses Jan 4

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    Yea..

    It's wrong yea, but it's eternal relief... nothing really else to say..
    PiecingMeBackTogether PiecingMeBackTogether 18-21 3 Responses Oct 12, 2013

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    beschwar beschwar 36-40, M Jan 15

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    A Poem For the Dying....

      AS THE TIME NEARS    The time is near to say goodbye to the pain and fears. And this cold lonely place filled with heartache and tears.     I write the note and place it on the door. Notifying all they won’t find me here anymore.  ...
    fungirlmmm fungirlmmm 41-45, F 14 Responses Aug 8, 2008

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    I Hate My Life

    I have ever since I was 12 and my life was ruined by my step-father. For a couple of years now I've been wanting to kill myself, even more so now that I can't go to college or get a job. It wouldn't be hard either. My mom has some painkillers that I could take. I can just fall...
    Chiazu Chiazu 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 2, 2009

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    I'm a Failure and I Want to Commit Suicide

    Every time I get into my car I wish to get into an accident and die.  I am 19 years old and am a virgin.  I will never get laid or have a girlfriend because I am an incompetant **** who can't do anything right.  I've only had one girlfriend in my life and that was...
    Alejandro Alejandro 19-21, M 407 Responses Dec 28, 2007

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    I haven't felt like ending my life

    for a long time. It's strangely comforting, like an ex you know you shouldn't go back to but you get sucked in, a painful and pleasurable experience simultaneously. You've driven me to feel this low, after keeping me so high I was afraid to look down for so long. I knew this day...
    amillionpeople amillionpeople 22-25 1 Response Jan 14

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    To Shake Off The Mortal Coils

     Last entry into a diary - authorship unknown. "A permanent solution to a temporary problem" - that is what the wise and good people state to help. The way they make suicide look like a decision based on cowardice is remarkable, when in the end it is a clear statement...
    frostbittensoul frostbittensoul 41-45, M Mar 25, 2010

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    For years now it's been up there.

    It's almost a comforting thought now. It's like, "Well, if things don't work out, you could always call it quits." I don't know why. I don't have a troubled past, my parents support me even now, in their way. I remember even when I was a kid, not even a teen, I thought, or...
    minatek616 minatek616 22-25, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Everyday I wake up, no matter how hard I try

    the S thought comes rushing through time and time again. Is not just as passing thought but instead once the S is alive in my front lobe, is an undeniable feeling of hopelessness. I can't help myself to think about it over and over again. Is exhausting yet I sometimes even get...
    lastchancecurious lastchancecurious 36-40, F 3 Responses Jan 19

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    There Is A Point, I Was Wrong

    Did you ever crash with the speed of light? Did you ever feel, all came tumbling down, on top of you? I did, yesterday. And I almost did something stupid. There is this spoof Airport movie, Airplane!, with Lloyd Bridges. In it, there is this running gag, that Bridges' character...
    Idonwannadie Idonwannadie 46-50, M Oct 9, 2012

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    Every day I think about suicide just don't know

    why I haven't gone through with it yet
    rainyday10 rainyday10 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 19

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    The thoughts had been gone

    for 15 years hidden deep within my mind. One of my worst nightmares came to life almost 1 year ago which have awaken the lost and broken me I had put away for so long. It is a daily struggle and I am tired of fighting but fighting is what I shall do bc my weakness is somehow...
    kaigeshadow kaigeshadow 31-35, F Jan 19

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    M1362 M1362 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 17

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    I'm 20 years old and I feel like life holds

    nothing good for me. I can't get suicide out of my head, it's driving me mad. My life is no longer worth living. I have nothing, I have accomplished nothing, and I just get pushed around and thrown to the curb. I love people, I love everyone. But my love is getting me hurt more...
    WintergreenChew WintergreenChew 18-21, M 1 Response Dec 26, 2014

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    I've never thought about killing myself

    as much as I do now. I feel like there's no way to get around the fact that not a person around me believe anything positive about me. I don't understand why it's okay to tell me everything that I do wrong and every wrong thing about my character... I feel beat down I feel...
    wtftodo51 wtftodo51 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 8, 2014

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    Tired

    I get very frustrated with my inability to change and being bogged down in depression.  I certainly consider the possibility of ending my life.  If I can't change and I'm miserable where I am why not just shut it all down.  It's all a futile effort so why even try...
    ReformedAutomaton ReformedAutomaton 36-40, M 27 Responses Jun 11, 2007

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    Loss And Pain

      Eight years ago I had to take a medical retirement from teaching. I loved teaching so it was a great loss.  The Global Neurological Damage has caused pain that only gets worse and worse.    I am usually at home because it hurts too much to go out. Ha! I...
    Dewduster Dewduster 66-70, M 3 Responses Dec 7, 2009

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    Words that should have come by ep somehow but wanted to share...

     This is similar to something i read -i changed it a bit to share it... i wanted ep to do it but i share it .. Don't encourage other members to harm themselves We are here to talk and share feelings and thoughts. Endorsements of suicide are counterproductive. It can...
    amysangels amysangels 22-25, F 2 Responses May 16, 2010

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    The Compassion Of A Complete But Caring Stranger (there Is Hope!)

    The video below is of a suicide attempt on a bridge in in Shenzhen City, Guangdong Province, China.  A 16 year-old boy holding a knife is threatening to kill himself as emergency workers attempt to talk him out of hurting himself. As emergency workers are working to resolve the...
    social02 social02 26-30, M 2 Responses Jun 16, 2012

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    I Feel Guilty For My Feelings Sometimes..

    i know i ll never try again but when i have thoughts and then someone sais ''u r important'' ,''is because i care for  u''or sais something i feel guilty ..because many times i know im not important ,maybe for me ,coz i dont like myself,coz i have many thoughts...
    amysangels amysangels 22-25, F 19 Responses May 7, 2010

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    I Think About Suicide

    But I wouldn't consider myself suicidal. Lately I get these really vivid thoughts of me sticking a 12 gauge in my mouth.  It's starting to freak me out.
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Dec 13, 2007

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    I never used to think about it,

    I used to be petrified of the thought of dying and it made me uneasy just to think your heart will just stop one day. Two and a half years ago my life was changed forever and now I fight the desire almost every day. Yesterday was awful. I am bitter at the things life robbed me...
    Imoveryou Imoveryou 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 25, 2014

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    Go Away

    I don't want to ponder you any more. Leave.
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Apr 2, 2008

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    i know it's not the answer.

    Death seems peaceful.i can not hurt my family,this is why i stay.I have lost so much,my house ,all my income,my mom is very ill.I was diagnosed mentally ill,along with my 3 children.Now i have no clue how i will pay decembers rent ,this is only a couple things,so much more...
    1prettygirl 1prettygirl 36-40, F 12 Responses Nov 9, 2014

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    I am thinking about doing it,

    I can't see any good in my life that I do or am, so I want to end it