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I Think Some Men Have Really Bad Pick Up Lines

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 107 People

    What a Dog!

    I once had a drunk guy at a bar tell me he wanted to lick my legs like a puppy dog. Gross.
    prplfae prplfae 22-25, F Aug 6, 2009

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    Wrong Language, Buddy

    I was in the Union Station bookstore killing some time before going home after work one day.  This guy looking at some books next to me, out of the blue, says, "So uhh..do you work around here?" and I say I just got off work and I'm looking at books before going...
    yoyy yoyy 26-30, F 28 Responses Nov 30, 2008

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    I' Ve Heard Some Really Bad Ones...

    so in retaliation I looked up a few on the internet to give back to  the guys that dished them out... it was hilarious to see their "duh-uh" looks when I came back with an equally lame and ridiculous pick up line... here are a couple that I liked to use quite often...
    phidget phidget 31-35, F 22 Responses Jun 30, 2008

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    For Years

    for years a friend of ours used the line... "oh wow that dress is very becoming...you know if i were on you i'd be ******* too"... sadly i hate to report that it often got him a good laugh and a phone number... to each their own..
    RocknRose RocknRose 26-30, F Jul 1, 2008

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    So....this one is a doozy.

    ... During my first trip to Europe, I was on a tour...nine countries in 25 days. I met an awesome Aussie lady and we were fast friends. We hung out, quite a bit, had a ton of fun and one day we were sitting outside of our hotel in Hopfgarten, Austria...chatting...waiting for...
    Pinky65 Pinky65 46-50, F 9 Responses Aug 21, 2014

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    Another Good One

    If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.
    MasterShake25 MasterShake25 22-25 Aug 8, 2009

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    I Had Some Pretty Bad Ones...

    Once upon a time, I was a single guy in Chicago. I had a decent job, a nice apartment, and a group of good friends that liked to hang out at the bar a few blocks from my place. We were there most nights, and try as I might, I never could quite get the whole pick up line thing...
    ord2act ord2act 31-35, M 5 Responses Oct 16, 2011

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    Sharing, Are We?

    The worst ever is when guys ask me, "What's your sign?" And I tell them, thinking that maybe they're into astrology also, "I'm Scorpio." And then the next thing is, them asking how well does Scorpio and their sign make in a relationship. The first guy who...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Dec 1, 2008

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    50 Shades Of Hell No

    So I am seeing what is out there, man wise, and it is not looking good. Don't get me wrong, there are some nice ones out there, but they are way out numbered by the jack holes. For instance, take this one guy, John (and that IS his real name). John seemed nice. We met for...
    phoenix924 phoenix924 36-40 1 Response Oct 22, 2012

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    He Knows Nothing About Me But He Says....................

    Forget all these rubbish men you've been out with. or I expect you've been treated really badly by men. My reply it "No, I was happily married. My husband died. So what are you going on about"? Their answer is "well you know what | mean" I reply "No. What are you going on about...
    chanelP chanelP 41-45, F 1 Response Dec 13, 2011

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    60% of the Time, They Work Every Time

    Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I like spaghetti, Let's go ****.  Does this rag smell funny to you?  Hey now, let's not turn this rape into a murder.
    MasterShake25 MasterShake25 22-25 Aug 6, 2009

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    13 Pick Up Lines That Might Get You Killed

    1. If you and I were squirrels, could I busta nut in your hole? 2. I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag. 3. If it's true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning. 4.  How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized...
    CuriosityKitten CuriosityKitten 31-35, F 15 Responses Aug 22, 2009

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    Way Too Cheesy And Lame

    We have all heard our share, here's a few of the worst (at least in my opinion): 1. "Are your parents beavers cause DAMMMM!" 2. "Let's make like a candle and go out." 3. "How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice, hi my name is ____." 4. "Did it hurt when you fell...
    PenelopeParfait PenelopeParfait 18-21, F 5 Responses Jun 27, 2012

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    A List Of My Favorites

    1) I've got Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow? 2) I heard milk was good for you but, DAMN! How much did you drink? 3) Hey baby. Wanna play house? You be the door and I'll slam you. 4) Do you have a Bandaid? I cut my knee falling for you. 5) Are you going to kiss...
    DreamlessDesire DreamlessDesire 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 23, 2012

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    A Couple Memorable Experiences

    They call me "coffee",  I grind so fine.   I actually laughed when a guy said that to me once.  Then of course he hung around all night thinking he was 'in'.  It didn't go anywhere, but he was funny to listen to.   The freakiest was after...
    MissSarahAnne MissSarahAnne 26-30, F 10 Responses Nov 15, 2008

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    Are Your Parents Terrorists?

    Cause you're the bomb! god, am I really supposed to fall for that kind of ****? seriously... that's just idiotic.
    forgetmyname forgetmyname 16-17, F 1 Response Feb 6, 2008

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    Really Corny Pick Up Lines..

    man: "do you know how to drive?" girl: "yes..why?" man: "because you drive me crazy." girl: THREW UP lol
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jun 30, 2008

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    Some Are So Bad, You Can't Help But Laugh!

    So, I having been single for about a year and half now. I thought it was time to step up my game and hit the social scene with my friends, which i have been doing for the past 2 months. This usually involves a few pub crawls in my local town and having to endure the half...
    fantafringe fantafringe 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 5, 2009

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    Well...

    Just an hour or 2 ago I was riding home from work on my bike, when I met this guy riding the opposite direction who stared at my(not special and not significantly large) breasts, than at my face and said "Hello beautiful, feel like having sex?" To be honest, I actually...
    JojaRodenaLente JojaRodenaLente 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 1, 2008

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    So...

    Here's the worst pick up line I ever received: "So... I like your boobs. Wanna go out?" Um. No. 
    kleisse kleisse 22-25, F Aug 5, 2009

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    Lame? Or Not Lame?

    "If I followed you home...would you keep me?" "I lost my number...can I borrow yours?" "Am I cute enough yet? or do you need more drinks?" "You know what would look great on you? Me" "All those curves...and me with no brakes."...
    AGeminisTwin AGeminisTwin 36-40, F 3 Responses Jun 12, 2009

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    Atleast Some Of Them Get Creative

    "Do you like Harry Potter? Cause I'm trying to get into your Chamber of Secrets." "Did you get your pants at a sale? Cause in my house they'd be 100% off." "Do you like Australian kisses? They're like French kisses, but down under." "The word of the day is legs. Now let's go back...
    ChasingNothing ChasingNothing 18-21, F 3 Responses Jun 13, 2013

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    Lame

    I've been on the receiving of many lame pick up lines. I don't actually mind if someone asked me my sign cause i'm into astrology too. But last week i was in the city and walked past McDonalds and there was some creepy dude that seemed to take an interest in me, and was staring...
    jasminjane jasminjane 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 17, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    I think that the worst Pickup lines that I ever used was "Hey, I forgot my telephone number, can you give me yours??" And I remember that..... IT WORKED. She gave me her number and...
    MrZenigata MrZenigata 26-30, M Feb 7

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    When I was younger girls were cuties with their lines. 17 year old me getting hit on " If I followed you home, would you keep me ?" Most recent pickup like used on me " Heyyy...
    TheLionGod TheLionGod 36-40, M Feb 12

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    I lost my virginity.....can i have yours?
    isalolita isalolita 18-21, F 5 Responses Feb 17

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    You're so hot, if you ate bread you'd poop toast! ;)
    DustToDust97 DustToDust97 16-17, F 2 Responses Feb 7

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    Are you a poster cuz I wanna pin you to the wall? .3.
    RealisticSmile RealisticSmile 13-15, F 1 Response Feb 8

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    what size shoe you wear babygirl? I'm gonna guess size sexy (okay I stole that from jennamarbles but I absolutely love that video lol)
    cillasavage cillasavage 18-21, F 4 Responses Feb 9

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    why don't you sit on my lap and we'll talk about whatever pops up. LOL
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Feb 9

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    How would you like to replace the girl in my dreams? lmao
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Feb 9

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    You know the way to a mans heart is through his stomach right? So if you sit in my face I'll eat my way to your heart!
    TheLionGod TheLionGod 36-40, M 1 Response Feb 12

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    Wanna go 50/50 on a baby ?
    TheLionGod TheLionGod 36-40, M Feb 12

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    hey, boy. Are you a stolen bike? bc I wanna ride you till I'm bored and then leave you in a ditch
    isalolita isalolita 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 18

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    Can anyone help me with a dream I had...?
    AthleticKid16 AthleticKid16 18-21, F Feb 2

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    One of the worst nightmares I've ever had. The streets were flooding with alligators and sea monsters that attacked when I was driving into town. When I made it to town laws had...
    katariffik katariffik 31-35, F a week ago

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    No not. again.... they keep. coming. back...
    Allywall Allywall 13-15, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I have this bad habit getting close to people and thinking that their always going to be by my side but eventually they always leave. I have this bad habit of loving people a...
    RedThatDescribesMe RedThatDescribesMe 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 19

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    I don't understand why all men aren't respectful to women. Most have done nothing to them individually. I went through an expensive divorce and I treat my ex with a degree of...
    SilverPagan SilverPagan 51-55, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Have a Bad Dentist Experience
    goodnites1011 goodnites1011 22-25, M 1 day ago

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    Then again I think some girls are pretty stupid as well..XD
    MariexOkay MariexOkay 13-15, F 5 Responses Feb 18

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    The worst pick up I have. I doesn't even work. But my pick up is "you know what time is it?"
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F Feb 2

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    The worst pick up line I have is "you know what time it is?" The guy would answer it. Then I quickly go in for a conversation.
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F Feb 2

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    Okay, well... I don't know how to start this... Okay........... I... uh I have a past. A bad, bad past. It all started when my Mum died of Cancer...... everything changed once she...
    akfrancheska akfrancheska 16-17, F 6 days ago

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    I just really hate this male-dominated world. Its a disgusting hierarchy. Women are people, women are caring, women are real and beautiful and they should be treated that way. Some...
    frescowalden frescowalden 18-21, T Feb 19

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    "Thinking Of You" Comparisons are easily done Once you've had a taste of perfection Like an apple hanging from a tree I picked the ripest one I still got the seed You said...
    TheScorpio1966 TheScorpio1966 46-50, M 1 Response Feb 5

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    The Bane of My Existence-Instead of happy memories of "Daddy Daughter" outings and feelings of adoration I have memories of daily confrontations and feelings of general unease. He...
    MimsatheQuiet MimsatheQuiet 18-21, F Feb 11

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    I actually did... told her how I feel! I wrote her a letter and handed it to her. Told her that I really like her, but the words I used, it was obviously more than just like! Told...
    slimmmerman slimmmerman 41-45, M 1 Response Feb 15

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