beside himself with excitement over the birth of his son, was determined to do everything right.
"So, tell me, Nurse," he asked as his new family headed out the hospital door, "what time should we wake the little guy in the morning?"
his business and see how things are going. He goes down to the shipping docks and sees a young man leaning against the wall doing nothing.
The owner walks up to the young man and says, "Son, how much do you make a day?"
The guy replies, "150 dollars."
The owner pulls out...
woods. The bear looks at the rabbit and in a quiet conspiratorial tone asks if the rabbit has problems with poop sticking to his fur.
The rabbit looks up at the bear disgusted and replies, "No, I don't!"
So the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.
LAUGH NO. 1
Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of wolves. The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket.
After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, "Well, do you want to make a run for it or stay here a few days and outnumber them?"
avoid a box that fell out of the truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seen the carton in the road. The policemen stopped traffic and recovered the box. It was found to contain large upholstery...
when he noticed a little boy trying to ring a doorbell, but it was just out of his reach.
After watching his efforts for some time, the preacher walked over and rang the bell. He then asked the boy, "now what", to which the boy turned and shouted, "NOW WE RUN!!"
during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they had spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.
Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel plans. So, the husband left first and flew to SriLanka on Thursday, with his...
and is pulled over by a blond female cop. The cop walks up to her can and asks to see her drivers license.
The girl fumbles through her purse for a while and then looks up at the cop and asks what it looks like.
The cop frowns, "It's a square thing with your picture on it...