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I Use to Be a Self Mutilator

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 50 People

    Escape

    When i first started self mutilating it was out of anger and i was depressed, my father being an alcoholic and my parents always constantly fighting making my sister and i feel so out of place, my sister became bulimic and between watching my parents and my sister struggle and...
    blackskys blackskys 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 12, 2012

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    A Long Short Story

    The first time I cut was the first time I heard that no one cared about me. All the family and family friends we're talking around me but would never offer me any criticism. It wasn't the only reason but it was the final push. I didn't even know what I was doing, like I was...
    SequoiaCM SequoiaCM 18-21 3 Responses Apr 27, 2010

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    8-|

     I used to do it almost every night when i was 12. I stopped at the age of 16, and sometimes I do miss it. It was just so calming for me at the time, but it now breaks my heart to see it on other people. I feel ashamed for putting my mum and dad and my little sister through...
    thegirlwiththefatcat thegirlwiththefatcat 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 5, 2009

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    When I Was Younger

    I started cutting after breaking up with my boyfriend of two years, I'd kinda been curious and it made me feel better, after that i would whenever i was sad or angry at myself. I haven't in a while and now i look down at my leg and i hate my scars i never know...
    hotmess713 hotmess713 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 29, 2008

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    Used To

    I used to cut my self about 4 months ago. Thanks to one of my good friends, I quit. I used to take long baths, and go in there with a plastic knife, and cut my self. I still have scars to this very day, but always stressed of people finding out. Every once and a while I cut my...
    toughchick101 toughchick101 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 8, 2010

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    Endurance- Poem

    Endurance A knife lays beside me, Robbing my veins, My ghost lies inside me, Bringing me pain. My soul is reaching for happiness,but it is too far- So my fingers are leaving me with yet another scar. My eyes aren't crying, There searching for hope- My blood is draining, To help...
    TheSunshineheart TheSunshineheart 18-21 1 Response Nov 23, 2011

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    Maybe?

    I do it time to time... like years in between so does that count as I used to be? Probably not... oh well
    CrazyHappySad CrazyHappySad 22-25, F Jun 12, 2012

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    Scars of Betrayal

    Well the first time I cut myself was after I read a book about a girl who cuts. I was fully intrigued for some reason and wanted to do it, so the next time I was angry or sad I did. And it was the worst thing I have ever done to myself. Because I was hooked. I did it...
    BlazzinBebe88 BlazzinBebe88 18-21, F 6 Responses Oct 21, 2008

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    I

    its still so tempting i dont know how long i will last. when i started cutting i guess i kind of built myself up to it, got brave enough. one day i stepped on a mirror in my room and instead of cleaning it up, i left it there. it layed there on that floor for a month...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Sep 3, 2009

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    Too Old to Be So Messed Up!

    To say that I used to be a self-mutilator isn't 100% accurate. I sort of still want to.  I just realized that picking at scabs is considered to be self-mutilating.  And I am a picker.   I started self mutilating when I was very young.  It stopped...
    toooldforthis toooldforthis 51-55 1 Response Nov 29, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    I used self harm for attention, and then it soon became more like an addiction so I started keeping it to myself. I now have stopped and Im almost a year clean :) I'm so glad I got...
    zennarts zennarts 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 24

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    Not really anymore I used to have lots but things changed. Iv been in a relationship for nearly 2 years and feel so comfortable with him that I don't really make an effort with...
    willowknight willowknight 22-25, F 4 hrs ago

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    So here' s the deal, i was going here around ep when i saw question that says, "Why do teens hurt themselves on purpose?" Me being a part of that, cuz yeah i'm a cutter, read the...
    kmisfit123 kmisfit123 16-17, F 2 Responses 5 hrs ago

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    Lol a selfie with my friend 😂
    CherylYo CherylYo 16-17, F 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    I honestly don't really know if it's official or not, and I don't want to go to a doctor. I think I'm fine managing by myself. I started to have bad anxiety/depression since last...
    AwfullyRad AwfullyRad 13-15, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    The growing trend of taking smartphone selfies is linked to mental health conditions that focus on a person’s obsession with looks. According to psychiatrist Dr David Veal...
    MFBG MFBG 61-65, M a week ago

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    i dont really have much self esteem anymore. i used to be really fat but even then, I was happy and I felt pretty. nowdays, i dont. it's like, everyone tells me im pretty and that...
    TrueLondon TrueLondon 18-21, F Sep 3

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    It really is owing to your talent that she did not really have to go throughout the forehead flap treatment, and because of you that she is healing beautifully! Your caring and...
    Joshua603a4yn8 Joshua603a4yn8 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 24

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    Hi I'm new here. This is a pretty personal post as a first story, but I feel like I can just let it all out on a community whom I am a stranger to. Basically, I used to self harm...
    DieWithYourMaskOn DieWithYourMaskOn 13-15, T 1 Response Sep 8

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    If you used to self-harm, what are the strategies you used that helped you stop?
    Kneetar04 Kneetar04 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 25

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    That's the understatement. I used to be quiet and reserved, my voice used to be soft, not harsh and raspy, like whiskey and smoker's voice. I HATE living in the duplex my mom and...
    NoMoreMissNiceBitch NoMoreMissNiceBitch 41-45, F 7 Responses Sep 2

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    I'm reading an amazing book tonight, entitled "Boundaries and Relationships: Knowing, Protecting, and Enjoying the Self". One part of it made me cry because I just cannot believe...
    mistletoe41 mistletoe41 41-45, F Sep 3

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    Cutting is one of the most misunderstood human behaviors. And like any addiction, cutting is an extremely difficult thing to stop. We can become addicted to the chemicals that our...
    findmeholdmeloveme findmeholdmeloveme 18-21 1 Response 4 days ago

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    If you do not receive an ATOL Certification then the reserving will not be ATOL protected. If you do get an ATOL Certificate but the many parts of your excursion will not be shown...
    Temple2516ja Temple2516ja 31-35, M 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    I'm not proud of it. I started self harming when I was 14 years old. I didn't hurt myself, and it wasn't very often. It started getting really bad while I was 15, my parents had a...
    CemoneDC CemoneDC 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 26

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    I've been having some thoughts about this for a few days now, which I might have partly reflected in comments I've made here and there, can't remember... What I've been thinking...
    sometimeslonelytoo sometimeslonelytoo 41-45, M 2 Responses Aug 27

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    exctually I was always obessed with my weight my look and my physical appearance.last year I made my decision.I went on diet.I started to eat less and exercise.but one or two week...
    redblack4 redblack4 13-15, F 6 Responses Sep 3

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    This kind of sh*t is just ridiculous. EP Link Romanticising self harm is just bloody stupid; it's not cute, lovely, 'tragically beautiful' or any of that bullsh*t. It's just a...
    BrokenThread BrokenThread 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 6

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    I used to be the meanest and most self-serving person. Friends from that time refuse to associate with me, even when I contact them with sincere apologies. I'm much better now...
    LifeDispenser LifeDispenser 31-35, M 2 Responses Sep 7

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    I'm a 55 year old yoga/workout mom. I'm also a woman's self defense expert because I became sick of men grabbing for my butt. Today I was forced to use my self defense for the...
    yogamom55 yogamom55 51-55, F 2 Responses Sep 11

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    I think the fact that I admire self discipline implies that I recognize I could use more of it than what I have, at least in dealing with my weaknesses. I wish I could turn off the...
    4myinnerchild 4myinnerchild 51-55, M 1 Response a week ago

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    It threw me to abyss only to feel my demise. I am in no position to negotiate. Falling. Uninformed; Unaware. Chaos surrounds me. Noise. Different tones; I am not able to know...
    Matoy Matoy 18-21, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    All round, they carry essentially the most pure information of any fellowship. If you're prepared to locate a solution for medication and alcohol This is actually the location to...
    Anthony825d5cr0 Anthony825d5cr0 31-35, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Should you be possessing problem in getting a tour operator to reply to your complaint, you should use the subsequent rule and complain in regards to the insufficient reaction...
    Jacksonpj05 Jacksonpj05 31-35, M 1 Response 22 hrs ago

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    Self harmed for 4 years... Stopped about three months ago because of my wonderful boyfriend Mark. He has helped me so much and Is there for me all the time. I no longer feel the...
    gorgeoushobo gorgeoushobo 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 24

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    i used to self harm. i want to help people get better and keep clean
    blosszm blosszm 13-15, F Aug 26

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    So this is all probably tied together. I used to have serious problems with my self image. Like so bad I dropped from 200 to 160 lbs in two months one year by walking everywhere...
    shintoangel226 shintoangel226 26-30, T Aug 26

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    Self taught, of course, although the skill comes only with experience, and like all things, I consider myself still learning and practice often. And I was once seeing someone who...
    Faust76 Faust76 36-40, M Aug 27

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    i have scars on my arms and thighs. i cut only those parts of my bodies. well i used to cut my arms but my thighs are currently filled with cuts. i am battling depression. cutting...
    metalchick123 metalchick123 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 30

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    I had a girlfriend in high school that i found out did it and I adopted it to see what it was like as a way to understand where she was coming from and I eventually came up with my...
    graywolf558 graywolf558 26-30, M Sep 1

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    As a boy, I used to hate going to the barbers. Sometimes I'd be taken by my father, or my mother, or rarely, by my grandfather. At all times I'd be given a short, back and sides...
    SLdale SLdale 51-55, M 1 Response Sep 2

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    I really wish I had the attention span to give a full explanation. I haven't regularly harmed myself since high school. It's been 13 years since then. I wish I would have gotten...
    piprimate piprimate 26-30, F 1 Response Sep 4

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    It's been a while since I thought about self harm , but the urge is back once again.
    mimilsu mimilsu 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 7

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    I used to be friendly and talkative but now i keep on hiding my true self from my new secondary classmates, afraid to let them know i am someone who is not as good as they think.
    wildthoughts33 wildthoughts33 13-15 1 Response Sep 7

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    Self harm free one year today. :P -Alyxander
    crazyhyperkid crazyhyperkid 13-15, M 1 Response Sep 10

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    I have very low self esteem I am recently out of a marriage that ended after five years I feel like I don't really deserve to be loved like something's wrong with me. I was in a...
    1sweetnurse 1sweetnurse 31-35, F 6 Responses Sep 12

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    I never cut myself. I thought I was strong because of this. But I realised I self-harmed in other ways. I would deny myself good things to punish myself for something. I would...
    kalila37 kalila37 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 12

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    I have friend that I met through work. He had recently broken up with his girlfriend when he started flirting with me, telling me how much he wanted to spend time with me. I...
    Muse20 Muse20 18-21, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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