I Used to Cut

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 2,331 People

    For almost 20 years. Recently stopped.

    It's a constant struggle but I'm staying strong :)
    AlleywayGospel AlleywayGospel
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Jun 10, 2014

    okay so I haven't cut in like 3 months

    or 4 months but I ****** all of that up yesterday when I started to draw on my arm with a razor. Yesterday was just not a good day for me
    PlayingPretty PlayingPretty
    13-15, F
    1 Response Mar 20

    I used to cut about 2-3 years ago

    because of the lifestyle my mom put me through. Her boyfriend at that time was a drug addict and has a record. He would beat my mom every other day if she didn't get him money to buy drugs. She was close to death many times. He tried to run her over, pushed he down on concrete...
    cutemonkey cutemonkey
    16-17, F
    2 Responses Jul 23, 2015

    the first time was in 5th grade.

    I remember that I tried to use scissors because I didn't have anything else and then my mom found a pencil sharpener with only half of a blade and so I had to make up an excuse. I'm a year clean now and I've flushed all of my blades:))
    sxvenfxld sxvenfxld
    13-15, F
    1 Response Jan 15

    I've been clean for 3 months

    but I did it again last night. I was so depressed and there was nobody that I can talk to, and people still don't give a ****.
    20ShadesOfBlue 20ShadesOfBlue
    18-21, M
    1 Response Sep 21, 2015

    Yeah, a very long time ago.

    But I'm starting to have urges again...I don't know why...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses May 29, 2015

    I was 3 years clean until tonight.

    I took my razors with me into the bath along with a glass of wine. I'm so ashamed of myself. Why couldn't I hold it together for just one more night? I wish I had been stronger. The scariest part was how it all came back to me the moment I started. Like it was second-nature, as...
    iamrae22 iamrae22
    22-25, F
    Oct 3, 2015

    I'm having some trouble.

    I cut from the time I was 11 up until I was 16. I'm 18 now. I've slipped up a couple of times since but never really relapsed. The recent stress of my mother's medical problems, my medical problems, my family's current financial situation and starting college (among other things...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    3 Responses Aug 3, 2015
    camasf camasf
    16-17, F
    6 Responses Jun 24, 2015

    I did it to deal with my clinical depression

    and anxiety. Although it is still tempting sometimes, I'm proud to say I'm going on 3 months clean :)
    VicLucyCole VicLucyCole
    16-17, F
    1 Response Apr 12, 2014

    Because of Him....

    Well, when I graduated the 8th grade I started to date a guy from my class who I really liked. We dated until our Junior year of high school and he was very controling and when ever he hurt me I found a place where no one could disturb me and I would find anything sharp and just...
    Mouse Mouse
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Oct 23, 2006

    I know how hard it is to quit

    such a addicting thing, but it'll be the best thing you ever decide to do. I am almost a year clean in December. I may not be 100% better but I'm better then I was when I was in that spot of my life. I just wanted to share how I felt about this because it is something I did stop...
    desantisj desantisj
    16-17, F
    Oct 26, 2015

    How many days Clean are you?

    I'm 188 and Its tempting sometimes but I ignore the feeling.
    illuminateh illuminateh
    13-15, F
    2 Responses Mar 10

    I want to cause self pain do I can release the

    pain that is bottled up in side. We are told to " take life one day at a time, do not worry about tomorrow". I am not able to live one day at a time... I have to take one breath at a time and keep my mind moving. If I stop for one second I will feel my inner pain. I do not...
    nevets68 nevets68
    46-50, M
    3 Responses Jan 22

    There are times, like right now,

    where I'd give anything to cut. When my anxiety is so bad. And I can't shake the feeling that everyone hates me and I'm a worthless piece of sh!t. I'd love just one cut. Slow and deep with a serrated blade, like old times. And then cut until I just disappear. Until I stop...
    AlleywayGospel AlleywayGospel
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Jul 1, 2014

    This is less of an experience

    and more of an offer. I've been through it and come out the other side. If you're ever tempted, want tips to stop, or just to know my story then please feel free to message me. YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS FIGHT
    dannyhdh dannyhdh
    18-21, M
    Jan 17

    Yes....as a teenager/twenty-something I used to

    cut. It was a long time ago and the urge has loooong passed.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses Oct 25, 2014

    Can't believe I used to hurt myself to try to

    not feel pain. But when I look at the scars I caused myself I realize it is true. I'm glad I mostly cut on my thighs.
    BrokeAssBxtch BrokeAssBxtch
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Sep 6, 2015

    I know why it would seem to "help"

    for some people. I used to do it. I wasted so much time doing that stupid crap when I could've been getting help. If you cut, you're wasting life. Don't cause more problems for yourself. Do everything in your power to drop that and get help.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Dec 30, 2015

    Even when I was becoming increasingly more

    depressed and anxious, I never understood why someone would cut himself or herself. It made no sense to me at all. Why would you hurt yourself? How could that possibly help anything? And I was afraid of blood. Then one day, it feels like, it just suddenly made sense. Out of...
    Babaghanouj Babaghanouj
    22-25, F
    Sep 6, 2015

    It's officially been 2 clean months

    for me💕 For anyone struggling with cutting you are always welcome to talk to me💕 keep fighting loves😘
    Waterstorm Waterstorm
    16-17, F
    4 Responses Sep 30, 2014

    Help, I am not feeling safe tonight,

    I might have to go to the ER for mental safety check. I am feeling tired of trying to live with depression. I do not want to take my medication. With my doctor's okay, I have been slowly coming off my medication. Well, I might have to go back on it because I feel life is not...
    nevets68 nevets68
    46-50, M
    3 Responses Jan 21

    Got two scars on me that tell a story.

    When I was thirteen, I lived with my uncle (he was a roommate that my mom let in). He had a really nasty temper. He lived with us for three years because he couldn't get a job (he did have one for some time, but because of his temper he got fired). He treated both me and my mom...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Aug 5, 2015

    I use to do this back in junior high

    but now that i look back at it, i realize how selfish i was. I pitied myself cause no one else would and complained about things i could actually change, and my life was decent. Cutting doesn't help solve issues, talking about it does
    stephanieleon34211 stephanieleon34211
    16-17, F
    1 Response Jul 15, 2015

    I know it might be hard to blieve

    that I would ever do that for myself. Everyone sees me as the awalyse happy one or the up beat type. But I hide all my feeling behind a fake smile. I say im fine when its not awalyse true. I say im all good and just act like I brush the feelings off my sholder. When I am...
    Kiki145 Kiki145
    16-17, F
    6 Responses Mar 10, 2014

    The first girl I ever truly loved.

    She meant the world to me. She was beautiful, smart, cute, funny.. I saw her as perfect. Yet she's the reason I started self harming, she hurt me more than anybody ever has. She'd tell me to my face that she loved me, then talk about me behind my back. Eventually she cheated on...
    dannyhdh dannyhdh
    18-21, M
    Jan 13

    8 months.... I was ok

    for 8 months. well I said goodbye to that last night. I just couldn't do it anymore. I did it on my ankle this time so I can blame it on my bird... I was so close. just a few more months and it would be a year...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Sep 4, 2015

    Hey I'm Josh :) I use to cut quite often

    but thanks to my girlfriend I managed to stop doing it and have been clean for 3months 4days now :) but everyday it's getting harder and harder and the urges are getting stronger and I don't know how long I can last :(
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    5 Responses Jun 24, 2015

    Running through my old playlist " Breathe Into

    Me" by Red.... I remember cutting for the first time with that song playing over and over again,get this crazy flashbacks when I hear that song, it´s like that feeling is almost back in my skin,even though it´s a bad memory, I accept it, I can´t believe I used to be so...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Jun 4, 2015

    Self Injury

    I started when i was in high school at the time i didnt really know why i was doing it.  By the time i was in my senior i had stopped.  Then when i was a junior in college i was sexually assulted.  After that i started cutting again and often.   Whenever...
    clancyfan clancyfan
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Oct 23, 2006

    I haven't done for about 2 years.

    I've been on and off before and I was finally feeling like my life was getting good.. objectively maybe it is. I meam I've been doing many new and interesting things, joined a debate group at collegue, met new people but in the end I ended up alone again.. although i thought...
    fl1993 fl1993
    22-25, F
    1 Response Nov 2, 2015

    I died I came back to life

    and next time I die I’ll come back to life again and then when I die I’ll be dead for sure which reminds me of a book called pet sematary which is cool because people come back to life because there was a burial ground that bring people back to life if they are dead and that...
    jasonBK1 jasonBK1
    18-21, M
    1 Response Mar 25
    19BiGirl 19BiGirl
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Nov 1, 2015

    I've actually had more thoughts about doing it

    again, but the cutting only really began a few months ago. At first it'd be on the creases of my fingers, so nobody would know....but then I figured I wanted to see MORE blood. So, as of today, I have like 4 scars on my wrist. Funny thing is? It wasn't as what the movies depict...
    MyNameMeansLight MyNameMeansLight
    18-21, F
    Jun 10, 2014

    I Hate To Admit...

    Almost 2 years ago i used to cut.. i still wear some of the scars, almost like a faded memory of my past. I wasn't trying to get attention at all... i used to hide it by wearing a jacket all the time... but nobody knew the story behind it. I hate people that judge they only know...
    MaxWilleatyourbrains MaxWilleatyourbrains
    16-17, F
    4 Responses May 19, 2012

    I think I'm finally finished cutting it was a

    long and hard time to stop self harming but I'm so happy it's over there's literally only one cut that's visible now so that's cool and I haven't cut in ages
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Nov 17, 2015

    I wanna cut so badly everything just seems to

    be turning to ****. I wanna cut until I hit a vein and bleed out. just end everything
    PlayingPretty PlayingPretty
    13-15, F
    Mar 23

    I'm throwing my blades

    and glass away today
    yeahohwell yeahohwell
    13-15, F
    6 Responses Apr 12, 2014

    It never helps that I was suicidle 3 years ago

    because I lost someone I loved, and other people are saying they want to end their lives...I'm sorry but i used to cut nearly everyday, because if my past, then it drove me to be suicide because I thought "there's just no point anymore." But when I stood out on the train tracks...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Jun 19, 2015

    I cut myself tonight.

    It had been months, maybe even a year, without cutting. Today was just too damn hard. It seemed like the only thing that I could do. My other coping methods were spent. I tried reaching out, tried writing in my journal, tried to distract myself with tv and calm myself with...
    Babaghanouj Babaghanouj
    22-25, F
    1 Response Sep 23, 2015

    I remember the pain when i cut my arm,

    but the pain was to ease my anger. Now that i think about it, it actually save me from being crazy.... Unless i was already crazy then it saved me from being weak or broken down Again.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Jul 14, 2015

    This past year has been the most difficult year

    of my life. And it all came from problems that weren't even mine. I fell in love with a girl whom had major problems. She has depression and was sexually abused by her own father. I got dragged into all her issues and became depressed for some time. I had mixed feelings about...
    mytroubledboo mytroubledboo
    18-21, M
    May 25, 2014

    I've been close to relapsing lately.

    There's so much stress and so much pain. I've been clean for months. It replays in my mind over and over, how much better I will feel if I cut. I'm scared. I'm scared of myself. My psychiatrist wants to admit me to a hospital, that scares me too. I'm just scared. I don't know...
    muffinsfrommountains muffinsfrommountains
    16-17, M
    2 Responses Apr 12

    I'm getting so close to turning again,

    I can feel it. I feel like anything could push me over the line right now, I don't wanna cut again; I don't want to go back to that dark place. That dark place where none but few can reach you, and this time there's no one to pull me out. I'm not looking for sympathy from...
    randomboy42 randomboy42
    18-21, M
    2 Responses Dec 31, 2014

    I used to cut a lot in my highschool days.

    Stressed, seeking attention and depressed, all due to having a broken family. Every time I see girls of my age bonding with their mom and dad, I was like, "how would it feel to have a complete family". Moreover, being neglected by mom, made it worse. She used to spend a lot if...
    AiCutter AiCutter
    18-21, F
    Aug 8, 2015

    Guess who hasnt cut herself in a long time?

    ??? This girl :)))) its been a few months :o Weed is my new therapy. Don't know if thats good or bad. O well XD
    Slowlydying16 Slowlydying16
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Apr 16, 2015

    I used to cut just over a year ago

    but then I injured myself really badly. I now walk with a permanent limp because I cut too deep and tore a muscle and they couldn't fix it. If you've ever watched "House" then you probably can understand how I walk.
    PanicAtTheBlink PanicAtTheBlink
    16-17, M
    1 Response Jul 2, 2014

    I'm a swimmer. so it was really hard to find

    areas to cut that would not be visible. i used to cut my fingers and my wrists. i would cover them with bracelets. one day when i was cutting and crying, i asked my self why i was doing this? And truthfully i could not answer that question. I believed i was doing it cause of the...
    punkpanda3 punkpanda3
    16-17, F
    2 Responses Mar 23, 2014

    i have been clean for a few days

    but now i just feel like i need to begin cutting myself again it's just too much right now I am absolutely sick of telling people im okay while im not, I'm broken inside..
    anxietyoopss anxietyoopss
    16-17, F
    2 Responses Nov 2, 2015

    Its actually really weird.

    And this may be a trigger to some people but its like cutting helped me. I used to be so..... sensitive/emotional but after cutting its like the veil was opened and I stopped letting stuff get to me and now I might be a little bit too callous and lacking emotion, and I think I...
    DrBlood DrBlood
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 25, 2015

    No i have never done this

    and i won't do it :) iam writting this is because guys please try n understand that self harming and hurting yourself won't releif the pressure of tension and things you worry about try and sort things rather than cutting yourself and self harming :) stay strong guys and girls...
    ronnyCool ronnyCool
    22-25, M
    May 21, 2014
    MrReaper2 MrReaper2
    13-15, M
    3 Responses Aug 29, 2015
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