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I Want To Be Dead As Soon As Possible

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 33 People

    I think about crashing my car into a highway

    divider. I would only do it in the middle of the night because I don't want to endanger innocent people. I don't wear my seatbelt anymore (it's been almost 2 years) because if I get into an accident I don't want to survive it. It's so twisted. I know it is. I'm just so...
    absolom absolom 41-45 4 Responses Apr 27

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    Felt That Way Many Years Ago

    i wanted to be dead so i could join the ones i loved very much i wanted it so bad i took jobs all over the world hunting death i have always felt cheated by GOD as he told me it was not my time yet and i had to go back to a body that was all broken to tell from a plane crash...
    rickibrat2 rickibrat2 61-65, M Feb 26, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    I dated this girl for about 5 months or so but I knew her for a while be before hand. We went out on dates and we had a good time together, well I did at least. Anyway I made my...
    novo86 novo86 22-25, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    9th post. My second daughter was born in 1997, very cute, but then again babies are so adorable. Their innocence always gets me. I discharged early from hospital, like I had done...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F Nov 19

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    27th post. So basically my husband bashed me for years and years. There were things thrown at me such as plates, glass ashtrays, tables, punches, choking, whatever he felt like at...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 3 Responses Nov 30

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    It's been a few months since I checked my EP Mail and when I opened it today I had 33 unread messages. Wow, I thought to myself, people must really be identifying with my stories...
    Oldboxy Oldboxy 70+, M 1 Response Dec 2

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    Prologue- It wasn't every day or even most days. As I grew older. As days turned to weeks to months and finally years. At the oddest moments. The light would be sapped from my...
    TenThousandSorrows TenThousandSorrows 22-25, F Nov 20

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    Prologue- It wasn't every day or even most days. As I grew older. As days turned to weeks to months and finally years. At the oddest moments. The light would be sapped from my...
    TenThousandSorrows TenThousandSorrows 22-25, F Nov 20

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    17th post...Let me start this post with a little apology. I take antidepressants, and they have kept me from, metaphorically speaking, pulling the trigger. But one of the downsides...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response Nov 24

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    26th post. So here is another blast from the past. This probably happened about 2 years ago, at the height of my anxiety, and when my mental illness was developing into much more...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F Nov 30

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    Before my birth my Mom was told no heartbeat can be found ,your child has died and we need to remove the fetus ,,Mom said no ,,,I want my Mom and her friends to pray ,,they did...
    rckt148 rckt148 51-55, M 2 Responses Nov 29

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    40th post...Wow, it's my 40th birthday in 3 months and this is my 40th post. I'm going to take this post as being symbolic. How am I feeling today?? I can feel the bad feelings...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response Dec 10

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    56th post..This will be my last post on the Sydney siege. 2 innocent lives were lost early this morning, as a selfish individual stormed a coffee shop and decided to play God for a...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    43rd post. Haven't written for a few days, and unfortunately I'm back to being in a slump. Not sleeping more than about 3 hours a night, and my mind is on fast forward with a...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    16th Post. One of my favourite songs of all time is Free by Rudimental, but you really have to go into youtube and watch the clip to appreciate the song. The theme of the song...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response Nov 21

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    i am bored, alone, dead want a girlfriend to make it worse if possible
    kiarash kiarash 13-15, M 1 Response Dec 7

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    Every year I get a little closer to the "...plenty of time to be dead..." part of this statement. On the other hand, I've waited all my life to be this age and, in truth, I'm...
    Oldboxy Oldboxy 70+, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    When I first met Wade, it was while playing X-Men Legends II: Rise of Apocalypse, he appeared completely brainwashed by Mr Sinister. And the funny thing is that he was aware of it...
    PeterPalmer PeterPalmer 22-25, M Nov 30

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    10th post. I feel so guilty sharing my story, as I feel like I'm dissing someone behind their back. I'm telling our story, but this other person can't defend themselves, so please...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response Nov 19

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    13th post. "Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me." I wish it would end, I wish it would end, I wish it would end. My life that is, and I can't seem to stop thinking...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 2 Responses Nov 20

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    Update: I feel much better, thanks to my mom and peanut butter-smothered rice cakes. In case you didn't catch the comment, basically I passed out in the kitchen right in front of...
    adianoeta adianoeta 26-30, F 5 Responses Nov 29

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    I just haven't found her yet. I want to meet her a soon as possible so I can spend every second of the day of the rest of my life with her. I want to think of her when I wake up...
    imhereforyou18 imhereforyou18 18-21, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I adore loneliness, can't afford dealing with tricky people whose are full of jealousy and hatred, I just enjoying my own company because I will never harm my feelings, I will...
    zolito zolito 31-35, M 2 days ago

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    I think that most people with any kind of social interaction these days suffers from some form of body image problem, or at the very least a desire to appear attractive to others...
    EmperorJulian EmperorJulian 46-50, M 3 Responses Nov 19

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    Hello I am Suresh, 23yrs. I am from India and completed high school. I love the people who likes me and who gives me importance. and I want a lover who is also my best friend...
    suresh9015 suresh9015 22-25, M Nov 20

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    i want to make new friends so feel free to message me, I will message you back as soon as possible, if I don't I am busy with studies or work
    extreme1 extreme1 18-21, M Nov 23

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    Anyone who is 13-15 please message me if you want a friend like me. I'm very trust worthy, kind and very funny when it comes to my friends. I love talking to people and i reply as...
    nomorelies13 nomorelies13 13-15, F Nov 26

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    I want to become one and I really would like to know if anyone one would be willing to help me become a werewolf. If you can turn people please message me soon as possible!!! :)
    ShadowNyx ShadowNyx 16-17, F 2 Responses Nov 30

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    We post RS gold creating information and RS information as soon as possible.Troll Intrusion own started its strike regarding Burthorpe in serious, moving in the Death Level in to...
    zhuanghan zhuanghan 22-25, F Dec 3

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    I need run away soon I dead inside
    matrixwolf matrixwolf 16-17, M Dec 6

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    A murder has happened recently in a building that I used to go to for work purposes, which makes me feel close to the ‘scene’ and more disgusted by the crime, because I am...
    MissGaga MissGaga 22-25, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    45th post. Totally unrelated to my story, but Sydney is under siege. I'm currently watching the news and it appears there will be a violent terrorist attack today. Hostages of...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I haven't been able to sleep all night and I can't stop thinking it would be better if I was dead. I don't just think it, I FEEL like I need to be dead. I don't live, I only exist...
    c130patra c130patra 26-30, F 3 Responses Nov 18

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    8th post. I almost decided yesterday not to continue my story, and then I thought it would not be fair to myself. It just seems a huge task, and then my mind started playing those...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response Nov 19

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    18th post. For anyone who has been following my posts this one is a must read. I am shaking and my hands are sweating bullets because I know this is the truth of it all. The actual...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 5 Responses Nov 24

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    21st post. Well the other day, I did something that had me very very excited. For some people this will sound like nothing, and most people do this every single day of their lives...
    rana3434 rana3434 36-40, F 1 Response Nov 25

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    I hate to play the Bad Cop Advocate here, but Dawn was really just trying to show strength. She was trying to show that she was still in control. Even though she gave a little to...
    DayDreamingDragon DayDreamingDragon 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 30

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    I am constantly depressed now. I wish I was dead but I'm too weak to kill myself yet. Hopefully I will gain the strength I need to end this miserable existence. I hate this world...
    quorker quorker 26-30, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    me in bed: i wish i was dead me peeing: i wish i was dead me eating: i wish i was dead me 24/7: i wish i was dead
    Angelcum Angelcum 18-21, F 13 Responses Nov 23

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    I'm 33 single mom can't get a boyfriend no one wants to date a single mom. I've been lonely for so many years I have no family. The only family I had was my brother and he died...
    mysadlife1111 mysadlife1111 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 23

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    I belong to a fair number of experience groups but none as inspiring to me (and apparently none less understood by everyone else) as this one. I think the lack of understanding...
    johnstlouis johnstlouis 56-60, M Nov 29

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    Not Waving but Drowning" by Stevie Smith Nobody heard him, the dead man,
But still he lay moaning:
I was much further out than you thought
And not waving but drowning. Poor...
    silenttomorrows silenttomorrows 51-55, M Dec 3

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    Isn’t it supposed to be the people that love you and say how much they care for you support you? I know I’m pretty damn stupid as everyone keeps telling me but I’m smart...
    LoveLessOne97 LoveLessOne97 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 22

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    I would have never given this much thought until joining ep and making connections and friendships here. When you remove the physical part of getting to know someone your other...
    455cargirl 455cargirl 36-40, F 25 Responses Nov 24

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    Don't get me wrong I love love love the Walking Dead but tonight's episode just... Killed me! It was a good episode other than Beth's death!!! She was just reuniting with Daryl...
    Trinityde Trinityde 13-15, F 6 Responses Dec 1

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