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I Want to Cut Myself Now

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 2,474 People

    Here It Goes..

    I don't know what this is.. Or who reads this, but hello! Within the past two weeks, I've started cutting. I haven't cut in four years, but now it's coming back. And the ability to be able to show what I'm feeling on the inside, on the outside, is amazing to me.. I was also...
    MaddelynneJannessa MaddelynneJannessa 18-21, F 16 Responses Oct 18, 2013

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    I seriously feel the urge to harm myself,

    and I know it's wrong but I have no other way to express pain. I honestly don't know what to do right now. I have no one to talk to. Now where to go, I feel like I'm drowning in my own air. I have no way to describe how I feel. I'm on the verge of tears.. I have self harmed in...
    biebbrauhll biebbrauhll 13-15, F 9 Responses Aug 9

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    I have been going down the list,

    and seeing what people have been posting about this and to be honest it does hurt me to read some of them. I see more post from girls then guys and I know to a point the reasons I did it up until about a year ago, were for different reasons, and I am not putting down anybody...
    mlcockrell mlcockrell 36-40, M 2 Responses Feb 24

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    I don't even know why.

    I think seeing the scars and newest cuts on my hip set me off. I just...I don't know!!! Music can only help so much. I want to sit here and scratch at my hip but I can't exactly do that in class. I feel the need to carry my blade with me everyday now, but I don't think I can...
    EmoSakurachan EmoSakurachan 16-17 1 Response May 6

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    4 Am And Its All I Can Think About

    cutting releases endorphins-endorphins relief pain so what do we do when were sad? we cut
    sosick123 sosick123 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 1, 2013

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    I hate myself so much.

    Why am I so bad? Why am I so ugly? Why am I so insecure? Why just why. I hate it that the guy I like, no, scratch that, love. I hate it that the guy I LOVE likes my best friend. I hate it that she's so much better than me. I hate it that she's so perfect. I hate it that everyone...
    IDontKnowAnymore13 IDontKnowAnymore13 13-15, F 3 Responses May 11

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    I sleep walk and wake up with cuts

    and bruises that scare me sometimes, because I never remember exactly how! Am also a bit clumsey and sometime cut my hands during arts and crafts... Getting better at not hurting my hands with a little concentration! Never played sports incase of injury, but that could...
    buglivesinshit buglivesinshit 26-30, F Jul 6

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    DONT Want to Think About It

    i have those thoughts in my head i have those emotions in my heart i wanna talk i need some1 by my side   they told me many times before " when ever u need me i'll be there " i need them now and i cant find them i feel like cutting my hand and i...
    aysha7 aysha7 18-21, F 9 Responses May 12, 2009

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    PLEASE BE MY CO-WRITER FOR A REALISTIC DRAMA

    NOVEL ABOUT A WOMAN IN PRISON!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Blipsycat Blipsycat 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 6

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    I Hate Myself And Cut For No Reason

    I'm 16. I'm very unsociable and don't like the company of many people. I only have one really good friend, but i go to a really tough school and have to spend most of my time doing homework. I have trouble paying attention to the boring stuff they teach in that awful place, so it...
    invisiblechild0 invisiblechild0 18-21, F 14 Responses Apr 15, 2012

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    i want to cut so bad.

    . theres so much going on and like i cant handle it. and ugh. im freaking out.. theres soooo much going on in my head and in my life.. ugh., but my mom threw away my blades and i cant go to the store to buy one because its 1:00 am. :( :'( **** my life..
    xxxalyssabrownxxx xxxalyssabrownxxx 13-15, F 4 Responses Aug 2

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    This is how I feel: Would it be wrong,

    would it be right? If I took my life tonight, Chances are that I might Mutilation out of sight And I'm contemplating suicide 'Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine Losing my sight, losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine...
    Mikesmithg1 Mikesmithg1 16-17, M 2 Responses Aug 8

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    Release

    The feelings, The screams Are tearing at my insides, They are ripping me to shreds, They are making me cry, .Deafened by there pitch as they grow to a painful level, A painful high! I am filling up and am about to explode, Burst, My heart is turned to stone, I am always alone...
    sazzle82 sazzle82 26-30, F 3 Responses Jan 27, 2012

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    I really want to cut my wrist.

    I have not cut in 3 weeks and I really want to right now
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Jul 9

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    Don't. Don't. Don't. Stop it.

    Weak. You are so freaking weak. Get a f**ing grip!! Don't throw it all away. Nothing is wrong. Why do I feel this way???
    NowGoBringMeTheHorizon NowGoBringMeTheHorizon 18-21, F Jul 8

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    I just don't care anymore.

    I'm starting to not care if people know. If people see. I just don't care. I feel like everyone already judges me and hates me, it wouldn't make a difference. Maybe if they knew, people would actually care. I doubt that though. The more time goes on, the worse it gets. People...
    thoughtfulstars thoughtfulstars 13-15, F 1 Response May 16

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    Recently I've wanted to cut again.

    I've been thinking a lot about my parents and how dumb they are. Then just last week my cousin told me that my mom was pregnant when she married my dad. And that that was why they got married. And I feel like they're getting the divorce is my fault too now that I know that
    JalenFrankie616 JalenFrankie616 13-15, F 3 Responses Jul 30

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    I just need to release the pain I feel inside

    that's just been building up. I don't want to go to a psych hospital where they stick u on a million drugs. I know how it is, I've been there before. And u walk around feeling all drugged up and loopy because they don't know what to do with you. I'd rather sit here and cut, and...
    Rayven1997 Rayven1997 16-17, F 2 Responses Aug 2

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    I'm a recovering cutter

    and i can't take the stress and erges I'm going through right now. I battle depression and my parents are fighting right now I just want to take the glass I have in my room and cut my legs and arms so bad :( and I'm thinking about the bullying I went through and suffering from...
    smilethroughit55 smilethroughit55 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 9

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    Sigh. This just isn't getting any easier,

    is it? I'm so tempted to take that nice fresh new blade out of the only pencil sharpener that I have that's never been taken apart... I keep trying to find enough reasons not to cut that it outweighs the crushing desire to do so, but I'm running out of reasons here... :/
    Yourguardianangel9613 Yourguardianangel9613 16-17, F 2 Responses May 6

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    I hurt inside. I don't know what else to say.

    These prissy little baby cuts on my shoulder don't signify anymore. I want to go after my arms like I used to.
    LesbianBlue LesbianBlue 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 2

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    TheHouseElf TheHouseElf 16-17, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    Know The Feeling?

    I feel alone in a room full of people and cutting just sounds so good right now.
    WanderingRanger WanderingRanger 18-21, M 4 Responses Oct 28, 2013

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    I hurt so bad. I tried

    so hard. I wrote a poem, worked a little on my book, worked on my drawing for my friend...but it hurts too much and my wrists are hot with need to relieve the pressure and I don't know how much longer I can hold off...there's a razor right here and I want it so much I can barely...
    LesbianBlue LesbianBlue 18-21, F 2 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    There is so much **** going on with me.

    That and i done some vary ******* wrong things i feel like i deserve that pain
    Frozenfireflies Frozenfireflies 13-15, M 5 Responses Jul 12

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    Fighting The Urge

    Lately I feel like my family hates me like they are testing me, I have a razor from a pencil sharpener in my shoebox. But I won't use it I refuse to cut myself because I don't want to hide the cuts, the scars, the razors or the blood. That doesn't stop me from thinking about it...
    Gibby445 Gibby445 13-15, F Dec 15, 2012

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    ...and if I'm being honest,

    sometimes I never want to give up this bad habit. How can something capable of killing me make me feel alive? Right now it's the only thing that's keeping me sane besides my eating disorder and it's just my relief and comfort, and honestly if it weren't for my razor blades and...
    XSimplyXSuicideX XSimplyXSuicideX 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 22

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    I need a co-writer for a realistic drama novel

    about a woman in prison. Please help me.
    Blipsycat Blipsycat 16-17, M Aug 6

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    Cravings

    There are some days, weeks even, where the thoughts of sliding the smooth blade of my knife into my skin flood my head. There's something so satisfying about the pain. The little teardrops of red running over the curve of my wrist. The way my teeth grit, and my eyes plead with me...
    Girlonwire Girlonwire 18-21, F 13 Responses Jul 3, 2011

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    I am so depressed. I literally think about

    killing myself every single day of my life, but I'm too much of a coward to go through with it. I'm sick of living. I have no friends, and I never will. Everytime I think i find out, they abandon me and make me more suicidal than ever. I am so sick and tired of this waste of an...
    blipsycat1 blipsycat1 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 16

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    How much will I have to do

    before I return to normal? If I just sat down in the shower so the blood would wash away, how long would it take before I cut out all the things wrong with me? I want all the bad things to go away on the tide of blood. I don't want suicide. I don't want to kill myself...
    LesbianBlue LesbianBlue 18-21, F Aug 14

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    I think if doing this a lot mostly

    when thins go wrong or presser gets on top of me thank god I haven't but I still think of it
    scottishbigguy scottishbigguy 22-25, M 1 Response Aug 12

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    A Year.... Wasted.

    I promised myself I wouldn't, but the promise really wasn't for me, it was for my little brother. He said "If you cut, I can cut too". So, I promised him, and myself that I would stop. I did. For a whole year. It was tough, REALLY tough, but his love, and his courage got me...
    bbmango16 bbmango16 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 28, 2012

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    merrianneyeah merrianneyeah 13-15, F 5 Responses Jun 8

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    Any one has a razor .

    i really need to cut myself and see my blood . I am sick of always hurting myself from inside if I can't stop myself from inside I will do it on the outside.
    DrowningInPain2 DrowningInPain2 13-15, F Apr 4

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    I want to cut so bad right now.

    I work at a summer camp though and they noticed my scars last year. So they always keep an eye out to see if they are fresh. If they're fresh I get sent home. This is the only place I feel like I have a family and friends and the love of my life is here so we get to spend...
    virginiamarie94 virginiamarie94 18-21, F Jul 10

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    I never in a million years thought I would be

    at the point where I thought hurting myself was the only answer. But I'm there. It is the most real and terrifying thought that has ever crossed my mind. I have never actually done it. I am too afraid of the scars it will leave. But I have started pinching myself so hard that it...
    dressydreamer dressydreamer 18-21, F 6 Responses Mar 10

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    My daemons are screaming at me telling me I

    need to, I want to, I have to. I scream "NO!" Want to put it down but my hand just won't let go
    Error404nameunknown Error404nameunknown 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 4

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    I want to so bad and I don't know

    if I can fight the urge...
    Sammi72 Sammi72 13-15, F 7 Responses Apr 22

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    You guys there's a better solution,

    if you guys ever need someone to talk to I'm here.
    lilay98 lilay98 16-17, F 3 Responses Jun 24

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    I need a co-writer for a realistic drama novel

    about a woman in prison. Please help me.
    Blipsycat Blipsycat 16-17, M Aug 6

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    I haven't since 6-30-14

    but I'm struggling not to cut, I really want to
    Waterstorm Waterstorm 13-15, F 4 Responses Aug 11

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    What is the point in living

    when all you want to do is die, nobody talks when they do we argue, nobody would care if I died so whats the point in living...😣
    emma760 emma760 16-17, F 2 Responses Jun 28

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    i want to cut so deep

    that i see a lot of blood. my flashbacks are ruining my life and i cant be happy anymore
    elephant17 elephant17 16-17, F 2 Responses May 18

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    Im laying here with music

    but really i just give up i don't give a **** any more i don't cate if any one finds out because its their fault for putting these thoughts in me
    desitor desitor 16-17, F 3 Responses Aug 12

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    My Pleasure

    it seems like a pleasure to cut it feels like it can be my only sense of release. i feel like im slipping into a depression and i dont enjoy expressing feelings to people i know. ive been seeing a school psychologist but its not really helping it just makes me feel worse because...
    karissaxx22 karissaxx22 16-17, F 8 Responses May 7, 2012

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    I've gained an addiction to cutting,

    and now I HAVE to do it whether I'm sad or angry or even happy at times, when the urge hits me no matter where I am or who's around I have to do it. I do, do it.
    Tamika123 Tamika123 16-17, F 4 Responses May 9

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    I Dont Know Where I Am

    it sucks to know that feeling sad is normal so you're starting to get used to it and no matter what the sadness wont leave. you try so hard but no. it sucks to self-harm almost everyday and nothing can stop you, you want to do it and continue doing it, it feels good. it sucks to...
    karissaxx22 karissaxx22 16-17, F 4 Responses Dec 2, 2012

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    xMayesx xMayesx 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 10

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    Beautiful

              I'm possessed. My whole life is focused on this one thing: cutting. when I'm not doing it, I'm wondering when i will again, how to hide the scars, the scabs. where am i going to get new bandages, Neosporen, razor blades. I started carrying a blade with me in my...
    screamingsilently screamingsilently 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 12, 2012

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    really miss cutting so much.

    😕 that's all I've been thinking about lately..
    ashleygrierrr ashleygrierrr 13-15, F 19 Responses Jun 28

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    I used to but havent

    for a long time. But I still feel like it, its so hard not to.
    lacess lacess 18-21, F 8 Responses Apr 17

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    PLEASE BE MY CO-WRITER FOR A REALISTIC DRAMA

    NOVEL ABOUT A WOMAN IN PRISON!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Blipsycat Blipsycat 16-17, M Aug 9

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    Being yelled at really makes me want to cut.

    My life also really makes me want to cut. And lately it's been difficult to find something that would cut deep and cause a lot of blood shed. Sometimes I feel as if I deserve the pain and blood loss. Sometimes I cry when I cut, other times I don't. I usually use scissors to cut...