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I Want to Cut Myself Now

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,564 People

    rokrchik1211 rokrchik1211
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 24, 2015


    There are some days, weeks even, where the thoughts of sliding the smooth blade of my knife into my skin flood my head. There's something so satisfying about the pain. The little teardrops of red running over the curve of my wrist. The way my teeth grit, and my eyes plead with me...
    Girlonwire Girlonwire
    18-21, F
    13 Responses Jul 3, 2011

    My daemons are screaming at me telling me I

    need to, I want to, I have to. I scream "NO!" Want to put it down but my hand just won't let go
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Jul 4, 2014

    I have *never* wanted to cut myself.

    ..I don't get it, maybe someone can explain the reasoning behind it. Does it feel good? Do you recommend it? Is this something I should try?
    myalterego77 myalterego77
    36-40, M
    3 Responses Aug 26, 2015

    Our body feels pain to warn us of danger But it

    also reminds us we're alive that it can still feel That's why some of us seek it out while others choose to numb it Solitude has always been my analgesic of choice But what if feeling nothing is the worst pain of all What if sharing pain connects us to others and reminds us...
    Kate197979 Kate197979
    36-40, F
    1 Response Nov 15, 2014

    I want to cut so badly.

    I shouldn't want to. I have an amazing life and 3 beautiful partners. I shared something I never tell anyone with one of my partners and I think I might have freaked him out. last night he said he was fine with it but he isn't texting me and his wife has been talking to me today...
    monstertrainwreck monstertrainwreck
    22-25, F
    1 Response Oct 7, 2015

    I Hate Myself And Cut For No Reason

    I'm 16. I'm very unsociable and don't like the company of many people. I only have one really good friend, but i go to a really tough school and have to spend most of my time doing homework. I have trouble paying attention to the boring stuff they teach in that awful place, so it...
    invisiblechild0 invisiblechild0
    22-25, F
    17 Responses Apr 15, 2012

    I never in a million years thought I would be

    at the point where I thought hurting myself was the only answer. But I'm there. It is the most real and terrifying thought that has ever crossed my mind. I have never actually done it. I am too afraid of the scars it will leave. But I have started pinching myself so hard that it...
    dressydreamer dressydreamer
    22-25, F
    7 Responses Mar 10, 2014

    tonight has been horrible,

    I want to cut so bad but I don't want anyone to notice it tomorrow, it has been a long time but, the blade is screaming my name and my heart can't help but listen.
    0love 0love
    1 Response Aug 14, 2015

    Being yelled at really makes me want to cut.

    My life also really makes me want to cut. And lately it's been difficult to find something that would cut deep and cause a lot of blood shed. Sometimes I feel as if I deserve the pain and blood loss. Sometimes I cry when I cut, other times I don't. I usually use scissors to cut...
    NeonPurple NeonPurple
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Mar 9, 2014

    Shiny is the razorI hold

    now in my handRed is the blood that’s drippingFrom the cuts my skin couldn’t withstandL is for lostThere is no one to understandO is for obliviousBecause my mind is a wastelandS stands for sadnessIt is my daily retort deliberationE obviously represents emotionMine is...
    darkreality68 darkreality68
    41-45, M
    Oct 1, 2015


              I'm possessed. My whole life is focused on this one thing: cutting. when I'm not doing it, I'm wondering when i will again, how to hide the scars, the scabs. where am i going to get new bandages, Neosporen, razor blades. I started carrying a blade with me in my...
    screamingsilently screamingsilently
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Sep 12, 2012

    i want to cut so deep

    that i see a lot of blood. my flashbacks are ruining my life and i cant be happy anymore
    19BiGirl 19BiGirl
    18-21, F
    2 Responses May 18, 2014

    I want to tear my arms

    and legs up so bad. Make deep gaping cuts. Maybe I'll end up bleeding out..
    rokrchik1211 rokrchik1211
    22-25, F
    Oct 4, 2015

    I feel alive when I can't sleep

    because of the burning scars -funny enough I punish myself for things other people did to me.
    00Broken00 00Broken00
    18-21, F
    May 10, 2015

    I broke up with my ex,

    because I wasn't ready to tell anyone about my self harm. We never had a real reason to break up, so I've never really been able to get over him. I saw him the other night and the feelings came back for both of us, but he's supposed to be moving to Australia. He told my friend...
    anon1995 anon1995
    22-25, F
    Jul 8, 2015

    A Year.... Wasted.

    I promised myself I wouldn't, but the promise really wasn't for me, it was for my little brother. He said "If you cut, I can cut too". So, I promised him, and myself that I would stop. I did. For a whole year. It was tough, REALLY tough, but his love, and his courage got me...
    bbmango16 bbmango16
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Dec 28, 2012

    Would it really even matter

    if I did tear up my skin? It's not like I have anyone anyway...
    rokrchik1211 rokrchik1211
    22-25, F
    1 Response Oct 20, 2015

    school is really stressing me out.

    im feeling overwhelmed and im getting mad at myself and im having all these thoughts to just take my anger out on myself and just cut. i feel like giving up on life but i dont want to take the easy way out. i feel like complete crap. i really dont know whats wrong with me. i...
    deleted deleted
    6 Responses Jan 28, 2015

    UGH!! I want to cut right now.

    I get made fun of in school for having autism. This one girl keeps bullying me an hitting me I cant anymore. UGH!!! Holding a razor right now.
    NaomiSarah1 NaomiSarah1
    22-25, F
    8 Responses Jul 25, 2015

    I have been going down the list,

    and seeing what people have been posting about this and to be honest it does hurt me to read some of them. I see more post from girls then guys and I know to a point the reasons I did it up until about a year ago, were for different reasons, and I am not putting down anybody...
    mlcockrell mlcockrell
    41-45, M
    2 Responses Feb 24, 2014

    I have had a long, hard,

    stressful day. I am drained and just really feel like relapsing
    rokrchik1211 rokrchik1211
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Aug 8, 2015

    Do not cut yourself! Try instead the sensations

    of being pierced, tattooed and especially scarified. Better looking results and for many a similar release oif tensions!
    deleted deleted
    Aug 25, 2015

    I haven't cut in maybe 7 months

    but I haven't been taking my meds like I should 😢
    PurpleHart PurpleHart
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jul 28, 2015

    Best cut is when I close my eyes .

    And just cut three places really fast on wrist. I rather feel the pain outside than in
    officialjaylove officialjaylove
    9 Responses May 5, 2015

    I want to cut so badly.

    ... How do i actually cut though? I can push the blade but my skin is too strong...
    AirSlice AirSlice
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Aug 25, 2015

    Can someone talk to me?

    ??? I'm feeling so alone......
    deleted deleted
    7 Responses Oct 15, 2014
    Kindheartedsoul Kindheartedsoul
    18-21, F
    1 Response Aug 25, 2015

    most of the time I do it to stop the emotional

    pain. Physical pain is alot easier to handle than emotional pain.
    justwannabeehappy justwannabeehappy
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Aug 18, 2015

    So tell me, who will help me?

    When it's 4 am and a shaky hand has my blade against my skin.. And all these thoughts rush in. When my streak is no longer there and I'm in a fetal position crying my eyes out. Who will help me.
    UnderTheSleeves UnderTheSleeves
    18-21, F
    6 Responses Jun 22, 2015

    I just did. Relief from my mind.

    Foolish heart...too old to not know better
    GiannaFlorence GiannaFlorence
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Aug 10, 2015

    Me Vs Razor

    I sat in my room staring at "my razor blade" for about 10mins feeling so lost'd and having loneliness eatting away at my soul and heart. It was drowing me and couldn't breath. I wanted to cut so bad... But I called my best friend and talk to her about it.. She cried a lot and...
    DarkAngel0309 DarkAngel0309
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jan 4, 2013

    It's how I escape from the pain

    for a lil while and right now I really just need to escape. :'(
    rokrchik1211 rokrchik1211
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Feb 6, 2015

    Somebody I've recently come to care about got

    some horrible news and I can't do anything to help them. I hurt so much at the unfairness of it all and I want to cut so bad.
    reluctantamazon reluctantamazon
    41-45, F
    3 Responses Sep 8, 2015

    Here It Goes..

    I don't know what this is.. Or who reads this, but hello! Within the past two weeks, I've started cutting. I haven't cut in four years, but now it's coming back. And the ability to be able to show what I'm feeling on the inside, on the outside, is amazing to me.. I was also...
    MaddelynneJannessa MaddelynneJannessa
    22-25, F
    13 Responses Oct 18, 2013

    I want to cut I am just

    so depressed and just want to cut. No one in my family wants to listen to me. I just want to cut and let all of the pain go away. So mad that I had an allergic reaction today. UGH I am so stupid. Holding a razor right now.
    NaomiSarah1 NaomiSarah1
    22-25, F
    8 Responses Aug 24, 2015

    Know The Feeling?

    I feel alone in a room full of people and cutting just sounds so good right now.
    WanderingRanger WanderingRanger
    22-25, M
    4 Responses Oct 28, 2013

    I haven't cut in over 2 years.

    But my "family" is really making me want to relapse.
    Overlookedintrovert Overlookedintrovert
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Sep 26, 2015

    I really really need a blade.'s been way too long since I got the release...the flood of endorphins.
    rokrchik1211 rokrchik1211
    22-25, F
    Jul 7, 2015
    cashetty69 cashetty69
    51-55, M
    Aug 25, 2015

    I just took a pin and made my first cut.

    At first I just scratched my skin, too scared of the pain. But the mark it left looked beautiful, so i made more and I started to bleed. I'm ready to severe all my ties with everyone involved in my situation. I'm ready to just destroy everything I created just to be away from...
    julespools julespools
    22-25, M
    Jun 30, 2015

    Everytime I cut I know I disappoint him.

    .. But if I know that cutting is a worse pain then whatever pain someone is causing me then why wouldn't i cut? It tells me if cutting is more painful then that other pain will go away... So I will cut until I know the pain will go away.
    AirSlice AirSlice
    22-25, F
    1 Response Sep 25, 2015

    I've been clean all summer.

    But i long to slide a blade over my wrists one more time... One is after all, all it takes.
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Jul 16, 2015

    I want to cut and be done with everything too

    much to handle havent gone to school in about 2 weeks UGH Hugs?
    NaomiSarah1 NaomiSarah1
    22-25, F
    5 Responses Jul 13, 2015

    Why is everything so ******* depressing?

    Why am I such a failure? I fail...that's why I'm here, to fail and let people down...
    ACyanideSurprise ACyanideSurprise
    22-25, M
    Mar 2, 2015

    Just one, from my wrist to my elbow.

    That sounds like a fantastic idea.
    kimberlykhaos kimberlykhaos
    22-25, F
    5 Responses Apr 2, 2015
    huntersveil248 huntersveil248
    18-21, F
    1 Response Sep 26, 2015

    Mirror mirror on the wall,

    please tell me why i can't stand tall. Mirror mirror in my hand, tell me why they don't understand. Mirror mirror hanging there, why does everything seem unfair... Mirror mirror tell me why, i don't find peace even when i cry. Mirror mirror that's seen me bleed, Can no one help...
    jaynm jaynm
    22-25, F
    1 Response Aug 10, 2015

    Its been two days i cant keep it up.

    I really wanna cut and its hard to control this urge. Today wasnt the best of days and I hate myself for it. My parents hate me, im gonna flunk in my courses, and i will never be worth something for anyone to be in a relationship with. Im going to sleep, and i pray i dont wake...
    LifeOnAThread LifeOnAThread
    22-25, F
    9 Responses Oct 12, 2014
    deleted deleted
    5 Responses Sep 3, 2015

    DONT Want to Think About It

    i have those thoughts in my head i have those emotions in my heart i wanna talk i need some1 by my side   they told me many times before " when ever u need me i'll be there " i need them now and i cant find them i feel like cutting my hand and i...
    aysha7 aysha7
    18-21, F
    9 Responses May 12, 2009

    I haven't in 5 years

    but I did the other day
    thatonehighguy thatonehighguy
    22-25, M
    1 Response Aug 18, 2015

    Some time ago I promised myself I wouldn't cut

    myself with a knife anymore. Last night I broke that promise. According to my promise this means I have a problem with cutting. I thought I could handle it, I thought I could keep my promise but apparently I can't. When I don't use the knife I use a sort of wire. It's less...
    jsualmtha jsualmtha
    22-25, F
    Aug 23, 2015

    But I can't disappoint everybody,

    especially him. So what do I do then? Just cry forever I guess.
    reluctantamazon reluctantamazon
    41-45, F
    3 Responses Sep 14, 2015
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